Dearly Beloved
by Cataclysmic Eclipse
Summary: AU Kratos knew it was a mistake and yet it was one that he was willing to make. If it was within his power for Anna to live, Kratos would act. Even if it meant that she was forced to live with him in Derris-Kharlan. NOW with regular updates!
1. Nightmare

_A/N: No matter how long this takes I am going to finish this story and see it through to the end. This is my promise and it is done so on my integrity as a decent person, my love of fashion, art and my passion for writing. _

_I leave the writing in this unchanged so I can see my progress._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia._

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_Nightmare_

The black of night engulfed everything that Kratos saw until the image of his dearly beloved tore across his field of vision and wrapped his entire being in terror. It was a nightmare that he had no wish to come to pass and now that it had all he could do was stare at the image that would haunt him to the depths of eternity. Anna's lifeless body was strewn helplessly across the cold ground with rivulets of her own blood coursing down her paling skin from the wound that he had inflicted by his own sword.

He failed them. He failed Anna and her youthful optimism and Lloyd and his childlike innocence.

"Lloyd!" He snapped out of his daze in a panic. By the Goddess, Lloyd. Where is my son?

Kratos scoured the surrounding cliff side making full usage of his senses for any sign of the little boy that he had become so attached to. He could not allow such a young life to be wiped out so early. He could not allow his own son to die. Not before he did. But there was no tiny boy to greet his eyes nor a corpse to scar his mind. The only sign of Lloyd that he found was a tiny boot encrusted in blood so close to the body of his dearly beloved. He knelt down and picked up the boot in his own hand, stunned.

So this is all that is left of Lloyd, Kratos thought, feeling his entire being succumb to a hopelessness the like he had never experienced before.

"Why?" He said to himself, staring at the boot and imagined all of the pain that Lloyd and Anna had to endure because of his mistake. "Why did this have to happen?"

"Kra…tos…"

It was a voice Kratos knew intimately and his eyes snapped to Anna, whom he had assumed dead. He let the tiny boot slid from his hand and fall softly to the ground as he walked closer to her, the tendrils of fear that gripped his heart prickling painfully.

"Yes, I'm here."

"I…Lloyd is…" Anna's chest was struggling to rise and fall and her attempts at speech only worsened it. Her eyes, which glistened in the light of the crescent moon, turned to his and what he saw made his chest constrict. Her eyes that were normally so full of life and love and joy were now encumbered in such a pain that he had never seen her hold.

"Shh, Anna," he said maintaining the facsimile of calm if only for her. "Don't speak, it won't do anything but worsen your condition."

Her pain-filled eyes mixed with an expression of emotional pain.

"I...I'm sorry. I only wished to…to allow you to have some peace before you…you…" He broke off, hearing his own voice crack. Emotions were threatening to roil to the surface which he would not allow her to see. He failed to protect her in every way possible even before she died.

Kratos saw her hand rise and tremble as it reached out to him. He bridged the gap immediately and gripped it in his own. She squeezed his hand weakly. So in the end she was attempting to comfort him. That held a bitter irony, did it not?

There must be something he could do to comfort her other then watch her slip away from him. Then an epiphany dawned on him.

"Anna, I am going to cast a healing spell, please remain still," Kratos rose his emotionless mask because he needed to be strong for her.

Kratos closed his eyes to create the concentration which had taken him millennia to hone, he knew that the sight of her in such a state would break it. He muttered an incantation under his breath and harnessed all the mana in his body that was safe to use towards the spell. A warm rose in him and he felt that mana escape his body and head towards Anna whom he had visualized in his mind in this basic spell of first aid.

He opened his eyes and saw the ethereal glow that accompanied mana usage surround her body. Her breathing had steadied and her wound did not look as deadly which made Kratos catch his breath in hope. But his mind chastised his heart's hope, he knew that such a simple spell could not save her, it could only buy her time and lessen her pain.

"Thank you," Anna whispered and Kratos' eyes locked with hers. "Now I can say goodbye."

"You're not going to die."

"You and I both know…that I'm gonna die."

"No," he whispered. He did not want to believe it.

Anna smiled a smile that commingled with the pain in her eyes which made the memories of her smiles come to his mind. This smile tore Kratos apart. "I'm so glad I met you, you've done so much for me. You even…killed me for Lloyd, it must have been so hard," Her eyes shaped a desperate tone. "Lloyd's alive, you know, you did it, you protected him."

"Anna, Lloyd is dead. I could find no trace of him," Kratos could not hide the truth of the situation to his beloved, he would only end up regretting it.

"No, I gave Lloyd to a dwarf…and I told him everything so maybe one day Lloyd would know what happened to me...he's safe, you've gotta find him," her tone became as desperate as her eyes and her weak hold tightened around his hand. "Lloyd must be so scared right now, he must feel so alone. Please, go to him."

Kratos felt hope surge through his system at the knowledge of his son's survival yet he was torn as Anna's pain-filled eyes bore into his own.

"What of you? If I search for Lloyd now, what will become of you?"

"Don't worry about me…Lloyd's more important. I'm already dead, anyways."

"No, I will not leave you to die alone," his voice broke when he said 'die' and he did not attempt to hide it anymore. His mind could not think coherently, it was breaking down. Her death was a nightmare and he was living through that same nightmare now.

"I'm being selfish, aren't I? I don't want you to go away too. I must be the worst mother ever."

"Never say that. You're an amazing mother, you've even given your life so Lloyd can have his," Kratos could not allow her to think of herself any less then she was, especially in her final moments. "I promise that I will find Lloyd after you…after…"

"Shh," she whispered to him while squeezing his hand yet again, "I know you care for Lloyd and you'll be such a good father that you'll make up for me not being there. You don't have to say anything else. I love you and I don't regret anything about being with you. Don't you dare forget that."

Kratos stared at her incredulously. Anna knew him well, she knew that these were the thoughts that would plague his mind. "But Anna with my own sword, I killed you."

"It wasn't your fault…Kvar…" And Anna began to convulse which made the tendrils of fear that gripped his heart tear painfully against him and he tightened his hold on her hand.

"No! Please, don't die! Don't leave me! Please, Anna, please..." he felt waves of despair wash over him as he watched her convulsing body slump and her eyes slip closed. And the hopelessness and the despair and the weight of reality all came crashing down at him at once. If she could die...he had never thought that she could die. He had never thought that he would fail. He was watching her slip away from this world and there was nothing he could do. Nothing. "Anna, no, Anna…"

"I've never seen you beg before, Kratos. Its rather unbecoming of a seraphim of Cruxis."

Kratos felt shock course through his system at the familiar drawling voice that he had no wish to hear at that moment. His eyes abruptly came to Yggdrasill's cold and mocking ones.

"How did you find me?" Kratos seethed, unable to control the anger that rose in his voice.

"I read Kvar's report a few moments ago," Yggdrasill said with a tone that did not acknowledge his anger. "I wanted to stop what he was doing but I guess I was too late. I'm so sorry, Kratos, she's dying."

Yggdrasill's gaze dropped briefly to Anna that lay below Kratos. Kratos' eyes narrowed and suspicion rose in him. He doubted Yggdrasill had no idea of Kvar's plan that night and he also doubted that Yggdrasill would have any qualms about her death. All that mattered to Yggdrasill was that his precious Origin Seal remain unharmed and Kratos' mind was not so deluded to believe otherwise. But there was something about Yggdrasill's wording that caught his attention.

"Dying? You mean that she is not already…gone?" Kratos felt hope swell inside himself despite his best efforts to suppress it.

"No, not yet, I can still sense the mana in her body but it's weakening by the second. Soon she'll die. If only I had known about her and her condition sooner, you could have always come to me. I would have commissioned a proper key crest for her that would have worked to suppress her condition and I could've kept Kvar away as well," Kratos glared at him, If I had done that I would be under your power yet again. "Kvar's methods are just too extreme, it was cruel to keep her suffering like that. But if I knew that someone dear to you was suffering, I would have helped. I want you to know that."

"Humph," Kratos' glare intensified. Yggdrasill was insinuating something by his way of speech and Kratos knew that it would not be something that he would like.

"You don't believe me?" Although Yggdrasill's voice mimicked the tone of being hurt, his face held the same impassive expression. "I can't believe we've drifted apart so much in the years you've been away. I care about what you're going through, really I do. Perhaps the healers on Derris-Kharlan could take a look at her, I'm certain that they could save her."

Kratos' eyes narrowed and he fought with the hope that surged throughout his entire system. Yggdrasill had wanted Anna to die, or to almost die, so he could then convince Kratos to return to Derris-Kharlan. That was why Yggdrasill had descended upon Sylvarant at this particular moment. Kratos was no more then a mere pawn in his plan, the Origin's Seal, and Yggdrasill needed to ensure Kratos' loyalty, or at the very least, to keep Kratos near him.

The very logic of the situation was drowned out by the terror in his heart as his gaze shifted to Anna's unconscious form. Her skin was paling beyond what was natural and her hand was limp in his own.

"Very well, I will ascend to Derris-Kharlan. However if she does not receive immediate medical attention…"

"Don't worry about that, of course she will," Yggdrasill's lips twisted into a conniving smile and his crystalline eyes glinted in the light of the crescent moon. "You can trust me, Kratos, I'll make sure she doesn't die."

With that Kratos felt the familiar sensation of the transportation that Yggdrasill favoured to ascend to Derris-Kharlan. Kratos gripped Anna's hand that held as a constant to him as his dark surroundings dissipated about him in place of the cold and lifeless surroundings of Derris-Kharlan.


	2. Imprisonment

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia or any of the characters and I know I never will. I listened to Nightwish while writing the majority of this, so if any lyrics slip into the story, I don't own those either._

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_Imprisonment_

Anna ran through the familiar corridors of the ranch that had stolen too much of her life. She had to run away from them or else she knew that she would die. She wouldn't let herself die, she couldn't let herself die. She saw the corridor end and made a turn to continue her escape. But as she round the corner shock flooded through her as she saw the man that she loathed standing there, as if waiting for her to come.

Kvar.

"You," she hissed as she unsheathed her sword that hung from her side. She saw Kvar smirking that conniving, detestable smirk. How dare he? "Die!"

She plunged her sword forward with all the power her body could muster which was driven by hate.

Anna saw her sword plunged inside of Kvar's midsection, crimson blood spewing from the wound that she had given him. She rose her face in triumph, wanting to see Kvar's face contort in pain that would be but a fraction of the pain she had experienced by his hand. What she saw sent waves of terror crash through her system. It was Kratos. It was the man that she had grown to love, the one that had saved her from the dark abyss of depression, not the man that had brought her to such despair.

"No," she whispered dropping her bloodstained hands from the sword now lodged in his gut, "I thought you were Kvar, Kratos I'm so sorry, I thought you were Kvar. I didn't mean to hurt you, I'd never ever hurt you."

Kratos' head was leaning to the side which caused his auburn hair to cover his face. His head then lulled forward and the auburn hair which covered his face fell away which revealed his face. Anna gasped in horror. Kratos' eyes were crimson. Pure crimson. And his skin was not the natural pallor that she was accustomed to, it was as pale as the skin that she had known a corpse to have. His mouth opened as if to speak but clotted blood, not words, escaped his lips and oozed down his skin.

"No. Please don't die, I don't want you to die, you can't d-"

Pain coursed through her belly and she looked down to see a sword plunged into her gut, blood coursing from the wound and staining the metallic floor until she saw nothing but blood.

"Why?" Anna whispered as she drew her eyes to him. Kratos did nothing save smile.

Anna had no time to respond as the corridors, now marred in her and her husband's blood, shifted and changed to a forest's edge. Multitudes of Desians had appeared to surround her and Kratos. She saw Lloyd out of the corner of her eye, he was beside Kratos and had those same crimson eyes and unnaturally pale skin. Memories overwhelmed her mind of the pain and horror that had happened before. She could not allow her family to die. She could not allow Kvar to take them from her.

"Kratos, get Lloyd and run! Its me they want, not you, forget about me and get away!"

Kratos took no action save leering at her through those crimson eyes and raising his now blood soaked hands.

Kvar appeared by Kratos' side and Anna felt fear course through her for both of those dear to her.

"Kratos, get away from him! He'll kill you and Lloyd!"

But all Kratos did was leer at her through his placid crimson eyes.

Kvar's gaze shifted from her then back at the ones she loved the most, the ones that made her life bearable. She wanted with her entire being for Kvar to disappear. Anna's hand went instinctively to her sword that was always by her side. She would kill Kvar, she would protect the ones she loved.

She moved forward for the attack but pain coursed through her system, the likes of which she had never experienced before. She collapsed onto the ground and noticed then that Kratos' sword was in her gut and blood coursed from her body.

Kvar unleashed a laugh the likes she had never heard before. "You can do nothing, you inferior being. They will die and you will return with me and give your life for my Angelus Project. It is all your fault that they are to die, had they no relation to you they would live."

And he raised his sword.

"Kratos, Lloyd run!" Both did nothing save stare at her as Kvar struck both down at once. They both collapsed and blood coursed from their bodies.

Anna screamed.

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Anna's eyes flew open in a panic and she fully expected to find the bodies of those she held most dear to her. But confusion quickly replaced panic when she saw nothing save the metallic ceiling of a darkened room and felt nothing but a soft bed beneath her and warmth brought on by blankets of a tight weave.

"You are awake," came a deep voice that Anna had come to know intimately. She turned to where the voice originated and stared in awe at Kratos, alive and well.

"You're okay," she said in amazement as she noted that he suffered from no wound.

"Is that not what I am to say to you?"

"How can you say that? I hurt you. I thought you were Kvar and ran my sword through you. And Kvar, he--he killed you…and Lloyd too 'cause of me. I saw your blood all around. It was everywhere. I saw you die. And your eyes," She looked at his brown eyes as if making sure that they were true, "…your eyes were all red--"

"That didn't happen, Anna," His hand came to hers which silenced her words more then his could, "It must be disorienting to you because you came so close to death but what you were describing was merely a dream. It was I that almost killed you, you did nothing wrong."

Memories of the nightmare and reality commingled and she tried hard to distinguish between the two. But the memories of the night of such pain and torment crashed through her mind like a storm, those memories were vivid, unlike the haze-like atmosphere of the nightmare.

"You're right, I remember it now," the memories of terror flew through her mind, "I turned into a monster and I…I couldn't control myself and I…I tried to kill Lloyd. And Noishe, he protected Lloyd, but I dunno what happened to him after I…I attacked him. I didn't kill him, did I?"

"Do not concern yourself of Noishe, he has been alive longer then I. I'm certain that he found a way to survive," he said, his eyes soft with concern.

"You sure about that? I mean I remember it so clearly…I must've killed him," Anna was not blind enough to believe the words that Kratos uttered. He was trying to ease her troubled mind.

"You did nothing wrong, you couldn't control yourself. There's no proof that he's dead, perhaps it would be best to believe Noishe to be alive. He may be with Lloyd right now."

"Lloyd! Where's Lloyd?" Anna said, attempting to rise. Pain split in her belly and she collapsed back onto the bed.

"Be careful, Anna, your wounds have not yet healed," Kratos' eyes were wide with concern.

"I don't care about that, what about Lloyd! Where is he?"

Kratos was hesitant to respond. "With that dwarf, I would imagine."

"But--but you promised you'd find Lloyd. He should be with us, he's probably so scared right now."

"I promised I'd search for Lloyd after you died," he said the last word softly, "You are far from dead."

"If I told you that the Angelus Project Exsphere was with Lloyd, would you go then?" Anna knew that this was cruel to bring the Angelus Project up, but she was blinded by anger.

"This is no time to joke, Anna."

"Who's joking? I gave that damned exsphere to the dwarf along with Lloyd. I was sure that I was gonna die and I didn't want Kvar to get his hands on it."

Kratos smiled wryly. "A good idea."

"Well why don't you go get Lloyd now. I don't mind being left alone for a bit," at his strained expression she added, "I can be left alone for a little while. Its not like I'm gonna die or anything."

"No. I refuse to leave you alone here."

"But why? I'm not gonna break if you leave me for a day or so. I mean, we are in an inn, right? They're completely safe."

"An inn?" Kratos let out a hollow laugh, "We are far from any inn in Slyvarant, Anna, if we were there is no doubt in my mind that you would be dead. An inn does not have adequate healing facilities that would have helped you. Under ordinary circumstances you would have died that night."

"Then what was so unordinary that happened? How come I'm alive right now?" Anna heard anger and panic rise in her voice and Kratos' face held no emotion. It was a mask that Anna knew all too well, "Tell me what happened, Kratos, you don't have to shield me from anything."

"There is no need to panic, Anna, everything is fine."

"That's a lie and you know it. Everything isn't fine, if everything was fine you'd tell me what happened. How come I'm alive right now? Why aren't you getting Lloyd? Where are we?" Anna glared at him as she bombarded him with questions, "Don't I have a right to know?"

Kratos stared at her incredulously. "I suppose it is something that I would not have been able to keep from you for long."

"Talk to me, Kratos."

"Very well. Yggdrasill appeared before me soon after you lost consciousness beneath the cliff. I was frightened, Anna, I thought I was going to lose you. When he offered to allow the healers on Derris-Kharlan to save you, I accepted the offer and ascended to Derris-Kharlan. The repercussions of my actions don't bother me. Even if you grow to despise me for what I have done, as long as you are alive, I am content."

"What do you mean 'grow to despise you'? I can't hate you, I thought you would've known that by now. Even if we're on Derris-Kharlan," Anna hid her fear of being on that dreaded place from him, "and you owe Yggdrasill, I don't care."

He sighed. "I don't believe you know the full extent of the situation. We will be imprisoned on Derris-Kharlan, unable to leave."

"What, you mean we can't leave? Can't we just escape and run from them?"

"I am afraid it is not that simple. I am the Origin's Seal, Anna, and now that I am finally within Yggdrasill's grasp he will not allow me to escape for the power of Cruxis is strong. Although I would wish for you not to have to share my fate I doubt that Yggdrasill would allow you to leave."

Anna stared at him, unable to respond, fear and hopelessness coursing through her being as she waited for him to continue. So this was why Kratos had been so hesitant to tell her, it made sense now. And she knew now she had to prove to him that she could handle it. She wouldn't let him carry any more guilt because of this. Kratos gazed at her through his concerned brown eyes, but there was a hint of apprehension in them.

"There's more, isn't there?"

"Yes. It is just that…I will be unable to continue working against Yggdrasill and his vision of The Age of Lifeless Beings. I will be unable to work towards uniting the worlds as well because," he hesitated and Anna waited, he then whispered, "…because of you. I know that he will use your life and well-being as a threat against me if he suspects me of defying his wishes."

"So what? That doesn't mean that we can just forget about everything we've been working towards for the past few years. Besides, this is a perfect opportunity. We can destroy Cruxis from the inside."

"No," Kratos said, his voice much louder then before, "We cannot, under any circumstances, do such a thing. Imagine what Yggdrasill would do to you if he discovered we were attempting to destroy his organization."

"He doesn't have to find out," by his look of indignation she corrected herself, "Okay, okay, so he would probably find out. But so what? We can't just watch as the worlds continue that useless struggle for mana and people keep on dying 'cause those damned exespheres suck the life out of them. And what about discrimination? Didn't you tell me once that you wanted all that to end?"

"We are in no position to end discrimination or save the world from all of the woes that plague it. This is not a fairy tale," Kratos hissed and Anna stared at him, a response dying on her tongue. He had never seen him look so angry in her life, "We are imprisoned on Derris-Kharlan and I will not allow my misguided ideals to lead you to your death as it almost did. I will not fail to protect you again, you must live."

"So that's it, isn't it? Your just gonna stand by and watch as Yggdrasill turns everyone into a lifeless being."

"So it would seem," Kratos was drawing into himself and Anna couldn't care less. Why should she? He just said that he was just going to let everything she hated to continue. She knew that without Kratos' aid she could not act on her own. He would figure it out and stop her before she ever started.

"That's so selfish! You're not gonna do anything just 'cause of me. There's more people out there then just you that are suffering right now and hoping that someone they love isn't gonna die. You know, I wish I never survived that fall. Maybe then you'd actually do something."

"I doubt that, Anna," he said, hurt radiating from his voice, "When I saw you slipping away from me, I felt everything that seemed important to me become meaningless. Whether you survived or died then, it wouldn't have made a difference. All that matters to me now is that you are alive, even if you grow to despise me. I suppose it is yet another sin among my innumerable ones."

"Humph," Anna said unconsciously mimicking Kratos, anger coursing through her being and she turned her eyes away from his. She just realized that his hand still held hers and she wrenched it out of his grasp. What a stubborn fool.

"What of Lloyd?" Kratos said finally breaking the silence. At the name of her son, Anna turned her eyes to look up at him, confused, "If you wish I could descend upon Sylvarant. We could go together after you recover from your injuries. You need not be separated from--"

"No," Anna said all too quickly, "I don't want Lloyd to come here."

Kratos' eyes stared at her, bewildered.

"Derris-Kharlan is no place for a child to grow up. From what you told me about it, it sounds like a horrible place. Its filled with lifeless angels and then there's Yggdrasill too…I want to keep Lloyd far away from that guy. I…I really want Lloyd be with us, more then anything but," She felt emotion rise in her voice, "He'd be happier without me. Without us. He'd be so much better off in Sylvarant with that dwarf raising him. The dwarf…he told me that he'd take care of Lloyd for me. I dunno why, but I believe him."

"Dwarves are known for their honesty," Kratos murmured absently.

"That's right, they are. Then that means that Lloyd will get to live a happy and peaceful life. He'll get to make friends and go to school and live normally. And he won't have to get mixed up in this Cruxis business too, he can be happy."

"You're right," Kratos said incredulously, his eyes widened in shock, "I am loathe to allow a dwarf to raise my son however the life we could give him is insubstantial. He would lose his innocence, of that I am sure. And Yggdrasill would no doubt use Lloyd's life against me as well. He will be safer and happier."

"At least that's something we both agree on."

"Indeed. We should not speak of Lloyd like this when in front of any lifeless being or Yggdrasill, naturally. If any ask what had become of our son…we should say that he is dead."

"Dead," Anna repeated and she felt a wave of remorse flood her system, "I guess I'll never get to see him grow up. He'll probably forget about us too."

"In all likelihood."

Anna sighed and allowed her eyes to slip closed and drown her surroundings in darkness. She felt the remorse wash over her more of everything that happened so quickly and she was all too aware of the remorse that Kratos was feeling as well. As much as she tried to push his feelings aside, she couldn't. She ached to comfort him. I really do love him…don't I? Even if he's not gonna do anything to help the worlds I still care.

"I don't hate you, you know," Anna said with her eyes still closed, "even if you are acting like a moron, I'm not gonna forgive you. But…I don't hate you."

Kratos did not voice a response but she felt his warm hands grasp her own and that was all the response that she needed. She felt herself drift off to sleep and no nightmares of Kvar plagued her slumber.


	3. Inaction

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia or any of the characters._

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_Inaction_

Anna sighed and shifted her eyes to the mahogany table in front of her as her mind drifted away from the report on Thethe'alla's current state that Yuan was currently stating to her the details of.

Seventeen. Lloyd was seventeen now. It was almost hard to believe, it didn't feel that long ago that she was holding a baby in her arms but she knew that time had passed. He was almost grown up now, she probably would not even recognize him if they met again. Perhaps he looked like Anna's father from the faded memories that she had of him. Or perhaps he looked like Kratos. No matter what he looked like she knew that he was happy right now, with a life of his own that she couldn't be a part of. Anna leaned back in the plush velvet chair that she was sitting in and fiddled with the silver locket about her neck absently.

"Anna are you even listening to me?" Anna's eyes flew to his grey-blue ones, brought back to reality by the sound of her name.

"Not a word," she said, deciding that the blunt approach was necessary. She knew that it was obvious that she wasn't paying attention and she also knew that her attending meetings such as this was a mere formality. She had no say in anything that went on, it was all to keep her busy.

"Then perhaps you should leave. I don't have the time to waste my words on deaf ears."

"Yeah, you know, you're right. I should leave," Anna's voice was laced with the anger of fourteen long years of inaction, "I don't have the time to waste on being with someone prattling about the details of the suffering and deaths of countless innocent lives while I'm sitting here doing nothing."

Anna abruptly rose from her chair, the logic that normally prevented her temper from flaring in front of Yuan or any member of Cruxis had disappeared. She didn't care that Yuan would tell Yggdrasill of what she just said. She didn't care about any of it. She was just a pawn to make sure that her husband remained inactive, her thoughts didn't matter to the great leader of Cruxis. Anna moved in quick strides across the metallic floor of the room towards the door.

"You're dissatisfied with Cruxis' methods as well."

As well? Shock replaced the anger that had coursed through Anna and her movements stilled just as she had stepped through the doorway. She turned slowly towards Yuan whose features retained that calculating mask and she stepped back inside his office, curious as to what the unordinary conversation she may have with him.

"Yeah, I am. I've always hated what Cruxis is doing," she strode back to the chair she was sitting in and sat down, straight across from Yuan, "You don't like what's going on either?"

Yuan remained silent, staring at her with a mask similar to the one that Kratos donned on occasion.

"Does Kratos know of your thoughts on this matter?"

"What do you think I've been telling him the past fourteen years? I should know by now that he's not going to do anything to reunite the worlds and stop the stupid struggle for mana or the Age of Lifeless Beings," Anna paused and thought for a few moments, "But he hasn't been doing absolutely nothing. He has been helping to decrease the death tolls in the human ranches, I even saw the figures, its been working. And…he's been trying to keep the amount of people imprisoned to a minimum and the attacks on towns and villages down too."

"Do you truly believe that doing those things makes up for all the terror that Cruxis has created? Those that are alive now will not be for long if Yggdrasill has his way and creates the Age of Lifeless Beings."

"No, of course not. But at least its something," Anna felt the anger remerge inside herself and that suited her just fine. She was tired of being complacent, "What are you doing, anyways?"

"More then you know."

"Oh yeah, like knowing that everything that Cruxis does is wrong yet taking no action against it. That's so much more then what I'm doing."

Yuan glared at her venomously and Anna matched his glare with one of her own. Yuan collected himself after a time and that calculating mask was on his face again although traces of anger were still inside the depths of his blue-grey eyes.

"Would you be inclined to descend upon the worlds to a ranch to see first hand the damage that Cruxis has wrought?"

"What?" That was the last thing that Anna was expecting to hear.

"Maybe seeing the destruction with your own eyes would let you see the urgency of the situation."

Anna looked at him and suspicion rose in her. Why would Yuan ask that, now of all times? Seeing the horror of the human ranches was something she had no desire to relive, she need only look back to her memories to know what went on there. But what she desired and what she should do clashed. If Yuan really wanted to act maybe she could finally do something to help him.

"I…I might just take you up on that."

"Good. I'll contact you later on the matter," It had a note of finality and Anna rose to leave, she had the conversation to think of, "Oh and Anna? Don't tell Kratos about this. I doubt he would let you go if he knew."

"R-right," Anna said as she walked across the office to leave it. there was something about the way he said that that just didn't sound right to her.

What was all that about? Anna thought as she walked across the familiar corridors of Derris-Kharlan that she had grown to despise, Does it really matter? If Yuan wants to do something then maybe I can help somehow. Its better then doing nothing. And its not like he'd try anything, I'm the insurance that Kratos does nothing.

Anna heard footsteps and soon after an angel appeared, his lifeless black eyes boring into her own, the skin of his face so pale that it had probably never seen the light of the sun. She looked away and walked faster to get away from him. That stare, it was one that she had seen all too often ever since she came to dwell in Derris-Kharlan and she despised it.

Everyone is going to turn into one of those things, she shuddered at the thought. Those angels felt as a constant reminder of what she was failing to do; to convince Kratos to act. No matter how much she researched in Cruxis' library and how many facts she gave him as to how to reunite the worlds he admonished them. Didn't he see those angels too? Didn't he feel that no one deserved to turn into one of them? Maybe he's happy as long as I don't turn into one.

Anna shook her head at the thought and instead of taking the corridor that would lead her to her quarters and the inevitable meeting with her husband, she took a turn instead down a path that she knew would be virtually deserted. She hated what Kratos was reduced to and no matter how many times she had tried to convince him to act he refused, never voicing the undeniable reason that was understood between both of them as to why he would not act.

And he never even tried to stop me getting this thing… Anna;s movements stilled and stared at the dark red Cruxis Crystal that was imbedded in the skin of her hand, surrounded by elaborate carvings of a Dwarvan charm that she knew was the key crest. She lent against the cool metallic wall and felt despair crash over her as she saw it glint in the dim lighting of the corridor, I wonder who had to die to make it.

All Anna wanted to do was to tear the stone from her skin and throw it away. But she knew that in so doing it would accomplish nothing and only make her feel as a childish fool. Someone had suffered, just as she did, to create it and throwing it away would be like throwing away the chances that the person had to do something, to change why the person died. She knew that if she had died that fateful night fourteen years ago that would be her desire as well. But she wasn't given the Crystal to rebel against Mithos, rather to make sure that Kratos would forever remain inactive as her life was suspended eternally. To make sure that the suffering of countless lives continued.

Anna leaned her head back and willed the tears to form and fall at the hopelessness of the situation. But she couldn't. She hit the wall from behind with her fist, hearing the loud thud resonate throughout the corridor. She couldn't shed a single tear. How pathetic.

No, I can't keep on thinking like that, she chastised herself. Although she thought the words she was starting to doubt their meaning. After fourteen years she had succeeded in doing nothing, convincing Kratos to do nothing. She stared down yet again at the stone embedded in her hand, If I give in then I'd be betraying the person who gave their life for the damned Cruxis Crystal. I'd be betraying Lloyd too. I'd be betraying everybody.

With that thought she started to walk to her and Kratos' quarters at a steady pace, determination struggling with the despair that had become a constant to her. She cast the waves of emotions that roiled inside of herself away from her mind, letting them get as far away as her mind as possible. If she appeared depressed she knew that Kratos would accredit her ideals to a fragile emotional state brought on by the endless years of hopelessness on Derris-Kharlan.

I guess that's why Kratos seems so unemotional when he want to get his point across, she thought with a bitter smile as she came in front of the door of their quarters, I always wondered why Kratos acted like that. And look at me now, doing exactly the same thing.

Anna took a deep breath as a final preparation to steel herself for the argument and opened the door.

"Kratos?" She peered into the dimly lit room and entered it, closing the door behind her and looking about the room seeing the furniture cast their shadows across the floor but not one of a man, "Are you here?"

"Anna," came a deep baritone voice laced with suppressed irritation that came from another room in their quarters. Anna turned towards it and walked towards the room only seeing that Kratos did the same thing which made them meet in the middle of the room, "I believe that we need to have a discussion."

"My thoughts exactly."

"I won't ask how you came across such books, they were supposed to be hidden from you," he brought his hand up that was clutching one of such books, probably one of the many that Anna took to read from Cruxis' immense library, and her gaze shifted to it reading the title.

"It's an old book about Summon Spirits. I thought that the author's theories were quite insightful," he rose his other hand which held another book, "and that one's about magic usage. It actually has an interesting section on the magic that Summon Spirit's have and--"

"It has a large section on pact making as well," Kratos said, his voice hardened, Anna drew her eyes to his matching his gaze, "These books are meant for select members of Cruxis only."

"Yeah, it does have a large section on pact making," Anna said ignoring the previous statement. She had to keep her temper in check, "And do you know the theories that each of them agree on? That if a pact-maker breaks the vow that he pledged to the Summon Spirit that--"

"I am fully aware of what is possible, I have read these books as well."

"So then it could be true," Anna felt hope swell inside of herself, then she diminished it, she had to remember to think clearly, "then that means that those theories have a chance to be right. If new pacts can be formed with each--"

"You are not a summoner, Anna. And even if you were you could not descend upon the worlds to form the pacts."

"I know that, we'd just have to find someone with the gift to summon and convince them to make the pacts. It'd be difficult, but it'd be worth it. And if we can form pacts with each Summon Spirit we can decrease Yggdrasill's power and eventually--"

"No. You fail to realize that Yggdrasill would realize what we would be doing before it could be completed and that it this theory has not been proven. Are you willing to risk your life on a mere possibility?"

"It's more then just a 'mere possibility'," she mimicked his deep baritone voice for those two words and his frown deepened, "I really think that this is possible. I mean, just think about how those Summon Spirits would feel after four thousand years being bound to a man that's broken his pact," he opened his mouth to voice a response but Anna stopped him, "Don't even say it. You and I both know that Yggdrasill has broken his pact with each one."

"We will fail."

"How can you be so sure?"

"The task is too immense for us do alone and keep from Yggdrasill's knowledge."

"You never used to think so. Remember all those years we spent searching for a way to reunite the worlds running from Cruxis? You thought we could stop him."

"I was naïve," Kratos said with a bitterness in his voice that Anna wasn't used to, "I thought that I could stop everything that was wrong with the world and atone for mine and Yggdrasill's sins. You gave me hope that it could all end one day. I was a fool. I never should have allowed your foolish ideals to cloud my mind to the harsh reality of the world. As much as I wish for the futile struggle for mana to halt and for none to suffer the same fate as you did at the ranch I know that it can never be.

"The way of the world is not one of light as you believe it should be, Anna," his eyes bore into her own and Anna stood entranced by his speech. He had never said any of this before, not one word. Maybe he wanted to shield her from how his ideals changed throughout the years, "Nor will the needless death and destruction cease, no matter what you or I will do. Nothing can be done about Cruxis and the eventual Age of Lifeless Beings, Yggdrasill cannot be stopped. Acting against him will only lead you to your death and Yggdrasill's twisted vision of the world would come to pass regardless of what I do. I won't try to bring to life fantasies that can never exist in reality any longer."

All Anna could do was stare at him, her eyes wide with disbelief.

"You can't really believe all that…can you?" Kratos' smile was grim as he nodded, "What happened to you?"

"I changed. I suppose my outlook began to change when I almost lost you and Lloyd. I realized that when I thought it would be impossible to lose either of you two it was more then likely. That was a dose of reality that I needed. Even if I can never see Lloyd again knowing that he is alive and well is enough to ease my mind. I am grateful that you didn't die that night, either. At least then I can still see that the world is not entirely dark. You are as stubborn as ever, those old hopes still alive in you."

Anna shook her head and backed away as Kratos dropped the books, those small hopes that she had salvaged in the lifeless prison, and reached out his arms for her. This was not the same man that she had fallen in love with.

"I can't believe this. Why can't you see that all this is wrong?"

"But I do, Anna, truly I do. You continue to remind me of the evil of Cruxis. I also know that there is nothing either of us can do to stop it. All we would succeed in doing if we rebelled against Yggdrasill is provide him with an excuse to kill you. If I can protect the last shred of light in my life, I will."

Anna looked up at him, and she froze on the spot. Why was he making this so hard? Why was he making it so hard to hate him? It'd be so much easier if he just acted like those normal villains in the stories she read when she was too tired to think of the problems that life on Derris-Kharlan wrought. If he just acted like those sadistic villains that didn't care about human life, it'd be so much easier. But she couldn't split the world into black and white when it so clearly was not that simple. She felt warm arms around her before she even realized that Kratos had drawn close enough to do so. Anna's heart was torn and if she could cry then she knew she would have.

"Do you hate me?"

"I…I don't know," she responded before she could think of what she should have said. If she had said 'yes' then maybe he would do something but she could not think straight anymore.

"Do you love me?" He asked, his voice but a whisper.

"I…don't know," There was a time when there would be no hesitation that she loved him. But that time was in the past.

"Then I am lucky," he murmured, bringing a hand to stroke her hair, "Any normal person would have grown to despise me by this point."

"What, are you saying that I'm not normal?"

"Perhaps," his voice was dry now and Anna knew exactly what he was trying to do. He was trying to cheer her up.

Despite of all she knew that she was supposed to do and of all of the things she knew she was supposed to say, she lifted her head and gave him a smile. His eyes looked astounded before he returned the smile.

"I've missed that."

"Missed what?"

"These past few years haven't been easy on you, I know," his smile faded and Anna narrowed her eyes. He ignored her question entirely, "But perhaps something could change that."

"What are you trying to say?"

"Are you aware of the Journey of Regeneration?"

"Of course I am, everyone knows about that," Anna replied flatly, "But what does that have to do with anything?"

"By Yggdrasill's order I am to accompany Sylvarant's Chosen of Mana on her Journey of Regeneration. He is rather displeased at Sylvarant's failure to produce a successful vessel and he decided it best to have me protect this Chosen so that she does not fail. I requested for you to accompany me and he has agreed."

"What?" Anna broke the embrace and backed away from him, her eyes wide with disbelief, "You can't be serious. You don't expect me to help lead a girl to die because of Yggdrasill's obsessive--"

"It is all that we are able to do. Sylvarant has been the waning world for far too long. Imagine what another few decades would do to the remaining mana supply. If we reverse the effects for it to flourish then at least it will lessen the people of Sylvarant's suffering."

"But what about Thethe'alla's people? And what if this girl is actually a compatible vessel for Martel. Wouldn't that mean that after the Age of Lifeless Beings is going to happen?"

"I doubt it. The chances of the current Chosen to become a suitable vessel are infinitesimal. It has been four thousand years and Martel has not been resurrected."

"But what if she actually is the right match? Then we'd have to--"

"Nothing can be done to stop Martel's resurrection or the Age of Lifeless Beings. Anything that we could potentially do would simply prolong the inevitable."

Anna stared, dumbfounded at Kratos' resolve. There would be no arguing with him, not now. He really had succumb to the hopelessness over the years and nothing she could say would change that. The man she fell in love with didn't exist anymore, did he? She sighed and looked away from him, moving towards the books strewn upon the metallic floor that he had so callously dropped. She knelt down and took the one that focussed on Summon Spirits in her trembling hands. It was taking all she had not to succumb to the hopelessness as well and to admit to the truth that Kratos had told her. The world was not as it should be, it was a dark and violent place. Maybe there really was nothing she could do Maybe it wasn't worth working towards a dream that could never happen.

She heard the clinking of a metal chain and she dropped the book, her attention shifting to the necklace that she always had about her neck. She opened the locket and looked at the picture that was of so long ago, her eyes fixated not on her or Kratos but of their son.

No, it was definitely something worth working towards. She had to remember that.


	4. Deception

_Disclaimer: I still don't own Tales of Symphonia._

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_Deception_

The sun was high in the pale blue skies of Sylvarant and its light illuminated the countryside so that all was vivid and bright. It will not be long now before I begin the Journey of Regeneration, Kratos thought as he walked across a weatherworn dirt path that was surrounded by fields of dry grass which swayed in time to a gentle breeze. He could even see the temple now, its grey outline becoming more pronounced in the horizon with each passing step that he took. Yet he was apprehensive not of the violent tasks that his orders would drive him to accomplish but of the effects that this journey would have on his wife.

His gaze shifted from the temple outline to Anna who kept a steady pace by his side. Although she had not aged in over a decade her features did not remain as unchanging and as youthful as his memories of her held. They had become worn with the worries that life on Derris-Kharlan had wrought and although she was now in Sylvarant her eyes did not glow with the joy he had known them to have in the past but rather retained a melancholy of recent years. It was no secret to him that Anna was extremely bitter about accompanying him on the Journey of Regeneration, that much she had made clear enough in the arguments between them before descending upon Sylvarant. She never gave up, even to the bitter end. He did not object to the silence that had settled between them but it was disheartening to see her melancholic expression continue as she was surrounded by the world that he had known her to love.

"You look rather beautiful today," Kratos said. She had always smiled whenever he called her that in the past.

"Huh?" Her brown eyes lifted to his in confusion, "Where'd that come from?"

"I was merely making an observation."

"I see," she said, her eyes retaining that same melancholy and no smile graced her lips, "Its been a long time since you told me that, you know."

"So it has, and yet I think it more often then that. Perhaps it is the beautiful day that caused me to make such an observation."

"Yeah, I guess it is a nice day," Anna said absently, and her eyes held no joy from what he had known her to love. She used to appreciate days such as this, telling him that it reminded her of all that she had missed when she was incarcerated.

"Perhaps I should compliment you more often," he tried again, "I suppose it has slipped my mind in recent years."

"You can if you really want to," she said as her eyes moved from his back to where they were resting before he had spoken and a silence settled between the two again. Kratos frowned. Her features still retained that melancholic expression, his comment did not have the desired effect. She had no interest in having a conversation with him, still bitter about accompanying him on the Journey of Regeneration and of all the years of inaction. Perhaps a more direct approach was necessary.

"Would you rather me call you ugly?"

"What did you just say?" her voice was raised and her eyes flashed to his in anger, "You're calling me ugly?"

"Not at all. I simply thought that you would prefer it if I called you ugly."

"Why would you think something like that? No woman wants to be called ugly."

"I suppose not, but I am constantly surprised when I am with you. I called you beautiful earlier and it did not illicit a positive response so I merely assumed that you perceived yourself to be ugly now. Perhaps life on Derris-Kharlan has addled your mind."

"Of course I don't think that I'm ugly. Just because I'm not falling all over myself when you call me beautiful doesn't mean that I've suddenly lost all self-confidence in myself."

"I recall when I called you beautiful for the first time," Kratos' lips ghosted a smile at the memory, "You were certainly 'falling all over yourself' then."

"Do you know how long ago that--" Anna stopped herself, as if an internal revelation occurred and the anger that filled her eyes dissipated into ones filled with a mixture of annoyance and amusement, "Oh, I get it now. Very funny."

"I thought so," Kratos said, feeling a triumph at the melancholy that had been lifted from Anna's features, "Although I cannot fully understand your reaction. If I were to receive such a compliment from you, I would take it with grace."

"I would hardly call ugly a compliment."

"I never called you ugly, I merely asked you if you wished me to call you ugly. If anything I insinuated that you were beautiful."

"That's some strange logic you're using there," Anna said and then her eyes took a mocking glint, "You know what, you look rather beautiful today too."

"What?" Kratos felt shock and disgust roil through him at the comment, "That is not what--"

"Funny. I thought you said that you'd take it with grace," Anna had a rare smile play on her lips and Kratos smiled back at her, elation at her smile. He recalled the days that Anna had adored displays of affection, they had always proven to lighten her mood despite the circumstances.

"Then I suppose that is something that I need to correct."

Kratos said wrapped an arm about her waist, her expression became unreadable as her movements stilled at his touch. Perhaps it was time to repeat such displays. He drew her closer and wrapped both arms about her, pulling her into his embrace and she did nothing to resist. Her warmth enveloped him. No thoughts flooded his mind of his duties or his sins as her presence intoxicated him completely. With the strength of his arms he tightened his hold on her and lifted her from her feet feeling her familiar weight against himself entirely. Her breath was soft and warm against his skin as he leaned towards her and captured her lips in a gentle kiss. Her taste, her warmth, her very presence was all consuming.

But it ended all too soon.

"J--just what do you think you're doing?" Anna said, panic lacing her voice as Kratos felt her lips tear from his and her body stiffen in his embrace.

"Is it not obvious?" Kratos said, fighting with the disappointment that surged through his being as he tried to comfort her again and buried his head on her neck, pressing his lips gently against the soft skin that lay there.

"Stop it!" Kratos' eyes widened as bewilderment flooded his system. She used to love it when he caressed that area.

"What is wrong?" He asked hesitantly as he rose his head from her neck waiting for her to respond, noting her eyes were avoiding contact with his. That was unlike her, normally she met his gaze without apprehension.

"I…I don't know," her voice held shock, "I just don't want you doing that anymore, okay?"

"But why, Anna? Do you not enjoy it when I do such things?"

"Yeah, I used to like it. I used to like it a lot. But right now I don't. I just--I don't."

"Why?" He repeated softly, already knowing the answer. Her eyes did not meet his own and she remained silent, "Must my sins taint every moment I have with you?"

"Yes," Kratos felt further disappointment flood his system. Her eyes came to his and buried within those emotive brown depths was an emotional pain that he had never seen her possess. Was she truly hiding this pain, all this time? He failed her in the end, "I don't wanna lie to you, Kratos. I don't know what to feel anymore, I don't know what to do anymore. You stopped atoning for your sins when you said you never would and no matter what I do you won't do anything to keep your promise. You broke that promise and I…I just don't know what to think of you anymore."

As Kratos gazed into her emotive brown eyes Kratos knew that there was nothing that he could say or do that could make her pain dissipate. He had failed her and he knew that he would never see joy alight her features again. The thought of her eternal despair that she would suffer if she remained by his side riddled his own soul with despair, a despair greater then the thought of her life being torn from his own. He would not be selfish any longer.

"You can let me go now," the sound of Anna's gentle voice brought him from his thoughts and he nodded, lowering her feet firmly to the ground before releasing her from his embrace.

"Forgive me, Anna, I merely wished to enjoy your company," For our time together grows short. He did not voice his thoughts, he had no desire to cause her unnecessary anguish. She had suffered enough, "I did not realize that you would react in such a way."

"Me either," Anna said, smiling while her eyes shone in despair, "I guess I--"

A bright flash of light cut Anna's response as she turned her gaze towards the light. He slowly brought his gaze from Anna towards the temple's grey outline where the Oracle's vibrant light shone above the building.

"I guess we'd better go now," Anna said softly.

Kratos did not voice a response as he watched her turn from him and continue her journey towards the temple light. Kratos remained immobile, staring at her from behind without any thoughts entering his mind before following her pace as thoughts of the previous events mulled through his mind. Those same events solidified his resolve of what must be done.

The sound of steel clashing steel and cries inherent of a battle caught Kratos' ears as he approached the haphazard temple stairway and drew him out of his thoughts. He had not expected the Renegades to make such haste in their attempt at killing the Chosen. His stance stiffened as he mentally prepared himself for the ensuing battle.

"Be on your guard," Kratos said pausing, his gaze shifting from the haphazard stairway to Anna, "The Renegades have made progress in their attempt to assassinate the Chosen."

Anna nodded, her eyes hardening in preparation for the battle to come. He felt pride of her at her mature reaction as he mounted the wooden steps, hearing her soft steps follow him. There was a time, long ago, when she had no idea how to correctly handle a battle and also a time where she could not wield a sword. He had taught her well, he knew, and there would be no concern in him of her during the battle to come. He mounted the final step and had no time to fully take in the situation as he would have preferred.

All he saw was the glint of metal in the sunlight of a weapon that descended upon a boy whose features he had no time to take in. And his instincts took over. In quick movements he unsheathed his sword lunged forwards towards where the weapon would have descended and deflected the attack, sending the man that delivered it careening in the opposite direction with all the strength Kratos could muster. It was meant as a killing blow, he gathered.

"Who are you guys?" Came a voice from behind him and Kratos whipped around, feeling suppressed rage at his seemingly carefree reaction. What a foolish boy. Had he no idea how close he came to death?

"Get out of the way," he hissed, before turning back towards the enemy that he knew he had to dispose of. He had no time to deal with children.

Anna was keeping the enemy distracted and was feinting between the gargantuan man's slow attacks with an axe meant more for practical use then for battle. Why the Renegades had sent such a slow and ill-equipped opponent he would never know. But that did not matter in that moment and he pushed all thoughts aside but of the battle.

Adrenaline rushed through his system as he rushed the enemy, striking the man easily with a blow across his unprotected back. Blood coursed from the wound and the man faltered, unable to bring his axe for another easily avoidable attack. Kratos quickly took advantage of this lapse of composure and brought his sword across for another blow. And another. And another. Finally he thrust his sword inside the man's chest in a final blow meant to kill. He drew his sword from the man's body and watched as the man wavered for a few moments and collapsed, blood coursing from his body in rivulets mingling with the dirt of the ground.

"I never thought you'd show up," came a deep voice and Kratos' gaze shifted to the man that had spoken. His features were utterly forgettable, "Damn…retreat for now."

With the orders from what Kratos assumed to be the Renegade leader of the mission to assassinate the Chosen, he placidly watched as the various Renegade soldiers ran towards the temple stairway to make their escape. He did not pursue them, it mattered not where the Renegades went, and he did not feel a great need to shed blood needlessly as long as they were not in his way.

"Did you really have to kill him?" Came a young feminine voice and Kratos turned behind himself where three children resided appearing dishevelled from their brush with death. He noted that the other two held similar expressions of horror.

"Yes, it was necessary. If I did not kill him, he would not hesitate in killing me or any of you."

"But still…" The girl said, unable to say more, her face ashen from what Kratos assumed was the death of the enemy that she had just witnessed.

"H-he's right Colette. I mean, he was a Desian, and they're the ones that cause everyone to suffer. He deserved to die," this comment came from the one whom Kratos recognized as the boy that he had protected. Despite the boy's words, his voice sounded unsure and he looked visibly shaken, his wide youthful eyes staring beyond Kratos to the bloodied corpse.

"Just because he's a half-elf, he deserves to die?" Came a younger boy's voice, this comment was softer then the others.

"The world is a cruel place, where one must make the difficult decisions of killing or being killed, regardless whether or not they are a Desian. The Chosen's Journey of Regeneration will undoubtedly be riddled with such decisions to kill. If you do not like it then perhaps you should not have came to a place of such danger."

"And just what is that supposed to mean? I can handle myself just fine against an enemy."

"Then I suppose that if we did not appear you would have came from the situation unscathed," Kratos truly hated the brazenness and utter ignorance that this boy was displaying that was typical of youth. He felt that this experience created a further dislike of children then he already had, his son was the only exception to this almost universal rule.

"Kratos," Anna's voice was hardened, and he noticed finally that she was by his side, "They're just children. There's no need to be so harsh with them."

Kratos gazed at her and sighed. He had forgotten himself, these children had led sheltered lives, there was no need to jolt themselves from their deluded reality, "I suppose you are right."

"I'm sorry, kids. Kratos just isn't used to being around people," he narrowed his eyes and turned to her, she met his gaze with a teasing wink, "especially people that aren't used to violence. He only means well."

"They are only children after all and I suppose they have never witnessed such an act of violence before," an elderly voice came and Kratos drew his attention to a woman that stood beside the children. His eyes narrowed, judging by her appearance she was shaken from the violence as well, otherwise he was certain she would have voiced an opinion before that time, "I cannot thank you both enough for saving the Chosen."

"So she's the Chosen?" Anna said, her voice laced with uncertainty. Kratos saw Anna from his peripheral vision and she looked thoroughly shaken as she gazed at the girl that she had only heard of until that point. Perhaps she was thinking that the girl would soon have to die to serve Yggdrasill's twisted wishes.

"That's right," said the girl, a determined look shaping her features replacing her former horrified one, "I have to go accept the Oracle. Oh, and don't worry, ma'am," the girl said, turning her innocent gaze towards Anna as if knowing of the uncertainty that set her features, "I know that I can regenerate the world so that no one has to suffer anymore. Leave it to me."

Kratos turned his gaze fully to Anna's whose face looked more ashen then the Chosen's had. Kratos paid no mind to the conversation that continued without him, his thoughts only concerning Anna.

"I know," Kratos whispered softly with words meant only for her and her angelic hearing and he moved closer to her to grasp her hand. Her brown eyes turned to his, full with a mixture of uncertainty and horror and although she did not pull away she did not voice a response or change her expression. He had failed her. Again.

"Lloyd, I would be uncertain with just you." Kratos snapped from his thoughts at the sound of his son's name and tore his eyes from Anna's to gaze at the boy whom he knew the name belonged to.

"Your name is Lloyd?" Kratos and Anna said at the same time. Hope coursed through his system. This could be his son. Their son. The son that he had not seen in fourteen years that he had thought of constantly, that he had known would be happier without him. This boy could be his boy.

"Uh, yeah, it is. But who are you to ask me my name?" Lloyd asked hesitantly, looking at them through his youthful brown eyes. Yes, Kratos could see it now. The boy had some of Anna's features. He struggled with the hope he felt inside of himself with suspicion. Perhaps this boy merely shared the same name, there was still a chance that this boy was not his. He made a mental note to investigate the boy later, "And why are you both looking at me like that?"

"Sorry, Lloyd," Anna said, "Its just that we both lost a son a long time ago that had your name. He'd probably be around your age now."

"You did?" The anger in Lloyd's voice faded as soon as it had came, "Oh. I guess I can understand too, I never knew my parents."

"You didn't? I'm sorry," Anna said and Kratos felt the hope surge to further struggle against the suspicion. He could not help but concern himself over Anna's reaction at this knowledge. Surely she would not assume this to be their son, she had no idea that they were near Iselia after all, but with Anna he could not be certain.

"I'm so sorry all of you," the Chosen said.

"Why are you sorry, you dork. Its not like its your fault we lost family."

"I--I guess so. I'm sorry."

"You don't need to--wait a minute," Lloyd said, turning his gaze towards Anna and Kratos, "Both of you lost a son? Together? At the same time? Then that means…you're married?"

"Yeah, we're married," Anna responded with a hint of smile crawling in her voice and Kratos felt relief inside himself as the emotions that came from meeting the Chosen was forgotten to her in that moment, "Is there something wrong with that?"

"Its just that, you…and him…seem so different. Why'd you marry him, anyways?"

"Why do people normally marry, Lloyd?" Anna said, and Kratos felt relief as her voice held a teasing note.

Lloyd remained silent and stared at her as if it were a trick question.

"Because they love each other!" Said the younger boy beside Lloyd, finally finding a voice after the violent incident, "Honestly, sometimes I wonder about you. How stupid can you be?"

"Shut it, Genis."

"This idle banter is pointless," Kratos said, wanting to further the task at hand, "The Chosen still needs to accept the Oracle."

"Yes, you're right," said the elderly woman, "and yet Colette needs someone to protect her from the trials that she will endure."

"I am a mercenary," Kratos said, well aware of what the woman was implying, "As is my wife. We will offer our services to you, as long as you can pay us."

"Under the circumstances, I have little choice. Please be of service, you two."

"Very well," Kratos said, squeezing Anna's hand in comfort as she remained silent. He knew that this situation must be hard on her, and yet he knew that this was the final hardship she would be forced to endure because of him, "Come, Chosen. We must enter the temple."

"Y--yes, of course Mister Kratos," the girl said as she walked towards the temple entranceway, stumbling over her own feet, "And Mrs…um, Mrs…"

"Anna," she replied with a mixture of amusement and sadness, "Just call me Anna, I never liked formalities much."

"Kratos will suffice for me as well."

"O--okay, Kratos and Anna. Then, let's go."

"Wait, Colette!" Lloyd called out, "I want to come with you."

Kratos sighed inwardly. Judging by the fact that his potential son had almost died at the hands of the Renegades, Kratos knew that he would only pose a problem if allowed to accompany them. He also felt a strange desire to keep the boy from harm rise in him.

"Lloyd, you'll only get in the way, be a good boy and wait here."

"What did you--"

"I'm sorry, Lloyd. Kratos just doesn't want you getting hurt. Its dangerous in the temple. You should stay here where its safe."

"Yeah, I know its dangerous. But I still want to come along. I'll just follow you on my own."

Kratos knew that there would be no arguing with Lloyd, and he was somehow reminded at how stubborn he had known Anna to be at times. He suppressed a smile.

"You're a stubborn kid. Very well, do as you wish."

"I'll do just that," Lloyd turned to his younger friend, "Come on, Genis, let's go."

"I figured you were going to say that."

Kratos waited as the three children walked through the temple entranceway, and smiled as they were exchanging banter amongst themselves, eyeing Lloyd all the while, elation forming in his being. Anna had been right, if this truly was their son then Lloyd had grown to become a happy young man, never having to suffer from Kratos' cursed existence.

"What are you smiling about?"

"It is nothing," Kratos said, and his grip on Anna's hand tightened as he walked inside the temple with Anna by his side. Although he knew that he should logically wish for the trial to be completed his selfish side wished for the trial to be long. For when it was completed he knew that he would be forced to act unselfishly for the first time in fourteen years.


	5. Memories

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia._

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_Memories_

Lloyd slammed the door loudly against the wooden framework of the house making a heated exit and Dirk cursed inwardly feeling anger of his own course through his being. Had he raised Lloyd to have no common sense at all? How many times had he told him to stay away from the ranch? The image of Lloyd's mother's pain-filled face flashed through his mind and Dirk walked to the table and slammed his fist against it. The woman may well have died for her son and he was so willing to throw his life away? The idiot!

Dirk walked across the wooden floor that were worn with years of use, towards the mantle where he kept the inhibitor ore. Work would help his anger to dissipate, and he knew that no matter how angry he was he had to help that person at the ranch. Now that it was within his knowledge of a person that was suffering with an exesphere without a key crest, he had to help them. He could not just deny them it just to spite his surrogate son, the same son that had no idea how important it was that he remain safe. After all, Lloyd did not hear his mother's weak pleas to save her son as Dirk did, nor the explanation of what the Desians had done to her life and the final tragic results of their pursuit. Dirk cursed the fact that there was nothing that he could have done to save that poor woman. But was she really dead?

Dirk reached to the top of the mantle and took the inhibitor ore in a clenched hand, realizing that he had stood there mulling over the memories that had burned into his mind instead of acting to help the person that was suffering. He walked in short strides towards his stone workbench, studying how best to beginning to carve the intricate charms into the ore. As he took up his tools with a practiced hand and began the work that his own father had taught him, thoughts of the mystery of the night overtook him.

After he had taken the infant Lloyd he returned to where the poor woman was, he had wanted to give Lloyd's mother the proper burial that everyone deserved, the Desians should not have robbed her of that honour. The only problem was that he could not find her body. In Dirk's mind that was a mystery unto itself, the Desians were not known to take human bodies and the idea that she was eaten by a monster was immediately ruled out, there were no remnants of her body to lead him to that conclusion. And then there were the footprints that Dirk had studied, two different sets belonging to men, and from where they stepped last it seemed as if the two men had simply vanished.

Dirk chuckled and shook his head as he continued his work. That was impossible, people could not vanish. Perhaps they had erased some of their footprints so the Desians could not follow them. Whatever had happened, Lloyd's parents may be alive or dead but a fact was that they had not returned to be a part of their son's life.

"Uh, dad?" Came Lloyd's apprehensive voice which drew Dirk from his thoughts. Dirk turned from his work to find Lloyd's body obscured by the main door which was slightly ajar.

"What is it, Lloyd?"

"These two mercenaries want to talk to you."

"At this hour, Lloyd? Send 'em away, tell them to come in the morning."

"Tomorrow will be too late as we are accompanying the Chosen on her Journey of Regeneration," came a deep baritone voice from outside the door and behind Lloyd, "I also believe that we have something to discuss which would concern you."

"Ah, alright, as long as it be brief."

Dirk put down his tools that he was using to carve the inhibitor ore and moved from the workbench, curious as to what those two mercenaries had to talk to him about. The door swung open and a tall man, one that towered over his own Dwarvan height, walked into the one roomed floor. The man looked about the room in unmasked distaste and Dirk felt a defence rise in him of his humble abode. Did a mercenary believe that he was better off then Dirk? The man's distaste was quickly hidden from his features as Dirk heard what must have been the second mercenary's movements, the footsteps upon the wooden flooring. But when the man moved to close the door he also moved to allow Dirk to see the mercenary that was hidden behind him.

It was a woman.

Dirk was expecting the second mercenary to be a man, and through all of the mutterings that his job allowed him to overhear it was virtually unheard of for a woman to take up the job of mercenary. Especially one that seemed so small in stature. As he studied her features in the flickering firelight, he felt as if there was a familiarity about her. But he cast those thoughts away, perhaps he had met her in the past. Yet there was something about her that sent himself on edge.

"If you want a weapon commissioned, I can make it," he said breaking the silence that had settled about them. He cursed inwardly, in his thoughts he had forgotten common courtesy, "I'm Dirk, a craftsman of this area"

"Kratos," the man responded curtly.

"I'm Anna."

"Anna?" Dirk looked at her more intently then before, she looked suspiciously like the memories of the dying mother with the same name that had entrusted her son to him, perhaps that was the familiarity that he had noticed.

"Is there something the matter?"

"No, nothing's the matter. Pay me no mind," Dirk said as he shook his head. That was impossible. The woman standing in front of him looked too young to have given birth to a teenager and if memory served him, Lloyd's mother had looked around the woman's age, "What was so important to discuss with me that it could not wait until morning?"

"We wished to discuss something concerning Lloyd."

"Lloyd?" Dirk felt his interest rise. He had not expected mercenaries to want to discuss Lloyd, he had assumed that it was a common request for a weapon to be commissioned, "What about the lad?"

The two exchanged glances with each other before Kratos continued, "Lloyd is human, yet he has been raised by you. Why is that?"

"That's none of your business. If you just wanted to talk about the oddity of a human raised by a dwarf we've got nothing to talk about."

"That's not what he meant by that at all," Anna said, and Dirk felt his anger dissipate as her eyes shone in sincere apology and desperation, "He didn't mean that it was strange that a dwarf raised a human. It's just that…that," her voice broke, "We lost a son a long time ago whose name was Lloyd. We lost him around the outskirts of Iselia, after a fight with the Desians and I…I gave Lloyd to a dwarf that found me when I almost died. And I thought--we both thought that maybe, just maybe that was you."

"Aye," Dirk felt shock course through his system. Of all the things to happen, he had never expected this to, "I took the lad from his mother. She…you begged me to take him, and the exesphere."

"Yes," she said with a smile, through her overwhelmed voice, "Yes, I gave you that exesphere so that Kvar wouldn't find it. He almost killed me to get it. I thought…I thought I was going to die."

"Aye, aye I remember," Dirk said in astonishment, looking at this woman that so clearly had been through so much. But her eyes and features were youthful, should she not be middle-aged by now? "But you look so young."

"I stopped aging a long time ago."

"Stopped aging? How can that be possible?"

"That is the nature of the Angelus Project. The exesphere that the Desians had been attempting to grow inside of her body must have stopped the aging process, it's my only explanation for the phenomena," Kratos said, finally entering the conversation and he moved closer to Anna, wrapping an arm about her shoulder, "It's alright Anna, it's all over now. We've found Lloyd and now you can be with Lloyd without putting him in any danger."

Dirk did not interrupt the couple as Kratos leaned towards Anna, her eyes set in a state of bewilderment, and murmured words that were not meant for him to hear. He averted his gaze from their direction, after all that they must have endured it was not his place to interrupt this most private of moments.

"Thank you. Thank you so much," Anna said, breaking the silence and Dirk turned his gaze back towards them, "You took care of Lloyd when we couldn't be there for him. I always worried about him but for some reason I knew that he was in good hands."

"Dwarven vow number two: Never abandon someone in need. It was a pleasure raising your son, I took him in like he was my own."

The sound of the door opening carelessly revealing the idle banter between two young children interrupted what either Kratos or Anna could say in response to Dirk. Lloyd's boots clomped noisily along the weatherworn wooden floors, drowning out any sound that Colette's footsteps could make. The two completely ignored the presence of the adults, making their way towards the oaken stairway.

"Lloyd," Dirk said, his words stilling the boy's actions and halting the banter, "Do you mind staying down here, there's something that you need to know about."

"Sure, dad, what do you want to tell me?"

Dirk's gaze shifted to the young girl that stood by Lloyd, "This is very important, I don't think that Colette should be hearing it as you do. Maybe it'd be best if Colette left now, you've had your visit. She does have to begin the Journey of Regeneration tomorrow, it may be best for her to rest up for it instead of staying here."

"What, no way. I want to talk to Colette before she leaves for home, it's the whole reason she came over here."

"Lloyd," Dirk said, giving the commanding father tone to his voice, "Colette should leave now."

"No, I want to talk to her."

"It's okay, Lloyd, really it is. I can leave now, I don't mind at all."

"No, Colette, you shouldn't have to leave just because he wants to tell me something. Wait a minute," Lloyd said, anger rising in his voice, "You're still mad about me going to the ranch earlier. That's what this is all about."

"That's not what this is about," Dirk said, attempting to keep his temper in check. His boy could be so daft at times, "It's your parents."

"My parents? What about my parents? Tell me!

"I will after Colette leaves for home."

"I don't care if Colette knows, I'd tell her after anyways. Hey, how come you're not telling any of them to leave?" Lloyd gestured to Kratos and Anna, who looked too stunned at the argument to intervene.

"That's because they know about your parents," Dirk said, knowing that he would win know arguments against Lloyd's stubborn nature. It would be better if the truth came from them, and not his lips. This was a moment meant to be had between the three of them.

"You know about my parents," Lloyd's attention turned to Kratos and Anna, and his anger was broken as excitement overtook him, "What about them? Are they alive now? Do you know them?"

"I know your mother," Kratos said with a slight smile, "and your father as well."

"You know my parents. You mean they're alive," excitement and hope rose in his voice, "Where are they? Can I meet them?"

"You already have," Kratos said.

"You've grown so much," Anna said, moving closer to Lloyd, and she put both of her hands on his shoulders, "I remember when I could hold you in my arms, and now you're taller then me. You look so much like your father."

"You knew me when I was a baby? Are you both friends of my mom and dad?"

Dirk chuckled despite himself, and he heard Anna and Kratos do the same. Lloyd did have a tendency

"No, not friends," Kratos said moving towards Lloyd, putting a hand on his shoulder, "We are your parents."

"You are," he sounded so shocked, as if this was something he never thought could happen, "You're my mom and dad. You're really my mom and dad."

"They're telling the truth, Lloyd" Dirk said even though Lloyd seemed to believe the strangers, Dirk did not want any doubt to cloud his mind.

"Mom," he looked at Anna, "You're my mom."

"You called me mom," Anna said with awe that made Dirk smile. She threw her arms around Lloyd before any could anticipate it, "I missed you calling me that. I missed you so much but I knew that you'd be so much better off without me. And look at you, you're okay now. You're really okay. I never thought I'd see you again, I love you so much."

"Mom…" Lloyd stood there never voicing another word, probably too shocked at the meeting of his parents. His brown eyes wide with surprise and emotions that Dirk could not imagine that must have been roiling inside of himself at the fact of his parents, once thought lost, being there by his side. Kratos put a hand on Lloyd's shoulder, never voicing any response but looking on as a proud father. Dirk looked on at the reunion feeling joy and pride for his surrogate son resonate in his being. There was no fear in him of being replaced, he had acted as Lloyd's father for many years, but now Lloyd was lucky enough to have both parents back.

"There's so much I want to know about you, so much I want to tell you," Anna said as she gave him a tight squeeze and drew back, "It's been too long. But I knew it was the right thing leaving you with the dwarf…with Dirk. He took such good care of you."

"If you don't mind me asking, why did it take both of you this long to find your son?" Dirk said, feeling confusion at this statement and the idea fleetingly came to his mind that they may have abandoned him, "If you knew he was living with me, shouldn't you have come for him right away?"

"But we couldn't--"

"Anna, it's alright," Kratos said, silencing her with his hand on her arm, "I know these past years have been hard on you. Perhaps it would be best to tell both of them what's happened, surely you don't object."

Anna was silent as she stared up at her husband. _It must be because of all that the poor woman's been through that she's looking like that_, Dirk thought as he waited for her response.

"Alright."

"I'll explain everything, don't worry," Kratos said as he placed a hand on her arm before turning towards his son, "Lloyd, you have an exesphere, do you not?"

"Uh, yeah."

"May I see it?"

And Lloyd held out the hand that his exesphere was attached to. The cloth that was normally wrapped about was not at this time for reasons Dirk had only to guess, but the full azure colour gleamed dimly in the firelight.

"Just as I suspected. That exesphere is a special one, Lloyd, it's the same one that your mother had for years. It's a product of the Angelus Project, a Desian project that your mother was a test subject of. Despite the countless host bodies that partook in the project, your mother was the only one that could create the exesphere correctly, it is why they never left us alone even after we lost you."

"They never left you alone just for an exesphere? That's so stupid!"

"That is the way of the Desians. I don't attempt to comprehend their actions."

"I was taken by the Desians when I was very young," Anna murmured, almost to herself as if she were lost in memories of her own, "I never knew what happened to my family after that."

"Mom…they really made you suffer, didn't they?"

She nodded to Lloyd absently, "But if I wasn't taken to that ranch I never would've met your father."

"That's where you met dad?"

"Yes it was. Quite the romantic place for a first encounter," Kratos said with a wry smile and with his eyes clouded in what was obvious to Dirk that he was lost in his memories, "Soon after we met we escaped from the ranch yet we could not live in peace. The Desians pursued us because of Anna's involvement with the Angelus Project, it was never safe to stay in one area for very long. We ran from place to place and when you were born with you as well. That lasted for a few years but eventually the Desians caught us when we were nearing Iselia. That's where we lost you, Lloyd--"

"I turned into a monster…" Anna murmured silently to herself, as if caught in memories of her own, "I almost killed you both."

"A monster?" Dirk and Lloyd both said in surprise.

"How can that be possible?" Dirk asked, feeling shock flood his system.

"Her exesphere was removed by a Desian. Lacking a key crest her mana went out of control and that turned her into a monster," Anna's features were shaped in one that was horrified and Kratos moved towards her wife, wrapping an arm about her waist, "It wasn't your fault what you did then, I've told you before."

She shook her head, "No, it's not that. I'm just…just thinking about what it was like being a monster. It was horrible. I never want that to happen again."

"It never will. Never. You have a key crest now and the Desians wouldn't dare to touch you again. I'll see to it that they will never bother you, you have nothing to fear."

"Kratos?" Anna said, and it was evident even to Dirk that confusion laced her voice, "Just what are you talking about?"

"Don't worry, mom," Lloyd said, ignoring what his mother had said, "I'll make sure that they'll never hurt you again too."

"Lloyd?" Anna looked at her son and smiled, her confusion wiped from her features, "Thank you. You mean you still care about me even though I haven't been there for you?"

"What are you talking about, you're my mom, of course I care about you. I know it was the Desians' fault that you couldn't come sooner, right?"

"That's right, Lloyd. During the night we lost you, I found Anna close to death after fighting the Desians. It wasn't long before the Desians came and recaptured both of us. They healed Anna's injuries and it wasn't long before they attached another special exesphere to her body. It took some doing, but we finally managed to escape the ranch yet again. I even stole a key crest from the Desians so that Anna would not suffer the same fate as a monster. But it was never safe afterwards, we kept running from the Desians for fear of recapture and worked as mercenaries for a source of money. Our life was always one of danger, and that life of uncertainty was no life that we could give to you, Lloyd. Even if that were not the case, the Desians wouldn't leave us alone, we had almost lost you once."

"The Desians," Lloyd said bitterly, "That's horrible what they did to you. I hate them."

"If the Desians are still chasing you, why'd you come here now, of all times?" Dirk said, feeling a slight guilt wash over himself as he asked it.

"They have left us alone for some time now. Why they have done so alludes me."

"Maybe they decided to give up after so long of chasing you," Lloyd said as a bitterness overtook his voice, "All that for a stupid exesphere."

"Do you know now why you had to keep the exesphere hidden, Lloyd?"

"Yeah, yeah I know dad. But now that I know what they did to mom and dad to get a new one, I want to do all I can so they'll never get it."

"You called him 'dad'," Kratos said with an unreadable expression on his face.

"Well, yeah, he is my dad. But so are you," Lloyd thought for a moment before continuing on, "Yeah, I'm kind of like you, Colette, I've just got two dads now. I guess I'm just luckier then most people."

"R--right," Colette said, surprise lacing her voice at being spoken to after such a long time of being ignored. Dirk cursed inwardly, Colette had seen that private moment between the family as well. He had forgotten that she was there, "I'm so happy you found your parents, Lloyd. I guess now you'll get to know them better during the Journey of Regeneration."

"That's right," Lloyd said with excitement overtaking his voice, "I can hardly wait to finally be with my parents on the Journey of Regeneration. It'll be great!"

"You plan to go on the Journey of Regeneration?" Kratos said, with surprise that he did not mask, "I don't believe this to be the best idea. It will undoubtedly be a perilous journey."

"But--I'll get to spend time with you, I just met you again. If you're worried about me, don't worry, I can defend myself. Just look at how I fought at the temple."

"That is part of why I don't want you going on the journey. You're attacks are self-taught, there is much that you need to learn before you will truly be able to live up to your potential."

"Just what is that supposed to mean?"

"I suppose that it's not your fault, after all it is a small village that you live near with no skilled swords master residing there to train you properly. If there were more time I would train you myself, however there is not. The journey will undoubtedly contain many life threatening situations, and the Desians will pursue us throughout. Those Desians have been taught by skilled swords masters, your self-taught stance and attacks wouldn't prove to be effective enough against them. Many of the Chosen's groups have failed and died in the past, I will not place my own son in such danger."

"But dad--"

"Your father's right, Lloyd, It'll be too dangerous on the Journey of Regeneration, you could get hurt."

"But mom," Lloyd said, the anger drained from his voice, "I know it'll be dangerous but I still want to go. Especially since I know that you and dad are going on it."

"I think you should respect your parents wishes, Lloyd. After all this time they finally found you after protecting you from the Desians. Of course they wouldn't want you going on it, it'd almost be like coming to get you before the Desians left them alone."

"But I--I just met them and now they're leaving."

"Lloyd, I think you should stay too," Colette said after remaining silent, "You're parents are finally here and they're worried about you. It must mean that they really care about you, even if they couldn't be with you."

"They're worried about me?" Lloyd repeated, his voice holding a mixture of astonishment and marvel, "I…I always wanted my parents to be there and worry about me. I hate how some of the other kids complained when their parents doing stuff that meant they cared about them. I always wanted my parents to be there doing that too."

"Well now you have us, sweetie," Anna said, putting a hand on his shoulder, "I know that it'll be hard on you, it'll be hard on me too. I wish I could stay here with you."

"I can see no reason why you cannot stay with him," Kratos said, and Dirk's eyes flashed to his in bewilderment, "My presence on the Chosen's journey will suffice, and it's not as if I will be alone. There is that other woman that will be accompanying the Chosen."

"Kratos? What are you saying?"

"That you should stay with Lloyd during the Journey of Regeneration. It will not be for long, afterwards I will return to Iselia and rejoin the both of you. I would rather stay here with you, but with the matter of the world's regeneration, I would rather accompany the Chosen myself."

Anna gazed at her husband for a time, never voicing a response, and Dirk may have imagined it but hw could have sworn that he saw a hint of confusion in her eyes.

"Mom? You mean you're staying with me? That's great!"

"Yeah, I'll stay with you," Anna said turning to Lloyd with a smile, "I guess now I can finally get to know you again. I'm so sorry, I've missed so much of your life."

"Don't worry about it, mom, you'll get plenty of time to get to know me. You guys couldn't come back for me, I understand."

"Right," She said, turning her eyes downcast, "Of course you do."

"Don't worry about finding a place to stay, there's plenty of room to be had in this house, and I don't mind the company you can stay here for however long you need," Dirk said then finished as an afterthought, "You can both stay the night here as well. It makes no sense staying in Iselia when your own son is right here."

"Thank you," Anna said looking at him with sincere gratitude, "Thank you so much, for everything. You've been nothing but kind to my son and now to me."

"Ah, it's nothing."

"Dwarven vow number two, right dad?"

"You know Dwarven vows?" Kratos said with a hint of distaste, "What has he been teaching you?"

"Don't be like that, Kratos, I think it's sweet. The Dwarven vows sound like they'd teach nothing but to be good. It means he's raised our son well."

"I'm glad I've got your approval."

"Me too. You know, I think I might start learning those Dwarven vows, too. I already know the second one."

"I think I can help you with that, I always like hearing people that are interested in the vows."

"You as well?" Kratos said to Anna, and she looked up at him with a small smile.

"Yeah, 'me as well'."

"I guess I should be leaving now," came the uncertain voice of the Chosen.

"Don't be silly, Colette. You should say your last goodbyes to Lloyd before going on the journey. He's been your friend for awhile, right? It's only fair," Colette looked as if she were about to voice a response but Anna beat her to it, "Don't worry about taking our time away from Lloyd's, I think that I need to have a talk with Kratos."

"And say you're goodbyes too?"

"Yes," Anna replied sombrely to the girl, "That's right. Now you two should go on, now."

"Okay, mom, we'll do that. Let's go to the terrace like you wanted, okay Colette?"

"Okay, Lloyd," Colette responded with a smile and allowed Lloyd to lead her up the wooden steps towards Lloyd's room and the terrace that Dirk had built. Dirk shook his head, always cheerful, that one. She was a fine Chosen.

"We should be leaving too, Kratos. There are a few things that I'd like to talk about with you. Alone."

Dirk may have imagined it, but he thought he saw Kratos' proud stance stiffen. Kratos merely nodded in response before he held the door open, allowing Anna to walk ahead of him. He closed the door behind himself, leaving Dirk alone in the single roomed floor.

Dirk smiled as he stood there in the silence. How things could change in such a small time. He now knew what had happened on that mysterious night so long ago and the identity of Lloyd's parents were made clear to him. They were good people, hunted by the Desians their only crime. He walked towards his stone worktable again, and began work upon the key crest for the prisoner that Lloyd had encountered at the ranch. If an exesphere without a key crest would turn the person into a monster if it were removed then he would have to get this done by the morning so that Lloyd could give it to the poor soul. He could stand to lose a bit of sleep, if it meant helping someone in need.

As his hands worked in the fashion that he had been taught by his own father, his thoughts mulled to the fact that another person would be living in the house that he had built. It could stand to have a renovation or at the very least another room to be added, even if Anna was only staying in the house for however long the Journey of Regeneration lasted. It was Lloyd's own mother, after all, and he wanted her accommodations to be the best that he could supply.


	6. Lost and Damned

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia or the song Lost and Damned by Kamelot that helped to inspire this chapter._

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_Lost and Damned_

Anna did not notice any details of the forest that lay in nightfall as her thoughts were entirely consumed with the unexpected reunion with her son that happened mere moments ago. Although she had convinced Kratos to walk far away from the house where her son and the people that were a part of his life resided so she had more time to think of the motives of his unexpected words and actions her mind refused to co-operate. Anger solidified inside of herself and despite her ability to push it from her mind when she so desired she could not. It was her own son that Kratos had lied to and in that moment she did not care about any of the multitude of reasons that drove him to do so. All she cared about was how what was how that must have affected Lloyd.

"Lloyd looks as if he's doing well."

Anna stopped in her tracks and glared up at him, feeling her anger intensify.

"That's all you have to say for yourself?"

"I'm afraid I don't follow," Kratos responded with a voice that served as a mask of calm as he halted his steps as well and drew his gaze towards her.

"What do you mean you don't follow?" Anna practically yelled, not caring of who heard her, "What the hell were you thinking? You lied to Lloyd about everything!"

"Should I have told him the truth?"

"Yeah, that would've been nice. It also would've been nice if you didn't lie to me so that I didn't find out about everything that our son thinks happened to us."

"I would had I the time, I had to think of a reason quickly or--"

"There's no way you could've thought of a story that believable on the spot. You have no imagination."

"I can't deny that," Kratos said and he even had the audacity to smile, "I admit that I did know that we were going to Iselia."

"You _knew_ that we were going to Iselia and you didn't tell me."

"I thought you knew already. It's common knowledge where the Chosen's live. Thethe'alla's Chosen is in Meltokio and Sylvarant's Chosen is in Iselia. I suppose it's your own fault for being so ignorant."

"Don't try to turn this around on me. If that's true then you would've at least mentioned the fact that we were about to meet Lloyd to me before we left."

"I did lie to you but I just didn't want you to get your hopes up only to find that Lloyd was not here, or even dead."

"I don't believe you," Anna said, studying Kratos' carefully composed face. He was wearing that mask again, the one he always used when he want to hide something, "Don't lie to me. If I didn't find out we were in Iselia, we could've missed Lloyd. And you would've known how close we came to meeting him again. You wanted to keep Lloyd from me!"

"I did no such thing," Kratos' voice held anger of his own, and his mask crumbled as quickly as it had been constructed, "I had to keep it from you, I had no idea what you would have said had you the time to think about it. You may have even told Lloyd the truth of why we left him and of Cruxis and the coming Age of Lifeless Beings."

"Maybe Lloyd deserves to know about all that. You know, I can still tell him everything. Maybe I should go back now and prove to him how much of a liar his father is."

"No, you can't tell Lloyd. He'll be happier if he continues to believe that the line between good and evil is definite and that evil can be eliminated by a simple journey to regenerate the world. Why should we ruin his innocent notions and tell him that there's an evil that can't be stopped?"

"But that's the truth, he deserves to know what really happened to us and about the worlds. He's our son, lying to him is cruel."

"Sometimes the truth is crueller then a lie. If Lloyd knew what actually happened and of the true nature of the worlds think of what that would do to him. He would know that the world is a dark place and that there is nothing that he can do to change that. Who knows, he may even foolishly attempt to stop Yggdrasill and that would only lead to his death. Lloyd can't know the truth, he would only lose his innocence and his happiness. Tell me your not foolish enough to rob Lloyd of everything that we gave him when we left him to be raised in Sylvarant."

"You're right," Anna said, feeling shock replace the anger that had clouded her mind before, "You were only thinking about Lloyd, it'd be horrible if he knew everything."

"Yes it would. We should continue to protect him from the truth."

"But why didn't you tell me we were going to Iselia. If you told me what you just said I never would've told Lloyd the truth."

"I didn't know that, I can never tell what you would do and I," he hesitated before continuing, "I didn't want to cause you any unnecessary anguish when you've already been through so much because of me. Now you can finally be with Lloyd again after so many years apart. I should think that you'd be happy at that."

"I am happy, I'm so happy," Anna said, the knowledge that she now knew lay forgotten at the sound of her son's name, "I still can't believe that we met him, I thought I'd never see him again. He looks so much like you, he's got your eyes, you know."

"And he has your stubborn personality."

"Stubborn? I resent that."

"As you should," Kratos said as he smiled at her and Anna could not help but smile back.

"I can't believe that we barely know anything about him," Anna said feeling a disappointment wash over her, "But I want to make up for that now. I'll learn so much about Lloyd and I'll tell you all about him once you come back from the Journey of Regeneration."

"I'd like that."

"But what are we going to tell Lloyd after you come back? We'll have to go back to Derris-Kharlan after and leave him and--wait. You can't planning to bring him back with us, that's horrible."

"No," Kratos said forcefully, "Haven't you been listening at all to what I've been saying? I would never allow him to ascend to Derris-Kharlan."

"Good. I wouldn't either," Anna saw as Kratos' features relax and she wondered why he seemed so strained. Kratos was acting a bit strange. _Probably just worried about what I think about him_, she thought before her thoughts returned to that of her son, "But I'm going to have to leave Lloyd after the journey's done. I'll only have a few months with him, a year at best. I don't know if I could handle leaving Lloyd after being with him that long."

"Then you don't have to leave him."

"What? I don't have to go back to Derris-Kharlan?"

"I won't force you to return there if you don't want to go back."

"I don't have to go back there," Anna said as shock and disbelief coursed through her being, "I really don't have to go back there ever again."

"I knew that you'd be glad of that."

Anna heard Kratos' words but she was not listening anymore. Her thoughts lay on all of the implications that those few simple words that Kratos had said held. She would finally be able to leave the place that she despised the most, she would be able to do what she thought was impossible and stay with Lloyd. It could not be so simple as Kratos was making it out to be, she pushed all of the hope and joy that had risen in her being aside, she needed to get answers. She needed Kratos to tell her the truth that he thought was cruel.

"Won't Yggdrasill want to know where we went if we don't come back after the Journey of Regeneration? He won't just let us go, you're the Origin's Seal and I'm the insurance that you won't defy him."

"I won't be able to rejoin you and Lloyd after I complete the Journey of Regeneration," Kratos stared at her with eyes that held such emotion that she wasn't used to seeing, "When I told you that you could stay with Lloyd, I meant only you. It isn't possible for me to stay with you."

"What do you mean? What do you mean!" Anna yelled, feeling her anger return to her, "What do you mean you're gonna leave! What do you mean you're going back to Derris-Kharlan!" Anna felt numb at the thought and she felt despair wash over her. Never did she think that it was possible that she would be separated from him, she had been with him for so long already. The very idea of life without him frightened her, "I'm never gonna see you again."

"I couldn't keep that from you for long," Kratos said softly, "You always did have a way to get the truth out of me."

"You weren't even going to tell me. Do you really want to leave me that badly?"

"I don't want you to leave, don't think otherwise. If I were only thinking of myself I wouldn't have you leave my side, I'm doing this for you. Just look at what I've done to you while I've made you stay with me all this time."

"You're talking like it was your fault that I was stuck on Derris-Kharlan. That's not true, it was all Yggdrasill's fault that I had to stay there," Kratos stared at her with those same melancholic eyes, remaining silent, "Right?"

"I suppose that's true," he hesitated before continuing on, as if debating to himself whether or not to tell her, "When we first began to dwell on Derris-Kharlan Yggdrasill wouldn't have let either of us leave it because he was afraid that I may defy him again. But as soon as he knew that I was taking his threat seriously he wouldn't care if we left Derris-Kharlan on one mission or another for Cruxis. I could have descended upon Sylvarant and left you with Lloyd for years now but I chose not to."

"What," Anna's voice broke as she felt further shock course through her, "I could've been with Lloyd before. I could've watched him grow up."

"I should have left you here sooner. I was being selfish."

"But I…I…" Anna's head was blank and she felt no anger at what she now knew, "Why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Because if you knew it wouldn't be long before I'd be leaving you here. I had thought that I may be enough to make you happy and I was wrong but I didn't care because you were with me. I didn't want you to leave."

Anna stared at him, her mind blank as a mixture of disbelief and despair and confusion roiled inside of her all at once.

"Why don't you come back here after you finish the Journey of Regeneration. Then we could both work on finding a Summoner and reuniting the world together," her mind was scrambling to find something, anything, that would make him stay. She was terrified for him to leave her and she didn't know why, "You'd still have to go back to Derris-Kharlan eventually, but you could still come down here sometimes. Think about it, Yggdrasill wouldn't have anything to threaten…"

Kratos was already shaking his head and Anna forgot what she was going to say next as his eyes bore into her own revealing an infinitesimal sadness, "No, I can't do that. It would look suspicious to Yggdrasill that right after I told him that you died that I began to defy his wishes."

"You're going to tell him that I died?"

"How else can you stay with Lloyd. If Yggdrasill knew that you were living he would demand your return. I'll tell him that you died by the hands of the Renegades. Then he'll think that I want vengeance for your death. He won't question my loyalty."

"You really thought this through, didn't you?" Anna said before remembering how close she was to losing him, "But you could still come back, even if it looks suspicious to Yggdrasill, who cares? There'd be no way he'd know that I'm alive. Then he'd have nothing to threaten against you so then eventually--"

"No. He'll find out that you're still alive and he'd find you. He'd kill you. He may even find Lloyd since you'll both will be together. Even our son would die by his hand all for the impossibility to put a stop to his twisted vision of the world. I cannot have the only people I care for die for a fantasy."

"It's not just a fantasy. Doesn't it matter at all that all these people are dying and suffering? There's even a human ranch right near Iselia!"

"Of course it matters, I never said that it didn't," Kratos' voice was laced in subtle anger, "But you should know by know that Yggdrasill cannot be stopped. I'm doing what I can to ease the suffering of the people of Sylvarant. Perhaps you could do the same. I'm sure that you would want to help the people in the ranch near Iselia. Help those that are in front of you."

As he stared into his brown eyes she felt her anger fade away, "Why do you always do that?

"Do what?"

"Make it so that it's impossible to stay mad at you."

"I suppose I have a gift," he said with a wry smile.

"Don't get arrogant," She returned his smile, "I'm really gonna miss you, you know. Do you really have to go?"

"Yes, unless you want to go back to Derris-Kharlan to stay with me but I doubt that you would. You despise Derris-Kharlan."

Kratos was right. There was no way that she would want to go back to that god-forsaken place if she had the choice never to return. But as she stared into his familiar brown eyes she felt a part of her that did not want to leave him and another part that did. What was she supposed to think? This man was going to do nothing to stop so much wrong in the world and yet this same man had made her happier then she had ever felt before. He had been the one to save her from a hatred that had seemed all consuming, the only one that she had opened up to. Could she really leave a man that she had loved so much before? Could she really stay with a man that refused to act?

Kratos was still where he stood in the light of the full moon, with features that held a contemplative despair.

"How did things get so bad?"

"I've known that things were this bad for some time, Anna. I can't even tell you anymore that I'd never hold my sword against you."

"But I know you wouldn't. You only held a sword against me that one time because I begged--"

"It was more then just then. I stopped you from attacking Yggdrasill by my own sword."

"You can't mean…" the unpleasant memory uncoiled in her mind before she could stop it, "When I overheard Yggdrasill telling you that he'd kill me if you did something he didn't like and I attacked him after 'cause I felt so mad."

"I held my sword against your throat!" Kratos said vehemently and Anna's eyes widened as she stared at him, "I've sworn to you that I would never turn my sword against you, I've told myself that I never would. I've failed you."

"Don't say that. You didn't--"

"I know that I had to show more loyalty to Yggdrasill then to you, in my mind it's as if I'm protecting you. But it doesn't feel that way. I can't even tell you now that I would never hurt you. How can I tell you that I'll always protect you when I can't even protect you from myself."

"But that only happened once. I don't think that--"

"I was careful. I wasn't about to allow let something like that to happen again. It'll be better if you stay with Lloyd. He will never raise his sword against you."

"But I--I don't know what to do. I don't know if I want you to go but I know I don't want to go back there and--"

"Then you don't have to. Stay here with Lloyd, Anna. I should know by now that I cannot make you happy."

"That's not true," she said hating that she doubted the meaning behind the words that she spoke. In her mind memories flashed of all the things that he failed to do, the promise that he broke, of life on Derris-Kharlan, "It can't be true. You used to make me so happy."

"I used to make you happy," he said with a tinge of sombreness lacing his voice, "I was hoping that I would be enough to make you happy now and forget about all that is dark in the world. I was wrong, I've known that for years but I've been too selfish to let you go."

"But I…" she stopped the sentence before she could complete it. She could not lie to him, not now. How could she deny him the truth of how she felt?

"You don't have to lie to me, Anna. I can't stand by and watch you slip into despair anymore. I thought that I could bear it if you grew to hate me but I never thought that this life would bring you to such misery. Imagine what another decade would do to you. A century."

This information slowly processed through her mind, "You could tell that I was sad? I thought I hid it so well from you."

"Not from me. You were always such a terrible liar."

"I am? You mean you could always tell when I lied to you?"

"Always."

"Even the little ones?"

"Even the little ones," His voice held a hint of smile as she gazed at her through unreadable eyes, "How I will miss this. Never again will I be able to talk to someone as I do to you."

"Kratos, I--"

A warm hand come to her face and she felt his thumb lightly stroke her lips which silenced her words.

"You're the only woman that I've ever loved, the only woman that I will ever love."

"Why are you talking like that?"

"Anna, this is the last time that we will be alone together. I want you to know how much I care for you before I leave for the Journey of Regeneration, even if you don't care for me anymore."

"That's not true, I do care about you, if I didn't then this wouldn't be so hard seeing you leave. I just…I don't know if I love you, that's all. I don't know what to think about you now."

"You said that I used to make you happy. Perhaps it would be best if you remember what it was like when I did. Don't forget what we had."

"Yeah…what we had was beautiful--"

"And blue," he smiled at the memory that they both shared and Anna smiled with him against the thumb that slowly stroked her lips.

How could Kratos smile like that and still look so sad? This really was going to be one of the last times that she was going to see him. The last time. It did not feel real, but she knew that it was and the reality of it all was too much. Never did she think that when she married him that it would end like this. They were naïve notions but she had believed that they would always be together, that they would create a world together where everyone could live equally. And now Kratos thought all that was a fantasy.

"I wish I could cry."

"You want to cry," His voice was laced in a melancholic shock.

"Yeah, but I can't, not anymore. Ever since I started living on Derris-Kharlan I used to cry but I guess I just got used to everything that's been happening. The tears started feeling meaningless. Everything started feeling that way."

"Anna," warm arms wrapped about her and she did nothing to resist, "I had no idea."

Anna did not know how to respond as she felt a despair wash over her again. Before she knew what she was doing she wrapped her own arms about him, holding him as tightly as he could and buried her head on his chest. She was afraid. She was so afraid of what was to come. It was hard to imagine what life was like without him. He had always been there for her and now that he was leaving all she could think about was how much that she wanted him to stay. She did not know if she loved him anymore, but she could not stand the thought of his departure because life without him was frightening. Was that selfish?

His arms tightened around her so much that she knew that her strength alone would not allow her to pull away but she did not care. This embrace was different then the ones that she remembered, there was a tension in the air. A part of her mind screamed for him to release her and another chastised that part of her mind that wanted him to let go. She had married this man, she had vowed to always love him. She could not just abandon him. She felt numb, everything about him made her numb. His lips found their way to the top of her head and she felt them press against her tangled hair. If he did this years ago she knew that these actions would send thrills through her body that only he could cause in her. But that time was in the past.

Anna lifted her head from his chest and she felt his lips graze her own as she rose her head to look at him. His eyes were clouded in emotion that she was familiar with, he had always looked at her with such emotion and now it was unguarded and the full extent of it was unmasked for her to see. He still loved her. He still loved the one that he vowed to always love and she had no idea if she could feel the same way. Those emotions that he still felt had already left her.

"I'm so sorry," she whispered.

"For what?" As he softly spoke she felt the warmth of his breathe brush across her face.

"I don't know if I love you and I promised that I always would. I married you and I vowed--"

"Shh," Kratos hushed and the breathe made her shiver while his lips grazed across her cheek towards her ear, "I'm amazed that you still care for me, don't worry about our vows. Marriage is an act for those that are not like me, for people that haven't lived for four thousand years. I should have known that it would end this way but I was too selfish to care, too blinded by your light. It's not you're fault, this isn't your fault. If anyone is to blame, it's me."

Anna's eyes widened while her vision of the forest became obscured by his auburn hair and the words that he uttered so softly sunk into her mind. All the lies and words that she knew would comfort him were lost to her in that moment as his arms tightened their hold, ensnaring her further against his body. The warmth of his chest, of his arms, of his breathe was searing into her. She knew that she should want him to release her but her mind drew blank as the warm skin of his face pressed against her cheek.

"I love you," He murmured as his breathe gently glided through her hair and against her ear, never forceful, never rough. _He needs this_, she thought, her vacant mind finally making sense of the situation, _More then me. So much more then me. _So she would not pull away. She would let him hold her and she would let him kiss her and she would let him do whatever he wanted to her and she would not deny him. How could she when this was going to be the last time he ever saw her. The last time that she ever saw him.

Anna pressed her lips roughly against his jawbone and they lingered there for mere moments as shock coursed through her system. There were none of the thrills that normally accompanied such actions but she shook it off, that did not matter anymore. She tore across his jawbone towards his lips with a passion that she knew he would want her to show and an anger at the emotions that she could not feel anymore. She met his lips with that same angry passion and she soon felt him match it with a real passion that she knew she could not share. He wanted this, she knew, and she would give this to him in their final night together. His familiar scent, warmth and taste overwhelmed her all at once and she felt his arms move from their previous immobile hold. Anna braced herself for the act she knew would come soon.

But it never did.

Kratos' arms fell from their grasp around her and he tore from his embrace. His lips lingered on her own for a moment before he backed away from her completely. Anna's arms remained outstretched as she stared at him with utter disbelief coursing through her being.

"Isn't this what you want? Don't you want to do this?" She asked as she dropped her arms and felt as the cold air of the night wrapped around her, replacing the warmth that Kratos had provided.

"I've never been a victim of my lust. I would be loathe to allow my lack of self-control to harm you," Kratos' eyes were still residually burning with those familiar intense emotions.

"But this is our last night together."

"I want to spend our last night together the way that you want to spend it," Kratos said, and Anna stared into his eyes that held so many emotions, "I know that you would rather spend that time with Lloyd."

"That's not true. I'm going to see Lloyd for the rest of my life, but I only have another night with you. Don't you want to take advantage of that time?"

"This can't be what you want."

"Yes it is," Anna said but her voice shook, her hands shook as she reached out to wrap her arms around him again. He grabbed those same hands and held them gently.

"You're a terrible liar."

"Yeah, I guess you're right."

Anna felt his warmth around her hands while the rest of her body shivered in the cold of the night. She drew them away and stared into his emotive brown eyes, taking in his every feature. She did not want to forget what he looked like. No matter what this man has been responsible for, he had torn across her life and changed her so much. She did not want to imagine what her life would have amounted to if she never met him. But she knew that if she stayed with him now that it would cause her nothing but pain.

"Perhaps we should return to Lloyd," Kratos said softly bringing her from her thoughts, "I know that he'll be ecstatic to see you again."

"He will, won't he?" Anna said as she felt a joy resonate inside herself that mix with the myriad of other emotions that roiled inside of herself, "He'll be happy to see you too. But…you won't be able to see Lloyd again. You'll never get to know him, you'll never get to watch him finish growing up."

"I suppose not," he said, his eyes mirroring the melancholy that she knew he was experiencing, "But I know that you will get to know him and that you will watch him as he matures and that will be enough for me. Knowing that you and Lloyd are in the world alive and well, I'll try to remember that at least a part of world is beautiful and blue."

_Why can't I cry. I want to cry. I want to cry. I can't even cry for him_, Anna thought as despair washed inside of herself, a despair far greater then that she remembered experiencing when she had succumbed to tears, _Maybe the feeling's inside are more important then what's showing on the outside. But if I can't cry on the outside then how will he know what I'm really feeling?_

"I'm not happy that you're leaving. Please don't think that."

"What?" His voice was laced in confusion, "Why would I think that you're happy about this?"

"Because I can't cry! I can't cry for you anymore."

"Just because you can't cry doesn't mean that I don't know of your despair. It mirrors my own."

"Mirrors your own?" Anna repeated slowly and thoughts rushed to her mind as to how her departure would affect him, and worry, as illogical as ever, coursed through her. _This must be so much harder on him._

Suddenly she became all too aware of the silver locket that always hung from her neck. She brought her fingers to it absently and opened it to reveal the picture that resided inside. She smiled fondly at the picture and of the time that it reminded her.

"I remember when I gave that to you. It was a wedding gift."

"Wedding?" She smiled as her gaze shifted from the picture to Kratos, "More like for our anniversary, you gave this to me after Lloyd was a few years old. We all had to pose for that picture."

"It was hard keeping Lloyd still enough to take it. We had to bribe him."

"With chocolate," Anna said smiling fondly at the memory, "I still can't believe what a mess he was after he ate it. I had to give him a really long bath."

"He must have felt betrayed. After having a picture taken of him he got chocolate only to have a bath."

Anna laughed, "He always did hate baths."

"I know. It was always a struggle to get him into one. He always seemed to get us as wet as he was when he was in a bad mood," Kratos said as he looked at her with brown eyes filled with nostalgia and joy at the memories that they both shared. Anna felt the warming metal of the locket in her hand and she brought her gaze to Kratos and smiled as those same memories that he was undoubtedly thinking of flooded her mind.

Anna lifted the locket above her head so the locket no longer hung about her neck. It felt strange not having the familiar weight about her but she ignored that feeling and stretched her hand towards him, "Here."

"Anna, I can't. I gave that to you to make up for all of the gifts that I failed to give you before. I thought that you liked it."

"I do like it, really I do. I was so happy when you gave it to me."

"Then you can keep it to remember me."

"I don't need a locket to remember you by, I just think that you're going to need this more then I will. I'll have Lloyd and you won't have anybody."

Kratos' expression was unreadable and he remained silent before he reluctantly stretched his arm towards hers. His hand brushed hers as he took the locket and he brought his arm towards himself, holding the locket as he stared at it.

"I rather prefer this to be your last request then what it was before."

Anna felt confusion at his words for mere moments before the memory that fuelled the words flooded her mind, "Kratos, you don't mean when I asked you to…"

He nodded, his eyes turning from the locket towards her.

The emotions that she saw his brown eyes hold tore her apart. No matter what she never wanted to see him look like that again, she wanted nothing more then to erase it from his mind. She walked closer towards him and drew her arms around him fully realizing the implications of the actions. She wanted to comfort him, this one last time. He stiffened at her touch.

"This is what I want."

His eyes held shock at her words as she felt him relax and his own arms wrap around her, enveloping her in his warmth. She leaned forwards and captured his lips in a kiss that was soft and gentle, not one full of false passion and anger. It held no promise of any unruly actions that she had no desire to come to fruition, she wasn't lying to him anymore. She wanted to give him this final farewell.

_A/N: I must give credit where credit is due. The idea of Kratos having to hold a sword against Anna was entirely Eyes of the Infinite Galaxy's and she was kind enough to let me use it in this chapter. Apparently she's writing a one-shot related to that whole idea.  
_


	7. Shadow Play

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia. I also don't own the song that I named this after, by Three, a band I've recently come to adore. There are a few of the lyrics I thought were fitting to this chapter that I included._

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* * *

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_Shadow Play_

"Saw what I saw

Know what I know

You feed the fires in my

Mountain of snow

When I close my eyes

Feel the red sun rise

Set a fire this morning

To perform our last goodbye."

Lloyd breathed in the cool morning air as he walked across the familiar stone and dirt path in Iselia with his parents by his side. The early morning skies were kind of pretty, with all the different shades of red, orange and yellow intermingling with each other and the red sun slowly rising in the east to meet the new day. It was much too early for anyone, especially Lloyd, to be awake and normally he would never agree to be awake at such an ungodly hour. But today was different. Excitement coursed through his system at everything that had happened so quickly. He smiled as he looked at the faces of his parents, who were walking to each side of him in amicable silence.

"It's a shame Noishe couldn't enter the village today," mom said, breaking the silence that had settled between them.

"Yeah, you're right," Lloyd said, the disgruntled returned to him. He was so sure that Noishe would be allowed to enter today of all days, "Now Noishe can't see dad off."

"He's seen me off as far as he's able to," dad said, voicing his dismissive thoughts on the subject, "Don't concern yourself of it, it doesn't matter to me that I can't be with Noishe for another hour or so."

"I bet you wouldn't be saying that if it was me not allowed inside Iselia."

"And why would you not be allowed inside Iselia?"

"Because I'm a danger to society."

Dad chuckled, "And why are you a danger to society?"

"Mom's not a danger to society!"

"Of course I'm not," mom said, catching Lloyd's eye with a playful smile, "This is just a hypothetical situation."

"A what?"

"A hypothetical situation. It's like a situation that didn't happen but we act like it does when talking about it and…" Lloyd stared at her wide eyed with confusion coursing through his being. He was trying to understand, really he was, "You don't get it, do you?"

"N--not really."

"I know what it is I just can't explain it. Kratos, help me out here. You can explain it better then me."

"I think anyone could explain it better then you," dad said and his features were etched in amusement at what Lloyd knew was mom's irritation. He shifted his gaze to Lloyd and his tone took a more serious note, "A hypothetical situation is a theory of what could possibly happen in a situation that didn't occur in reality. It doesn't matter how absurd the possible scenario is, it doesn't have to be realistic. Then, we'd ask a series of questions to see if this situation is plausible. For instance, your mother asked what I would do if she wasn't allowed inside Iselia. I asked her why she wouldn't be allowed inside of Iselia in the situation that would force her not to enter. It's a series of logical what-if's based on one presumption."

"Oh," Lloyd felt an unfamiliar feeling of understanding wash over him, one that he never had during any of Professor Sage's classes that he never really paid attention to, "I think I get it now."

"Try to come up with a hypothetical situation of your own."

"Okay, I'll try to," Lloyd said as he concentrated, much more then he ever tried to in school, to come up with the right answer, "So…a hypothetical situation would be like if the guards let Noishe inside Iselia today. And then…I'd have to say why, so…he'd be let inside to see you off?"

"Correct," dad's voice was laced in approval and Lloyd felt a satisfaction course through him at that.

"Alright," Lloyd said. Maybe now I finally know something Genis doesn't. I'll have to tell him about it later.

"I knew that you'd explain it so much better then me."

"What makes you say that?"

"What do you think? You're a good teacher."

"Hmm."

"But you are. Look at what you just did now, you taught Lloyd what a hypothetical situation is."

"I'm sure that's something that Lloyd could have learned easily enough otherwise."

"That's not true, I barely understand anything that Professor Sage tries to teach me."

"You do?" Dad's voice was raised ever so slightly, "Tell me, Lloyd, how are your grades?"

"Er, w--well…I guess they're kind of…" Lloyd shifted uncomfortably under his father's scrutiny, his mind scrambled to find something to change the topic, "Er, well if Professor Sage tried to tell me what a hypothetical situation is I don't think I'd get it, but I got it when you told me…"

"You see? Lloyd isn't even good at school and he understands what it is," mom said and from the look that mom gave him he knew that the subject of school would come up again, "And don't forget about everything that you taught me. I never even touched a sword before I met you and look at me now, I'd have to say that I can fight pretty well. You've got a real talent for teaching, I still don't know how you taught me."

"I…" dad was at a loss for words and Lloyd grinned.

"You taught mom how to fight?"

"Yeah, he taught me everything that I ever needed to know about swordplay. Even told me a few self-defence tricks if I ever found myself without my sword."

"Wow," Lloyd said, staring up at dad and feeling a pride and astonishment flood his system. Dad was everything he could have ever hoped for in a father, "I wish you could stay and teach me all that."

"As would I. But that doesn't mean that you can be without a proper teacher. Your mother can train you, she should be more then capable."

"What?" Mom's voice was laced with annoyance, "I can't teach."

"I'm sure you can if you put your mind to it," dad's voice held a playful note to it, "You know everything I've taught you, you've benefited from it for years. Perhaps you can recall how I taught you as you teach Lloyd."

"Yeah, mom," Lloyd could barely contain the excitement he felt coursing through his system at this prospect, "I'd love it if you'd teach me how to fight."

"Lloyd…I…of course I'll teach you," mom's tone was a gentle one as she gazed at Lloyd before she turned to dad and her tone suddenly changed to a harsh one, "That's not fair what you just did."

Dad shrugged, "I suppose not. Perhaps you should have thought of that when you complimented me."

"Oh, so this is revenge, is it? You know, I'll never understand you, you can't even take a compliment."

"Humph," dad said but he was smiling and Lloyd could tell that he was not serious. Mom laughed and he could not help but laugh with her. Mom's laughter was like that, it was infectious. Well, at least that's what Lloyd thought but he could be biased.

"This would be perfect if Noishe was here," mom said after her laughter subsided, "I wonder why they wouldn't let him in. You'd think they'd make an exception for one of the Chosen's companions on the day that she leaves on the Journey of Regeneration."

"If anything that's the reason that they wouldn't allow Noishe to enter," dad said as they rounded a corner on path that curved around a wooden house, "Perhaps they thought that Noishe would attack other villagers, or that he would create a disturbance during a time where it's important to focus on the Chosen and her journey."

"Noishe would never do that," Lloyd said, feeling offended that dad would ever think that about his childhood pet.

"I know Noishe would never do any of those things but they don't. I doubt they know what to make of Noishe, Protozoans are a rare species after all."

"Isn't Noishe a dog?"

"No," Dad said, gazing at him through amused eyes, "Have you never wondered why he doesn't look like any other dog you've encountered and he acts as intelligent as you or I? I've told you that I've known Noishe for some time--"

"Way before he met me."

"He's been alive even before I met him," Dad ignored mom's interruption like it never happened and Lloyd grinned. They were so close, they even cut into each other's sentences like people in love were supposed to, "and then he stayed with you for fourteen years. His lifespan is far beyond that of a mere dog."

"Oh," Lloyd said, dumbfounded at the logic that he missed out on before, "Well now that you mention it that makes a lot of sense. What's Noishe again? A Prota…?"

"Protozoan."

"Pro…to…zoan? Protozoan. Protozoan. Protozoan," he repeated to himself to help him remember the word that he wanted nothing more but not to end up as the multitude of big words that Professor Sage attempted to teach him, "Got it. Now I won't forget."

"Do you really need to repeat words like that to remember them?" Came mom's teasing voice.

"Hey, I'm not that good at remembering stuff like this and now I won't forget what Noishe is. A Protozoan."

Dad chuckled, "Repetition is a method to study, I'm sure that you'll remember. Do take care of Noishe while I'm gone. I won't be able to see him for quite some time."

"You know, I've been thinking, Kratos. Maybe Noishe could go with you instead of staying here with me and Lloyd," Lloyd's eyes flashed to dad and he looked completely stunned at mom's words.

"Y--yeah. That's a great idea," Lloyd felt shock course through him and his stomach plummeted at the thought of Noishe's departure.

"Anna, Lloyd," dad said, looking at both of them through his grateful eyes as his movements stilled and him and mom stopped along with him. They were near Genis' house, Lloyd noted in the back of his mind as he watched dad and waited for him to respond, "I…I'd like that, truly I would. But I think Noishe would be better off staying here with the two of you. "

"I know you want him to stay with us, but what about you."

"Don't concern yourself of me, I'd prefer it if he remained here to watch over both of you while I'm absent."

"Like we need looking after. I can look after myself just fine, and so can Lloyd. You two are old friends, I'm sure he'd like to travel with you again and I know that you'd love to travel with him."

"I would. But--

"No. No buts. Think about it, if Noishe went with you it could take you back to your bachelor days where it was just you and Noishe. It could remind you of old times."

"I…I suppose it would."

"Great, so it's settled. We should probably go back and find Noishe so we can tell him to meet you."

"Y--yeah. That's great…" Lloyd's voice was laced in disappointment, his eyes fixated on the purple spring red and purple tulips that were in bloom in front of Genis and Professor Sage's house.

"What's wrong, Lloyd?"

"Oh, it's nothing."

"It's not nothing," Lloyd felt a hand come to his arm and his gaze turned from the flowers to his mother's eyes shaped in concern, "You can tell me. What is it?"

"It concerns Noishe," dad said and it wasn't a question, and Lloyd tore his eyes from his mother to look at dad who had moved to his side, feeling guilt well inside of him at his selfish thought.

"Y--yeah. I don't really want Noishe to go. I mean, he's been with me for a long time and…I don't really want him to go. I know it sounds stupid, dad, he should go with you."

"No," dad said firmly, "I think that he should remain here in Iselia, with you."

"Really?"

"Kratos, I--"

"Don't argue, Anna. This is what Lloyd wants. It's what I want as well."

Mom's hand was still on Lloyd's arm but her eyes turned from him to dad.

"So you're really going to be all alone after all, aren't you?" Mom said softly, and surprise coursed through Lloyd at the tone of her voice. She sounded sad. Really sad. Sadder then he ever heard her sound before and the shock was replaced by confusion. What would mom have to be sad over? Shouldn't she be happy?

"What are you talking about, mom?" Lloyd said, wanting her despair to disappear as soon as he explained the situation right, "Dad's going to be with Colette and Professor Sage. He's not going to be alone, he'll have plenty of company. Colette's really nice and the Professor's kind of scary but she's okay if you give her a chance."

"Lloyd?" Mom turned to him, "I…I guess you're right."

"Don't worry, Anna, I'll be fine," dad said as he moved a hand to grasp hers, "It would be nice to have a few months without you constantly by my side, pestering me. I could use the time alone."

"Hey, you're making it sound like I'm a nuisance."

"You are, at times."

"Where's this coming from?" Mom said through a laugh and dad smiled, "I thought I was 'the light of your life', 'the only woman that you ever loved.' What happened to all that? Well, I guess things change. I just hope you don't forget about your nuisance of a wife and set your sights on Lloyd's teacher while your away."

"Dad wouldn't do that," Lloyd shuddered and he felt confusion flood through his system when his comment was met with both of his parent's laughter, "What's so funny?"

"I was just kidding, Lloyd."

"Oh. I--I knew that. It's just that--" A yawn broke his sentence and he brought a hand to his mouth, "I…I'm just tired that's all."

"We did keep you up fairly late last night. Perhaps we should have thought of you before we kept you up for so long."

"Your father's right. I'm sorry, I think we got a bit carried away."

"Are you kidding me? There's no way I could've slept much last night, I wouldn't have been able to fall asleep even if you asked me to."

"I wouldn't have either," mom said with a smile. She glanced to dad before she continued, "You know, we should probably get going. We're probably leaving Colette waiting."

"I doubt it," dad said as they continued to walk towards the gates and Lloyd could see the school become more prominent as they approached it, "If anything we'll be on time. The Chosen did say that she wanted to leave around sunrise."

"Wonder why Colette would want something like that. It's too early to wake up."

"It is the Journey of Regeneration, after all," dad's voice was laced with amusement, "I imagine that it will be filled with early mornings such as this. The length of daylight should be taken advantage of when travelling the lands."

"I guess that's one good thing about not going," Lloyd said as he heard the low hum of voices and he forgot what he was going to say next. As they turned from the one room schoolhouse Lloyd's jaw dropped at what greeted his eyes. There was a crowd of people surrounding the gates, "Whoa! There's so many people."

"It's natural that so many people would gather for the Chosen's departure."

"They're all here for Colette? Wow, she must love that so many people came to see her off. I wonder where she is."

"Go on, Lloyd, go find Colette," mom said and Lloyd looked at her in confusion, "Don't worry, we'll be fine. You should have a few words with your friend before she goes and…I have a few things that I want to tell your father."

"Okay. I hope I can find her in this crowd."

"Good luck," mom called out as he started to walk towards the crowd.

Finding Colette in a crowd of more people then Lloyd cared to count was more difficult then he originally thought it would be. He thought that it may take a minute or two before he would find Colette. He was wrong. He wove his way around the people within the crowd, squeezing between those that refused to move out of his way. Frustration built up inside of himself as he moved his head this way and that searching futilely through the sea of familiar faces. The noise level was high as the villagers were busily talking amongst themselves and that immediately ruled out calling out for Colette. She would never have heard it. The annoyance intensified as he continued his search, moving closer to the front gates of Iselia as he wove his way through the crowd and blond hair caught the corner of his eye. Lloyd turned and spotted the familiar stance of the one he was looking for, standing by the gates. And the annoyance left him instantly.

"Colette!" Lloyd called out as he ran towards her, being careful to weave around any that moved in his way. She turned around, away from the villager that must have been offering his blessings, and her expression immediately brightened as her smile widened.

"You came," Colette's voice was laced in amazement.

"Of course I came, you dork, I told you I was going to. You don't have to sound so surprised."

"I know, I'm sorry."

"You don't have to apologize," Lloyd said before he sighed. It was better not to start with that now, "It took forever to find you. There's so many people here just to see you off."

"I know, I can't believe it. I guess it's a big deal that I'm leaving for the Journey of Regeneration. I don't think I've seen so many people all at once before, even at the festivals for my birthday. "

"Oh, right, your birthday," Lloyd said, feeling apprehension form in his being as he stared into Colette's joy filled eyes, "I'm sorry, Colette, I didn't finish your birthday present. I guess I kind of forgot about it last night because my parents were there and--"

"No, no, that's okay, I don't mind at all. I'd hate it if you spent the whole night working on my present when you just found your parents."

"I'll get it done when you get back, I promise. I'll have more time to work on it so I'll make it ten times better."

"Uh, thanks, I'd like that."

"So, are you excited to finally start the Journey of Regeneration?"

"Yep," she said before she giggled once again, her cerulean eyes alight with joy, "This is what I've been waiting for my whole life. I'll do my best so you and everyone else will be able to live happily in the regenerated world."

"If anyone can do it I know it's you, Colette," Lloyd said while returning her smile with one of his own, "You're so lucky, now you actually get to see the world. I wish I could come with you."

"Me too, but it'll be safer this way for you. You can see it after the world's regenerated when there's no Desians."

"Yeah, guess so," Lloyd said as he thought about his dreams of travel, and an idea came to him fuelled by his excitement, "I know, you can come with me. I've been planning to build a boat so I can see the world, but we can travel together after you're done the Journey of Regeneration. I bet you'll know all the best places to visit by then and you can tell me all about what happened on the journey too. I wanna hear everything."

"Y--yeah, that sounds great." "Awesome," Lloyd said thinking of all that would happen after Colette returned.

"Lloyd, Colette, hello," came Genis' familiar voice that interrupted Lloyd's thoughts of what he was going to say next. He turned from Colette to see Genis and Professor Sage emerge from the crowd , Professor Sage carrying a large brown satchel filled with what he knew were supplies for the journey.

"I'm sorry that I'm late," Professor Sage said, facing Colette.

"That's okay," Colette's voice was laced with joy, "You're not even that late, the sun's not that high up yet."

"Still, I would have liked to have made it here earlier. There were a few things that I had to take care of with Genis."

"What'd you have to take care of?" Lloyd asked, eyeing Genis.

"Nothing, I had to talk Raine out of taking a few things along with her."

"What kind of things?"

"All the things that are mine and she's not supposed to touch. She wanted to take my spice set, my pots and pans, practically all of my cooking supplies. I need those."

"I thought that they'd be useful on the Journey of Regeneration," Professor Sage said, sounding a bit put out, "Someone needs to cook."

"And it won't be you. I'm sure Colette or Kratos can cook just fine, you really shouldn't."

"I thought the journey would be a good time to hone my abilities."

"You don't have any abilities to hone."

"You can't cook, Professor?" Lloyd said, feeling amusement rise in his being at this newly found vice of what he had previously thought was his infallible teacher.

"We really should be leaving, we can't stay at the front gates all day," Professor Sage's voice was laced with irritation as she changed the subject, "Lloyd, do you know where your father is?"

"Uh, he went with mom. They wanted to talk to each other a bit before he left."

"Understandable," Professor Sage said while she nodded, "Would you mind going to find your father? We should leave as soon as possible, there's a lot of ground to cover today. And I think that Genis needs a reminder of why it's not proper to talk of things that are meant to be private."

"Uh, sure," Lloyd said, turning away from them crowd, wanting to get as far away from Professor Sage as soon possible. He knew that tone and he felt grateful that her wrath was not directed at him for once.

He found his parents easily enough once he wove his way through the crowd. They were in front of the school, and by the looks of things they were both deep in conversation. Neither of them noticed as Lloyd approached them and he could not help but overhear their conversation as he drew nearer.

"Yeah, I know you will," mom sighed before she continued, "I'm going to miss you so much."

"So you've mentioned."

"I guess I've told you that a bit too much, haven't I? Well I can't help it, I--"

"Anna," dad's voice was laced in exasperation, "Surely these aren't the only reasons that you wanted to talk with me alone. You could have said any one of these things in front of Lloyd."

At the sound of his name Lloyd's movements stilled.

"Yeah, but I might've slipped up and said something that Lloyd shouldn't know. I wanted to be careful."

Something Lloyd shouldn't know? Curiosity coursed through his system. Just what did she mean by that? He wanted to find out. They were too enthralled in their discussion to notice him yet, but that did not mean that it would stay that way. He needed to hide. Especially if he wanted to hear what they were going to talk about.

"That can't be the reason."

His eyes darted quickly across his surroundings, attempting to find anything that held the semblance of a hiding spot when he found something that would do, two big willow trees beside the school.

"You're right, it isn't. I just wanted you to know a few things, I want to say goodbye the right way."

His heart pounded in his chest as he quickly walked towards the trees' cover, being careful to be as silent as possible. He crouched beneath the trees and made sure he was as hidden from their view as possible. Of course, that meant that he could not see them, but that did not matter as he continued to listen to their conversation.

"You already have, we've already said all we need to. There's no need to remind each other of the thoughts we already know."

"I know, but I can't help it. I just--I hate pretending that everything's going to be okay in front of Lloyd."

"I wouldn't call that pretending, we're spending time with him."

"I know but it feels like it is pretending. He doesn't know what's going on and even if I smile I--I just…" mom paused in hesitation, "I feel so torn up inside."

"Shouldn't we enjoy the last moments that we have together?" Dad said and mom did not respond. So that's what they didn't want me to know… Lloyd felt a guilt ridden gloom wash through his system. He did not know that his parents were taking being apart like this. And all he could think about before was how excited he was that they were there with him, "I thought that you were."

"I--I am, really I am. I like being with you and Lloyd like this and for awhile I forgot that you were going away. And…and then it sunk in that I was never gonna see you again and you were gonna be all alone and--"

"Don't…" dad said softly and Lloyd strained to hear the rest of his words in vain. And there was nothing to be heard after and as much as he strained to hear either of his parents voices, he could not.

Lloyd allowed the thoughts of the conversation to process in his mind as he remained in his crouched position hiding beneath the trees. He had no idea before that mom was taking dad's departure so badly and dad…well he sounded sad too. He did not want dad to leave mom here if she was going to feel like that. Come to think of it, he did not want dad to leave either. There's nothing I can do, Lloyd thought as he shifted from his crouched position in his hiding spot in the brush and stretched, feeling sore at the uncomfortable position he had forced himself in, But maybe I can do something to cheer them up. Worth a shot, anyways.

With that thought in mind, he stepped from his cover behind the trees and walked towards the rose his gaze from the ground towards their direction, about to say something to draw their attention. He froze. There was a reason that there was no more conversation between them and all of his good intentions were forgotten to him as he stared at them. Both of them were…embracing. And kissing. There were his parents. Kissing. A disgust coursed through his being and as much as he wanted to look away from them, he could not. His legs refused to move, his mind refused to operate. And all he could do was stare.

"Lloyd," mom's voice was laced in surprise as she spoke when her eyes caught his. Lloyd counted his blessings, they had stopped it. And before he could register it in his mind, they were both by his side.

"Are you okay?"

"What--me? Oh, yeah, I--I'm just fine."

Dad chuckled and shook his head, his features etched in amusement, "I'm sure you'll recover."

"U--uh, I guess so."

"So how's Colette doing?"

"Oh, she's doing great. She seems really happy about leaving for the Journey of Regeneration," Lloyd said, forgetting about what he had just witnessed at the question. But then he suddenly remembered the reason that he had come to search for his parents in the first place, "Oh yeah, they're waiting for you to show up, dad. Professor Sage told me to get you."

"I guess we shouldn't wait any longer," mom said, looking from Lloyd to dad, "You can't stay here forever."

"No, I can't," dad's voice was laced in a subtle sobriety, "Anna, would you mind going to the gates without Lloyd and I? I'd like to have a few words with him."

"Alright. I'll tell them that you'll be a little bit longer," Mom looked at each of them and smiled before she turned away from them and disappeared within the crowd.

"How much did you hear?"

"You knew that I was there," Lloyd felt shock course through him, "But…but how?"

"You were standing away from the direction of the crowd. If you had seen us just as you were coming to find us, you would have been standing there," dad gestured towards the crowd, "And not in the opposite direction."

"O--oh. Does mom know?"

"I doubt it," dad said, and then repeated with a stronger emphasis, "How much did you hear?"

"I--I could barely hear anything," he said, fearing a verbal lashing from his father. Dad's eyes narrowed and Lloyd knew immediately that he did not believe him, "I, uh, well I guess I heard a little more then that."

"Lloyd," dad sighed, and then continued, "I'm not going to punish you for eavesdropping."

"You're not?"

"No, I'm not. I simply want to know what you heard."

"Mom sounded really sad when she was talking to you," Lloyd said without thinking, "And so did you. She's really going to miss you, huh."

"So you heard that much," dad said and paused, contemplating something unknown to Lloyd, "You have to understand that this is the first time in a long time that your mother and I will be apart. It's natural for us to be upset."

"But wouldn't it be easier for everyone if I just went on the Journey of Regeneration too? Then you and mom could stay together and I'd get to know you and--"

"Nice try, Lloyd. The journey is far too dangerous for you. Now I want you to do something for me while I'm away, something that only you can do."

"What is it?"

"I want you to take care of your mother for me while I'm gone. Make her happy."

"No problem, I can do that," Lloyd said feeling a determination surge through him at what he could do, "When you come back, mom'll be way happier."

"Thank you," dad said while he smiled, "Now I know that your mother is uncertain of her skills, but I know that she can help you grow stronger and become more skilful with your blade."

"Oh yeah, that's right. I'm going to get training lessons from mom," the excitement that was forgotten now coursed through him again, "I can't wait. I'm going to try to be as strong as you."

A warm hand rested on Lloyd's head before he realized that it had gotten there, and he knew that it was dad's. His hand moved about Lloyd's hair, ruffling it gently and Lloyd felt an odd mix of emotions rise in him at dad's sign of affection.

"If you train properly I know that you will grow strong, perhaps as strong as me someday."

"You think so?"

"Yes," dad said, gazing at him with features that were etched in pride, and sighed as he ruffled his hair once more before he drew his hand away, "I suppose we've kept the Chosen waiting long enough. We should get going."

"Guess you're right," Lloyd said. Dad started walking towards the crowd and Lloyd followed him.

Somehow it was not as bad walking through the crowd with his father, finally catching up with him enough to walk a steady pace beside him. Villagers cast both of them side-long glances, probably muttering to themselves that the boy raised by a dwarf was with his real father, but Lloyd did not care. He wove his way around them towards the main gates where his mom and his friends were.

"Well I suppose we're all here now," Professor Sage was the first to speak, not wasting time with any small talk, "There's no reason to stay here any longer."

"I agree. We've dawdled for much longer then I would have liked. There's much ground to cover before night falls."

"O--okay then. Let's get going," Colette said and she turned around before she hesitated and turned to Lloyd, "Oh, that's right, I almost forgot to say goodbye to you."

"Bye, Colette. I'll miss you, you dork."

"Yeah," she said as she giggled, "I'll miss you too."

"Kratos, I…before you leave," mom said hesitantly, catching dad's attention, "Just…don't forget my love for you."

"What an odd thing to say. Especially considering what you've told me."

"I married you, didn't I? That's got to mean something. Just don't forget it, okay?"

"As long as you do the same. Goodbye Anna," dad said and his eyes turned to Lloyd, "Goodbye Lloyd."

"Bye dad."

He turned from mom and joined Colette and Professor Sage as the three of them began the journey to regenerate the world. He absently heard villagers call out their wishes of good luck to the Chosen and their farewells but he barely paid attention to that. He watched the three of them walk on the weatherworn path that led outside of Iselia that would lead them to adventures that Lloyd could only imagine. And he did not tear his eyes away from them as their figures got smaller and smaller as they walked on, the early morning sun playing with their shadows so that they were larger and moved in time to their counterparts.

"Goodbye, Kratos," mom whispered. Lloyd turned to her, watching as she stared mesmerized by their shadows playing on the earth and venturing on a path that she could not follow.

"Uh, mom? I don't think he could hear you."

"No, he heard me. I'm sure of it," she shook her head and she turned to him, her lips curved in a slight smile, "Now, I bet you want to start that training now, don't you?"

_"Though so fast I turn away_

_You know I watch your shadow play_

_Hey…_

_Don't forget my love_

_Don't forget my love for you"_


	8. Reconnection

_Disclaimer: Still don't own Tales of Symphonia._

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* * *

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_Reconnection_

_Clang. _Birds flew in a flurry from the trees that they resided in as the metallic sound of two swords colliding resonated throughout the forest clearing. This sound rang in Lloyd's ears but was quickly overridden by the pounding of his frantic heart. That close. Too close. Of all things to happen, he had not expected that. Mom had rushed him with no warning and with movements that blurred. It was through his instincts alone that he threw up his arms in some semblance of a defence.

"Wrong guard, Lloyd," mom said as her blade continued to bear onto both of his own, "It should've been the tierce."

"Yeah," Lloyd said between his short gasps for air, "That's the guard where…you defend from an attack from above, right?"

"Close. But I'm sure that you'll remember to use that one after this."

Shock coursed through him as his feet slowly dug into the dirt of the forest floor and she bore against his swords with more strength then he expected her to use. Lloyd gritted his teeth and his muscles became taut as he continued his shaky defence. Each moment passed in seeming slow motion and his muscles burned more and more in pain that only increased. _I could always give up,_ he thought absently as sweat dripped from his brow and stung his eyes. Then he could receive the relief that his muscles screamed for. But that idea was extinguished from his mind before it ever took any real hold. That was _not_ an option. He refused to just give up, there had to be another way to get out of it. And with that determination he drew his gaze towards her.

Mom's eyes had lost the gentle warmth that he was accustomed to seeing in them, they were instead hardened with intensity that was brought on by the battle. She was taking this seriously even if it was just a training session. And so should he. _She's waiting for me to make the next move,_ he thought with that strange sense of insight that came to him in times like this. His mind scrambled to form a plan, any plan, to get out of the compromising position. _No. No thinking, not now_, he thought in a silent revelation, _I need to do something._

With that thought in mind he readied himself to move one of his sword's from his defence when he felt an ephemeral warmth flow throughout his body. It was familiar, this warmth, he knew that. He had felt it before at the temple yesterday. _Is that from…my exesphere?_ Somehow in a way that he could not explain he knew that it was. So in movements quicker then he thought himself capable of he moved one of his sword's from the guard and shot it towards her.

But these movements were not as fast as hers.

His attack was deflected. This he knew as he felt her sword bear down against the one that he attacked with. His mind barely had the time to comprehend her actions, or even think of a countermeasure against it as a sharp pain stabbed through his arm when she bore down against his sword even more harshly then before. He grimaced and staggered backwards, the pain now intensified in his arm by the second because of her strength and because of his muscles that now ached from the constant physical abuse. This pain fed through his mind until nothing else seemed to matter and his eyes tightened so much so that he took in none of his surroundings. He loosened his grip on his sword. It barely registered in his mind that warm fingers brushed against that hand that was so strained.

And then his sword was gone.

It happened so suddenly and now there was nothing to cause his muscles strain. He straightened his posture, feeling the lingering painful effects of the fight throughout his whole body. Relief flew through his mind as he was relieved of the pain he had endured, but this relief was quickly replaced by confusion. One of his swords was gone. His gaze shifted from the ground and to mom who stood under the shade of a fir tree on the outskirts of the forest clearing while holding two swords, and one of them he knew was his.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Lloyd felt shock course through him by the inherent anger that laced her voice. She sounded so angry and he had no idea why. Come to think of it, she looked angry too. Her features were etched in outrage, the likes of which that Lloyd had never seen his mother possess, "Do you know what that attack would've done to me?"

"Attack?" Lloyd asked, wondering what she meant. His mind raced back to the fight before and recognition clicked into his head. He felt an offence rise in him at the implications of her words, "You've got nothing to worry about, that wouldn't have done anything to you. I would've drawn back before it--"

"I don't care how much control that you think you have," mom responded with a harsh tinge to her voice. Her face was set in a rigid semblance of calm with her mouth in a hard line. There was no trace of the familiar gentle emotional etching to her features and that was what tipped Lloyd off to know that she was really pissed. She never looked like that before, "You weren't going to stop that attack. And you know what that would've done."

"What! There's no way I'd let that happen, I'm not stupid, you know," Lloyd said, feeling an anger of his own rise in him as the implications of her words sunk in. What type of person did mom think he was? He would not just recklessly endanger her, "I'm not just gonna attack you like you were a monster."

"You've got a funny way of showing it. If I didn't deflect that attack I would've got seriously injured. It could've even killed me."

"I told you that wouldn't let that happen. I would've--"

"I don't think you understand," mom's voice was laced with practically no emotion, but he got the feeling that there was an undercurrent of anger running beneath that emotionless facade. He was not used undercurrents in people's words, least of all with mom's, "With the mana in your body and that exesphere of yours infusing power into your attack, it would've been next to impossible to snap it back even if you wanted to."

"I…" A realization struck him at the truth and logic behind her words as he stared into mom's eyes that were hardened in a justified anger. She was right, "B--but you have an exesphere too and you attacked me."

"Yes, but I never used the strength that my exesphere gives me to the fullest extent. I held back."

"You held back?" Lloyd felt an offence rise in him that mom would even think to do that.

"It's a training session, Lloyd," mom's voice held a serious note and Lloyd could finally place her emotionless tone to something else. It was like the tone that the Professor would use during one of her lectures, "The goal is for you to learn, not for me to show off."

"But you were showing off before. You wouldn't let up."

"That was because you used the wrong guard. I thought it'd be better if you remembered why it's important to use the right one. Looking back it probably wasn't the best thing to do," mom sighed and paused before continuing on with that same lecturing tone, "You have to be very careful with your exesphere, Lloyd. It's special, you know, it gives you more power."

"My exesphere," Lloyd brought his hand up to look at the azure stone embedded in his hand but his mind was elsewhere. He felt a guilt wash over him about his attack before, the one that he knew was fuelled by his exesphere and his mana. He remembered the warmth he felt before, that had to mean that he did use his exesphere and mana just like mom said. But would he have been able to stop the attack if mom did not block it? His mind tore back to the situation, trying to remember exactly how he felt when the quick movements happened. He was running off instinct then and he was not so sure he would have stopped. And that fact scared him, "I…I'm sorry."

"Hey, I know you are," mom's voice softened and a slight emotion finally touched her features, "Just don't do it again, okay?"

"I won't," Lloyd said with absolution and felt his guilt lessen, but not vanish. What he almost did, he had to make sure it never happened again. He screwed up bad. He had just found his mom and he almost hurt her, she even said she could have died. Thoughts flooded his mind of mom not trusting him or thinking he was a bad son or disliking him because of what he almost did, "I didn't mean to do that, you know. I wasn't trying to hurt you or anything--"

"I know that, sweetie," mom said and her voice was laced in a gentle sympathy. And Lloyd felt that he was very much forgiven under her soothing gaze. Suddenly her expression changed to one of amusement, "It wasn't even that hard to deflect your attack. Your form was clumsy."

"Clumsy?" Lloyd felt an offence and annoyance course through him at the comment, "My form's not clumsy."

"Normally it isn't, no, but that thrust was actually pretty clumsy. That's why I could take your sword so easily," mom said as she smiled. The offence vanished in the face of that smile, Lloyd knew what she was doing, she was just teasing him now. Mom walked from beneath the shadow of the fir tree into the sunlight towards him, holding his sword out in front of her, "Speaking of which, I bet you want it back now, right?"

"Thanks, mom," Lloyd said returning the smile as he walked towards her and took the sword from her grasp by the hilt. She sheathed her sword soon after and he did the same with both of his, sensing that their training session had drawn to a close. Even though mom was still smiling at him there was still something that was bothering him that he could not shake, "So you think that my Sonic Thrust is a bad attack."

" 'Sonic Thrust'?" Mom repeated with amusement lacing her voice and her eyes glimmered in the light of the mid-morning sun, "You name your attacks?"

"Well, yeah, but I only name the good ones," Lloyd felt slightly put out at her amusement that he thought was at his expense, "So far my good ones are Demon Fang and Sonic Thrust. Well…maybe not Sonic Thrust anymore. I can't believe it, I practiced it so much before I thought for sure that it'd work in battle. Guess not."

"Now I wouldn't go that far, it is a good attack in essence. You just use your mana and exesphere to enhance a standard thrust attack," mom paused in contemplation, "I know, I bet it didn't work well this time because your concentration was split between guarding and attacking."

"So," Lloyd began sorting the logic of her words in his head while feeling an odd desire rise in him for mom's approval, "You're saying that it's not a bad attack?"

"It's not a bad attack," she said with a hint of smile in her voice and she tilted her head to the side, "Just don't attack me with that one next time, okay? I think this calls for a rule for any training sessions in the future: no attacks that are enhanced by your mana or exesphere abilities. It's way too dangerous, especially with your exesphere, who knows what'll happen."

Lloyd nodded feeling the importance of the rule and he turned his gaze back to the exesphere embedded on his hand. It did not look like it was anything special, he thought, as he watched it glimmer in the sunlight that streamed through the trees branches above. But mom kept on saying that there was something different about this one and he could not stem the curiosity that coursed through his mind as to why.

"Hey, mom," Lloyd began. Mom knew so much, that she must know the answers about the exesphere, "Do you know why this exesphere is so different?"

"Yes. Don't you remember what your father and I told you about the Angelus Project?"

"Yeah, I remember all that but what I really want to know is why's it's so different. What makes it so much more special then any other exesphere?"

Mom stared at him before she answered and he saw a smile grow on her face as her eyes glinted in humour in the sunlight, "These are some pretty insightful questions. I didn't know you had it in you."

"Hey, what's that supposed to mean?" Lloyd said, feeling an annoyance and shock rise in him. He knew Genis made fun of his intelligence, but mom?

"I was only teasing you, I didn't mean anything by it," mom said and her eyes were alit in a greater humour as her smile grew, "No need to look so down."

"Okay, okay," Lloyd's voice was laced in impatience even though he felt the annoyance of her words leave him, "But still, why's it so different?"

"Well, I guess I've got to answer now. The thing is, the Angelus Project was designed to create a special Cru--" mom stopped herself before she continued, "a special exesphere that can grow along with the user."

"An exesphere that can grow? What do you mean? Like…it gets bigger?" Lloyd turned his gaze back to his exesphere, attempting to make sense of it, "I don't think this thing grew that much while I had it."

"That's not what I meant by grow, Lloyd," mom said with a smile and a stifled laugh. Her smile began to fade as she paused and shifted from foot to foot, "I meant that the exesphere's abilities grows with the user. It gets more powerful the more that you use it, so that you can tap into that and become more powerful in turn."

"Isn't that like a normal exesphere? They enhance abilities and make you stronger."

"Yes, but normal exespheres don't grow in power, they stay the same," it was weird, even though mom was explaining something to him, her voice did not hold that lecturing tone from earlier. It sounded almost like she was trying her best not to sound sad. But he was probably imagining things, "That's the difference between that special exesphere and a normal one. It's why the Desians were after it for so long, it's the only one that was actually created successfully."

"Oh, so that's why the Desians want it so bad," Lloyd's voice was laced in bitterness and he felt an anger unfold inside himself, the same anger that always overcame whenever the Desians were mentioned, "I hate that, just thinking what they did to you to try to make one."

"They didn't try to make one, they did. I'm just grateful that I survived that thing. There were times when I was so…" mom's voice started to break before she paused and bit her lip. Lloyd felt his anger at the Desians intensify, they were the ones that still made mom sad. They might even scare her still. He loathed that, "But that doesn't matter anymore. What matters now is that you have that exesphere and not them and that I actually survived that thing. We're together now, right? We should be grateful."

"Yeah…you're right," Lloyd said at a loss for words at mom's tone of voice. She sounded so sad again, even through the words that he knew were supposed to cheer him up. The words that dad had told him echoed through his mind. _Make her happy. _She was not happy now, thanks to the Desians and he knew that dad's departure probably made even worse. So far, Lloyd was not making her happy. Not yet, anyways. He began to walk closer to mom, towards the sunlit part of the clearing that mom stood in until the sunlight engulfed him. A determination surged through himself to do exactly what he had promised his father.

"Lloyd, I--" mom stopped herself and she looked at him again through uncertain eyes. His movements stilled and the sun glared in the corner of his eye but he did not care, "Do you know how exespheres are created?"

"Not really, all I know is that they amplify a person's abilities. Do you know? Are they found in mines or something?"

"Sort of. There's something about the nature of exespheres that I think you should know about," mom said with a slight smile, but her eyes retained that same sorrow. She did not continue right away, and she stared at him while lost in her thoughts. He did not interrupt her reverie as his mind raced to all of the possibilities of what the real nature of the exespheres were, "But I think that's something that you should find out some other time."

"Another time?" Lloyd felt a disappointment course through his being and he knew it leaked into his voice, "Why not now?"

"No, not yet. I don't think that you should know now. But…someday, okay?"

"Why's that? Is it really so bad that you can't tell me now?"

"Yes, it is that bad. Trust me on this. Just be happy that I'm not going to lie to you, I did think about it."

"You were gonna lie to me?" Lloyd felt a jolted shock run through him.

"Sometimes the truth is crueller then a lie," mom's voice sounded distant and somehow reminiscent. Her eyes looked as if they were staring past him, lost in some other memory, "But I don't want to lie to you, not about everything. Even if it is cruel…okay?"

When her eyes no longer mirrored that sense of being lost and focused in on him, Lloyd's eyes widened in a shock that mirrored the emotions that roiled through him. Her eyes were so melancholic and pleading and shaped in such an emotional intensity that it almost made him take a step back. Did she look like that just because of the exespheres? Something inside of himself told him that it was more then that. There was some kind of deep sadness in mom, that much was obvious to Lloyd even if he had no real grounds for thinking it. He just knew. And he hated that she felt that way now.

"Okay, mom, don't worry about it. You'll tell me when you're ready," Lloyd finally said after finding a voice through his shock. Mom's features were etched in relief, but there was still more then just the traces of melancholy that remained in her eyes. Lloyd wracked his brain for something, anything that would get her mind off of whatever it was that was making her look that way, "Say mom, I think we forgot about having breakfast, your probably really hungry by now, huh."

"Hungry?" Her expression was bewildered and she paused before answering, "I--I think your right, I do feel hungry. I really feel hungry," mom smiled, and her features finally lost that melancholic expression, "It's been so long."

"I know, me too. I don't think I've eaten since yesterday. Poor dad, he had to travel all morning on an empty stomach."

"Somehow I think your father is just fine right now."

"How come? He's probably starving."

"Well, I don't think that he'd change ou--" mom cut herself off before continuing, "He's always been good at going without food, I'm sure that he's fine. He actually used to let me eat his share whenever our rations were running low when I was pregnant with you."

"Really?" Lloyd said, completely disregarding what she had almost said beforehand in the face of this newfound knowledge, "Wow, I wonder how dad did it. I don't think I could go without eating."

"Now it didn't happen all the time, only when it was necessary. Your father said that it was for a good cause. He always told me that it was because I was eating for two, so I couldn't complain about getting his share," mom said as she laughed lightly and she smiled absently at the memory, "He was right, of course. We couldn't have you born with any problems that could've been fixed by eating right. He was always so thoughtful back then."

"Like how he is now, right?"

"Right," mom said with that same reminiscent smile and her eyes fell back into the melancholy that they held earlier for a brief moment before it was hidden again, "Now, did you mention food to remind your poor mother she's starving, or are we going to eat?"

"Oh yeah," Lloyd said, finally realizing his momentary lapse, he had almost forgotten the whole reason he had brought up breakfast in the first place. He brought his hand to the back of his head, "Sorry about that, guess I forgot."

"That's fine, Lloyd. Just tell me that you have something in mind to eat."

"Ah, yeah, I do but it won't be fancy or anything. Dad probably didn't save anything he cooked for breakfast and I can't really cook…but I think I can make a sandwich okay."

"A sandwich?" mom said with a smile, a genuine smile with no traces of melancholy. Lloyd smiled back, feeling a silent triumph within himself, "I think that I'd like a sandwich of yours. It's been a long time since I've had one."

"It has? Great, I'll make it good, I know I can do it," Lloyd felt an excitement surge through him at the idea.

Mom laughed, "First I think that we need to get to Dirk's house before you can amaze me with your sandwich making skills."

"Oh yeah," Lloyd said as he began to walk across the ground, mindful to avoid the underbrush and trees towards the dirt path that would lead him to dad's house. He heard mom crush the dead twigs and grass as she followed him, "Well, you won't have to wait long, I don't think we're that far away from dad's house."

"No, we aren't," mom said as she kept pace beside him, losing his vision for a moment as she walked along the other side of a tree, "I made sure to pick a training spot that was close to it, just in case."

"In case of what?"

"Anything," mom said and Lloyd's movements stilled as he stepped onto the dirt path, waiting for mom to join him. She stepped above a particularly large bush and onto the path, "Besides, since it's near his house it means that we can find this place quicker and train more often. We were lucky that we found such a good clearing with flat ground so close."

"Is flat ground important for training, mom?"

"I'd say so. I bet you aren't used to fighting on rugged terrain, it'd just make it way too hard for you."

"Oh," Lloyd's voice was laced in a sudden understanding, "So that's what you were looking for before when we were finding a spot."

"Yeah, I guess I didn't make that clear, did I?" mom said with a small smile as they both began to walk on the weatherworn path in the direction that would lead to dad's house, "I'm sorry, I'm just not good at things like this."

"What are you talking about? Of course you are. You didn't have to tell me what you were looking for in a training spot."

"I think I should've. And I also should've laid out ground rules before we started and we probably should've practiced those guards before we tried a practice battle," mom trailed off and began mumbling to herself as she turned her eyes from Lloyd to the path ahead of herself. She pursed her lips as she brought a hand to her chin in what Lloyd took as contemplation and her voice raised slightly above the other inaudible murmurings, "We have a lot of work to do. Kratos makes this look easy…"

Lloyd did not bother mom as she remained lost in her thoughts and turned his attention to whatever lay in front of him. He saw the dapples of the sunlight spill across the dirt trodden path and the trees that surrounded it swayed in the gentle breeze. His thoughts turned to nothing in particular and he became in tune to the steady sound of his boots clomping against the ground.

It took less time then he realized to reach dad's house. The gentle rush of water from the small river reached his ears and as he rounded a curve in the path he took in the sight of the small wooden cabin that he knew as his home. He walked leisurely across the wooden bridge that was set above the languidly moving waters and his eyes turned to mom. She stared ahead of herself and she still looked as if she were lost in her thought so he opted not to bother her.

"Ah, hello, you two," came dad's familiar voice and Lloyd's eyes snapped from mom to where it came from, feeling his heart pound lightly in surprise, "Welcome back."

"It's good to be back. Hello, Dirk."

"Oh, hey dad," Lloyd's original surprise vanished and he smiled as he drew his attention towards the voice and saw the dwarf sitting on a wooden bench. Lloyd walked across the cobbled stone path and closer to dad, knowing that mom was walking by his side.

"Now how did that training session of yours go?" Dad said as he got up from the bench.

"It went great, way better then I was expecting," Lloyd's voice was laced in enthusiasm and he turned to mom expectantly, "Right mom?"

"Now I wouldn't go that far," mom said with an uneasy smile, "Remember what happened? We both got a little carried away. I think I still need to work on how I teach you before we try that again."

"Well, it's going to be tomorrow, right?" Lloyd felt hope course through his system and he knew she would not disappoint him. Mom's eyes were shaped in apprehension as she stared back at him and she sighed.

"Alright, Lloyd," she said with a small smile. Lloyd felt the hope magnify into joy, "Tomorrow it is. But I'm not promising that it's going to be any better then what it was today."

"Are you kidding me? Today's was great," Lloyd said with that same enthusiasm lacing his voice, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I stole your sword," mom said with a completely flat tone of voice and her hand moved onto her hip, "And you did that attack you did. You don't think that those things make up a bad lesson?"

"Oh, yeah," Lloyd said bringing a hand to the back of his head, "Well I still think it was a good session. Best one I ever had."

"The only one you've ever had. You don't have anything else to compare it to, Lloyd," mom's voice was laced in amusement and her smile grew, "But I guess we'll both learn this training business together, one step at a time."

"Good to hear you two getting along," dad said as he chuckled lightly. He turned his attention towards Lloyd, "How did those swords I gave you hold up, Lloyd?"

"Oh, they held up great. They were heavier then I'm used to, but they worked so much better," Lloyd said, feeling a pride at his father for making the swords that he used. He felt a sudden disappointment course through him as he realized what dad may want by mentioning the swords, "But I bet you want them back now, right?"

"Naw, you can keep them," dad said and Lloyd felt a thrill course through him, "You're going to be training more often, and it wouldn't do to use those wooden swords against her steel one. Think of them as a gift."

"Thanks, dad," _This is awesome, _Lloyd thought and his hands moved to grasp the hilts of his swords, _my first real swords._

"Ah, don't mention it," dad said as his features were etched in pride and his eyes glinted in joy. His features quickly changed as if from an internal revelation and his gaze shifted to mom, "Anna, now do you mind if I ask you something?"

"No, not at all," mom said with confusion lacing her voice, "What is it?"

"I think it might be best if I told you alone."

"You want me to leave?" Lloyd said with scepticism lacing his voice as he felt both of their gazes on him at once and a slight anger rose in him at that, "Why can't I stay?"

"It's something that I want to speak to your mother about. That's all you need to know," dad said and Lloyd felt the anger solidify at the comment. Dad was not even going to tell him what they were going to talk about.

"Don't worry about it, Lloyd," mom said while she smiled as if sensing his anger and he met her eyes that reflected in joy. He felt her warm hand come to his arm as she squeezed it gently in comfort, "Think about it, you'll have some time to make those sandwiches you were raving about."

"Yeah, you're right," Lloyd said and he smiled back at her feeling his previous disappointment dissipate. At the mention of food he felt a wave of hunger run through him and he wanted nothing more then to get food, "Uh, what type do you want, anyway?"

"It doesn't matter," she said as her eyes shone in the sunlight and she drew her hand away, "Just make me whatever you want. Oh, I know, how about your favourite sandwich. I wonder if it's the same as when you were little."

"Well, I like--"

"No, no, don't tell me. That ruins the fun," she said and her eyes were alit in humour, "I want to know if I'm right later."

"Okay, mom," Lloyd's voice was laced in amusement at what she had just said. He was not quite sure what was so fun about it remembering his favourite sandwich, but that did not really matter.

Lloyd turned from both of them and walked towards the wooden cabin and saw a rose bush that had not flowered yet in the corner of his eye in an area he had no interest to note. As he opened the door that led to the familiar one-roomed floor curiosity built inside himself at whatever it was that they were going to talk about without him. It could be anything, he thought as he closed the door behind him and walked across the room towards the pantry.

Who knows, they might be talking about some long lost sister that could be dead or alive that they did not want him to know about. He opened the pantry door which revealed shelves upon shelves of food and he entered the small, darkened room. Or maybe they were talking about the Desians. Maybe they came earlier and found out about mom and wanted to take her away. A shudder ran down his spine at that as he scanned the shelves for what he would need. No, that could not be it. It was not possible.

They might even be talking about him. Lloyd gulped at that thought and he felt apprehension rise in his being as he searched across the various shelves of the pantry for anything that could make a sandwich. They could be talking about his exesphere. Lloyd glanced briefly to the exesphere that was embedded on his hand and shook his head. This was getting ridiculous, he decided, and he pushed those thoughts from his mind and replaced them to thoughts of sandwiches. He had to make a good one for mom after all. One at a time he spotted what he needed and he took it from the shelf and into his arms. He stepped out of the pantry and headed towards the table before he dropped everything he had onto the wooden table.

He pulled out a chair and sat down as he did what he needed to methodically, attempting to use the sandwiches to keep the thoughts from his mind. But still, what were they talking about? It had to be about him, otherwise they would have let him listen in. _Well that did not take long_, he thought as he fumbled with the sandwich contents, _I couldn't stop thinking about it._ There was no way to stem the curiosity that rose in his being now.

The sound of the door swinging open disrupted his thoughts and Lloyd's eyes snapped in that direction. Mom walked inside and dad followed soon after her. She turned to him with a look that look made his actions still. Her eyes retained a hardened resolve, completely opposite from the mirth that they retained earlier. Lloyd felt a further curiosity rise in his being, know whatever it was that made mom look like that now was whatever they had talked about. She remained silent.

"What is it mom?" Lloyd asked, and he felt a mixture of fear and anxiety rise in him at her expression. Her features revealed none of her emotions, just like before during the training session.

"Lloyd, Dirk told me why you went to the ranch yesterday."

"The ranch?" Lloyd felt a slight anger rise in his being. They were not here to gang up against him now, were they? "You're not mad that I--"

"No, I'm not mad at you, not at all. Actually, I'm proud that you did such a thing for someone that you didn't even know."

"You are?" Lloyd's mind flashed in confusion. He was not expecting that. He should be getting a lecture about maintaining the non-aggression treaty right about now.

"I am. I'm proud that you asked for a keycrest," her emotionless façade broke and she smiled, her eyes reflecting that pride, "Dirk made it, you know."

"He did?" Lloyd felt an unorthodox rage rise in him and he turned to dad, "Then why didn't you--"

"Lloyd, don't act like that," mom's tone was slightly harsh, "He was only asking me what I felt about it. He didn't know if I'd be okay with you going to the ranch to give it to her. Being near a human ranch is dangerous, after all."

"Oh," the anger that he felt previously dissipated and he felt an apprehension replace it at the implications of those words. He felt a satisfaction run through him of her concern that ran through her words, but at the same time he wanted to go, "You're going to let me go to the ranch, right?"

"Yes," she said but the apprehension inside of himself did not dissipate as quickly as the anger had. Her features did not break that emotionless façade, "But I'm going with you. I want to make sure that you get out of this alright. The Desians are dangerous. If you're not careful you could get captured by them or they could take that special exesphere of yours. You could even die. But it's not good to turn a blind eye to those that are suffering either. That's…inexcusable no matter the reason," mom said with such intensity lacing her voice and Lloyd got the impression that there was something else that was fuelling her words, "We should help those that are in front of us."

"Yeah," Lloyd said, feeling a pride rise in him as his mother's words sunk in. She was not like the rest of the villagers that kept on ignoring the ranch, "We should get going now."

"Don't you think that we should eat first?" Mom said and a small smile broke that emotionless façade, "You already made those sandwiches. It'd be a shame to waste them."

"Lloyd!"

Lloyd was interrupted mid sentence and he felt alarm rise in him at the desperation in that familiar voice. Lloyd drew his gaze away from mom and towards the path that would lead him to the Iselia and the ranch. Towards the direction of that desperate cry. It was Genis. He was running down the path, and it looked faster then Lloyd had ever seen him run. He reached them and stopped. Hunching over the ground, both hands were leaning on his knees as he gasped for breath.

"Genis, what is it?" Lloyd asked as he felt a confusion and concern and panic course through him at this unusual sight of his best friend, "What's wrong?"

"I…it's just…" Genis said between his gasps for breath before he lifted his head and locked his gaze with Lloyd, his eyes wide in fear and desperation, "They took Marble!"

"What!" Lloyd said feeling a shock course through him and an anger unfurled inside of himself, "The Desians."

"Genis where did they take her?" mom's voice was calm and retained none of that shock and anger that Lloyd felt roiling inside of himself.

"I--Iselia," Genis' voice was laced in a fear despite his hectic breathing. Although his breathing steadied by every passing moment, a fear and panic laced his voice, "They all went to Iselia, so many of them. And they took Marble! I don't know what they want with her, I couldn't hear what they were saying. I just wanted to talk to her again and…and then…"

"They're not going to do anything to her or Iselia. We're going," Lloyd said, feeling the anger harden in a determined resolve. There was no way he was going to let the Desians destroy the town that he had grown up in, "We've got to stop them before they--"

"No," mom's voice was hardened in a determination as well and Lloyd turned to her. A shock and anger flared up inside of himself again, "You boys go back to Dirk's and stay there. I'm going to go take care of the Desians."

"What," Lloyd felt a further shock course through him, "I'm not going to do that."

"Don't argue with me, Lloyd," mom said and her features retained that emotionless expression yet again, "I'm your mother, I know what's best for you."

"What? That's not true!" his voice was laced in an anger, "The Desians are dangerous! I'm not just gonna let you face them--"

"I know how to handle the Desians, I've had a lot of experience with them. More then you know. I don't want you facing them again, you're the one that could get hurt. You and Genis," her hardened gaze shifted between the both of them, "You're both too young. Don't worry about me, I'll be fine."

"No you won't, I know what the Desians do. They kill people and they rip their lives apart and they try to make it so people never see their kids again," Lloyd's voice was laced with bitterness and an even greater anger unfurled inside of himself, "I'm not just going to let you go to them alone. You could really die this time! Or they cold take you to make another one of those damned exespheres."

"The Desians aren't going to kill me and I'm not going back to the Angelus Project. I'm not going to die, I'll be fine. What's important is that you both get far away from them. I'll handle everything."

"No way, mom! Your just one person--"

"You have to protect that special exesphere, right Lloyd? They could take it from you."

"What's that worth if--"

"The longer we stand here arguing, the more time the Desians get to destroy Iselia."

She was right. Lloyd knew it as he gazed into mom's eyes that were hardened in a stubborn determination. There would be no arguing now, she had made up her mind. And the longer that they stood here, the less time the people in Iselia had. The less time Marble had.

"Okay, mom. I'll do what you say. Go."

She merely nodded in affirmation before she turned and ran down the path that led to Iselia. Lloyd watched her as she disappeared from his line of vision.

"Lloyd, what do you think you're you doing?" Genis asked with a quiet voice, "You're just letting her go alone?"

"I never said that," Lloyd said, staring at Genis' features that were etched in surprise, "Do you really think that I'm going to let my own mom face the Desians alone?"


	9. Blood Banishment

_Blood Banishment_

The forest was but a blur about Anna as she ran across the well-trodden dirt path that unravelled in front of her. Thoughts refused to form in her mind save the one that had remained a constant to her. She had to stop the Desians from giving life to their violent ambitions in Iselia and so she continued her frantic pursuit.

Until there was a scream.

With that scream all of her senses came tumbling to her consciousness all at once. _Thump, thump, thump. _She could hear the frenzied beating of her heart as loudly as if it were in her head and not in her chest. Her breath was ragged and shallow as her muscles screamed in protest of being pushed too far, too fast. But she had to get there and it was that thought alone that continued to fuel her mind as she ran.

The wooden entrance gates of Iselia came into her vision sooner then she had expected but what lay beneath those gates caused her movements to still entirely. Horror and shock coursed through her system as her breath caught in her throat. Blood gushed from two men's bodies that lay haphazardly among the dirt and grass and insects. _They were shown no mercy,_ she thought dismally as she continued to stare at them.

Anna dug her nails into the palm of her hand and a stinging pain shot from it. She moved her fingers about her palms and she felt her blood beneath her fingertips as a realization struck her. She could _not_ just stand there staring at their bodies in a horrified contemplation. That would not bring them back and it would do nothing to stop the Desians from their violence. She had to do what they could not; she had to stop the Desians so that no one else had to have their futures cut short.

Anna brought her gaze from the men to beyond the gates and stepped into Iselia. In the village square a group of Desians immediately caught her vision and she walked towards them with determination embracing her mind as her hand went instinctively to the hilt of her sword. As she got closer she noticed that a few of them were surrounding a woman dressed in rags. _That must the woman Lloyd was talking about. That must be Marble_, she thought as her pace quickened towards them and she opened her mouth, about to call out to stop them. A Desian approached Marble and grasped her hand and ripped the exsphere from her skin quicker then Anna could react to. Her heart stopped. She was too late.

Marble's movements stilled because she was paralyzed in a pain that Anna knew all too well. Marble's eyes reflected that pain and her mouth was open to form a scream that never came as her skin began to distil from her natural skin tone and took a colour unnatural to that of any human. Unpleasant memories uncoiled in Anna's mind of the pain and fear of the past.

"_No!" the scream of her beloved met Anna's ears. "Anna, no!"_

_She wanted to comfort him, to tell him to leave and forget about her and run _

_but her lips refused to move. An indescribable pain more powerful then anything she had ever experienced erupted inside of her body and spread. There was not an inch of her body that was free from the searing pain that made it feel as if her insides were being ripped to shreds and her skin was on fire. She could not think. She could not breath. She could not feel. And all she knew was pain. _

Anna snapped from the memory and back to reality with a jolt. The same thing that had happened to her was happening now and there was nothing she could do to stop it. Marble's skin had darkened to an unnatural greenish-brown and her body had contorted and twisted to angles that made Anna wince. She felt her stomach recoil in disgust and fought with the urge to look away.

Exbelua. That was the name that Cruxis had decided to call the atrocity of human life that Marble now was. The Desians moved quickly and surrounded Marble using tools to keep Marble sedated. Anna's mind moved slowly and she could not think. No, that was wrong, she could think but she did not know what to do.

Run. She wanted to run and the instinct to do just that was strong. There was nothing she could do for Marble now, to remain was to ask for a death wish. A horrified shock ran through her system and she wondered how she could have allowed those thoughts to invade her mind. It was _not_ hopeless. If Anna could revert back to her human form, then so would Marble. Anna would see to it, but she still did not know how she had reverted to her human form in the first place. Through all of her investigating of the Exbelua research that Cruxis conducted there was no information on how the effects of such a transformation could be reversed. Anna's transformation back to her original form was considered a paradox by all of those Cruxis scientists and Anna was grateful that they did not study her. From every piece of research Anna analyzed it had--

"Just what are you looking at, wench?" the sound of a man's condescending voice brought her out of her thoughts. Her eyes shifted from the Exbelua to the Desian that moved towards her while brandishing his whip.

"What do you think I'm looking at? You think it's everyday that I see Desians like you come in?" Anna's voice was laced in an unmasked loathing. She took a deep breath and shifted from foot to foot as she collected her thoughts and she calmed herself. Anger would serve only as a hindrance. "Now then, I'd like to have a word with the leader of this Desian attack. It is in clear violation of the non-aggression treaty with Iselia."

"Is that an order?" the man let out a laugh before he continued. "You are in no position to be giving _me_ orders."

"I am in every position to be giving you orders. Don't you know who I--" Anna stumbled upon her words as she came across a realization. "No, of course you don't know who I am."

"You're babbling to yourself, woman. I know who you are, you are one of the many pathetic worms that lives in this town."

"I'm no such thing and neither is anyone else that lives here," Anna's voice was laced in subtle irritation not at the insult but because she was no closer to her goal of stopping the attack. She knew all too well that talking with a Desian would be like talking to a fence post unless they knew that her word was worth something. "I am Anna Aurion, the wife of Kratos Aurion who is one of the Four Seraphim of Cruxis. Now--"

Laughter, not words, met her response and Anna's eyes narrowed. He took a moment to compose herself, but Anna saw a detestable smirk remain on his face.

"Oh, yes, of course, my apologies _Lady_ Anna. If you're Lady Anna then I am Lord Yuan," he said, then could not hold herself and burst out laughing again. Other Desians joined him in his laughter, and Anna then realized how close she was to the group of the Desians and to Marble.

Anna knew then what she would have to do. There would be no arguing with a Desian that did not know that he should follow her orders. He would need proof, as would all of them if she wanted them to take her seriously. An idea came to her mind quickly enough and she let all semblance of her human pride slip away. She hastily glanced about the village square, and saw that it was empty of any villager. That was a good sign, it meant the attack had not begun yet and also meant that there would be no witnesses to what she was about to do.

Anna's angelic form was simple to transfer to and her wings even simpler to unleash. She hated the form, but for now she had no choice. The Desian that had taunted her was now staring at her with wide eyes, not daring to speak a word. The Desians behind him stared in likewise disbelief and she noticed a man with a metallic arm dressed differently from the others approach her.

"I am Forcystus one of the Five Grand Cardinals and the leader of the Iselia ranch. I apologize for the actions of my soldier, he didn't know that you actually are Lady Anna," said the man with the metallic arm that Anna could not help but eye. At her will the wings disappeared and she shifted out of the angelic form that she so despised.

"Knowing as little as he did, I would say that he did his duty admirably. I can't have women claiming to be me," Anna chose her words very carefully, and made certain that no trace of malice laced her voice.

"Yes, of course," Forcystus said before he turned away from Anna and towards the Desian that she had encountered previously. "You, help keep that thing sedated until it's time."

"Yes, sir," the man said as he nodded and cast Anna a lingering glance before he headed towards Marble. _That thing._ Anna frowned at the wording. _That thing was a woman_. Forcystus's attention shifted back to Anna and she met his brown eyes with her own. "What brings you to Sylvarant? I assumed that you were staying with Lord Kratos on Derris-Kharlan."

"I was given a mission from Cruxis in these lands but it's a matter of the utmost secrecy. I can't talk about it," Anna said. She inwardly wondered exactly how much that these Grand Cardinals were informed of the inner workings and happenings of Cruxis if he did not know that she and Kratos were to protect the Chosen.

"Is Lord Kratos aiding you in this mission?"

"Yes he is. He's also in Sylvarant at the moment, however we're separated for the time being because of the nature of our mission. There is a more pressing matter that drew me here. This unlawful attack is something that I cannot overlook, it's a blatant disregard of your non-aggression treaty with Iselia."

"It's not disregard of that treaty, we're well within our rights in carrying out this attack. A boy was found in contact with host body F192 and attacking my guards as he escaped," Anna felt her heart quicken. _Lloyd…._ "I thank you for your concern but you should see that they were the ones that violated the treaty first, we are merely upholding the law. We need to punish the boy that dared to cross us."

"So you're destroying Iselia and turned a--one of your prisoners into an Exbelua just because one person made contact with a host body. That's an overreaction, he's just a boy."

"It's not an overreaction. We can't have these people thinking that they can just keep in contact with our host bodies even if it's one as young as a boy," he turned his gaze towards the group of Desians behind him and nodded his head. The group took it as an order and most of them began to move away from the village square and towards the rest of the village.

"Hey, wait a--"

"Even if it is an order from you, this attack is something that your order cannot stop," Forcystus' voice was laced in sympathy and Anna felt confusion run through her system. He knew that her rank held no power among the ranks of Cruxis and yet he did not seem to hold her in contempt as those on Derris-Kharlan had. Perhaps he had judged him too quickly. "I know that you must want to help these people because of your background but you should forget about them. Humans are no longer your concern, especially this village. They were the ones that brought this upon themselves."

There was only one choice left for her. If Forcystus refused to listen to her, then diplomacy was no longer an option. She brought her hand to the hilt of her sword.

"Well then, if that's your response then there's only--"

A wave of white mana hit Forcystus' unguarded body and he winced.

"Get away from that Desian," came the familiar voice of the one person that Anna had no desire to hear at that moment.

"Lord Forcystus!" came a slew of Desian voices but Anna had no time to see anything else as a hand grasped her shoulder and pulled her back and away from Forcystus. Shock coursed through her system and she turned around coming face to face with her son.

"Lloyd, what the hell are you doing here?" Anna's voice was laced in anger and she shook off his hand that was still on her shoulder. . Thoughts flew through her mind as to every possibility that this unexpected situation would bring. "I thought I told you to go to Dirk's."

"Yeah you did but I couldn't leave you here alone with the Desians."

"You lied to me," Anna's voice was dangerously low. If Forcystus knew that Lloyd was alive for certain then Yggdrasill would know that Lloyd was alive. She would never allow her son to be imprisoned on Derris-Kharlan as she had been. "You promised me that you were going to stay where it was safe. I told you that I was going to handle this alone."

"Well what did you expect me to do? You could die here, mom."

"And so can you!" Anna shouted and Lloyd stared at her with bewildered eyes. "I don't want my only son to die. Don't you understand? You're only seventeen, you're not invincible," through all her anger she finally noticed Genis standing beside Lloyd out of the corner of her eye. "And you even brought Genis here with you. How could you? He's even younger then you."

"Lloyd didn't bring me here, I came on my own"

"If Lloyd told you to go to Dirk's, then you wouldn't be here. You boys should never have come," Anna took a deep breath. Now was not the time to lecture the two on the finer points of danger. "It's not too late, you know. Both of you get out of here _now_."

"No way, I'm not leaving you with these Desians," Lloyd said and Anna met his eyes with her own. They showed the same defiance and determination that ran through her. "It's just as dangerous for me to be here as it is for you and don't pretend like you're different or something. It'll be easier with more people. We can get rid of them together."

"Lloyd, this isn't a game--"

"You…you're Lloyd Irving," Forcystus' hesitant voice interrupted Anna's train of thought as she turned around in bewilderment. "And Anna is your mother."

"Yeah, that's right. But who are you to ask me my name? And how do you know my mom?"

"Now this is interesting…" Forcystus said to himself ignoring Lloyd's questions and instead turned his gaze towards Anna. "I suppose you lied to protect your son."

"That was the idea," she turned her gaze to Lloyd and Genis and lowered her voice. "Boys, this is your last chance. Leave."

"No," Lloyd answered firmly and Anna knew that there would be no arguing with him. Kratos was right, he did inherit her stubborn nature.

"I cannot grant lenience for the act that you, Lloyd Irving, have committed. Despite your heritage you are not outside the law. You have been found guilty of violating the non-aggression treaty," Forcystus said. Anna sighed and inwardly readied herself for what was to come next. "Therefore I bring judgment upon you and this village."

"You violated the treaty, too! You tried to murder the Chosen!"

Forcystus took this comment in confusion and he glanced with one of his Desian subordinates.

"Us, kill the Chosen?" A Desian said and then laughed as if it was a humorous anecdote. Anna felt irritation course through her. There was reason to laugh at something that the boys had no way of knowing. "I see now. _They _must be after the Chosen."

"They?" Lloyd's voice was laced in confusion. "Are you saying that you aren't the ones that attacked Colette?"

"I have no need to explain myself to the likes of you," Forcystus said as he paused and then continued. "We've prepared an appropriate opponent for your crime."

"No…no, you can't mean," Anna stopped herself as she saw the other Desians prod Marble to in front of where they were. "Not Marble."

"Marble?" Genis said. "I don't see Marble anywhere."

Anna sighed and turned to him. "Marble is the monster in front of us."

"Wh--what? No way, that's not Marble," Genis said softly. "It can't be."

"Stop this at once," Anna said in a commanding voice as she turned and stared at Forcystus in the eyes. "There is no reason to continue to do this."

"There is every reason for this to continue. That boy defied our laws, he needs punishment. If we stop then that would defeat our entire purpose of ever coming to this village."

"I doubt your leader would be very happy if he knew that I was dead because of your incompetence."

"He doesn't have to know. If you're going to defend your son, whatever happens afterwards is your fault, not mine."

Anna's eyes widened at the implications of his words and she did not respond as her eyes fell on Marble's form once again. She shook her head and drew her sword. There was no time to worry about how the mind of a Desian worked.

"Now, receive your punishment."

Those that were guarding Marble now stepped away, leaving her to come towards them. She was agitated, that Anna knew, and her limbs were moving sporadically.

"Wh--what do you mean that monster's Marble, Anna?" Genis asked shockingly softly, which tore Anna's attention from Forcystus to meet the boy's frightened gaze. Her features softened in sympathy. "It can't be Marble, Marble's human."

"Yes, she is human, or at least she was. The Desians turned her into that monster by removing her exsphere. Without a key crest it made her mana go out of control and turned her into a--into what she is now. She won't be able to control herself from here on out."

"M--mom? You mean that you got turned into one of those things?"

"Yes, I did. And don't call her a thing," Anna said, knowing full well that the poor woman could hear and experience everything around her. "That's Marble."

"Marble!" Genis called out while staring wide-eyed at Marble. "Marble, stop this!"

"She can't hear you, Genis. Well, she can but she can't control herself," Anna said as Marble began to move towards a crowd of people. _No. _She raced forwards and slashed the hand before it could plummet on the townspeople. _When did the villagers come--? No, that did not matter now. There's no time._

"Hey, c'mon! Leave them alone, you want to attack me," Anna said while feeling adrenaline running through her system. Her mind worked slowly and she then hated how her words must have sounded to the woman trapped inside. She hated how her sword must have hurt her. "Marble, I'm so sorry I have to do this. Please, try to get in control of yourself. I…I don't want to hurt you."

Marble moved towards Anna and she did not pause at her words as if they could magically transform her back into a human. The cruelty of the world was crashing down on Anna. No matter what she did she could not stop Forcystus' attack on Iselia, or stop Marble from being transformed into a monster. Even now she could not guarantee the safety of her own son. Her grip on the sword tightened. That was not true. She was there and no matter whatever else that she failed to do, she would protect him. Marble's twisted arm crashed down from above and Anna jumped instinctively and landed on her side, feeling the reverberation of it crash down on the ground that she was once standing on.

Lloyd was there in front of her, attacking Marble to keep her distracted. Anna got to her feet as quickly as she could. She could not afford to be lost in her thoughts of the darkness of the situation, there was no time. She had to fight. For Lloyd. For Genis. And…for Marble.

Anna's grip on her sword tightened before she swung in in Marble's side, and quickly drew it away and retreated so Marble could not rebound. Lloyd followed suit and Anna soon met his bewildered eyes.

"M--mom? Can we really…kill her?"

"She can't control herself, Lloyd. I…I don't want her to die either," Anna saw Marble approach them in her peripheral vision and she ran towards her and thrust her sword in Marble's side. "There's no other option."

"No, there's got to be another way. You made it out of it alive, didn't you?" Another arm swung towards Anna and she moved out of the way just in time, feeling the arm graze her own and a pain that came soon after.

"I was lucky. I don't know if she can make it out alive," Anna said. Marble rose her arm above Lloyd and he quickly rose his swords and attacked before retreating towards Anna.

"Then how did you make it out alive?"

"I--I don't know. It must have been something the Desians did."

Marble was closer to them then Anna had paid attention to and she brought her arm to attack her. Anna dodged it as it crashed to the ground and Lloyd attacked as Marble was distracted. Anna saw from the corner of her eye Genis that was staring at the fight that was unravelling before him. She cursed inwardly and ran towards the boy.

"Can you fight?" Anna asked, and Genis' gaze drew to her own.

"Y--yeah, I can use magic."

"Then help--"

"But I can't! That's Marble. I don't want to attack her, she doesn't deserve to get hurt," as Anna continued to stare into his wide and fearful gaze and he said, much softer. "I…I don't want her to die."

"If you don't fight then we're all going to die instead. Do you really want that?" Anna did not wait for a response and turned quickly and ran towards the fray. Lloyd could not fight alone for long, and they needed Genis' help. Although they could evade Marble's attacks, she felt the exhaustion through her system and she had no idea how this exertion would be effecting Lloyd. She knew it was hard for Genis but he needed to do what needed to be done.

"Lloyd, talk to him," Anna said quickly as she followed him in his feint.

"What?"

"Genis. He'll listen to you. Don't worry about me, I can hold my own. Tell him if it were me I'd rather die then kill anyone," Anna said before she ran from Lloyd and to Marble, taking full advantage of her slow speed. She struck Marble's contorted back and Marble's movements stilled in pain. Anna's eyes widened as she saw through her adrenaline rush and to the horror of the situation.

_Why do things like this have to happen? _Anna thought as she bit her lip and brought her free hand to wipe her sweat drenched brow._ Marble doesn't deserve this. Genis and Lloyd don't deserve this… So why does it still have to happen?_ This was not the first time she had wondered such things and the only answer that came to her was that the world was a cruel place that did not care about kindness or fairness or love. What Anna hated most was that Lloyd had to learn this when he was only seventeen.

Out of the corner of her eye she saw a bright ball of flame fly through the air and land on Marble's torso. She writhed in the pain and the scent of seared flesh met Anna's nostrils. It did not incapacitate her for long, because Marble then began to move towards the boys and she slowly lifted her contorted arm. Anna's heart started pounding against her chest and her adrenaline took over again as she ran towards Marble and plunged her sword into Marble's torso and quickly retreated. Lloyd ran towards Marble and began to use the attack that he called a Sonic Thrust. Anna's mind quickly refocused as she ran towards Marble and quickly mimicked the attack, feeling the familiar energy of the exesphere surge through her body.

Another fireball flew past her and landed on Marble again. She writhed in pain but both of her contorted arms were heading towards Lloyd. Anna's eyes widened and she had no time to think of a plan as she ran towards him as fast as she was threw her arms about him and used the momentum she had from running to roll on the ground and away from Marble as fast as she could. _Crash._ Her ears were rang and she felt the vibration from Marble's arm hitting the ground. She opened her eyes and felt Lloyd beneath her. She rolled herself off of him and slowly rose from the ground.

"You okay?" Anna asked between her panting breaths and offered him her hand. Lloyd looked at her with stunned eyes before she took it and rose as well.

"Y--yeah," Lloyd said after awhile and Anna squeezed his hand and gave him a small smile. "Um, thanks mom."

"You're welcome," Anna said but had no time for any further pleasantries. She placed her hand to where her hilt should be out of habit but there was nothing there. Her sword. Where was her sword? She must have dropped it in the rush for Lloyd. She scanned the ground for any sign of a sword and she quickly found it in a glimmer of metal and found it beside Marble, whose movements had stilled for reasons that Anna had no time to think about.

"Here," Lloyd said and Anna turned to him. He offered one of his swords, hilt first, and she took it.

"Thanks."

Anna turned to Marble and just as Marble finally began to move a green mana-dense wind hit her side. Anna took this opportunity and dashed towards her and brought her sword to attack the same spot the wind had hit. Marble's arm rose but it was much slower then it was before that Anna retreated with ease to safety. Yet more fire flew past her and hit it's mark on Marble, just as Lloyd ran up to Marble and plunged his sword into Marble's torso before he retreated.

Marble was moving again but this time it was slow, very slow, and then she collapsed. Anna's eyes widened as the reality of the situation sunk in again. There was no secret healing technique that was going to bring her back as it had Anna. She clenched her teeth and tightened her grip on her sword. There was nothing that she could do and she hated it.

"Lord Forcystus," came a Desian's voice, breaking through her thoughts and pulling her back to reality. "It's just as you thought, that boy has an exesphere."

"It must be the one from the Angelus Project that we've been looking for," Forcystus said to the Desian whom talked before he turned to Lloyd. "Give it to me."

"No way. You Desians ruined my parents lives because of this thing," Lloyd's voice was laced in anger and Anna felt shock course through her at his words. "I'm never going to give it to you."

"Just--" Brown, contorted arms wrapped themselves about Forcystus and cut off his words until only a grunt could escape his lips.

"Run away…Genis, Lloyd…and you, too, angel…" came Marble's weak voice. _She saw the transformation._ Anna realized as her eyes widened and another, more important realization struck her. _She's struggling to keep control…even after all she's been through, she can move._

"Marble, I'm sorry…I'm so sorry!" Genis' voice was laced in sorrow and Anna felt sympathy course through her system. _He's even younger then Lloyd._ "I didn't know what to do and you were attacking Lloyd and Anna and--"

"It's alright…Genis…I--I understand. Now, get away…hurry! Genis…you were like a grandson to me. I don't want you to die…not before your time. Thank you for everything. Goodbye."

Everything happened so quickly and unexpectedly that Anna barely had time for all of it to register it in her mind. A bright light blinded her and she brought her hands to her face instinctively and loud sound resonated throughout the village square sent her ears ringing.

"No! Protect Lord Forcystus!" cried a Desian and soon after others surrounded Forcystus, who was on the ground limping. Marble…where was Marble? The events slowly took relevance in her mind and Anna slowly made sense of it all. Had Marble…self-destructed? Could an Exbelua even have that type of capability?

"Lloyd. We will always come after you as long as you possess that Exsphere. Always," Anna looked at Forcystus and the horror that she was once filled with quickly hardened into anger.

"I doubt that you'll be able to live up to your words," Anna said.

"Oh really? Well--" A sound of pain escaped his lips and Forcystus' hand came to his midsection. "R--retreat for now."

"Yes, sir," came the voices of many Desian soldiers as they began to move to follow their superior's orders.

"M--Marble? Marble…No," Genis' voice was soft, so soft. Anna tore her eyes from the retreating Desians to the young boy that held an exsphere in his hand, staring at it with eyes shaped in horror. He was too young for this and her heart was filled with sympathy. Before she gave it a second thought she put her arms about him and held his body against her.

"Shhh," she said, and ran her hand through his hair.

"It's not fair…" Genis said and his shoulders began to shake. Anna's heart was torn in sympathy and she wrapped her arms about him, feeling his warm body against hers. She felt his arms wrap around her. "Why'd she have to die?"

"I…I…" Anna said, trying to feign some sort of composure. She had to comfort him and her mind scrambled for some platitude but all of those words alluded her. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Genis."

"What have you done? Look," a loud voice drew her from her thoughts with a jolt and her head snapped towards the bearer of the voice. She felt Genis' body tense. "Look what happened to our village. It's all your fault!"

"I'm sorry…" Lloyd's voice was laced in regret and Anna felt a protective edge come over her. How _dare_ they blame her son. She moved away from her embrace with Genis, and towards the mayor.

"Try controlling your temper for once, stop acting like a child. Yelling at him isn't the right way to go about this."

"Oh, and what would you propose that I do?"

"Clean up the village to clear your head," Anna said, ignoring the condescending nature of the man's voice. "After that you should be able to deal with Lloyd."

"And why can`t I now?"

"You're too emotional," Anna said. Long ago she learnt to cast such emotions aside in situations such as this, and she could not understand how a man of his age could not. "You should--"

"Don't tell me how to run my village, you're an outsider," the man said, and Anna narrowed her eyes. He _was_ acting like a child. She looked about, seeing many villagers merely standing by and watching their exchange. She frowned, they were not intervening.

"And what's that got to do with anything? Just because I'm from elsewhere doesn't make my opinion on how you're treating my son any less valid."

"But he is the one that is responsible for all of this."

"He's just a child," Anna said and her eyes narrowed. "There is _no _reason to treat him the same way as you would someone of your own age, especially since he's shaken from what just happened. Think about what your doing a little more."

"There is nothing more to think about. It's his fault! He deserves punishment for his actions."

"What's the point of blaming him for something that the Desians did?" Anna's voice was laced in protective anger. "Lloyd didn't lead the attack on Iselia, he came here to help defend it. If anything, he was brave. You should be thanking him."

"I'll do no such thing. Didn't you hear what that Desian said? It was Lloyd's involvement with the ranch that brought them here. If he didn't go to the ranch, then none of this would have happened. The Desians marked Lloyd as their enemy."

"Wait a minute," Genis' voice was raised in subtle anger after he finally collected himself, in defence of his friend. "You're going to exile him?"

"Yes." Anna felt shock course through her system. She was not expecting such harsh punishment.

"That's not fair! He didn't do anything wrong! Lloyd just saved Marble--"

"Any involvement with the ranch is forbidden. There are no exceptions."

"So you're not willing to help the people that are right in front of you, is that it?" Anna's voice was laced in anger and she crossed her arms. "I guess this is a village of cowards."

"Call us what you like, there's nothing we can do about that ranch. All we can do is protect this village. Had your son not done something so stupid, the ones at the ranch would have been the only ones that died."

"I'm sure you wouldn't feel that way if you were one of the people being held at the ranch. We should help our own, not make excuses about our own inaction."

"Mom, that's enough. Arguing isn't going to do anything, it can't change the fact that this was my fault. He's right, if I didn't go to the ranch, this attack wouldn't have happened. I'll leave."

"No, Lloyd. You shouldn't have to leave your home over this, it's not your fault," Anna said, but she knew that Lloyd had listened to her previous words and ignored them just as he would ignore these ones. He was young and the attack was still fresh in his mind. _He must feel so guilty about this…_

"Yeah, Anna's right," came Genis' youthful voice. "It's not Lloyd's fault at all. I'm the one that took him to the ranch, so it's my fault."

"But it's Lloyd the Desians are after, not you," the mayor said. "And besides, Lloyd isn't from this village to begin with. He's an outsider, raised by a dwarf. That's reason enough to let him go."

"Then I'm leaving, too. I'm just as guilty as he is."

"Genis…"

"Genis…" Anna echoed her son's awe at the loyalty that he was showing his friend. "You don't have to do that. If you're worried about Lloyd, don't, I'll be with him."

"No, that's not why. I want to go with Lloyd and I wouldn't mind going with you, either," Genis said with a small smile and she could not help but smile back. "You are his mom, after all and you seem pretty okay. Well, for a human, anyway."

"Genis…" Anna said, not being able to sort out her feelings of that comment. "Thank you."

"You know, I've been wondering something," The mayor said while looking at Anna. "You were here before any of us and you were talking to that Desian leader. Why? They should have been attacking you like the rest of us. Are you on speaking terms with them? Or maybe you're work--"

Anger surged through Anna's mind and she quickly walked towards the man and struck him across the face with an open palm.

"Don't you _ever_ say that to me again. Don't you _dare_ imply that. I hate the Desians just as much as you. I was trying to save this village by any means necessary. If that meant talking to that Desian leader to compromise with him, I'm willing."

"Wait a second, mom," Lloyd's voice brought her out of her anger and she turned her hhead to gaze at him. "Were you--were you trying to talk them into stopping the attack on the village by letting them capture you again and make another one of those exspheres?"

"Lloyd…" Anna stared into his brown eyes that were so full of the despair. She could not tell him the truth, but there was no way to convince him otherwise if she did not. "You have to understand, this wasn't--"

"No, there's nothing to understand. I--I can't believe you'd do that. I just got to know you again and you were going to leave so soon without even telling me," Lloyd clenched his fists. "All because of something stupid that I did."

"Lloyd, that wasn't your fault."

"But it was! If it wasn't for me going to the ranch then--"

"This is no time for you to think of hypothetical situations. It happened, but it was the Desians decision to attack Iselia, not yours."

"I don't care. I can't just blame the Desians for every single thing. I was the one that provoked them to attack. I'll leave."

"Stubborn," Anna murmured, feeling an irritation course through her. There would be no arguing with him like this. "Then I guess that means that I'm coming with you."

"Guess so."

The crowd of villagers dispersed after the commotion died down, to salvage what was left of the village, she gathered. She also supposed they would bury the dead as well. _The dead. _The image of the two men that she saw at the town gates suddenly flashed through her mind as well as the image of Marble. _I'll have to remember to pray for them later._ She hoped that the villagers would not forget the men and their vain efforts to protect the village. Anna moved away from the boys as they were talking to Colette's family. She needed to gather her thoughts.

Anna slowly walked across the ground feeling the weight of Lloyd's sword in her sheath brush against her leg. Where were they to go now? She would love to live in Luin again, but that was so far away. Too far away and too dangerous for two young boys and herself to journey to on their own. She pressed her lips together in concentration. There was another option, but Anna did not like it. They would have to join the Chosen's group, it would be far safer to be with them then alone. Afterwards, they could journey to Luin and stay there. The group may not have even reached Triet yet, there was plenty of time to catch up to them. Anna sighed. It was the right decision but even so, a strong part of her did not want to rejoin them for one reason. No, not a reason but a person.

Kratos.

That man left her torn. She did not know what to think about meeting him again. A part of her wanted to see him again and another part did not. She should feel happy to see him again, but her heart refused to comply with her mind and an apprehension emerged in the pit of her stomach. _Well, at least he'll get to see Lloyd again. They'll get to know each other better._ Anna gritted her teeth, and more unpleasant thoughts emerged in her mind. Yggdrasill would soon know about Lloyd's existence. Even though she knew that it could be explained away with another one of Kratos' lies, the idea of Yggdrasill knowing about Lloyd made her uneasy.

Anna moved another step only to feel metal, not dirt, beneath her boot. She looked down to see her own sword and she leaned down to grasp it. Anna shook her head as she unsheathed Lloyd's sword and sheathed her own. She held Lloyd's sword horizontally and stared into it, seeing a distortion of her own reflection. This was no time to worry about Kratos or anything else that had happened before in Iselia. She had to be strong for both Lloyd and for Genis. They would need someone to be strong for them, and she would be that person. She could think about all everything later, she would figure things out later.

"Hey, mom," Anna was startled as Lloyd's voice came from behind her. "You ready to go?"

"Yes, I think that I am," Anna said as she turned around to face him with a small smile. "As ready as I'll ever be. Oh, here," Anna said and she offered him his sword. "Thanks for letting me borrow it."

"Hey, no problem. Anytime, mom."

"Your father would never let me borrow his sword," Anna said with a smile, attempting to lighten the mood. They began walking towards Genis who was beside Colette's family by the town gates. "He's very protective about his swords. He doesn't want anyone but him to use them."

"Seriously? Even if you needed to borrow it so you could attack?"

"He only has one sword, Lloyd, you have two."

"Oh, yeah."

Anna's smile grew as their pace stilled because they reached the gates. Noishe was at the entrance, and when he saw them both he gave out a whine and his tail began to wag.

"Hello, Noishe," Anna said as she began to walk again towards him, and brought a hand to stroke his fur. Her eyes widened and her hand stilled as she caught sight of the two towns guardsmen that were still lying dead on the ground.

"You're going to give these two a proper burial, right?" Anna said, turning her head towards Colette's family. "They fought bravely to protect their home."

"That they did. Of course we'll bury them, these men have families here. Martel only knows if they're still alive. If not, I'll see to it," came the voice of an elderly woman. Her name was Phaidra, if she recalled correctly.

"Thank you. If you don't mind me asking, what were their names? I need to know so I can pray for them."

"The older man was named Leonard, he was training the younger man, Carter."

_Carter and Leonard…_ Anna thought as she turned again to look at their faces. "Thank you, I'll remember that. May they rest in peace."

"And may the Goddess Martel watch over them," Phaidra added and Anna winced. She did not have the heart to mention that her prayers were not to a fake goddess.

"Yes, I'm sure that She will," Anna murmured, unable to meet any of them in the eye. "We should get going now Lloyd, Genis. We do have a lot of ground to cover before nightfall."

"We do? Are we going to catch up to Colette and dad?"

"Yes, we are. We have no choice in the matter, it's dangerous to travel so there will be safety in numbers," Lloyd's demeanour brightened. "But we're not going to stay with them for the whole journey. I think that after we reach Luin, we should part ways. The chosen's journey is a dangerous one. I'd rather you be on it for as little as possible."

"Luin? Why Luin?"

"That's where I was born. I'd like to go back there again."

"It is? Can't wait to see it then."

"I guess I'll have to stay with Colette and Raine when we reach Luin then..."

"You don't have to, you can stay with us. I don't mind at all and I'm sure that Raine would rather you stay where it's safe. Besides, you want to stick with Lloyd, right?"

"Yeah, I really want to stay with Lloyd. Thank you so much."

"Why, you're welcome," Anna said, feeling a smile emerge at Genis' exuberance.

"It'll be nice living with you both," Lloyd said as he walked with Genis and Anna past the gates, carefully avoiding the two dead men. "C'mon, Noishe, let's go."

"Don't throw your lives away, now," Phaidra called after them, and Anna turned around to see both Colette's family standing there, seeing them off.

"Don't worry, I'll make sure nothing happens to these boys."

"May the Goddess Martel protect you all," came the masculine voice of Colette's father whose name alluded her. She nodded and waved at them before turning her gaze towards the path in front of them.

"Say mom, I know you might still be mad at me for coming after you, but I don't regret it. I'm glad that the Desians didn't take you, I can't stand what they would've done to you. I--I love you, you know," he admitted with his eyes downcast and Anna felt her eyes widen. "I kind of like having you around."

"Love you too, sweetie. It's nice to have you around too. And I think…" Anna said. "I think that I can forgive you."

"Really?" Lloyd said. "Well then I guess I can forgive you too. I'll just have to keep a closer eye on you from now on. I gotta protect you."

"You sound like your father."

"Well he did tell me to take care of you."

"Did he now?" Anna asked while raising an eyebrow, feeling curiosity course through her. "What else did he tell you to do?"

"Oh, he told me to make you happy," Lloyd said before shock registered his features. "I--I don't think I was supposed to tell you that--"

"Don't worry, Lloyd, I think she can keep a secret, unlike you."

Anna laughed and Lloyd looked as if he were about to respond before she stopped him.

"Now, we should go see Dirk before anything. He needs to know everything that happened so he won't be worrying about us if we don't return. And maybe we can pick up some provisions from him too."

"Oh, that's right. Dad needs to know what happened…" Lloyd's face fell.

"I'll talk to him, don't worry. I know that it wasn't your fault and from what I know of him he won't be too hard on you."

"I don't care if he blames me I just…it feels like I let him down."

"I'll handle it, sweetie," Anna said, feeling sympathy flood her system. "I may not be Dirk, but I'm your mother and I am proud of you."

"Thanks, mom," Lloyd said and Anna smiled. She walked along the path, this time with no sense of urgency and she tried her best to push any emotions and the recent memories aside. She would have time to dwell on them later, but as for now she needed to be strong.


	10. Desert Beginnings

_AN: Next chapter~!_

_Disclaimer: I own nothing._

"We're finally here," Genis exclaimed, throwing his hands up in the air.

"Yeah, no kidding," Lloyd said as he breathed in the hot and humid desert air. This place looked so much different from Iselia and he looked past the entranceway to the strange and new surroundings of Triet. It felt good to be somewhere new.

"It took us less time then I expected. You two are good travelers," mom said as she stopped walking in the entranceway to the city and Lloyd stopped as well in an automatic response as his gaze turned to her. "I think it's going to be a pleasure journeying with the both of you."

"Thanks, mom."

"Oh, you're welcome Llo--" mom's eyes widened as she looked towards the town. "Boys, get behind me and be quiet."

Before Lloyd could respond he felt himself being pushed backwards by mom's arm. Noishe walked in front of the three of them and moved sideways, obscuring Lloyd's vision of Triet._ Huh? What's going on? _Lloyd thought as he felt a wave of confusion course through his system.

"Good boy," mom murmured softly to Noishe as she stroked his fur softly before both arms were in front of Genis and Lloyd. He glanced at Genis but his gaze was filled with as much confusion as Lloyd felt.

"This is an order from Lord Forcystus," came a masculine voice that was so loud that it carried to his ears. _Wait… Forcystus? _Lloyd thought, clenching his fists into his sweaty palms. _Do these guys work for him?_ "A human named Lloyd is on the run with an Exsphere."

Lloyd felt his feet freeze in position. He could not see the bearer of the voice from his vantage point but he knew exactly who it was. It was a Desian, and that was all the information that he needed to feel a strange mixture of anger, fear and hatred in the pit of his stomach.

"His identification code is unknown. Form a cordon in all areas immediately."

"What does this Lloyd look like?" came another masculine voice that was softer then the one before.

"His likeness and description are on the wanted posters. We're counting on you."

"Yes, sir."

"Don't move," mom whispered harshly, never moving her arms or her stance that looked as if she'd be ready to move at any given moment. Lloyd did as she said, with the mixture of emotions never leaving his system. After what had seemed like an eternity her arms fell from their position in front of him and Genis and her stance relaxed, as she turned towards them.

"Looks like we'll have to be careful in this city. We can't have those Desians getting to you now can we, sweetie?" mom said as she brought a hand to ruffle his hair and he felt the mixture of emotions evaporate and a calming relief take it's place.

"Does this mean we have to leave here now?" Genis asked and mom shook her head.

"I only counted four Desians. We should be fine for now. I doubt we'll even run into them, and I know that we're going to need to rest and buy some supplies before another trip through the desert."

"But they could recognize Lloyd from the poster."

"That's a fair point. How about we look at the wanted poster before we make up our minds?" mom said as she moved past Noishe and Lloyd and Genis followed her. Lloyd noticed Noishe move in the corner of his eye towards a stable around the front of the town.

"Is this the wanted poster?" Genis asked while eyeing the poster.

"Well, it does say Lloyd's name below the picture."

"It's good," Genis said, still studying the wanted poster. "They'll never find you with this…I think."

"Am I really this ugly?" Lloyd asked, feeling shock flood through him. He was never one to care about his looks or even look at a mirror much at all but…was he really hideous?

"Of course not, you're a very handsome young man," mom said and Lloyd smiled. "This just goes to show that the Desians have no artistic talent."

"Heh," Lloyd ran a hand through his hair, feeling embarrassment course through his system. "Uh, thanks mom."

"Anyway," Genis said loudly, and when Lloyd turned to him he thought he caught Genis' blue eyes roll. "What should we do now that we're here?"

"Well, we're going to need some more supplies before we head off to where Kratos and the others are."

"But mom, what about where dad and Colette are? We have no clue."

"I kn--" Anna stopped herself in mid-sentence. "I'm sure that someone in Triet knows where Colette and Kratos are. I'll just ask about the Chosen's group around town but don't worry about it. I'd be willing to take care of all of that, if you two boys want to go and explore this town on your own."

"And let you do all the work?" Lloyd shook his head. "No way, I want to come too."

"Lloyd, you're volunteering to do work? Do you have heatstroke or something?"

"No, I don't have heatstroke, Genis," Lloyd's voice was laced with annoyance before he turned back towards mom with a smile. "I just want to help my favourite mom."

"Your only mom," Anna said with a wry smile.

"Yeah, I know that but I have two dads so picking favourite parents makes sense."

"So you've picked a favourite dad?" She asked with an eyebrow raised.

"No I haven't! I like both my dads the same! You gotta--" her laughter stopped his sentence. "Oh, I get it. Ha ha, very funny."

"Well it wasn't meant to work you up so much. It just…kind of did," she broke out into laughter again and Lloyd smiled. "We should get going. I know where the marketplace is, follow me."

Mom did not hesitate as she immediately began to walk away from the building that the poster was on and towards a large group of people and Lloyd and Genis followed her.

"You're such a mama's boy," Genis muttered.

"Shut up," Lloyd said, feeling annoyance course through his system. " I am not."

"Oh yeah? Then prove it. Come with me and explore Triet."

"No way, I wanna stay with mom."

"Ha, then I was right. It was your idea to go off with your mom. You're a--"

"Am not. We can always explore later, anyway."

"No, you won't be able to do that. Not today at least," mom said, turning her head to look at them.

"You heard."

"You two weren't very discrete," Anna said while slowing to a stop and turning to them. Lloyd stopped as well, and the throng of people moved around the trio. "Now, we're going to have to get the supplies we need, figure out where the Chosen's group is, rest and get out of here as quickly as possible. That way it'll be easiest to catch up to them."

"Oh…so I guess there really is no time, huh."

"Yep. If you want to explore Triet you should do it now," Lloyd opened his mouth to respond. "Now don't you worry about me, I'm fine with doing all of the work, honestly."

"No way, I already made up my mind," Lloyd said while shaking his head, feeling determination course through his system. "I want to go with you. Can't leave all the work to you, now can I?"

She chuckled and raised her hands into the air. "Okay, okay, I give up. If this is what you really want, then I'm more then happy to have the company. Just don't expect anything exciting to happen. Shopping isn't exactly my favourite thing in the world."

Mom turned around and they began walking again, weaving their way around the throng of people. They were in the marketplace now, Lloyd knew since there were stalls of various items all around them, and he could loud voices carrying over the chatter of the area.

"Mama's boy," came Genis' barely audible mutter and Lloyd looked at him and narrowed his eyes before he jabbed him with his elbow.

"Ow…"

"You two getting along back there?" Anna asked as she turned around to look at them.

"Yes," they both replied in monotone unison. Lloyd could of sworn he saw a smirk grace her lips before she turned around again and wove her way through the crowds and began looking at the merchandise of the stalls. Lloyd looked on in awe at the wide array of things that lay across the tables. There was so much stuff, it was amazing. He shook his head and began to refocus himself. He wasn't here to look, he had to help mom.

"What should we be looking for?"

"Hmm, well we'll need some more water flasks for one thing."

"More of them? But dad already gave us some."

"I know that but this is a desert, I want to make sure none of us get dehydrated. It may be a little excessive, but I'd rather nothing happened to any of us."

"Oh, okay," Lloyd said, and looked at the various animal skin flasks that were on the table. "What about those ones?"

"Good eye, Lloyd. Those ones won't be too expensive," mom said as she got a large number of them into her grasp.

"We'll also need one of these," Anna murmured as she was fingering a knife and then she held it by the hilt and examined it.

"For what?"

"It'll be good for opening cacti for water. We shouldn't dull our swords over something like that."

"There's water in cacti?"

Mom nodded. "That's why they have the waxy skin and the sharp thorns, to keep the water inside. You know, their flowers are very beautiful even if they're rare to see."

"They are?"

"As rare as rain in a desert," she smiled to herself, and her eyes looked as if they were somewhere else. "That is the only time that they bloom. I only ever saw them once."

"Is there anything that I can help you with, miss?" The woman that was running the stall said as she walked up to them.

"Yes, there is. How much would all of these be?" She asked while holding up the knife and the animal skin flasks in her hand.

"Good choices. That'll be no less then 1000 gald."

"1000 gald? That's outrageous. This thing is worth no more then 50," mom said while holding up the knife. "And these flasks can't run you more then 250."

"Maybe I was a bit too hasty in my prices. How about 600 gald?"

"You think just 'cause I'm not from here that you're going to swindle me out of my money?" Irritation laced mom's voice and Lloyd was surprised that any was there to begin with. The woman was just selling her wares, after all. "That's double what it's worth."

"Um, mom, maybe you should just pay what she--"

"Lloyd, be quiet," her voice was harsh and Lloyd felt shock course through her system.

"What--" before he could mutter another word he felt her hand on his arm leading him away from the merchant.

"I'll just be a moment, excuse me," she said to the merchant, leaving Genis to follow them.

"Have you ever haggled before?" mom said with none of the irritation that there once was as soon as they were a distance away from the stand.

"What's a haggle?"

"Lloyd, how stupid are you?" Lloyd felt anger course through him and his glare turned to Genis. "Haggling is like deciding about the price of something you want to buy."

"Hey, that's right," mom said with surprise lacing her voice. "Where'd you learn about something like that?"

"Oh, it was something that I read in a book. I also read that Triet is one of the only towns in Sylvarant to haggle."

"Now I'm impressed."

"Heh, well thanks," Genis said smiling at the compliment.

"If only Lloyd would borrow one of those books of yours, maybe he could learn a thing or two."

"Well I'm just not the reading type is all."

"Are you also not the listening type? You never pay attention in any of Raine's classes."

"So I've heard. It's a good thing that we'll be travelling with your teacher soon, I'll have to make sure that she continues giving you lessons."

"Studying on the Journey of Regeneration?" Lloyd felt his stomach drop. "I thought I wouldn't have to."

"Lloyd," mom began, taking on the authoritative tone of voice. "There is no reason not to study."

"I--I guess so," Lloyd mumbled. _Bastard…_ he thought as he sent a glare at Genis who looked as if he was thoroughly enjoying himself. "Can dad teach me instead?"

"That's something that you'll have to take up with him," mom said while she was smiling. "But I'm sure that he'll say yes."

"Alright," Lloyd said feeling triumph flood through him. "Stuff makes more sense when he explains stuff. Hey, Genis, I almost forgot to say. I know what a hypothetical situation is now."

"Wow, Lloyd, you said a word that's more then ten letters long. Now that is impressive."

"Hey," Lloyd said, hearing the sarcasm in Genis' voice. "Just what--"

"Boys, you can stay here arguing as long as you want but I need to get back to shopping. Can't stay in Triet all day."

"R--right. I'll come with you," Lloyd said and followed her back to the stall they were at before.

"Mama's boy," Genis muttered under his breath.

"Am not."

Mom moved to the front of the stall where the woman that had the knife and flasks that she wanted.

"Now where were we, again?"

* * *

"Why'd you get these things, mom?" Lloyd asked as he held up a white robe. He was sitting down on the dock that was by the water's edge while watching mom put water in the animal-skin flasks. She turned to him as she was filling the last flask.

"Those are to deflect the heat of the desert."

"How does it do that? Is it magic or something?"

"Don't you know anything?" Genis said, annoyed as he sat on the dock, dangling his legs across the edge that were not long enough to reach the water. "The colour white deflects the sun's heat, just like the colour black attracts the sun's heat."

"Seriously? I never knew that."

"Well now you do. These'll help to keep all of us cool," mom said as she capped the final flask and walked from the water's edge towards them. "The desert heat can feel overbearing at times."

"That's true, it was kind of rough getting here."

"I know, especially when you two aren't used to traveling. I want to make things as easy as possible," Mom said as she sat down beside him and Genis.

"Well, thanks mom."

"Oh, no problem, no problem," she said absently as she searched through the bag that carried their supplies.

"Whatcha looking for?"

"Oh, just making sure that I remembered to buy everything, that's all," she said before she fell silent and continued rummaging through the bag.

Lloyd stretched his legs out in front of him and leant back on the balls of his hands as he stared at the oasis that sparkled in the sun. It was kind of nice taking a break and he raised his hand to wipe his brow. He glanced at Genis and it looked like he was taking the time to relax as well.

"Are you boys both ready to go?" Mom asked finally as she got up to stand and looked from Genis to Lloyd.

"I'm ready."

"Yeah, me too," Genis said as he stood up and Lloyd followed suit.

"Well then, let's get going."

"Wait," Genis said. "Don't we need to know where we're going first?"

"Oh, right, I forgot about that," she paused in contemplation before continuing and her brow furrowed. "I know, I'll go and ask if anyone's seen the Chosen. You two can stay here and relax."

"But mom, that's not fair on you. We should all go together."

Mom smiled. "I'd be happy to have you come with me. Now where do you think we should start first?"

"Oh, well what about there?" Lloyd pointed to a brown tent that was close to them. "I've been wondering what's in there."

"There?" mom gave a sigh. "Well, if you really want to…"

"What's wrong with there?" Lloyd said, feeling curiosity course through his system.

"Oh, well that's a fortune teller's tent."

"That's perfect! A fortune teller will know where Colette and dad are."

"And Raine," Genis said.

"Yep, and Professor Sage too."

"I…don't know about that Lloyd. I've been to this fortune teller before, a long time ago."

"Oh yeah? What'd he say?"

"Well…she told me that I'd lived an easy life, and gave me dozens of career options and also that…how did she put it? I'd find new love in strange, exotic places."

"Well, that's not too bad," Lloyd said.

"I was together with your father at the time," mom said and her eyes caught the annoyance in her voice. "These fortune tellers…it's such a sham. All they do is talk in generalities."

"Maybe the fortune teller knows something about where they are, though," Lloyd said. "I bet Colette would've wanted to check a fortune teller out."

"Yeah, I bet she dragged Raine and Kratos there too."

"Well, okay, if you say so."

It took little time to walk towards the fortune teller's tent. Lloyd walked into the tent first and it took him some time for his eyes to adjust to what was very dark from the bright sunlight of the Triet desert.

"Why, hello there," came a female voice, and Lloyd first saw two bright green eyes before the shadow of her face became visible. "Welcome to the House of Fortune. What would you like me to divine for you?"

"We just want to know the location of the Chosen and her companions," mom said.

"Oh, I do know that. I'll just need 100 gald. This ability doesn't come for free."

"You've gotta be kidding me. Sorry, we'll just be going--"

"Mom, please?" Lloyd said, turning his gaze to hers. "She says she knows where they are."

Mom sighed as she reached in the money pouch and handed over the money.

"Mmm…" The fortune teller paused, rubbed her temples and looked as if she was in deep concentration. "I can see her! The Chosen is heading for the oasis that is said to have been destroyed when Efreet went out of control."

"…Is that true?" Genis asked.

"The Chosen's companion said so, so there's no doubt."

Mom sighed. "Well, thanks anyway," She turned to Lloyd and Genis. "Come on, boys, let's get going. We should be able to catch up to them by the end of the day if we hurry up."

"Right, mom," Lloyd said and the trio made their way from the tent towards the entrance of Triet. "Where is that place Efreet destroyed anyways?"

"It should be to the south of here," mom said. "I've got a compass, it won't be hard to find. We'll figure out which way south is once we get out of here. We should put on those white robes I bought later, too."

"Oh, okay then."

The trio walked in amicable silence and it took less time then Lloyd knew to reach the entrance of Triet. Lloyd was going to say something but before he had a chance to he was interrupted.

"Wait!" came a masculine voice and Lloyd turned around, feeling confusion course through his system. What greeted his eyes was three Desian soldiers and that confusion soon turned to anger.

"Doesn't he look like the guy in the wanted poster?"

"Let's see…" The other Desian went up to the wanted poster and came back. "Yeah, he looks just like it!"

"Good for you, Lloyd. They say you're good looking."

"Do I really look that bad?"

"No you don't, sweetie."

"You must be Lloyd."

"No, you must be mistaken," mom's voice came out again, as calmly as ever. "This is my nephew Emil. The thing is he looks so plain that he seems to be mistaken for people that he isn't quite a bit although this is the first time that he's been mistaken for a wanted criminal," mom's gaze turned to Lloyd briefly and her eyes looked as though they were telling him to play along. "Something to tell your parents once we get back to Palmacosta, right?"

"Y--yeah, um…Aunt Flora," Lloyd said. _I'm plain looking? Wow, mom…thanks a lot. What happened to handsome?_

"Quite the story. If it's true then why did that kid call him Lloyd if he isn't Lloyd himself?"

"Good question," mom turned to Genis. "Why did you say that?"

"W--well, um…" Genis was not a good liar, especially put on the spot like that. "I saw the poster before and wanted to call Emil that wanted guy's name to see what would happen…"

The Desian smirked under his helmet. "You're bad at lying, kid."

"Oh, please. Have you no sympathy for a young child being tongue-tied when the Desians demand answers and threaten to capture his friend for crimes that he did not commit?"

"If he really didn't commit them then he wouldn't mind coming with us so we can make sure his story checks out."

"You've got to be kidding me. I am not willing to let me and my nephew and his friend fall into Desian clutches."

"Well we're going to have to ask you to come with us," another Desian said, grasping the hilt of his sword. "Your nephew does look a bit too much like that wanted criminal."

"Unbelievable," mom said while dropping the bag of goods that they had bought that day to the ground.

"Mom! What are you doing?"

"So she's your mom is she?"

Lloyd saw mom draw her sword and he drew his own automatically.

"And here I was wanting to get out of this without actually having to fight."

"Stupid woman. You'll pay for lying to us."

"You guys are really starting to piss me off," Lloyd said feeling anger surge through his system.

"Get him," called the Desian.

Lloyd did not allow them the first strike as he ran forward and struck the Desian closest to him. The Desian did not have chance to guard and he struck his midsection again. While using the momentum from it he struck the Desian's sword-bearing arm. He saw fireballs fly past him and towards his opponent and it made him fall to his knees and finally collapse to the ground

Lloyd looked up and saw that mom was keeping the Desian that was attempting to cast a spell at bay while avoiding the other sword-wielder's attempts to stop her. _I really shouldn't be surprised…_ Lloyd thought to himself as he saw a green mana-dense wind pass him and hit the sword-wielder, stunning him for a few moments. Mom took that opportunity to attack the mage and Lloyd felt the mana flow through his body before he unleashed it as a wave of white mana towards the sword-wielder.

That Desian turned towards him while forgetting about mom and ran towards Lloyd with his sword raised. Lloyd held up his own two swords in a guard that he could not recall the name of at the moment. Fireballs flew past him again and landed on the sword-wielding Desian Lloyd was fighting that caused him to stumble backwards. Lloyd automatically thrust his sword into the Desian's chest who soon after fell to the ground. Lloyd looked over to mom but saw that there was no need for his aid. The mage that fell to the ground with mom standing over him, looking at Lloyd.

"Good job, Lloyd. You even used the tierce correctly," mom said, stepping over the bodies. "I'm impressed."

"Heh, uh, thanks mom," Lloyd said feeling himself swell with pride at her words. "They were all talk, anyway."

"I guess so," mom said with a smile. Her gaze dropped for a few moments and then it came to his again. "Did you boys mind all that?"

"All what?" Lloyd felt confusion course through him. After all, it was Desians that came to try to take them away. It's not like they were people, they were monsters.

"Well, it's just that--"

Lloyd felt pain unleash from behind him and he gasped but he could hear nothing and see nothing and feel nothing and all of his world was black.

* * *

"Lloyd!" Genis said feeling fear course through his system at the sight of his best friend face down in the dirt.

"Genis, get ready," Anna said while she was in front of him, holding her sword with her voice low and confident.

"R--right."

He held his kendema and felt the mana flow through himself as he concentrated on a wind spell. He closed his eyes, shutting out any reminder of his friend that lay before him. He unleashed the spell and quickly began the incantation for another. His stomach was doing flip-flops but he tried with all his might to continue the spell. He had to do this. He _had_ to. The wind spell unleashed itself and he opened his eyes to see the progress of the battle. Anna was avoiding their attacks easily enough but she was not landing any blows upon the enemy. One Desian attacked her and the other made his way towards Lloyd. Genis' eyes widened but his legs refused to move.

"Stop, unless you want this kid to lose a limb," the Desian said, holding Lloyd in his grasp, with a knife against his throat. Genis looked to Anna who looked as if she was barely containing the rage that must have been coursing through her. She glared at the Desian that was holding Lloyd before she dropped her sword to the ground.

"Do what you will of me and my son, but let that boy go," Anna said, allowing her gaze to drift to Genis. Genis' eyes widened and his heart began to pound against his chest as the two Desians' gaze was upon him. "He has nothing to do with any of this."

"P--please, mister," Genis said, letting the tears well in his eyes. He knew that he needed to do all he could to be let go and he was willing to use his age as an advantage.

"The leader did say that he only wanted this Lloyd kid. The mother is just a bonus."

"Well…" The Desian that had not taken Lloyd paused in contemplation. He leaned down to grab Anna's sword. "Fine. You are a fellow half-elf, after all," Genis' heart raced, and his gaze quickly turned to Anna who was looking at him with an inquisitive stare, but not the one of disgust that he was expecting. "Get going, kid."

"Th--thanks a lot, mister," Genis said as he backed up, giving Anna a last look.

The Desians and Anna's backs were turned as they began to walk away. The two Desians each took an arm of Lloyd.

"Get your hands off of my son," Anna said.

"Heh, so you want to carry him the whole way to the base?"

"Yes, I will. I don't want either of you touching him."

"Fine," one Desian said. "Less work for us."

The other Desian laughed, and handed Lloyd to her. Lloyd's arm was slung over her shoulder and they then slowly walked away. Genis blinked and he looked over the town and his mind raced. _What am I gonna do? What am I gonna do? What am I--_

Genis felt a nudge on his arm and he looked beside him to see Noishe.

"Hey, Noishe, you saw what happened too, huh?" Noishe looked at Genis. "Let's go save them together."

Noishe lent down and Genis soon understood why. He climbed onto Noishe's back and soon he felt the wind through his hair and he felt a determination to save them both harden in his stomach.


	11. A Foolish Arrangement

_A Foolish Arrangement  
_

The first thing that Lloyd felt when he awoke was a shooting pain from the middle of his back and the first thing he noticed was that the bed that he laid on was really, really hard. He cracked his eyes open and saw a gray ceiling above him. _Wait, what? Gray? Where am I? _Suddenly the events of what had happened came flooding to his head all at once and the images and emotions of what had happened commingled as one. A Desian Ranch, that's where he _must_ be. Anger, panic and fear flew through his system and he jerked himself upwards to a sitting position but the aches of his muscles were suddenly known to him and his head was sent swimming.

"Ungh…" he moaned as he brought his hand to his forehead.

"Lloyd, are you okay? I was so worried about you," came mom's voice and he then met her eyes shaped in concern. Her warm hands came to his shoulders and she gently pushed him back down onto the hard metallic surface. "You shouldn't be getting up yet, sweetie. You've been through so much, you need to get some rest."

"But mom, I can't do that. We're--"

"We're going to be fine."

"Yeah, we will when we escape. But we got captured and--"

"Shh, Lloyd, listen to me," mom said and Lloyd felt a warm hand come to his hair which silenced his words. "It is going to be alright, especially now that you're awake. You gave me a scare, you know that?"

"I--I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault."

"Mom, how can you sound so calm when we got captured? We gotta try to get out of this place."

"I guess I should explain myself," mom said with a small smile. "But first, what

do you last remember?"

"Well, I, uh…" Mom was bent over him with concern etching her features, and he felt her warm hand stroking his hair. He sighed, there was no way he could stay mad with her around. "All I remember is us fighting these Desians and then we talked and…and after that I don't really remember."

"You got attacked from behind with some magic attack by friends of those Desians we downed," mom spoke softly. "You really had me worried, you know. I'm so sorry, I should've been paying more attention."

"What are you talking about?" Lloyd asked with confusion lacing his voice. "This isn't your fault, I thought there were no more Desians too."

"But I'm the one responsible for you."

"No you're not, we're supposed to look out for each other. That's what family does, right? It was just a mistake so don't blame yourself."

"I guess you're right," mom gave him a small smile.

"So what happened after I got knocked out?"

"Well," mom said, and her eyes shifted to a more steely expression. "Me and Genis tried to fend them off but then one of them took you and threatened to hurt you if we didn't stop. Then they took us to this Desian base."

"They what me?" Lloyd said feeling anger course through his system again.

"It's okay, Lloyd, really it is. Don't worry, everything is going to be okay," mom stroked his cheek and he felt the anger drain from his system. Mom's tone hushed. "It's all going to be fine. I got them to let Genis go and I know that Noishe will take him to where Kratos and the others are. They'll come for us, I know it. All we have to do is wait."

Wait? Lloyd did not like the idea of waiting very much, especially when it would put people that he cared about in danger if he did so. He did not want them to get hurt on his account but how was he supposed to tell mom? He slowly rose to a sitting position again and this time he did not feel her warm hands against his head or chest.

"Here," mom said softly and before Lloyd could respond he saw a water flask in her hands as an offering. "You're probably really thirsty, aren't you?"

At the sound of water, Lloyd then realized just how thirsty he was. His tongue went to the top of his dry mouth and he took the flask and brought it to his lips. The water was warm as it passed through his mouth and down his throat but he didn't care, it was water and he needed it. He brought the flask away from his lips as he took a deep breath. He gave the empty flask back to mom and wiped his mouth with his other hand. His head no longer swam and he felt his mind sharpen.

"Thanks, mom."

"You're welcome," mom said as she smiled at him. "It's a good thing I hid this one on me, instead of putting it in that bag."

"What do you mean? Where'd it go?"

"It's still in Triet. I bet someone took it by now."

"What?" Lloyd felt shock course through his system. "You mean that's all the water we've got?"

Mom nodded. "I'm afraid so. They've been withholding food and water for us, probably to keep us weak."

"You should've told me, we could've shared it," Lloyd said, moving his feet to the side of the metallic bed. "That means that you haven't had any--"

"It's okay, Lloyd, really it is," mom said while she lifted herself from her kneeling position on the floor to sit beside him. "I'd be lying if I said I was fine, but I'll manage."

"You're sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," mom said as she smiled and took his hand into hers. "I'd rather you have it, anyway."

"Why's that?" Lloyd said feeling confusion course through his being.

"Because you're my baby boy and I love you," she said with a smile and Lloyd felt a kind of happiness that he had barely felt course through him. His mother was worried about him, and was taking care of him and even told him that he loved him. It felt good to know that. Her smile broke suddenly, and her features changed to a sort of panic. "Oh, I'm sorry. I must be embarrassing you--"

"There's nothing to be sorry about, mom. Actually…I kinda like it. Uh, could you say stuff like that more often?"

Her chapped lips broke into a big smile and Lloyd felt a happiness course through his system. "Alright, I think that's something I can do. You'll regret it later when you're sick of your old mother smothering you."

"No way! I couldn't get sick of that, not ever. Truth is," Lloyd said as he lowered her voice and he looked away from her eyes feeling embarrassed. "I always wanted a mom to say stuff like that to me and worry about me and tell me how much they care about me. I might've had a dad back in Iselia, but I didn't have you. I was always so jealous of all the other kids and their moms…it just didn't seem fair."

"Lloyd," mom's voice was laced in emotion and he felt her squeeze his hand gently. "It's the same with me. I always wanted to be near you even though I couldn't. Believe it or not, not a day went by that I didn't think about you. I love being with you now."

"Me too," Lloyd said feeling a thrill course through him. "I guess we both wanted each other, huh."

"Guess so. We have so much time to make up for and if you really want me to, I'll tell you how much I love you everyday."

"Seriously? That'd be awesome," Lloyd said turning his gaze from the metallic floor and energy shield in front of him to her eyes, feeling excitement course through him. "Love you mom."

"Love you too," mom said with that same smile across her face and she squeezed his hand again. Lloyd smiled back at her, feeling a joy course through him at what mom had said. He felt her hand slip out of his and her arms come about him in an embrace, and he lent forward and put his arms about her.

"Say, mom?" Lloyd said. "How long have we been here for?"

"Not sure, it's hard to tell time in here. I did see the guards change once. If they have eight hour shifts then…well, you can do the math."

"I can?"

Lloyd felt her chest reverberate and heard her chuckle. "Don't worry about it, I won't bug you about school in here."

Lloyd felt relief course through him. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it, sweetie."

"Don't you think we should try getting out of here on our own?" Lloyd said with his voice low. "It'll help them out."

"I'm open to suggestions," mom said with her voice low as she unwrapped her arms that were about him. "I've looked this cell up and down but I don't think that there's any flaws in it. We're stuck waiting for them."

"Hmm," Lloyd said, and began to think as he studied the small room. Mom was right, he couldn't see anything wrong with the cell at all. At least, nothing obvious. Then a realization struck him. The sorcerer's ring. He looked to his right hand and saw the red and black ring there and he then turned his gaze towards the energy barrier closing the cell.

"Mom, I got an idea," Lloyd said and brought his hand with the sorcerer's ring up. "Hope it works."

"Alright, just be careful, Lloyd," mom said. Lloyd nodded as Lloyd got up towards the energy barrier and looked outside for any Desian that would see, but he saw no Desian patrolling the area then. This was his chance. He let the fire of the sorcerer's ring out just like he remembered it and unleashed it towards the energy barrier. The barrier disappeared and Lloyd grinned.

"C'mon, mom," Lloyd said, turning towards mom. "Let's get out of here."

"You don't have to tell me twice," mom said as she rose from her seat and came to Lloyd's side.

"Hey! Just what do you think you're doing?" Came a masculine voice and Lloyd turned his head to find a Desian unsheathing his weapon. "Don't move."

"Lloyd," came mom's whisper. "Our weapons should be nearby, find them. I'll take care of this goon

Lloyd nodded, and he moved away from the cell's entrance to the right.

"What did I just say?" the Desian's voice was laced in aggression and he came towards Lloyd with his sword raised. Lloyd began to run. "Stop right no--aaagh."

Lloyd turned around, feeling surprise course through him at the unexpected sound of the Desian's scream. He saw mom who had her hands around the Desian's arm, twisting it, and she had his sword in her hand with the blade resting against his neck. Just how did she do that?

"Listen to what I have to say to you if you want to live," mom said with her voice dangerous and low. "I want you to go into the cell next to the one I was in. When I start moving, you move with me."

"Y--yeah," the Desian said and mom got him to start to move.

"Hey," mom said and they stopped. "Where are our weapons hidden?"

"Th--there," the Desian said, pointing past Lloyd. "I--it's behind the desk."

"Good. Now keep moving," mom said and they moved again. She pushed him inside of the cell with the Desian's sword raised towards the man. "Lloyd, could you push that button at the side?"

"Yeah, sure," Lloyd said and he went up to the panel and pushed the only button that he saw. An energy barrier flickered to life and the Desian glared at them but did not say a word. Mom let his sword clatter to the ground.

"We should get going," mom said turning to him. "Let's get our weapons back, shall we?"

Lloyd nodded and he went to the desk, and saw the swords leaning against the gray wall behind it. He walked towards them and soon took the belt of his swords and hooked them around his waist. It felt somewhat comforting to have the familiar weight of his swords on him again. He saw mom's sword and turned around to offer it to her.

"Hey, thanks," mom said as she took it and hooked the belt to her waist. "Let's get out of here. Don't be too reckless, now."

"I won't," Lloyd said, and they then walked towards the door and Lloyd steeled himself for the dangers that the Desian Base would hold for him.

Lloyd walked across the empty metallic hallways of the Desian Base in silence. Mom was walking by his side but refused to have a conversation with him, telling him that it was far too dangerous to let their guard down in the base and that their banter could draw unwanted attention. Lloyd knew that she was right, but still it did nothing to ease the unease that he felt coiled inside of himself. They turned a corner and climbed stairs upwards and continued to walk.

"Hey, you!" came the shout of a Desian voice and Lloyd felt adrenaline flood through him and he looked about him, to find a door to his side. "What are you doing here?"

"Mom, in here," Lloyd said while grabbing her arm with one hand and opening the door with another.

"Right," mom said and she followed him into the room and they slammed it shut behind them. Lloyd took no notice of what the room looked like and instead turned to mom, taking his hand off of her arm.

"That was close, wasn't it?"

"You," mom said flatly, ignoring what Lloyd said while looking somewhere else. Lloyd felt confusion course through him and he looked to where her gaze was fixated on. It was a man in a cape with striking blue hair.

"So this must be Lloyd," the man said, ignoring her words. He turned his inquisitive gaze to Lloyd and mom's stance stiffened as she slowly moved in front of him.

"And what if I am?"

"Hmm, I see the resemblance."

"So you're with them. So this is what you're doing to help," mom said with surprise lacing her voice, and Lloyd felt confusion course through him. Just what did she mean? "You know, I think I'm glad that I didn't take you up on that offer before."

"I'm not. It would've made my plans speed up."

"I think I can wager a guess at these plans."

"Oh?"

"Mom, do you know this guy?" Lloyd asked, wanting answers to the myriad of questions that were filling his head.

"We've met," mom said, her eyes never leaving the man.

The man's hand came up, and Lloyd saw a magic attack quickly charge, and then unleash into the air, towards mom. Lloyd's instincts took over and he wrapped his arms about mom and put his weight on her, letting them collapse to the ground. He felt anger course through his being and quickly got to his feet and unsheathed his swords, looking at the man in contempt.

"What the hell do you think you were trying to do to my mom?" Lloyd unsheathed his swords and advanced on him.

"Lloyd, stop this," mom said behind him, and Lloyd did not turn to see her.

"No way, didn't you see what he--"

"I know, but you don't understand," mom said, and Lloyd felt her hand on his arm. "This guy is really strong. If you fight him, he could kill you. Wouldn't put it past him, either."

"You should listen to your mother, Lloyd," the man said and Lloyd glared at him, feeling only vehemence towards the man that he did not know. "I only need one of you alive."

"And just what is that supposed to mean?" Lloyd felt anger overtake his mind and it was only mom's hand that stopped him from striking.

"Stop, Lloyd."

"Your mother should--"

"Sir," Lloyd saw three Desians enter the room from the corner of his eye. A familiar stance and brown hair made Lloyd turn to him and narrow his eyes. It was him. "We've received reports that the Chosen's group has infiltrated the facility."

"You," Lloyd said while feeling anger course through him. "You're the Desian that attacked Iselia!

"So you're Lloyd. Now this is amusing."

"Humph, it doesn't matter where I go now. Our plans are ruined, he'll soon know everything. We should evacuate--"

"No. You don't have to do that. I won't tell anyone about this. Lloyd," mom's eyes turned to Lloyd's and her eyes looked desperate, like she needed him to listen. She squeezed his arm. "Please, Lloyd, this is very important. We can talk about this later but don't tell anyone about anything that happened in this room."

Lloyd felt further confusion course through him. He did not know what was going on but he knew that the one person he could trust was mom, so he would do what she wanted him to. He could always ask later, anyway.

"Y--yeah, sure thing mom."

"Thank you," her eyes now held relief and he wondered what would have possibly made her so anxious. _It's that damned Desian's fault._

"Botta, come. Bring your men as well, we need to leave before he gets here."

"What of the Chosen?" The man asked, moving with the other Desians towards the man with the blue hair. The man that attacked Iselia now had a name. _Botta, I'll remember that._

"Leave her for now. It'll be one token of gratitude. We wouldn't want certain women changing their minds, now would we?"

"Understood," the man said, and the group of Desians left through the door.

"Mom," they were both left in the room alone what was that?"

"I'll explain later, just for now…please just do what I say."

"O--okay," Lloyd said, not used to this side of mom.

Swords were still in his hands, he realized, and he sheathed them both. He shifted his gaze from his sheathes to mom and he felt startled. For the first time since they had been captured did Lloyd really see how much mom was affected by it. Her features were etched in exhaustion and she looked as if she wanted to be somewhere else.

"Hey, are you--"

"Lloyd, Anna," Genis' voice interrupted his train of thought and he turned to find all those that he did not expect to see. "Are you two okay?"

"Are you all right?" Colette asked, turning her blue gaze in between his and mom's. It was just like Colette to ask those things. Lloyd felt a thrill course through him at the idea of all of them going through a Desian Base just for him. "Are you hurt?"

"He looks fine," came dad's voice that sounded strangely calm. Lloyd turned his gaze towards him and his brown eyes that softened slightly moments after they met each other's gaze. "It's good to see you both again."

"Yeah, you too, dad. I thought it was going to be months before I saw you next."

"As did I," dad said before walking towards them but his gaze was fixed on mom. "Anna, are you alright?"

"Hmm?" Mom said softly, then turned her head upwards to gaze at dad. _Good, dad's talking to her,_ Lloyd thought, remembering how exhausted she looked before. _I almost forgot._ "Oh, Kratos, I'm fine."

"Somehow I don't believe that," dad said, looking at mom with concern etching his features. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, really."

"Right!" Lloyd said as a realization struck him. How did he forget it up to now? How stupid was he? "Mom didn't drink any water since she got here."

"Oh," Genis said. "I saw her carry Lloyd from Triet, she must've kept that up all the way here."

"Really?" dad's voice was laced in interest. "Tell me, Anna, how much sleep have you gotten since you came here?"

"None."

Dad sighed and he brought his hand somewhere that Lloyd could not see. His hand then bore a water flask which he offered to mom. "Here, take it. You don't have to push yourself any longer."

"Thank you," mom said as she reached for the flask and brought it into her hands. She untied the opening and brought it to her lips. _Wouldn't mom normally say something different? She barely said anything, _Lloyd thought to himself while he shifted from foot to foot. _I guess she really is out of it. Ugh, why didn't I notice until now?_

"Thanks," mom's voice brought him back to reality and she offered the flask back to dad.

"So you've told me," dad said as he took the flask.

"Huh…guess I did already say it."

"Don't worry, these are the last of my water rations but there will be plenty of water in Triet. We could carve cacti along the way but I think it would be foolish to stop for that long, in case we are attacked from Desians from this base."

"I can wait."

"You sure mom? You don't look so good."

"You can take my water Mrs--uh, I mean, Anna," came Colette's voice and Lloyd saw as she moved across the metallic floor towards mom. Lloyd smiled, Colette was the same.

"I can't, this is yours."

"But--"

"Raine, you're back," Genis said, and Lloyd turned to him and saw Professor Sage standing by him. "You finally opened the escape route."

"Professor," Lloyd said, walking to her.

"Ah, Lloyd. Genis told me what happened," Professor Sage said, and gave a fleeting glance to Genis. "I apologize for the trouble he's caused you."

"No," Lloyd said. He did not want Genis to get any blame for something that was his fault. "I'm the one that dragged Genis into it. I'm sorry."

"Save the chitchat for later," dad's voice was again laced in a sense of urgency. "We shouldn't stay here long."

"You're right. I opened the escape route just now. Let's go."

"Lloyd," came dad's voice that stilled Lloyd's movements from following Professor Sage's lead of leaving the room. Dad then continued to exit and Lloyd mimicked his movements without thinking. "You should keep an eye on your mother.

"I tried! I just didn't notice that she was like this here--"

"No," dad said, silencing Lloyd's words and his panic. "That's not what I meant."

"Then what did you mean?"

"I think that if we're not careful that she could collapse in heatstroke."

"What?" Lloyd said feeling shock course through him.

"Don't worry, she should be fine as long as the pace is slow. She already has had plenty of water to last her for the journey to Triet."

"But she only had your flask," dad motioned behind them and Lloyd turned his head to look over his shoulder. Lloyd saw mom and Colette, keeping pace behind them and mom was drinking from a water flask. _That must be Colette's…_ Lloyd thought feeling relief and gratitude course through his system. _I'll have to thank her later._

"Doesn't it feel better to not be thirsty?" Colette asked mom with a small smile as mom drew the flask away from her lips.

"Yes, it does," mom said while she chuckled and offered the flask back to Colette. "Thanks, Colette. You're a very nice girl."

"Well, uh, thanks. I just try to do my best," Colette said after she giggled in delight. Her eyes turned from mom and caught Lloyd's. "Oh, Lloyd."

Colette ran up to his side and Lloyd had to turn his head back to see what was in front of him.

"Ow…"

"Is something wrong?" Colette asked with concern lacing her voice. Lloyd met her eyes.

"It's nothing. I just, kind of have a kink in my neck."

"I'm sorry."

"Why are you apologizing? It's not like this is your fault."

"You're right, I'm sorry."

"Stop--ah, never mind," Lloyd gave up again. For some reason, it felt good to hear that habit of hers again. Lloyd looked to his other side and found dad was not there anymore. "Hey, where's dad?"

"You mean Kratos? Um, I dunno," Colette looked around and pointed behind her. "I see! He's there with your mom."

"Heh, well good," Lloyd said, running a hand through his hair. For some reason he did not think that he was going to hate being on the Journey of Regeneration even if he couldn't be on it for the whole way. At least he got to see Colette again.


	12. Underneath the Stars

_A/N: Happy Canadian Thanksgiving! Yes, Canada's Thanksgiving is different then America's. Something to do with the harvest and not the Pilgrim's from back in the day in America. Anyway, I hope you enjoy your weekend. I also named this chapter after a song by The Cure._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Tales of Symphonia._

_

* * *

_

_Underneath the Stars_

The day had darkened into night and Kratos walked along the paths of Triet that had emptied of the throngs of people that once inhabited it. The only ones that remained on the streets were hurrying to their homes. _It__'__s no surprise, considering how close they are to a Renegade Base. People seem to be paranoid of the dark, thinking it more dangerous for an attack_, Kratos thought as he continued his trek to the marketplace and searched for the merchant that he had convinced to retrieve what he needed earlier in the day. She was easy enough to find, as her stall was the only one that had not closed for the night.

"Good evening. I trust you have the two items that I've paid for," Kratos asked, as he looked into her brown eyes that were surrounded by dark skin.

"And you are?" she asked as she tilted her head to one side, and her dark hair and hoop earrings glittered in the new slant of moonlight that came between the shadows of the buildings.

"Kratos."

"Ah, yes, of course, I remember you now. Just a moment, please," the woman said as she ducked under her stall table and Kratos heard her golden bangles softly jingle about her wrists as she rose and stretched out her arm with a small bag in her hand. "There you are, Kratos."

"Thank you," Kratos said as he tossed a few gald coins onto the wooden table and grasped the soft cloth in his hand, feeling the hard surface of what lay beneath. "Especially for dealing with the chain maker for me."

"Oh, it's no problem at all, given the proper incentive I don't mind going to any end for a client," she said with a wink as she reached for the gald that Kratos had dropped. "I hope you don't forget that the next time you're in need of services such as mine."

"Of course," Kratos said as he inclined his head. He knew that there would be no further need of the services of a glass maker who seemed very willing to broaden her services for a price.

"A pleasure doing business with you."

"You as well," Kratos said curtly as he turned about and began to walk away and towards the inn.

The light of the full moon cast the buildings shadows across the sand path that he traversed and he drove out all thoughts of Anna that he knew would lead to a distraction, he refused to allow his guard down in case a Renegade or even a thief to attack. The moon and stars provided ample lighting and Kratos allowed his senses to be aware of anything that seemed amiss. He came to the inn entrance soon enough, and noticed that Noishe was absent from the stall he had occupied earlier. Curiosity rose in him, but he knew more then any that Noishe was not obligated to stay with them, he was free to wander where he wished. Kratos made a mental note to ask Noishe of it later as he slowly opened the wooden door and closed it behind himself.

The room was dark save a few candles which served as meagre lighting. The innkeeper looked up from his book behind the desk and greeted him in a nod. Kratos returned it before he turned his direction to the room that he, Anna and Lloyd were residing in. Lloyd had insisted that he stay in their room, instead of sharing it with one of his friends since he had said he wanted to be with his parents. Kratos smiled as he opened the wooden door to their room and entered and closed the door behind him His eyes adjusted to the darkness quickly.

Lloyd had taken the bed closest to the door and he was sprawled out on his belly as he slept, with the blankets kicked about him haphazardly. Kratos shook his head in amusement and walked towards him. Perhaps having Lloyd around would not be as bad for his son as he initially thought. Surely having his real father around could do nothing but help the boy and it would be nice to have some time to guide him, even if their time together was short. Kratos grabbed the thin woollen blankets and untangled what he was able to and brought them towards his neck.

Kratos looked across to the other beds to find the one that he knew Anna had taken. The blankets and pillow were tossed in a fashion that looked as if it had been used but it was empty of Anna. He frowned. Where would she go at this time of night? She should be resting now, she had even fallen asleep before any because of her exhaustion. His eyes roved the area and discovered that there was no water flask on her bed-side table. She must have taken it to get some water at the oasis, although why she decided to go there alone at this time of night he could only imagine. Her sword was leaning against the wall among Lloyd's swords. Kratos' frown deepened and concern formed in the pit of his stomach. Wherever she had gone, she had gone unarmed. After the episode with the Renegades he had no idea she could be so careless.

Kratos placed the small bag that he carried inside of the drawer in the bedside table closest to his own bed before he turned abruptly and walked out of the room, careful to tread lightly as not to awaken Lloyd. He walked across the floor of the inn main room quickly enough and soon was outside, with the bright light of the moon and the stars. It took him little time to reach the oasis and the first thing that he noticed was unusual. It was Noishe, whose white fur glistened in the moonlight and he laid on the sand as he stared out past the dock and towards the oasis. Noishe's eyes caught his and he whined as he got up and walked towards him.

"Hello, Noishe. What are you doing here?" Kratos asked as he looked into his familiar brown eyes. Noishe whined again as his ears went down and turned to look at the dock. Kratos followed his gaze and his eyes widened. There was the darkened outline of Anna, who was sitting on the dock. It was obvious to enough to Kratos that water was not the only reason that she had left. If it was then she would not be sitting down and she would be drinking from her flask.

"Thank you, old friend," he murmured to Noishe as he stroked his soft fur. He knew that Noishe had followed Anna because he was worried about her. Perhaps he knew of more to be concerned of then Kratos and that lack of knowledge caused his concern to solidify inside of him. Just what had happened in Iselia that caused her to act like this? Noishe's head nuzzled against and he pushed Kratos' hand towards the direction of the dock. Kratos took the hint and began to walk towards the dock, hearing his footfalls change from the soft pad of the sand to the loud creak of the old, wooden dock.

"Hello, Anna," Kratos said as approached her and he lowered himself to sit beside her. She quickly turned to him, with her eyes wide in surprise.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she looked angrily animated and Kratos felt inwardly amused, feeling his concern lessen.

"Did I do anything wrong?" Kratos asked with a shrug of his shoulders as he feigned ignorance.

"You know what you did," Anna said with irritation lacing her voice. "You scared me, you know."

"I suppose I did," he said, inwardly relieved that she seemed to be herself again. "Why did you decide to go out here in the middle of the night?"

"That's none of your business," Anna's voice was louder. He was relieved too soon, it seemed. Normally Anna would not grow so angry so fast with this little provocation. Perhaps she needed more rest. "I'll have you know that I can go anywhere I want."

"I see," Kratos chuckled as he shifted his legs to stretch them out in front of himself. "Now is it a good idea to go 'anywhere you want' unarmed?"

"Wait, what?" her eyes widened in confusion and she took her hand in the futile effort to find her sword.

"You're out in the middle of the night unarmed, right after you escaped from the Renegade Base, I might add. It's dangerous."

"You're right I guess," she said sighing, submitting easily and Kratos was left puzzled. "I just--I wasn't thinking, that's all."

"Hmm," Kratos said. She must still be weak if she had not noticed that he changed the topic, especially if her change in mood was so sudden. Perhaps she needed to regain her strength some other way.

"What?"

"Shouldn't you be drinking water?"

"I guess so…" Anna said looking down to the flask in her hand before drawing her eyes to him again. "What's that got to do with anything?"

"Nothing, I suppose. It's just that you don't seem well," Kratos said as he paused. "You've been acting strange ever since we've met each other again. I know that it's because you pushed yourself too hard but don't worry. Everyone agreed for us to stay in Triet for another day or so while you recover."

"Wait a second, what do you mean by acting strange?" Anna said, ignoring what else he had said entirely. He smiled at that. "And just what are you smiling about?"

"There's no need to be so angry."

"And what is that--" she stopped herself and took a deep breath before she sighed. "I'm sorry. I know you're right it's just that…that, well, I guess it's just everything that's happened. I don't feel like normal."

"I know," Kratos' voice was laced in concern as he nodded in empathy. "It cannot be easy being captured by the Renegades while pushing yourself so."

"It's not that," Anna said and she lost his eye contact, instead turning her attention to the vast water that stretched before them. She brought her flask to her lips for a drink.

"Oh?" Kratos felt curiosity rise in him that mingled with his concern.

"Well, it's that…" she trailed off as she closed her eyes as she shivered. Kratos frowned and saw that gooseflesh was emerging on her exposed skin. It was cold, he supposed, but the cold never had bothered him as it did Anna. Kratos moved closer to her and wrapped his arm about her, feeling her skin which was far too cold then his liking.

"What's wrong?" Kratos asked as he moved his arm up and down, trying to get her warm. "It's alright, Anna. If something is troubling you, know that you can tell me. You should know that already."

"I do know that, it's just that…" she trailed off again. "I--I don't want to talk about it."

"Even if it is hard, perhaps it would make you feel better to talk to someone," Kratos said slowly but his words were met with her silence. The breeze which shifted the sands and left small ripples in the water was the only noise that he could hear. She shivered again despite the warmth from his arm, then an idea came to him to lift her spirits. If she did not want to talk, then he would not make her. He tightened his hold about her as he brought his other arm under her legs.

"H--hey, what are you--" her question was cut off as he lifted her easily above the dock. She began to giggle and Kratos felt amusement rise in him as she kicked the air and wriggled in his arms. He moved his legs apart and set her down between them, before wrapping both arms about her belly and gently pushed her back towards his chest.

"Hey," Anna said when her laughter subsided and she turned around, her face close to his, and looked up at him with playful eyes and a smile that graced her lips. "Just what do you think you're doing?"

"You mean what did I just do," Kratos said matching her smile as he felt an inward victory and dissipating her melancholic mood.

"Don't play games with me, Kratos Aurion," Anna said with her voice laced with false anger, but her features betrayed the tone.

"I noticed that you were cold and I wanted to correct it," Kratos said with a smile. "I was expecting more gratitude then this."

"Thank you so much. You're now serving as my blanket," Anna said flatly and Kratos chuckled. "Hey! Don't laugh at me."

"And why shouldn't I?"

"Well…because it's rude," Anna said as she turned her head from him and settled herself against his chest. "Besides, I was perfectly comfortable where I was."

"You were comfortable shivering in the cold?"

"It's not my fault the desert can be really hot in the day and really cold in the night."

"You wouldn't have the problem if you changed to your angelic form from time to time," Kratos said. She stiffened in his embrace and he frowned. That was not the reaction he had anticipated.

"I don't want to."

"Why not? I know that you despise the form but if it would save you from any unnecessary suffering, there's--"

"I said no," Anna's voice was harsh and low with no trace of humour. "I can't believe I'm hearing you say that."

"You put yourself and Lloyd in danger when you escaped from the Renegades. I have every right to say this."

"I did _not_ put Lloyd in danger, he's fine," Anna's voice was laced with anger of her own. "Human women have a thing called maternal instinct. I'd never let them hurt him."

"And what about you?"

"I'm fine."

"No you're not. You could have collapsed from heatstroke, and here you are now out in the middle of the night with no weapon. You did not even hear my approach. You are anything but 'fine'."

"But I didn't collapse, and it ended up just being you tonight not some Renegade. There is no way that I'm going to let you use that as an excuse for me to go into that damned form."

"Must you be so stubborn," Kratos raised his voice. "You know I'm right."

"Oh, of course, of course, I must be a stupid, stubborn woman to not want to be something that I hate just to avoid a little pain. Yes, that makes perfect sense. I've just got to be stubborn," Anna's voice was laced in vehemence, the like that Kratos was not used to hearing. "I hate that form, I hate it more then anything. Whenever I'm in it, it makes me feel like where I was before and how I felt like I was slowly becoming a…a puppet. Hell, I felt like I was becoming on of these lifeless beings. I had no choice before to not feel but now I _do_."

"I see," Kratos said, feeling shock course through him. He knew that Anna disliked her angelic form, but he had no idea that it was such a deep-rooted hatred. He should have known that and he cursed himself that this was the first that he was hearing of it. Perhaps he should have asked her before when they were on Derris-Kharlan, it had never occurred to him before the amount that she loathed it. Even so, her angelic form would give her an advantage to any opponent that she would face. Surely she would not deny that? "What of being in your angelic form in times of danger only? Surely that can't remind you of what you hate so much."

"But it will! Don't you get it? I love being human, I really do. I missed it so much before," Anna continued, with the vehemence in her tone draining. "Even if it means that it's a little harder every now and then, it's still worth it. I love everything about it. I like being hungry and being thirsty and feeling energetic and feeling if it's hot or cold. I like feeling your heat right now," Anna said and Kratos felt her hand against his arm. "But I always was able to feel your warmth, even on Derris-Kharlan. I broke the rule with you."

"As did I," Kratos admitted softly, as he moved one of his hands towards hers, lacing his fingers with hers. It was cool from the cold of the night, but he did not care. "I'm human when I'm alone with you. I always was."

"Really? Even now?"

"Yes," Kratos said as he felt amusement rise in him at the eagerness in her voice. "It's become instinct, I think, to be human when I'm with you. There are human reactions that I still have to you that I'd prefer to always feel."

"You mean that you like the way I make you feel?"

"If you really want to put it like that."

"Say it," Anna said. She turned around and looked him in the eye. "I dare you."

"Alright," Kratos said and he chuckled. Her lips curved to a smile. " 'I like the way you make me feel.' "

"Well that was easy."

"You were expecting it to be hard?"

"Maybe," Anna said flatly and Kratos chuckled again.

She always could lighten his spirits, he had missed talking to her like this. Kratos felt her tangled hair as she moved her head to rest in between his shoulder and arm. Her head shifted against him and he felt warm lips against his arm and her warm and gentle breath against his skin. His eyes widened and he felt his heartbeat speed up and a warmth envelop his belly. He had not expected her to initiate any affection towards him, especially not now. It may have been because of her dehydration or exhaustion but somehow he did not want to believe that. It may not be love but she had missed him. It made sense, she had said that many times before he left Iselia.

Kratos leant down and pressed his lips against her hair that was tangled from her travels. He kissed her again and again and made his way to her soft cheek in slow movements. Her head moved against his chest and came towards his face and his gentle kisses along her cheek slowly came to her lips. He felt a renewed warmth come over himself as his lips were pressed softly against her own, yet he was apprehensive, unwilling to allow the intensity that a part of him yearned for to be unleashed. Her lips moved to his bottom lip before he felt her warm breath that exhaled against his skin.

"If you like being human with me," Anna said softly, and he felt her warm breath against his chin. "Why not be human all the time?"

"Anna," he said, in a reprimanding tone as he gazed into her eyes that matched his defiantly. He forgot the affections that they had just exchanged and he fleetingly wondered if she had engaged in them to make him agree. "You know what happened the last--"

"Yes, I know that you blame yourself for what happened. If you were able to be an angel then you think you could've stopped Kvar--"

"I could have," Kratos said with his voice low and sharp and he tightened his hold on her. "I should have. I was a fool to give up my angelic form, even if it was for you, and I refuse to make that mistake again."

"It's not a mistake," Anna said as she stiffened in his hold.

"Yes, it is. I will not have you or Lloyd die because of this--this foolishness," Kratos said, but quickly changed the subject. "Now, Anna, now would you promise me something?"

"You didn't hear me out."

"I will, just please, consider what I have to say first."

"Fine."

"Before you answer, think of Lloyd. Would you agree to change into your angelic form whenever you feel that you're in danger? It doesn't even have to be during times that I deem dangerous, you can make the decision when the time comes."

"I will," Anna said and Kratos felt surprise course through him. He had not expected her to agree so readily despite his wishes for her to. "But under one condition."

"Anything."

"How about a compromise?"

"A compromise?"

"Yeah," Anna said, with a weary voice. She must be exhausted, his warmth could not help her stay awake. "I'll go to my angelic form whenever it seems kind of dangerous."

"And?"

"Would you do the same?"

Kratos did not know if he heard it correctly. "What do you mean?"

"Well…if you think it's too dangerous then you go to your angelic form and knowing you it's probably going to be a lot more then me," Anna gave him a small smile. "But if it's anytime else, even if I'm not there with you, would you be human? I just don't think that it's something that you should miss out on, even if it isn't for that long."

"Anna, I…" Kratos was speechless, not knowing how to respond. "You'd be willing to cope with your angelic form for me…"

"Yeah," she responded as he felt her body relax against his own and she turned to rest her head against his chest. "I guess I would. Being human is important. I just, I don't want you to miss out on something like this, it's gonna be your last chance to be this way again."

"I think that I'd be willing to accept this compromise," Kratos said and he felt her lips meet his arm in response.

"Great," her voice held a hint of smile. "I just know that you're going to love it."

"It's nice having you worry about me again."

"Don't I always?"

"Not like this. You've given up something that you love for me."

"It's not like I'm always going to be in that form, you know."

"But you will be in the form more then you want to," Kratos kissed the side of her head. "Thank you."

"You're welcome. I don't mind doing something like that if it's for you," Anna said and Kratos felt surprise course through him. Was she acting like this because she knew that he would be gone from her life soon? He found it hard to believe that she would do it because of her now barely existent love for him. No matter, whatever the reason it meant that she still cared. "I want you to feel the best you can when you're with Lloyd. Oh, that reminds me, I hope you don't mind but I kind of already told Lloyd that you'd be willing to teach him."

"Swordsmanship?"

"Um, everything, actually. I know it'd be a lot of work but Lloyd said that he understands things more coming from you then his own teacher," Anna said with apprehension. Kratos felt a strange thrill at the thought of teaching Lloyd. Perhaps he could allow his son to learn a taste of his thousands of years of experience. "I'm sorry, you don't have to. I shouldn't have said that you would do it, it was stupid of me--"

"Anna, what are you talking about? I'd love to teach Lloyd."

"Oh," Anna said and Kratos smiled.

"Are you surprised?"

"No," she said all too quickly.

"Then why do you sound surprised?"

"It must be your imagination, that's all."

"The imagination that I don't have," Kratos' voice was tinged with sarcasm. "I believe you."

"Okay, okay, fine. You win, I admit it, I was surprised."

"Good, you've finally come to your senses," his response was met by her laughter and he smiled. "Tell me, how did your training with Lloyd go?"

"It was terrible. I told you, I'm terrible at teaching."

"Are you sure you're not just over-exaggerating?"

"Yes, I'm sure. I didn't know where to begin and I don't think Lloyd got much of anything out of what I told him and I kind of…stole his sword."

Kratos raised an eyebrow. "Stole his sword?"

"You see! Now you can't deny that I'm bad at teaching. You're going to take it over, right?"

"I don't know," Kratos said, feigning seriousness. "I think that you could continue. I'm sure that after a--"

"No, please, don't, I can't do this," Anna's voice was panicked and Kratos could not hold back his chuckle. "I--wait a second. You're not serious."

"No."

"So you'll take over Lloyd's training?"

"I'll think about it," Kratos said with a smile.

"Oh, ha ha. I hope you're happy."

"Very much so," he said softly as he tightened his hold on her, feeling her warm breath against his arm and he leaned his cheek against her hair. "I've missed this. I've missed you, more then I thought I would."

"Where's this coming from? I thought we were talking about Lloyd."

"We were."

"And now you're telling me about how much you missed me?"

"Yes," Kratos smiled and his response was met by her laughter.

"Missed you too. I know it wasn't that long but I thought it was going to be longer," Anna said and her warm forehead leant against his arm. "Much longer."

"As did I, although I doubt that you came here on the best of terms," Kratos said, debating with himself whether or not to broach the topic. "I've heard what happened that made you and Lloyd leave Iselia."

Anna stiffened in his embrace.

"I know that it must have been hard on you."

"Can we not talk about this?"

"Why not?"

"It's just that," Anna paused before she collected herself. "I--it's nothing. I can handle it on my own, really."

"I'm sure that you can, but do you want to handle it on your own?" silence met his question but he continued unabated. "Is that why you went out here all alone this late at night?"

"Sort of. I was thirsty too."

"Really? Is that why you've been drinking so much water?" Kratos asked incredulously as he gestured with his hand to the nearly forgotten flask that lay beside them on the dock.

"Why do you have to notice stuff like that?"

Kratos frowned, and did not respond. He knew exactly what she was trying to do and he would not let her take the conversation to a lighter tone. He needed to know what was troubling her, he wanted to comfort her and help her through it. He knew Anna well and he knew that she would not take the deaths of those in Iselia lightly. She would have desired to help them all, and it was those parts of Anna that stood unchanging through all the time that he had known her. Those were parts of her, among many, that he loved.

"Fine," she said finally, breaking the silence that had settled between them. "It didn't feel right thinking about it with Lloyd in the same room as me."

"Anna," Kratos said in a reprimanding tone. "You can think about it anywhere."

"No I can't. I couldn't let myself think about it before when I was with Genis and Lloyd, they were already so beat up about what happened. I couldn't just act like that myself, that wouldn't help them at all. They needed me to be strong for them so I was. I still can be but I don't have to every minute anymore. I need to think about it on my own."

"You don't have to think about it alone, I'm here," Kratos said softly, realizing that she had not only pushed herself physically but emotionally as well. A strong protective edge came over him and he knew that he needed to comfort her. He caressed her hand and brushed his lips against her hair. "You don't need to be strong when you're with me."

"I--I…" Anna said and she said nothing else, and he gathered that she was collecting the myriad of thoughts that must have plagued her. Kratos would wait for her to be ready, he wanted her to speak on her own terms. "Thank you, Kratos. I know that you're trying to help me and I'm grateful, really I am. This is just something that I need to deal with on my own."

"But--"

"No, please don't," Anna said and she turned towards him, meeting his eyes with her own. They were a mixture of emotions that Kratos found difficult to identify. "I know what you're trying to do but I just can't talk about it with you."

"Is it because you blame me for what happened in Iselia?"

"No! That's not it at all! It's not like you ordered the attack or anything," there was a note of panic in her voice and Kratos felt relief flood through him. He was still fearful, as ever, that she would grow to hate him. He could tolerate it but he did not want to.

"Then why is it that you won't talk to me of it?"

"I--well…I can't tell you."

"This isn't some attempt to keep me from worrying about you, is it?" Kratos asked and he rose his hand to her cheek. "If so, it's not working."

"It's not that," Anna said as she smiled at him. "It's just something that I want to deal with on my own."

"But you don't have to. Don't you see, you're not alone anymore."

She gave a hollow laugh. "Don't you think that's what I should tell you? You're the one that didn't have me or Lloyd."

"Anna," Kratos' voice was low and serious. "Don't change the subject, this is not about me."

"Well it should be."

"If you're worried about me for whatever reason, then we can talk about it later. Right now I want to--"

"But I don't want to," her voice was growing more strained and more panicked. Kratos frowned. Just what was she hiding? "I don't want to talk to you about it, I don't want to talk to anyone--"

"You're being absurd."

"No I'm not."

Kratos sighed and felt a flash of irritation pass his mind.

"Is it because of the people that died in Iselia?"

"A bit," Anna said, but her tone noted that this was not what was causing her such strain. "I need to mourn on my own time, alone. I'll pray for them and hope that their families will be alright. And don't you think that I think that this is my fault 'cause I don't and it's bad enough that Lloyd thinks that it's his."

"Is it really?"

"Yes. It was the Desians that attacked Iselia, not Lloyd. He tried so hard to save everyone, he even came after I told him not to. I was so mad then but he was only worried about me. There's nothing that he did that was wrong at all."

"Yet his actions were what caused the attack."

"But he was trying to help an old woman. How is that bad? He was trying to help the people in front of him and he just--he got punished for it. It's not fair."

"No, it's not," Kratos said, satisfied that she had given up hiding anything from him. He knew that any thought of Lloyd could worry her. "The world is rarely fair."

"No it's not--well, it's not always unfair. But I hate how Lloyd had to learn about the unfairness when he's just seventeen. He's too young for any of this."

"It's a shame that he has to be on the Journey of Regeneration."

"At least it doesn't have to be for long. I want to take him to Luin, Genis said he wanted to come too."

"A fine idea," Kratos said as he smiled at her. "I know that you would love to see that city again. Perhaps after we release the Fire Seal we can go to Luin."

"You're willing to let me go so soon? We could go to Palmacosta. You'd like that better, right?"

Kratos shook his head yet was pleased that she was still concerned for him. "What I want is for you and Lloyd to be happy. The shorter he travels on the Journey of Regeneration, the less he has to learn of the world."

"That would be better for Lloyd," Anna said as she smiled before she moved her head to be against his chest again. "We should make the most of this time, don't you think?"

"Yes," Kratos said before he took his hand and grasped the chain about his neck. He raised the locket above his head and began to put it about Anna's head.

"Hey, what are you doing?" she asked but she did not move from her position.

"This is yours."

"But I gave it to you--"

"Only because you and Lloyd were going to be away from me. You're both here now, so I want you to have it."

"Okay, fine," Anna said and Kratos continued to put it about her neck. "But you're getting it back once we get to Luin."

"You could always keep it."

"I want you to have it."

"Very well," Kratos said reluctantly, and he knew that Anna would not forget. It made what he was going to give her later all the more important. Anna did not respond and he felt her breathing become slower against his chest. "Anna? Are you awake?"

"Mm?" she said as she slowly rose her head to meet his eyes. Her features were shaped in exhaustion. "I'm awake, I'm awake."

"Perhaps we should return to the inn," Kratos said as he smiled at her.

"Okay," Anna agreed and she began to rise, but Kratos kept his grasp firm on her. "What are you--ah!"

Kratos easily rose from where he sat with her in his arms and he smiled as he heard her uncontrollable laughter. He could still make her smile, and no matter the underlying reasons behind it he would take advantage of it. Despite what had bothered Anna and how she had come back into his life so unrepentantly, he knew that he would enjoy every moment that they had together. This was borrowed time, and he would appreciate it. These were memories of her that they would create and he knew that he would cherish much later in his life.


	13. Secrets

_A/N: Happy 2010! Later on in the story, the Qing (pronounced Ching) dynasty is mentioned, it's a actually based from an ancient Chinese royal dynasty by the same name. It's because of them the Qing dynasty we call China, China. Apologies for the late update, I've been feeling rather silly lately._

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_Secrets_

Sunlight spilled through the inn window's wooden arches and onto the throw rug upon the worn oaken floor. Anna stared at that golden rectangle of light unblinkingly, before she shifted her eyes to the off-white wall beside the window to see the same shaped rectangle take form, except in the colour of a mixture of purple and blue. She blinked several times watching it slowly fade away then vanish as her normal vision returned. That old trick was something she had done many times as a child and probably wasn't good for her eyes, but she didn't care. It was better to take her mind off of things she had no wish to think of, at least for a few moments.

"…Anna?" came a familiar baritone voice sent her from the solace of her mind with a jolt.

"Yes?" her eyes darted away from the window and towards Kratos who had opted to stand upon the wooden oak floors. "Uh, what is it?"

"I wanted to know if you had any input into our plans for Lloyd's education."

"You know that I don't. Whatever you two decide will be fine with me."

"So your son's education isn't important enough for you to listen to, is it?" Raine said through a disapproving voice.

"Of course it's important," she began as she turned about far too quickly to face Raine so that her muscles ached in protest and she winced. Her vision now fully encompassed Raine who was sitting on a chair beside the sole desk in the room. "I just have no idea what to say when it comes to things like this."

Raine's eyebrows were raised slightly in disbelief as she remained silent and Anna sighed as the articulation of her words sunk in.

"Look, I know how that sounds, but--"

"She might not want to say it, but she has no experience teaching and wouldn't know where to start to help us form any lesson plans," Kratos interrupted her but Anna sighed in relief as she attempted to quickly recollect herself for any future form of conversation. "I may also remind you that she has pushed herself when she was captured by the Desians, her mind isn't working as it should."

"And just what is that supposed to mean?" Anna turned her gaze to Kratos, who was looking at her through amused eyes. "That my mind isn't working right?"

"Yes, exactly," Kratos said as a small smile appeared on his lips.

"You see what I have to put up with? Insults everywhere," Anna said, moving her gaze to Raine. "Take it from me, Raine, never get married. Men aren't worth the trouble."

"I'll try to keep that in mind," Raine said, while giving her a hesitant smile. _Probably not used to this fast a switch in conversation_, Anna concluded absently. _Kratos really is good at veering conversations to his liking._

"You shouldn't pretend as if you're the only one that receives insults. I believe I've just received one."

"Oh?" Anna turned to him as she feigned ignorance. "And what was that insult again? I seem to have forgotten."

Kratos chuckled as he shook his head, sending his ill-kempt hair from side to side. "You're brain isn't so addled that you've forgotten what you've said seconds ago."

"Oh, I don't know about that. With the way you put it, my mind is broken already. I have no idea what you're talking about."

"So you remember what I said about your brain but not what you said--"

"Okay, okay, I give up. I remember just fine, but I can't just let you have all the insults, I gotta defend myself."

"Is that so?" Kratos asked, but his features lightened further. "Would that not create a circle of insults that never ends?"

"Probably. But you started it."

"Did I? And why is that?"

"Because I said so."

"Compelling logic."

"Truer words were never spoken," Anna said and he chuckled. Good. It was good to hear him laugh and see his smile and to see him happy. All she knew of him now was that she wanted to make sure that these last few weeks with him would be something that he would enjoy. Anything else, well that didn't matter, did it? His eyes were still alit in humour, but he walked towards the window and peered out it, before looking back to her.

"It's about four'o'clock, judging from where the sun is in the sky. Perhaps I should check up on the children," Kratos suggested as his movements stilled. "It wouldn't hurt to make sure they're keeping out of trouble, they have been left to wander on their own since they ate lunch."

"Sounds good to me," Anna said as she stifled a yawn and suddenly became very aware of her aching limbs again. "I'd come with you but I think it'd be better if I avoided the sun for today."

"Of course," Kratos said as he walked towards her in quick movements and leaned down so that she could feel his breath against her cheek. His lips were warm against her cheek as they gently pressed against it, then glided against her skin and made their way to her lips. Their movements were tender and slow against hers and Anna made sure to reciprocate the efforts. He quickly drew away before she could continue, and she was left with confusion.

"Uh, what was that exactly?" Anna asked him as he straightened his stance.

"A goodbye kiss."

"Since when do you give goodbye kisses?"

"I thought it might be a good time to start."

She laughed, she couldn't help it, this was so impulsive and so unlike the Kratos she knew.

"Is there something amusing about that?" Kratos tilted his head to the side.

"Oh no, no, it's nothing at all. You know, you should probably get going before the kids get in trouble."

"So you're not going to answer me?"

"Afraid not."

"I'm asking you later," his face was etched in mock seriousness and Anna's smile widened at that. "I trust you'll cooperate."

"And if I refuse?"

"You'll learn to regret it," a hint of smile crept into his voice which betrayed his words.

"Is that a threat?"

"Naturally," Kratos said with a smile gracing his lips as he cast her a lingering gaze before he turned to the door and disappeared behind it.

Anna chanced a glance at Raine and noticed that she was intently absorbed in a book, probably became interested in it while she and Kratos were talking. _I shouldn't bug her, I really shouldn't bug her_. A silence then settled between them and Anna suddenly became very aware that she had not spoken to another woman for an extended period of time for--oh, how long was it? She couldn't even remember. Anna sighed as she rose her legs out in front of her to stretch them while putting her hands behind her back which dug into the bed sheets since they supported her weight. An idea suddenly struck her as to Kratos' abrupt departure. It was so like him to do this. If his bright idea was to leave them alone so they could forge some sort of friendship it clearly wasn't working.

She shifted her legs so that they could be curled on the bed beside her torso and she bit her lip as the events of the previous night played through her mind. His lips and his warmth and his kind and worried words. He was--no, she wouldn't think of how she felt about him anymore. She would just take it in the moment since it seemed the moment was all she would have for some time. Oh, but would he expect her to continue his lessons with Lloyd after he was gone? Her stomach plummeted. Goddess, she knew he did. That--

"Anna?"

"Yes?" Anna left her thoughts with a jolt, yet turned her gaze to Raine. She wore a mask, similar to Kratos' and somehow something inside of her told her that something was not right.

"There's been something that I've been meaning to ask you, if you don't mind."

"Oh?" this perked Anna's curiosity, and she moved her legs to dangle from the bed's edge and straightened her back. "Go ahead, what is it?"

"It's something that my brother told me about once he returned from the Desian Base. I trust you know what I'm talking about."

Anna wracked her brain for anything that happened that would bring this up. "No, I don't think that I do."

"You don't?" unguarded surprise laced her voice.

"Oh, wait, that's _right_," a revelation suddenly turned inside herself. "I remember now, they let him go because he was a half-elf. That's what you mean, isn't it?"

"So you know," Raine's eyes widened and it looked as if she was mentally preparing herself for something, probably something that would involve a slew of racial slurs. Instant understanding clicked in her brain.

"Don't worry, don't worry at all," she drew her hands up from behind her to be in front of her as some kind of peace offering. "I'm not going to tell anyone about you and Genis. I know how humans can be about this and I for one happen to not care if you two are half-elves."

"You _what_?" Raine's voice was laced in confusion and shock and her brows furrowed, as if attempting to make sense of Anna's attitude. Not like Anna could blame her. "But--the Desians are a half-elf organization. You should despise us."

"But I don't, it's not like it's your fault that there Desians here. I honestly don't care."

"How could you of all people simply not care?"

"But I don't. Okay, maybe I should explain myself. I bet you've faced a lot of prejudice in your day," Raine nodded, traces of shock still reminiscent on her features. Anna took a deep breath, attempting to collect her thoughts in a coherent form before continuing on. This situation was a delicate one and this could quite possible be the worst time for this to be broached, considering her exhaustion.

"Look, just because half-elves happen to run the organization that I hate, that doesn't mean that I hate all half-elves. No one should be treated unequally just because of something that they can't change, that's not right at all. It'd make me no better then them, judging humans just because of how they were born. Wouldn't that be stupid to blame them all when it was a few of them that hurt me? There are good half-elves too, I mean, just look at you and Genis. Genis seems like a good kid and you've been a good influence on Lloyd for all those years. None of that changes just because of your species, I happen to be grateful that you were able to act as a female authoritative figure for Lloyd," Anna brought a hand to her forehead to brush away stray hairs. "I'm not sure that I said all that right, you could probably ask me in a few days to get a better response, but that's not the point. The point is that I think it's unfair how half-elves are treated and I really don't care if you happen to be one."

"No, I think I understand," Raine said, collecting the information. "I must say, I've never heard anyone say this before. Every time my brother and I were known as half-elves we weren't accepted, so to speak. It's only when we pretended to be elves that we were treated normally."

"I'm so sorry to hear that," Anna said, feeling pity and compassion towards this woman that she barely knew. "It must have been so hard for you, especially with a little brother to raise."

"Yes, it was…difficult," Raine said, with an unreadable expression lying beneath her eyes. "Thank you."

"You're welcome," Anna said as she smiled, feeling such sympathy for Raine to run through her. It must've taken such strength to get through what she had, and respect for her rose in Anna's mind. She looked on the table and read the spine of the book. A change of topic from this one would be a good idea. "You're interested in the Qing dynasty?"

"Of course I am! That period is so fascinating--" her face then turned to suspicion. "How would a mercenary know about ancient history?"

"Just because I'm a mercenary doesn't mean that I'm stupid. When I got out of that Desian prison so long ago I wanted to learn as much about the world that I missed out on for so long as I could."

Raine smiled. "That does make sense. Are you aware of the temples that the Qing helped to create?"

"You mean like in the forbidden city?"

"No, that's just scratching the surface. One emperor was responsible for building many temples in a particular style open to the public."

"That so? How interesting, which one?" Anna asked and smiled at the excited look on Raine's face. "I'd love to hear about it."

The fire crackled underneath the stars and Anna felt conflict course through her as she sat on the ground, staring into the dancing flames. Colette had received the first rite as the Chosen, and when she saw the girl gain her wings she wanted to do something, anything, for that poor girl. But she couldn't, and with that she felt as if she was allowing everything she hated to just be. _Something else to actually see this stuff happen,_ Anna thought as she bit her lip. _Just thinking about it makes me feel so removed from it. It's so…unsettling._

"Hey, mom," Lloyd said as he walked over to her and sat beside her on the grass. "How're you doing?"

"Oh, not too bad all things considered."

"You sure about that? You look kinda out of it."

"Do I?" Anna was surprised and took time to collect herself. As if she could tell her own son what was actually troubling her, an excuse easily flew to her mind. "Well it has been a pretty long day. That Fire Temple wasn't exactly as simple as Martel Temple."

"Yeah I know, right? That puzzle was so confusing."

"All you had to do was shoot fire from that ring of yours into those spots," Anna said feeling amusement. It was just like Lloyd to say that. "Not exactly hard."

"Well it was hard to me. I was trying to figure it out but everyone else seemed to be two steps ahead--wait. If you didn't think it was hard then why are you like this?"

"It was more because of fighting the monsters then anything. Don't worry about it, sweetie, I think I just need to relax. I'll be fine by tomorrow."

"You're not this tired 'cause of before, right?" Lloyd said, and Anna knew immediately what he was talking about. "We can always take it slower if you're still hurting, I mean, you're the one that wanted to leave only after a day's rest."

"Oh, no, there's no need for that. I think a good night's sleep is all I need to get better. Thanks for worrying about me, Lloyd," Anna said as she smiled and squeezed his arm. "Means a lot to me, you know? Love you."

"Love you too," Lloyd said and he returned her smile with one of his own. There was no way she wouldn't keep that one promise to him, especially if it means so much to him. _Well, it means a lot to me too, _she mused to herself before she then heard footsteps, and from her peripheral vision saw Kratos sit in between them both. He wasn't spying on them, was he? She perished the thought as quickly as it came.

"Hey, dad. How's it going?"

"Good," Kratos said and Anna felt his arm go about her shoulders. She stiffened, her thoughts turning to Colette who was walking away from their camp and alone, most likely in pain. "And what about you two?"

"Oh, I'm fine but mom's feeling tired."

"Is that so?" Kratos' voice was concerned, Anna could tell, and for some unknown reason she hated it. Colette was the one that needed his concern, not her. "Are you still exhausted from--"

"No, I'm fine. I just need some rest, that's all," she said with an even tone as she firmly kept her gaze fixed to the fire.

"You don't sound fine," she could practically feel the concern radiate from him, but she didn't care. She should but she couldn't.

"Yeah, you're right. Mom, you sure you don't want to turn in early or something?"

"Your muscles are tense," Kratos said as he placed each hand on her shoulders, and she could feel the fingers trying to knead her muscles. She shuddered. "Perhaps, if--"

"Uh, you know what, I think what I need is some time alone with my thoughts," Anna said with a small smile as she abruptly rose, shrugging off Kratos' hands without finesse. "It has been a long day."

"Guess that makes sense." Lloyd said.

"Anna?" Kratos said and Anna whirled around to face him and his unreadable eyes. "I know that you said you wanted time alone, but would you allow me to accompany you?"

Anna stared at him for a time and she knew that she should say yes but all she could think about was that little girl that was going through so much and all because of _him_, and no matter how illogical the feeling was she couldn't shake it. She couldn't be with him, she just couldn't. Not now.

"_No_," she finally said and she did nothing to mask the revulsion she was feeling in the pit of her stomach. His features were etched in a mixture of shock and a myriad of other emotions she didn't care to identify before his mask came up. _Good_, she thought to herself and although she knew she shouldn't be thinking like that she didn't care. She turned around and met the forest as she walked towards it. To hell with making him feel better about this all. Why should she care about him now of all times when that poor girl suffering out there all alone with no one to help her or to talk to about it. The sounds of conversation by the fireside hummed in the back of her head before she could fully be out of earshot.

"Lloyd? Can I have a moment?"

"Sure, dad. Hey, what's all that you have there? And what's with those rocks?"

"It's part of what I'd like to talk to you about. It's very important that you keep it from…"

The voices from the camp were soon lost to her as she went through the meagre forest around the small oasis. She had to talk to Colette and at least offer what little comfort she could. She did not deserve the hand that fate had dealt her, and although it was not within Anna's power to turn the wheel of fate she could at least try to make sure that she wasn't alone. The oasis came into her vision and she saw the girl standing beside it, her blonde hair blowing in the gentle wind and her eyes retained a melancholy that she did not show to any others. Anna's heart stopped. She knew exactly what it was like to be in pain and suffer all alone. It was not something that she would wish on anyone.

"Hello, Colette," Anna said softly as she joined her by her side, and Colette's eyes widened in surprise, but she quickly masked the lingering traces of sadness in her features with a smile.

"Oh, Anna, hi, it's nice to see you again," Colette said, but Anna knew there was more going through this girl's head then she was going to admit. "What brings you here?"

"I was just going on a walk to clear my head, actually. I'm glad I caught you, though, we haven't gotten much of a chance to talk now, have we?"

"We kind of had. You know, like when I gave you the water."

"I remember that," Anna gave her a small smile and shifted her weight from foot to foot. "But that wasn't that long a conversation, was it? I have to say I'm kind of worried about you, especially since you're all alone now."

"Oh, don't be worried about me, I'm just fine," her smile widened and Anna wondered more and more what was actually going through her mind. "I know you're worried, but it's alright, I'll be perfectly fine."

"Are you sure? I just want to make sure you're okay. I mean, you've been one of Lloyd's best friends for such a long time, and you seem like such a sweet young girl."

"Really? I am?" her voice sounded hopeful, and her smile grew and Anna suspected it was a real one as it met her eyes. "Thank you so much."

Anna laughed lightly. "You're welcome but I don't know why you're thanking me. I should be the one thanking you for helping taking care of Lloyd was I was gone."

"Oh, I didn't take care of him. We're friends."

"I know, but that's what's important. It's good to know he had such good friends to be around when I wasn't there for him. You've definitely been a good influence on him," Anna said and Colette was positively beaming at her, what with her eyes that crinkled and the dimples on her cheeks. _How cute…_ she thought to herself as she returned the smile. "Now are you alright? You're not still in pain, are you?"

"Oh, no, I'm perfectly fine. Don't worry about me, I'm the Chosen, right? It's what I'm supposed to do."

"You can't be okay just because you're the Chosen. It's because you're the Chosen that you have to go through so much pain. I don't even want to think about what you're going to have to go through when you release the rest of the seals, this can't be easy for you," Colette's smile wavered, and Anna continued on. "I just came since I wanted to tell you that you don't have to go through this alone. I'm here, and so are so many people that care about you."

"You mean you came all this way for me?" her voice was very small.

"Yes, I did. You had me worried, you know?" Anna said while placing her hands on Colette's shoulders and winked. "Don't tell anyone that, though, they think I went on a walk to clear my head."

" 'Kay, I can do that. I--I guess this whole angel transformation has it's downside. I mean, it does hurt," Colette said, and without thinking Anna wrapped her arms about her teenaged body. "Please don't tell Lloyd about how much I hurt."

"Don't worry, Colette, your secret's safe with me," Anna said, while she brought a hand to her hair, moving it up and down and she felt the girl's arms loosely wrap about her.

"Thanks. Hugs are so nice," Colette said and Anna laughed.

"Hugs are nice, aren't they? Something about them that always makes me feel better."

"Mmhmm, me too, I think."

There was a slight inward satisfaction inside of her at comforting Colette. Now she wasn't spending her night at releasing the first seal alone, in the cold and dark at night. If the only thing she could do was right was to comfort her here and now then she would do it. She tightened her hold on the girl, she hated the idea of her dying for such a stupid and futile cause. _No, don't think about that. You can't do anything about it, you can't save everyone you come across, _she whispered harshly to herself in her mind. _Stop thinking about it. _But she couldn't.

"Um, Anna?"

"Yes?"

"Maybe we should get back to the camp now?"

"You know, you're right," Anna said as she gave her a final squeeze before she let her go, and gave her a smile. "We can't leave those boys alone in the camp with just Raine to keep them from ruining everything. Imagine what they'd do."

"But I know they wouldn't do anything--"

Anna laughed. "I was just kidding, Colette."

"You were? Sorry, I couldn't tell," they both began slowly walking upon the non-existent path back to camp. "But, um, I guess you're right. We should make sure those boys don't make everything messy. Think about what they could do with Kratos' rock collection."

"Rock collection?" Anna tilted her head to her side, confused.

"Oh, um, that's nothing, nothing at all," her eyes were panicked, and her hands flew in front of her moving defensively. "I was kidding too."

Anna smiled. "Okay then. I'm just not used to hearing you joke around, that's all."

"Oh, but I do joke around, I do it lots. Kind of hard not to with Lloyd around. You'll see."

"I'm sure I will," she said, and then they continued their walk with amicable banter between the two of them and Anna felt herself come to like Colette more and more. Yes, it was definitely a good thing that she and Lloyd had been friends for so many years. A sadness crept inside of her heart at the thoughts of everything the Chosen would have to endure. She knew getting attached to Colette would inevitably hurt her, but she didn't care. She refused to shut down her emotions and she didn't care if it was a mistake. It was hers to make.


	14. Misreckoning

_A/N: Hey guys! Sorry it__'s been such a ridiculously long time since the last update, but I suppose I've been focusing a bit too much on other things and not enough on my writing. Personal problems suck, no? Anyway, I've got the next 10 chapters or so planned down to each event that's going to take place in them. My brain's been working on the story, even if my pen has not. Alas, enough with me. Onwards!_

_Disclaimer: I own nothing._

_

* * *

_

_Misreckoning_

_Will this stupid cave ever end?_ Sheena thought as brought her hand to a sweaty clump of hair from her forehead and pushed it behind her ear. Her whole body was aching from the fall but she had to keep going, past the rock and rubble of the uneven cavern floor. This cave was just plain creepy what with the scarcity of light and the strange noises that she could not identify. _Could this thing collapse in on itself? _That thought sent chills through her body and made her push her aching legs faster, watching the shadows and the crevices of the wall blur together. _Please don't, please don't, _she chanted to herself as she tried to ignore how her whole body ached. _Wouldn't it just be easier if I rested for a little bit--_ _No, don't think like that. I can't do that. I can't let anyone down, even if it hurts_. _I have to keep--whoa! _The rocky cavern wall met her feet, and she grimaced. Ugh, there's no time for this. She turned right and something pleasant met her eyes.

There was light. Finally! Her eyes squinted, but it did nothing to slow her movements. As her eyes became used to it, she could tell that it was streaming through wooden boards of what looked like a flimsy attempt to stop anyone from coming into this damned place. Hope of finally leaving the place surged through her with adrenaline and she ran up to the wooden barrier, ignoring the aches in her body, and brought her leg up in a kick. It creaked, and she did so again and again. _Thud. _It sent up dry dirt from the ground swirling around the wood, and the sudden brightness of the sun made her squint, but shadow of people caught her eye and her eyes widened which brought them into focus. It was the Chosen's group. Goddess, yes.

"W--wait!" Sheena called walking quicker, towards them with a hand to her cards. She was not going to let them escape.

"Wow, she caught up with us," said the boy dressed in red. He was kind of cute--no, no gawking at the enemy.

"Oh, thank goodness!" The Chosen said and Sheena was inwardly confused. Why would she care that she was okay? No, no time for wondering. She couldn't afford to think of the Chosen as a person now.

"D--don't move!" Sheena said, bringing her cards and prepared herself for battle like she had practiced so many times before.

"A wise decision," came the voice of a woman that Sheena saw in her peripheral vision. Ugh, how could she sound so--so calm?

"I won't be caught off guard this time! Pre--"

"Wait. You don`t have to do that," another woman interrupted her and walked towards her slowly, with her hands with their palms facing outwards in a sort of peace offering. Sheena's eyes narrowed and she made sure to keep track of everyone in their little party. Was this some sort of trick?

"Mom, what're you--"

"We don`t need to fight," the woman said without taking her eyes off of Sheena. "Don't you think you should be talking first before we start fighting?"

"There's nothing to talk about, there's only one way this can go down. The Chosen of Mana needs to die and you guys don't want her to."

"But she's the one that's going to regenerate the world," her voice sounded genuinely shocked. "Why would you want to stop that?"

"'Cause that's the problem in the first place."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that--well, that doesn't matter," she said as she eyed each in the group suspiciously. She was so close to saving everyone, and she was _not_ going to let a smooth talking lady to get in the way of that. In a quick movement she brought the cards from her side in front of her, with her grandfather's card in her left. "Talking's not gonna change anything."

"Whoa, hold up a second there. Talking can change things, if we just understood one another then maybe--"

"Sh--shut up, just shut up!" Sheena said, ignoring what she was saying that in the back of her head she thought she may listen to. Images of her village flashed through her mind. Everyone was counting on her, she couldn't do this. "Nothin's gonna change what I've gotta do."

In mere moments Sheena felt magic run through her as she held up her Grandfather's card and she summoned the Guardian to her world. A simple movement of her head conveyed where she wanted it to go, and it complied. _If it keeps that big muscled guy busy, I think I could have a chance at, _she thought as she mentally prepared herself for the onslaught of battle. The Chosen, she was on the ground. Her eyes narrowed and her heart pounded as she pushed her legs with cards raised. _Clash. _She grimaced, and felt her feet dig into the dirt below her as she was face to face with the woman that had talked to her, with a sword against her card.

"We don't have to do this, you know," the woman said and Sheena felt the tightened muscles in her arms burn in pain as the woman's sword intensified. "There's still--"

Energy flooded through her in a burst and cards flew in a sphere to knock the woman off her feet and away from her. The Chosen was staring at her, dumbstruck and Sheena gritted her teeth as she ran while mentally preparing an attack to end this quickly. Pain struck her side and her eyes widened. Instinct took over and she brought her card up in defence but used the momentum to spin and sent her cards out for retribution to the boy that she knew attacked her. She struck him, she knew, since his movements were slowed and she ran at him. This was her chance.

Steel struck her arm, and she winced as she looked at that damned woman again, panting just as hard as Sheena was but with blood trickling down her cheek and forehead. Her card was brought up before she could register that the sword was coming for a rebound strike.

"Colette, leave her to us. Go attack whatever thing is over there with the others," the woman said, and Sheena grunted in irritation.

"R--right," the Chosen said but she was _not_ getting away this time. The boy came from behind her, and Sheena waited, with her card against the woman's sword, until the last second to move and slashed his unprotected arm. Run, she had to run to that girl--she narrowly escaped the sword that grazed her shoulder and as she looked up, her Guardian was almost gone, with some silver-haired kid setting it on fire. Her eyes widened.

_No. _

She wasn't going to lose, was she? But she couldn't! Everyone was depending on her. She veered out of the way of yet another sword by that kid and she sent her cards flying which knocked both of them on the ground. She ran from them, and took in the situation as she panted for breath and felt the pounding of her heart against her ribcage.

The Guardian was gone. It was really gone. There was no way she could take all of them on at once, and boy did they look pissed. Green wind came at her so fast that she flew off her feet. Thud. She was winded and struggled for breath among the dirt and the bramble and the leaves. It was official, she was screwed.

Despite the protest of every muscle in her body she got to her feet, and she held the arm that was wounded with her good one, feeling oh so distinctly the searing pain that must've gotten worse from the dirt and whatever else had gotten in it. The big guy was coming at her and she raised her cards with her good hand. She was not going down without a fight. A woman said something, but her mind just wasn't going to focus on that this time around but whatever was said the man's movements stilled. Hope surged through her at the thought of escape, and she quickly rummaged through her robe to find the smoke ball.

"Ugh…Just you wait," Sheena said through her breaths, trying to muster up as much confidence as she could. "I swear I will kill you all next time!"

Her hand was trembling since she clutched the smoke ball so tightly and she vaguely heard voices of protest before she threw it to the ground and disappeared through the mist.

* * *

"Hold still," Kratos said as he held his hands above Anna's wounded arm. "This won't take long."

"Sure thing," Anna said. He pushed all thoughts out of his mind save that of healing the wound. He did as he had so many times before and envisioned what needed to be done as he felt the mana flow through him and seep out towards the wound. It was not as bad as it looked, he knew since it took little time for the blood to dissipate. Soon the wound was but a memory, and he brought his hands to his side, nodding approvingly at his work.

"Better?"

"Much," Anna said as she turned to him and moved her arm in a circular motion. "Thanks, honey."

"Honey?" He felt a mix of confusion and amusement flow through him.

"Oh? Should I not call you that, sweet pea?"

He chuckled. "You were never one for pet names."

"A pet name?" She uttered a fake gasp and brought a hand to her mouth. "Are you calling yourself a pet?"

His smile widened. "Not at all, dear."

"Dear?"

"Now you know how I feel. Isn't it odd to hear someone call you something like that?"

"Ooh, okay," she said with a smile and a wink. "Then--"

"Wait a second, mom," Lloyd said, bringing attention to how close he was to both of them. "Don't you call me sweetie?"

"Yep, I do all the time. What does this have to do with anything?"

"But it does. That's a pet name, right?"

"That's right."

"But if you don't do it for dad then--"

"Sweetie," Anna said in an attempt at a sing-song voice as she walked up to him and brought a hand to ruffle his hair. "It's 'cause I love you so much that I call you it."

"R--really?" Lloyd sounded pretty happy and Kratos smiled. It was so good seeing them get along.

"Yes, really."

"W--well, that's awesome."

Lloyd had a big grin on his face, and Genis walked to him and muttered something that was only meant for him, but Kratos heard the words "Mama's boy" pass his breath. Kratos smiled.

"I am not!"

"You're not what, Lloyd?" Anna said with her head tilted with a smile. Good, she had heard what he said too. It meant she was taking their promise seriously and she would be on guard in her angelic form.

"W--well, I--I'm not, uh, sure that if everyone's alright. Yeah, that's it."

"Everyone looks okay to me, Lloyd. I think Professor Sage and Kratos healed everybody up really good," Colette said. "Shall we keep going then?"

"Yes, that's right," came Raine's voice. "We should get going before we lose any more daylight."

"I agree." Kratos said. "It's best to get off of this trail, it's not advantageous if anything were to attack us."

"Yeah, no kidding, especially after what just happened," Anna murmured with a troubled look that remained on her face before she gave him a small smile as she walked past him. He felt her arm brush past his own.

_ What could Anna be worried about? _Kratos thought as he moved to follow suit with the others along the winding, dirt path. He knew that she was worried about Colette after they had released the Fire Seal, that much was clear to him especially considering how she had acted. His brow furrowed as he kept in time, and made sure to keep note of anything unusual of his surroundings, hearing the idle banter some of his companions decided to partake in in the back of his mind. She didn't think that he enjoyed any of this, did she? That thought sent chills through him, he had no desire for his wife to think of him in such a manner. If only he could explain himself to her and ease whatever fears she may have of her but he could not do that if he had no chance to speak to her. She seemed to make any excuse to avoid the topic altogether when they were walking side by side.

"There something wrong?" Anna's voice brought his attention to her. She was talking to Colette of course, she was keeping pace beside her.

"Oh, it's nothing."

"It's not nothing."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. I just really hope that the girl's okay. She looked so hurt when she escaped, I would just hate it if she didn't get any treatment for those wounds."

"Are you kidding me?" Lloyd said with reasonable surprise. Kratos felt it as well.

"I am not, I'm really worried about her."

"But why? She just tried to kill you and all of us along with her."

"I know, but there must be a really good reason that she wanted to do it. I'm sure if we got the chance to talk that she'd understand that she was mistaken."

"But she did have a chance to talk," Genis said. "Lloyd's mom tried talking to her, remember?"

"I know, but I'm sure there's a good reason for it. I'll have to ask her about it when we become friends."

"Friends?" Genis' voice was more incredulous then before. "Something tells me that friends don't first meet each other trying to kill each other."

"Yeah, but not all friendships have to start out all normal. I'm sure we'll work something out."

"Do you really think that you two could be friends?" Anna asked quietly.

"Uh-huh, of course we can. Anyone can be friends, you just have to be persistent is all."

"I hope you're right," Anna said. "It'd be nice if enemies didn't have to kill each other."

"Mom, not you too."

"What?"

"You think that--"

"That's so pretty," Colette exclaimed as she moved to the side of the trail where the vegetation grew.

"What is, Colette?" Anna asked as she stopped beside her, and soon the others joined her.

"That," Colette pointed. Kratos was curious and moved so he could catch a glimpse of the strange flower that had so captured her interest. It was nestled between various plants that Kratos never bothered to know the name of and had six pointed petals, of an odd shade of purple. Unusual to be sure.

"Oh, that's a trillium. Those are pretty rare."

"They are?"

"Yeah, you've got a good eye to find one in all this ."

"Thanks!"

"Well if you like it so much," Lloyd said, who was now beside Colette. "Why don't we pick it and press it between some of Professor Sage's books?"

"And when did I offer my books for such a thing?" Raine said.

"It's no big deal--"

"I don't think it'd be good to pick it," Anna said. "These flowers are very rare, it'd help bring their extinction if you picked it right now."

"But Colette really likes it. Besides, it's just one flower."

"Yeah, but one's enough. There's probably another trillium around here that could breed with it, there's always a need for more rare flowers like this."

"That's such a good idea!" Colette exclaimed bringing her hands in front of her and turned towards Anna with sparkling eyes. Kratos smiled. "These flowers shouldn't be rare anymore, they should be everywhere."

Anna laughed. "Yeah, and if that's going to happen we can't go off pressing these flowers."

"Ah, man. I didn't mean it like that."

"Don't worry about it Lloyd, you didn't know."

"Yeah, but still…"

"We should continue on," Raine said and the others murmured their agreement as they began to walk down the dirt trodden path that was surrounded by foliage yet again.

"Lloyd," Kratos said.

"Yeah, dad?" Lloyd said as he matched his steps with his, slightly behind the others.

Kratos lowered his voice. "Picking a flower is not the only way you can give it to someone."

"It isn't? There's another way?"

"Yes, there is. I'll tell you but I have another favour to ask."

* * *

Anna stretched her legs out in front of her on the dirt and grass as she brought Raine's book closer to her face and tried to read a page yet again. What was this, the third time she tried? The fourth? She sighed, and tried again. This was actually interesting, the Qing dynasty had--the girl flew to her mind, with her face drenched in sweat and her dark hair swinging behind her. _This isn't going to sink in. Just face it, that girl just isn't going to get out of my mind. _She sighed as she snapped the book shut, feeling the short gust of wind against her face before she lowered the book and let the weight of it rest on her lap. The title of the book shone in the light of the fire. _And Raine leant me this book for my half of the night shift too. Fantastic._

Anna brought her hands behind her, letting them dig into the dirt and grass as they carried the weight of her torso. That girl, just who was she? Could she be a Renegade or Desian? No, that made no sense at all, especially considering that those two organizations always had their members run in groups and wear those silly looking uniforms. Her gaze shifted towards the dancing flames that kept her and her sleeping companions warm from the cold of the night. Somehow the fire reminded her of that girl and that determination that was set beneath those brown eyes that were so unwilling to listen to reason.

Why would she even want to kill Colette in the first place? Colette couldn't make an enemy even if she tried, that girl was too sweet for that. The assassin could still be with the Renegades if they tried a solo tactic to catch them off-guard--the girl's face flashed through her mind. There were no elven features, at least any obvious ones that Anna would be able to tell. A human working with the Renegades was unlikely but a human working with the Desians? She stifled a laugh. That was absurd. The Desians were far too racist to even think of using a human assassin.

The only thing that she was sure of was that the girl was yet another person caught up in these lies, doing it for some hollow cause or another. She bit her bottom lip and a bad feeling erupted from the bottom of her stomach. That girl wasn't going to let up and that was going to get her killed, she was almost certain of it. She bit her lip harder and felt pain but she didn't care. And what about Colette? It was basically assured that she was going to die. She tasted blood. Damn. Was she really biting down that hard? She brought a finger to her lip and felt the sting of pain before she drew back to see the redness that trickled down her finger. What--

"Good evening," came Kratos' familiar voice, and Anna shot her gaze to where the voice came from, feeling her heart pound in surprise. Just like him to sneak up on her.

"Oh, hello."

"How are you?" Kratos asked as he moved to sit beside her. She gave him a small smile.

"Alright I guess--"

"No you're not. Your lip," Kratos said as he brought a hand to it.

"What about it?" She asked. He brought a finger to it she felt a shooting pain. "Ow! Oh right, I guess I forgot about that. It's nothing really, I was just being stupid."

"I highly doubt that could happen," Kratos said as he brought his other hand to her face, with his warm fingers trailing her chin to brush her chin, and she knew that he was brushing off the blood there.

"Last time I checked biting your lip until it bled was something really stupid to do."

"Not necessarily," Kratos said as he moved both his hands to hold her jaw. "I wouldn't call it stupid if someone bite their lip for a reason."

He looked into his brown eyes, soft with concern and she felt a pang of guilt as the warmth of his hands heated her face. He was really worried, wasn't he?

"Yeah, I guess you're right," Anna said and as she talked she tasted blood on her tongue. "And there was a reason that it happened."

"Oh?" His voice showed interest, and his eyebrows rose slightly in the way that they always did when he truly wanted to know something but was trying to hide it. She knew that was exactly what he was getting at, but he thought it best to use tact around what he needed to know instead of just acting outright. Is that because of last night? She didn't need to ask, she knew it was.

"I don't mind telling you but, uh, first do you mind healing my lip?" she asked. She moved her head to lean into his hands and gave him a smile that she hoped was comforting. Well, probably not since her lip was bleeding--an idea than struck her. She brought her lips to part from her teeth to try to give a bloody grin. "It is quite the distraction, wouldn't you say?"

Kratos chuckled and shook his head. "Well, if you put it that way it seems I have no choice but to comply. I wouldn't want to see that again."

"Hey," Anna said in feigned offence.

"Hold still," he said as he brought a hand to hover inches above her lips, and a resolve came to his eyes that happened whenever he wanted to cast a spell.

"No problem."

"You're not being still," he said with a hint of smile.

"Well you don't have to be so technical about it."

"I suppose not," he said before his eyes went from that of amusement to that of concentration and soon Anna felt the warmth that the mana brought to her lip as it healed it, and just as quickly as it had come it was gone.

"Thanks," Anna said. "'Appreciate it."

"As you should."

"You sound so smug."

"Do I?" He said with a smile that soon fell and his gaze drew to the fire in front of them. He let both hands fall from her jaw line, but she felt one warm hand on top of her own.

"What's the matter?"

"I should be the one asking you that."

Anna knew exactly what he was referring to. "Not so sure that you should. You do have the second half of the night shift, you should be sleeping right now so you don't die tomorrow."

"I'll survive," he said dryly.

"Yeah, I know you will if you're going to do what I think you'll do. You don't have to, you know, you can just sleep now."

He shook his head. "I wouldn't be able to if I tried. There's something that's been on my mind that's allowed sleep to elude me."

"What's on your mind?"

"You," Kratos said and turned his head to look at her, with those eyes that held so much worry and care and she felt his hand squeeze her own. Anna looked into those brown eyes that were so sincere and so loving that she knew she couldn't avoid the topic any longer. There was no way that she could lie to him about this even if he wouldn't understand.

"What about me?" she asked, knowing automatically the answer that she would receive.

"A few things but knowing why you bit your lip would be nice," Kratos said giving her a smile that she returned.

"Oh that? I was thinking about that girl that attacked us on that trail."

"The Ossa Trail."

"Yeah, that one. It's just, well, I've been thinking about her a lot lately," she began and started to bite her lip in habit, before stopping with a jolt. _I really should ditch that old habit_, Anna thought absentmindedly. "I feel so badly for her."

"She was trying to kill us, Anna."

"I know that," Anna replied, feeling annoyed. "But when I looked into those eyes of hers, those weren't the eyes of some battle-hardened assassin willing to kill without a care, they were the eyes of a girl that was afraid and trying desperately to hide it. I just--I'd hate for that girl to die for some lie that someone fed her."

"Yes, I suppose you are right," Kratos looked a little surprised by the revelation. "She is a person with motives, after all."

"Yes that's right, I'm glad you agree. I know it's really complicated and you might not be able to, but--well, would you try to see if you could avoid killing her if you run into her again?"

"I'm sure that we will run into her again, she seems very adamant about killing the Ch--Colette for whatever reason," he said, and Anna was glad that he didn't refer to Colette as the Chosen, but had no time to think on it. "There may be no choice in the matter if it's during a battle where she is attacking to kill."

"Yeah, I know that but could you please not kill her or even attack her if there's no other way?"

"Of course not. I wouldn't want her to die if she didn't have to, she's so young."

"Yeah, she is, isn't she? So is Colette."

"Yes, she is. It's best that Colette lives as well as she can in the time that she has."

"You're right. She seems like such a cheerful girl, too. I can only hope she doesn't keep anything more inside."

"Was she doing that?"

Anna hesitated, wondering how much she let slip. "Yeah. I don't want to say too much, I feel like I gained her trust so--"

"I understand, I don't mind at all. Such a shame that she has to die."

"What did you just say?"

"Anna, you know what I meant," Kratos said and Anna did not respond. "You can't truly believe that I want her to die or I may take some perverse pleasure in this ordeal."

"Of course I don't! It's not like that at all, please don't think that. You're not a terrible person, I know that," Anna said as she grasped the hand that was covering her own and brought it to his face. "It just gets so confusing sometimes, you know? This whole thing especially after the Fire Seal. You didn't seem to care so I thought the worst. I know I shouldn't have, but seeing Colette go up there and willingly begin the process of her death and then have her withstand the pain," Anna shuddered at the thought and her gaze on Kratos wavered. "It's too much, it was just too much to see all that at once, and you didn't really seem fazed by it. I guess that maybe I blamed you since I wanted someone to blame and I know I shouldn--"

"Shh," he said and silenced her words by placing fingers from his free hand on her lips. "I know all that, you don't need to justify yourself."

"But I--"

"Anna, all I'm worried about tonight is you. I was worried about how all this was affecting you. Please, you can't expect me to think that your opinion of me has to be unrealistically high at all times. I know this is difficult for you and I know that I'm not the kind of person to express any overt concern over anyone but you and Lloyd. That must be confusing to you who cares so much about others. I can't blame you for thinking those things," Kratos said, as his fingers stubbornly remained against her face that was heating up rapidly. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't worried about what you think of me, I do care for you, but I knew there had to be a reason behind it. I'll try to help them, please don't worry about things that are out of your control anymore."

Anna felt her heart pound against her chest so much that it made her feel dizzy and she felt a heat flow through her whole body. Really? Was this him doing this to her, just like before in Triet? These feelings all reminded her of when they first met. It felt like there was still a part of the Kratos that she used to know in there, struggling to get out. A part was better then nothing, right?

Anna pressed her lips against his fingers slowly as she rose on her knees and lent towards him, feeling his heat against her that now for some reason felt scorching. She brought an arm about her shoulders and looked down on him, looking into those eyes that held all of those arrays of emotions that she _knew_ hers held. She felt an arm wrap about the middle of her back and she lowered her head down to brush his lips.

"I'll try to, okay? I still want to help who I can."

"I wouldn't have it any other way," he said softly and she felt his hot breath against the skin of her lips. His arm tightened about her and hers tightened about him as she brought her lips against his own and lost herself in a moment just like she knew he had. They both deserved the moment, of this she was sure as his lips moved against her own.

* * *

_A/N: I swear the next chapter is not going to be that long. Srsly._


	15. Treasure

_A/N: Told you it wouldn__'t be that long. Thanks for bearing with that ridiculous hiatus and lack of story, I know it's me being silly and it hasn't been for lack of ideas. Next update will come probably in the next week or two, depends how much time I have in between a midterm, a convention and other stuffs. Named this song after The Cure song Treasure since it's a pretty song that sorta fits. _

_

* * *

_

_Treasure_

Anna shifted her feet on the inn's wooden floor so that her legs wouldn't fall asleep as she sat behind Colette and vaguely heard the conversation that the kids were having around her. Sweat trickled down her brow but she ignored it as she concentrated on the braid and brought one bunch of Colette's blonde hair that was in one hand and brought it across from the bigger one that hung loose. It was supposed to be two, or so said Colette, but it was so hard keeping them apart so she let the meld into one as she crossed it, before separating them again. That couldn't be that bad, right?

"I'm not sure I'm doing this right, Colette."

"Don't worry, it's okay," Colette said cheerfully as she fidgeted her head. "I'm not the greatest at doing the either, especially at the back. It never works out right, but I think that's 'cause my arms always get tired."

"Thanks for reminding me," Anna said teasingly as she haphazardly wove another piece across from the other.

"Oh, I didn't mean it like that."

"Hey, hey don't worry about that," Anna said, weaving another piece. "It's not like I wasn't serious. Trust me, tired arms aren't really that bad."

"Oh, okay. I'm sorry."

"You don't have to be sorry," she said as she wove more pieces of hair Yes! She was finally down to just below her shoulders. Almost done.

"Yeah, there's nothing to be sorry about," Lloyd's voice came from behind them. "You should really stop apologizing so much."

"I guess so, I'm sorry."

Anna laughed lightly as she continued working. "I don't think you're going to be convincing her anytime soon."

"Um, is that a bad thing?" Colette said tentatively.

"Of course not," Anna said as she plaited more parts of her hair, trying to ignore how bumpy it was turning out. "It's just part of who you are."

"But I like who Colette is, mom, I just think she shouldn't have to apologize for things she doesn't need to. Right?"

"Uh…" Colette said.

"You know, I'm sure you're much better at braiding then I am, Colette," Anna said in an attempt to change the conversation. "Even if you have trouble at doing it at the back I'm sure if you practiced you'll get better at it. You'll hate mine."

"No I won't, I know that I'll love it."

"I'm not so sure about that…" Anna murmured to herself, as she continued the process, trying to keep strands of hair from falling from her hands but not being very successful. She ignored the conversation that was going on without her and she secretly wondered how she let Colette talk her into this. _Phew, finally _she thought as she reached near the end of her long blonde hair and brought a hand to the floor and felt the wood grain of the inn's floor before she felt the coarse cloth of the ribbon she needed to keep the braid in place. _If it'll even stay in place_, she thought as she grasped it and brought it to the hair to tie a knot. _I can't believe I let Colette talk me into this_, she thought as she wrapped the ribbon about the braid and saw in her peripheral vision the hair that was fraying out this way and that from the unequal bumpy parts, and she knew it was a sloppily made braid. _Isn't braiding supposed to be easy? _

"Alright," Anna said as she looped the final knot into the ribbon. "I'm done."

"Really?" Colette said and she brought her hands to the back of her head to feel the braid. "Wow, thanks a lot."

"Hey, let me see," Lloyd said and Anna turned her head to see him get up from working on what he told her was for Colette.

"Yeah, me too," came Genis' voice and Anna heard a book snap shut, and Raine didn't respond, probably lost in whatever book she was reading. _Thank the Goddess._ The less people that see this the better. She chanced a glance at Lloyd and his face fell the moment he saw it.

"Well, that's kind of, uh, well…" Lloyd said, and he shifted from foot to foot. Anna couldn't help but feel amused at how nervous he looked. His eyes looked from Colette, to Genis with eyes that were pleading for some kind of help.

"It's, um, well it's different," came Genis' voice.

Anna gave a short laugh. "Yeah, I know it's bad. There's a reason I'm not a hair dresser."

They both let out a sigh of relief.

"How can you say that? I really like it," Colette said. Anna smiled and put a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't worry about it, Colette, you don't have to lie. I figured out a long time ago that I don't have a creative bone in my body."

"Braiding means you have to be creative?"

"Hmm, maybe not. Guess that means that hair is another thing I'm bad at. Colette, if you want I could always take this out-"

"No way! This is so nice, thanks so much Anna," Colette said as she turned around abruptly and gave her a smile so big that dimples came into her cheeks. "I still think it's good and besides, even if the braid gets a bit messy-"

"It already is," Genis muttered under his breath but Colette continued.

"-while I sleep it'll still make my hair all wavy tomorrow."

"It will?" Anna said. She never knew that

"Yep! It'll be nice to have pretty hair for tomorrow. We get to go on a boat, it'll be great."

"Yeah, that'll be awesome," Lloyd said with enthusiasm. "I've always wanted to go on a boat."

"Don't get too ahead of yourselves now, we still need to find a boat to get on."

"Yeah, but we'll find that tomorrow."

"You sure, Lloyd?" Genis said.

"Of course, we have a whole day to look for one. I mean, this is the sea, there's got to be plenty of boats out there."

"If Lloyd thinks so, then I think so too."

Anna smiled at their youthful enthusiasm as she rose to her feet and walked towards Lloyd. "I know you don't remember, but you have been on boats before when you were little."

"I have? Cool! Wish I remember that"

"Don't know if you'd want to," Anna said as she smiled. "You almost fell out of the boat once."

"Seriously?"

"What did he do?" Genis asked with a knowing smirk.

"How do you know it was me? Maybe it was an accident or something."

"Actually, it was you," Anna said with a smile. "You were being rather adventurous and when me and your father took our eyes off you for a minute you were climbing up on the railing that we told you, you weren't supposed to. You were so close to falling into the sea, you weren't exactly very graceful. I was so scared."

"That's terrible!" Colette exclaimed. "I hope Lloyd didn't drown."

"Uh, I'm right here, Colette."

"You are?" She turned to look at him and breathed a sigh of relief. "That's good."

"It was your father that got to you before you fell in. He was so mad at you, so was I, but at least you were okay," she said softly, recalling the memory that was still vivid in her mind and she fingered her locket absently. "Where is your father, anyway?"

"Dad? Last time I checked he was outside."

"Still?" She asked with a bit of surprise. He'd been out there for hours and he did say that he would come back soon. Worry came from her stomach. "I think I'll go out for a bit."

"Really mom, why would you want to do that?"

"To look for Kratos. He's been out for a while and I know he can take care of himself but I'd still like to check up on him."

"Uh, I can check on him instead."

Anna tilted her head. "Why would you want to do that?"

"W-well, uh, I wouldn't want you to go out of you're way for nothing."

Anna smiled. "Thanks, sweetie, but I've been wanting a walk. Besides, I want to talk to him."

"You can always do that later."

Anna tilted her head in confusion. Lloyd was so transparent, he was terrible at hiding things. "What are you not telling me?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well you seem to care so much if I go out to look for Kratos. There's got to be something that you're hiding."

"Hiding something? I-I'm not hiding anything."

Anna gave a small laugh. "Okay then. So if I were to walk out of here, you wouldn't have a problem with it since there's nothing you're hiding, right?"

"Well I, uh, w-well…I guess not."

"Good," Anna said with lingering amusement and she did not bother to look at whatever expression she knew was on Lloyd's face. Whatever he was trying to do, he wasn't very good at it, she thought as she walked towards the wooden door of the inn and pushed it open to met the cool night air of Izoold. She closed the door behind her and breathed in the salty air as she took to walk along the dirt path.

_ Where could Kratos be? _Anna thought as she walked slowly along the path and scanned the surrounding area for any sign of Kratos. Her eyes stopped at the sea. It was so pretty, the stilled sea reflected the moon and stars of the night sky that looked as if she really wanted to she could go and swim out to one and pluck it from it's place in the sky. She shook her head, she could admire it later._ Doesn't matter where he is, I guess, this village was pretty small. Shouldn't take too long to find him. _And it didn't. There he was, sitting on the sand of a small beach, right beside the docks leading further into the village. His dark silhouette contrasted the stars that were glimmering like jewels. She smiled. It was beautiful, but she couldn't just leave Kratos alone on what could be the last time they could spend together. She took a step forward.

* * *

"Great," Lloyd muttered under his breath as he looked at the wooden floor planks and kicked a foot into them, hearing a thud. _At least she didn't leave for hours…now it's all on you, dad._

"What's the matter, Lloyd? Is something wrong?" Came Colette's voice. He looked up and saw her in front of him, with concern filling her blue eyes.

"N-no, nothing's wrong," he said as he tried to ignore her ridiculous braid.

"Really? Oh, that's good. I thought that there was something wrong, I mean you look all out of it."

"Out of it, I-I'm not out of it," he sighed and he looked at Colette. Lloyd might have said he wouldn't tell anyone, but it looked like mom was going to find out anyway. "Okay, maybe I am a bit. I don't mind telling you about it, you can keep a secret."

"Of course I can!" Colette said with a determined look, and she brought her hands in front of her. "You can tell me anything."

He smiled. "Okay, good. Uh, mind following me?" he asked and she nodded her head.

He moved to the corner of the room where his bag of stuff was. Maybe he could give her a part of her birthday present now, they were going to Luin soon and she'd have to keep on the journey without him. Now's a better then later, right? He sat down on the wooden floor with his bag beside him and gave Genis a look that told him that Lloyd didn't want him to come he would leave them alone. Lloyd liked him and all but he kind of wanted to be alone with Colette right now, they weren't going to be together too much longer after all and he kind of wanted to give it to her alone. Genis gave a knowing wink that really annoyed him. Ugh, he couldn't wait to wipe tha-

"What's the matter, Lloyd?" Colette's voice drew him out of his thoughts, and he just noticed that she was sitting right across from him.

"I-it's nothing, it's nothing, honestly," he said, before he took a deep breath. "You want to know what I was thinking about before, right?"

"Uh-huh," Colette said as she bobbed her head which sent that ugly braid up and down.

"Thing is, ever since Triet my dad's been working on these presents for my mom."

"So that's why Kratos had a rock collection," Colette said as if she just had an internal revelation.

"Rock collection?" he asked with shock. That made no sense that dad would have one of those. "What're you talking about? Dad doesn't have a rock collection."

"Yes he does, I saw it with my own eyes," she said and he couldn't help but stifle a laugh at her over-dramatic statement. "Back in Triet, I saw him with a bunch of rocks. When I asked him about it he told me that it was his secret rock collection and he was afraid that other people would make fun of him for it if they ever knew. I promised that I wouldn't tell anybody so that'd never happen, oh, you can't tell anyone about his rock collection."

"Uh, Colette, he never had a rock collection."

"Of course he did!" she said emphatically, leaning forwards. "He just wrecked his collection since he cares about your mom that much."

"Uh…sure, Colette," Lloyd said, at a loss of what else to say. Not like he wanted to pop her bubble dream. "Anyway, it wasn't just my dad that was working on those presents."

"It wasn't?"

"Nope, he asked me to help him out. Something about him wanting both of us to make them."

"That's such a great idea! You've always been so good at making necklaces for me."

"I know, I'm the best at making stuff like that. Now dad knows that too," Lloyd said, pleased at the compliment and her smile widened. "Anyway, since dad needed some more time to finish her birthday presents off I was supposed to keep her busy."

"Really, they're birthday presents?" she said with excitement lacing her voice. "That's so sweet! I didn't know it was her birthday, it's so close to mine! I need to wish her happy birthday."

"That's a great idea, I'm sure she'll love that Colette," Lloyd said with a smile at her enthusiasm. "I'll have to do that too."

"We can always go now. Maybe if we're quick we can catch up to her and make sure she doesn't find Kratos," she said, and looked like she was about to get up. He caught her elbow.

"Naw, Colette, if we did that mom'd find out for sure. Besides, even if they're not all ready maybe she'd still be surprised out there, or maybe dad'll be able to hide them."

"Oh, okay. I hope it all works out."

"Yeah, me too," he said before he grabbed his bag and reached inside to rummage around. "Anyway, speaking of birthdays I still didn't finish your present but I made something else since you're going to be going soon. I guess you can call it part one of your present."

"Really? That's great," she said. He finally felt the wooden shape that he needed and grabbed it as he pulled it out of the bag.

"Here," he said bringing his hand in front of him. "I know it's not much, but ever since you liked that flower so much I, uh, wanted you to have it."

"Lloyd, thank you so much," she said and he heard the emotion that must've been running through her seeping into her voice. Her hand brushed his as he grasped it and gazed at it as she brought her fingers to trace along the edges of it, resting on each point of the six pointed flowers for a moment before continuing on. "How'd you do this?"

"I carved it. I just had to work off memory, so I hope it's okay."

"It's better then okay, it's amazing," Colette said as she brought her eyes up to meet his and brought her hand to his for emphasis. His body instantly heated for reasons he didn't get. "It's so pretty, I can't believe you could carve something so nice."

Those eyes were so filled with gratitude, Lloyd felt an elation fill him that instantly made him feel better for messing up with mom and he wasn't quite sure why but he didn't care. He did good and he knew it. Now all he had to do was to make sure that he made her real birthday present by the time she came back to see him in Luin after she regenerated the world.

* * *

Anna walked across the sand of the beach that made a scrunching sound underneath her boots. Kratos was coming closer but he made no motion that showed that he noticed her approach. She frowned. That was odd, he always could tell when she was coming. A soft wind blew on her skin and through her hair as she kept walking, and now was close enough to see that Kratos was doing something with his hands, but she couldn't see what. _Is that why he's out here?_

"Hey," she said to draw attention to herself, as she continued to walk towards him.

"Anna, I wasn't expecting you," Kratos answered without turning about to see her and she heard the light clinking of metal. She frowned. Metal? How odd. "I thought that you wouldn't notice."

"Of course I'd notice," she said as she moved closer to him, now able to see his hands that were busy hiding whatever he was doing before. She strained her eyes but she still couldn't see. "You have been out here for awhile."

"Yes, I suppose you're right," he said absently before finally turning his head towards her and his eyes glimmering in the starlight.

"So what have you been doing out here all alone?" she asked as she sat beside him, feeling the cool sand beneath her. Although her eyes were on him in her peripheral vision she saw that his hands were wrapped tightly around…something.

"What makes you think that I've been doing anything? Perhaps I was sleeping"

"You've been out here for hours," she said flatly and he smiled with her. "Besides, I know something has to be up. Lloyd was really trying to make sure I didn't come to find you."

Kratos chuckled. "I should've known he wouldn't have kept you busy for this long."

"Kept me busy?" Anna said, then suddenly all the previous events all clicked in her head. "So that's what all that was about."

"Yes it was. At least I had enough time to finish."

"Finish what?" she asked and her brows furrowed in confusion before an epiphany struck her. "Oh, you mean what you're holding now, right?"

"So you noticed that," he said with a smile and Anna tried to frown, but the she couldn't help the smile that crept onto her face. He chuckled.

"I wanted to give you these things when we got to Luin, but I suppose it can't be helped," Kratos said as he brought his hands above from his was lap and opened them so she could see what was there. What she saw made her breath catch in her throat. All for her…? A long silver chain snaked about his hands which had different sizes of stones, with a smooth glass heart lying in the palm of his hand and a smaller chain with many smaller stones and even a wooden flower. So this is what he's been doing all this time all alone. She felt a warmth and a pleasure at how utterly thoughtful he was being that it reminded her of how he was before and how _they_ were before.

"So this is what you've been working on," she said through her awe and heard him murmur in agreement and she could feel his expectant eyes on her but they were not unwelcome. She brought her shaking fingers to feel the necklace with the silver chain and dark stones that glistened in the starlight. The stones and glass were smooth and warm from the heat of his hands. Her eyes moved to what had to be a bracelet, with those same dark stones but they were smaller and rounder and some were shaped in little hearts that were polished so much that they shone.

"They're so beautiful," her voice must've reflected the awe and myriad of emotions she was feeling just then, as she moved her hand to a wooden flower that looked like-no, it was exactly like that trillium that Colette liked so much. She brought a hand to take it into hers. It was a ring. She couldn't tell before, but she saw it now and she instinctively slide it on a finger. It was smooth, whatever was done to it she knew she wouldn't be getting any splinters from it.

"I'm glad you like it," he said through a pleased voice and brought a free hand to the hand that had the ring. She felt the warmth of his hand seep into hers. "Lloyd made that."

"Lloyd made this," her voice held amazement and she brought her other hand to cover the flower and his hand.

"Yes, he did. I suggested that he make a wooden flower for you and Colette but he did all the work."

"Lloyd helped you on all of this, didn't he?" she said absently, thinking of Lloyd's behaviour then felt a thrill at how that realization sunk in. Lloyd actually helped to make these beautiful things for her.

"Yes, he did," Kratos said. "He's helped me quite a bit, I don't think I could've made all of this in time without him. I didn't start this tonight, I've been working on this ever since I know you were going to be traveling with us in Triet."

"You've been planning this all along?" she said and more thrill overcame her as he saw him nod with a smile. This reminded her so much of before when he acted like this and was so caring and so…sweet. "Thank you. I really mean it, thank you. It really does mean a lot to me."

"I'm glad," Kratos said with a low voice as he smiled and his eyes had that look in them that she was so used to seeing him wear. She smiled back at him and gazed into those eyes that glimmered in the starlight and lost herself for a few moments, before she felt his gentle lips against her own. She trailed her hand up his arm and to his hair that was rough from the travel but she didn't care. Her lips were softly against his before she brought them away, and pressed her forehead against his.

"I love you," he murmured and sent warm breath floating against her skin that made her shiver. His brown eyes were filled with such emotion and she didn't feel any guilt since she couldn't return those emotions now. Everything he had said before about not caring…that was all rubbing off on her now, wasn't it? She gave a short laugh.

"Is that truly funny?" he asked, but she knew by his tone that he wasn't serious.

"It's not like that. I was just thinking about something."

"Oh?"

"Just about how you're rubbing off on me, that's all."

"I would think that would've happened quite some time ago."

"Hey, don't make fun," she said and earned a short laugh from him. "It's all those things you said before. I-I think that I'm okay with how things are. Well I'm not actually, don't get me wrong, but I think that I can accept it all and maybe..."

She didn't want to finish that sentence. What would he think about that? He already put all that work-

"Good, you've finally come to your senses," he said and she didn't quite know if he was serious or not. Before she could say anything she felt him lean away from her and his hand that held hers move away replacing his warmth with the cold ocean air. She heard the waves lap against the shore as she heard the clinking of metal. His two hands came to her with each side of the necklace pinched between his thumb and forefingers.

"Wait, before you put that on me should have my locket so-"

He shook his head. "Not tonight, Anna, please."

His eyes were begging her and who was she to let the disappointment fall that would be there if she refused? This was probably part of his big plan, or something, even if he couldn't do this when he planned…why should she deny him? She could give it to him when they got to Luin, anyway.

"Okay," she finally said as she nodded slowly. She turned in the sand that was now warmed by her body so that her back was to him. That's how he put on the locket, she remembered that night very clearly. Fingers brushed against her hair and she felt the chain against her neck and felt those fingers against her skin, struggling to close the clasp.

"You sure you don't need help?"

"Yes," he said bluntly and she felt bemusement rise in her. He _was_ having trouble with this, so much so that he couldn't be bothered to string together a proper sentence. Goddess, it was just a clasp. She giggled, she couldn't help it, and heard him mutter something under his breath before she felt his hands come to her shoulders and felt his body press closer to hers, enveloping her in warmth.

"Finally," she said before leaning against his chest. "I thought that you'd never finish."

"I'm sure," he said sarcastically, and she felt his hands come down her shoulders and to her hand. She saw the bracelet in one of them.

"You can let me do it, this time. At least I won't take ages."

"I did not take ages."

"Yes you did. It's not your fault, your fingers are too fat."

He chuckled. "And how do you propose to close this clasp with one hand?" he said as she rose the hand with the ring and felt the chain against her wrist.

"Simple, I'll just use you."

"Oh?"

"You hold the end with the loop and I'll hold the other one where I'll need to open it. Keep your hands steady, now," she said with a smile, and she could hear Kratos' short chuckle.

"Alright then," he said. True to his word he did keep the end he needed to and she brought her free hand to her end, and attached it with ease.

"See? That was simple," she said and suddenly became acutely aware of his chin resting on her shoulder and his leg pressed against her own.

"Yes, it was. Maybe I should stop relying on my 'fat fingers'."

Anna laughed and lent her head against his and brought her hand to squeeze his hand. "I think you're catching on."

"I don't know if this is a good thing or not."

"Trust me, it is," she said but instead of a laugh Kratos moved his hand from hers slowly up her arm and she soon felt that hand on her face, while it slowly and gently tilted her head upwards. All the lingering things that she wanted to tell him left her as she met his eyes. They were soft and hazy and shaped in such emotion that she recognized them holding only for her. His breath was soft and she felt his lips meet hers in a kiss. She kissed him back gently and felt an arm wrap around her shoulders and felt the warmth and his taste overwhelm her senses. It was so nice-no that word wasn't good enough for this feeling but she could barely think- and her mind flashed back to so many kisses they shared in the past but all those memories dissipated as his lips moved faster against her own and she matched them kiss. Everything was so warm and it felt so right, for some reason that she couldn't contemplate in that moment.

"Happy birthday," he murmured against her lips as he drew away slightly, breathing haggardly against the skin of her chin. She shivered and she brought an arm about him to pull him closer, that's all she wanted now no matter how irrational it was and she felt more of his warmth before he drew his lips towards hers again. It was soft and gentle before he drew his lips against her face kissing her again and again along her cheek, her forehead, her hair. She brought her lips against his cheek and moved it lightly against his skin so they met his neck before she fully let those two words he uttered register in her mind. Her eyes widened slightly.

"It's my birthday."

"Technically it was yesterday, but I thought it was the celebration that counted."

"I-I forgot. I can't believe that I'm this much older now and I forgot."

"You did?" he said and she heard the subtle twang of hurt in his tone.

"I normally don't, Kratos, you know that. I don't want to forget my birthday the same way you forgot yours."

"I never wanted you to forget it either," he said a bit more strongly and she felt his muscles tense. "I regret not knowing when my birthday is. I don't even know how old I am anymore, I can just estimate based on history."

"Kratos-"

"I don't want that to happen to you. I want nothing like that for you."

"It's not going to happen to me," she said and pressed her lips against his neck. "Kratos, I remember when my birthday is, honestly I do, I just lost track of time because of everything that's happened. I'm sure that I'd figure out I missed it later on."

"You're right," he said through a sigh of relief and she felt his muscles relax.

"At least you're here to remind me," she said. "And besides maybe it'd be better if I did forget when it was. Then I would never know when I'd turn fifty."

He chuckled. "Fifty? You're worried about fifty?"

"Yeah, yeah, I know it's six years away but that's still soon," she shuddered. "I don't want to think about it."

"It's not that old, Anna, there's nothing to worry about."

"Yeah, to you maybe but fifty means I'm old and I don't even look it," she cursed herself right after she said that. Just the thing to tell him now.

"Is that why you-"

"Yeah, well, sort of," she said, anticipating his question. "I never cared too much about getting older, it is one of those things that always happens after all so there's no use trying to fight it. But…I haven't aged in so long. When I'm fifty I'm not even going to look it. I'll still look so young."

"You'll age eventually," he said, and she knew that he was trying to comfort her. "You don't have to stay the same way forever."

"Yeah, I know that…" Anna mumbled. "But it won't be the same. My age and my looks won't match, and besides, you won't be there with me growing old with me. I'll be able to age normally and you'll be the same age."

"I remember what we wanted before but you shouldn't worry about that now, Anna, I'll be fine. I've lived like this for some time, I know how to manage," he said softly and she felt a hand come to her hair. "What we wanted turned out to be a dream, don't worry about it anymore."

"But I don't worry about it, this is just something that's bothered me, that's all. You make it sound like dreaming is a bad thing. There's nothing wrong with dreaming, Kratos. Dreams give people hope for the future and help them to work towards that future. They're good things."

"Even an impossible dream?"

"Yeah," she said and tightened her hold on him. "If it can give you hope and make you happy, even a little bit, then I think any dream can give people hope. Isn't that what drives people forward? Hope isn't be a bad thing."

"I suppose not. I should've known this is what you've been thinking."

"What do you mean by that?"

"Have you seen the stars that are out tonight?" he asked and she knew he was trying to change the topic. That was okay, a different topic would be better. "They're quite beautiful."

"Yeah, they are," Anna said and she turned her head to see the star encrusted sky that was mirrored in the ocean. Everything seemed so calm and she felt that same calmness within her as she felt Kratos against her. "Thanks for this, Kratos."

He voiced no response but she felt lips press against her head and they stayed in silence. The atmosphere was so calm, the ocean was still and smooth and she felt no wind about her. He was acting like he did before for once she felt like she was at peace. It wouldn't last forever, she knew that, but at least it was here for now and that would be enough for her.


	16. Home

_A/N: PLEASE READ: It's come to my attention that some people might not know the hard path and the easy path during this part of the game. The group went from Izoold directly to Luin to follow the hard path. The easy path would be from Izoold to Palmacosta which is the path most people tend to take. I want to avoid any confusion for people that haven't bothered to do a mania run or just don't know this. I'd rather not have people go 'Wait, wut?' after they read this.  
_

_Yeah, another chapter not so long! Go me! Written while listening to the Glee soundtracks, currently loving the show. Guaranteed for another two seasons too! Hurrah!_

_ This chapter is also named after a song from Glee. I think I have a new obsession._

_

* * *

_

_Home_

_Looks like it's gonna be a nice day, _Lloyd thought to himself as he felt the warm morning sun against his face and wove his way through the people that were moving to where they needed to be for the day. It had been a while since dad and Colette and Professor Sage left to keep up that exciting journey without him and Genis and mom. Well, at first it had. They did come back here, something about getting a key but he didn't really pay attention to the particular. He forgot exactly how many days it was since they first left, then when they left the second time, but that didn't matter, it felt long enough to him to make it feel like this was a new life. _There's even school I have to go to now_, he thought and his stomach plummeted of what he was going to have to endure later on. _Too bad dad isn't here for keeps yet, when he gets back school will be easier. He's way better at explaining things then anyone else._

"You know," Lloyd said, attempting to spark a conversation as he continued to walk, and felt a gust of wind blow against his skin and send his white scarf flying behind him. "I think I like Miss Evans' a lot more then Professor Sage."

"You don't like my sister?" Genis replied as he kept in time with Lloyd. The comment sent shock through him.

"That's not what I mean!" Lloyd exclaimed. "I like Professor Sage just fine. Miss Evans is a better teacher, that's all."

Genis snorted. "That's because she doesn't know you never pay attention yet. When she does she'll punish you just like my sister did."

"Naw, that can't happen. I haven't even seen her punish anybody for anything."

"Yeah, not yet anyway. How long have we been here again?"

"Long enough. I got hit in class like every week before in Iselia, and here I got nothing."

"I repeat, that's because you never paid attention. As soon as Miss Evans figures you out she's totally going to be like Raine," Genis said with his arms crossed and looked at him like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Nu-uh, she's not going to, she's way too nice. We got it made here even if the stuff in school is boring," Lloyd said as he rounded a corner of the street and looked across the street to the big fountain that amazed him every time he saw it. _It's so big, they never had anything like this in Iselia, _Lloyd thought as his movements slowed so he could better see the water that glistened in the sun and the white marble. There were people all around it and he saw someone with a head of black hair that he knew he had seen before. _Is that that girl?_

"Lloyd," Genis said with annoyance coursing through his voice who was somewhere Lloyd didn't care to note. "Aren't you coming?"

"Yeah, yeah, just a 'sec. You can go on without me, I think I see someone I know," Lloyd said and turned back to the fountain. Yeah, it _was_ who he thought it was, he could see her perfectly now. Curiosity raged through him and he figured he should go up to her. _Mom'd want me to talk to her too, I think, she really wanted to know about her before. Maybe I should talk to her…_

"Who? Is it Colette? She did say that they'd probably be coming back again soon."

"Naw, it's not Colette."

"Okay, then, way to sound ominous," Genis said and Lloyd briefly wondered what ominous meant. "C'mon, it can wait 'til later, we're gonna be late for school."

Being late wasn't a big deal, Lloyd never got why Genis cared so much about it so much, nothing was going to happen if they were late with Miss Evans. Besides if this was who he thought it was there might be one chance to talk to her.

_ Mom would totally want me to do this and Colette might too, that__'d be cool if she'd like it_, Lloyd thought as he walked towards the fountain where that black-haired girl was standing as she looked pensively into the water._ She looks kind of harmless from this angle, maybe she's actually nice, who knows? No way anything could go wrong._ The closer he got the more he knew that she was definitely the one that attacked them before. _Yes! I'm right! _Sure, it was probably stupid of him to approach her now, but maybe if he talked to her it-well, he didn't know what it'd do but it might do something. Planning was never his thing.

"Uh, hey," Lloyd said, and she turned to him but her brown eyes that were downcast before now flashed to his with anger.

"What do _you_ want?" she asked as she curled her hands into fists. "If you wanna start a fight here-"

"No, no, you got me all wrong," Lloyd said with his hands waving in front of him. "I don't want to start a fight, it's way to early for any of that," he expected a laugh but her eyes only narrowed. "I just wanted to talk. Seriously, that's it."

"You've gotta be kiddin' me. Do I look stupid?" she said as she turned her body towards him and looked about the area looking pretty suspicious, almost like she was ready to pounce at any moment. "There's others just waiting to fight, right? You're just like that lady that wanted to distract me before."

"Hey, 'that lady' is my mom and I'm not trying to distract you at all," Lloyd said with the beginnings of anger of his own. Maybe this was a bad idea after all. "And neither was she, she was just trying to talk you out of attacking Colette."

"Oh, so that's what you're trying to do? If that's your big plan then here's news to ya: it's not gonna work."

"Lloyd, we should get going," came Genis' small voice and Lloyd turned surprised to see Genis standing there. He followed him? _Since when? He was so into school and being late and stuff._

Lloyd shook his head, he'd just ask him later, and turned his eyes back to the girl. "There's no big plan here, I just wanted to talk to you. I mean, there's gotta be a reason you were attacking us, right?"

"Right," she said but said no more and she crossed her arms across her chest.

Lloyd laughed nervously. "Look, Colette's not here anymore, she's been gone for awhile now, so don't think that I'm trying to trick you or something. I just saw you here and thought maybe we could talk."

"Lloyd," Genis said through an exacerbated voice. "Do you really think you should be telling her that?"

"It's not like I'm telling her where they are now, besides if dad's there with her there's not going to be a danger problem," Lloyd said, looking at Genis and remembered how he overheard dad and Raine talking at length about where they should go next. He turned his attention back at the girl. "Anyway, there's no real reason for us to fight, right? Colette's long gone. If you can believe it she actually wanted to make friends with you," Lloyd said through a nervous laugh, but Sheena just looked at him through some shocked eyes. Yeah, no wonder she wouldn't expect this. "So maybe we could, uh, talk about stuff sometime. Genis here would be fine with that, right Genis?"

Lloyd elbowed him in the arm. "Uh, y-yeah, sure whatever."

"And I know my mom would too."

"Your mom?" the girl asked slowly through a confused voice. "So you guys are staying with her?"

"Yeah, this is where she's from so we're staying with her here. We actually weren't supposed to go on the Journey of Regeneration but-"

"Lloyd, could you save this for later? This is kind of a long story and we do have school."

"Right, right. Anyway, if you change your mind about talking to us later, we could catch you at the festival or you could always drop by the inn."

" 'The inn'? You're talking like there's only one inn in all of Luin," Genis said and to Lloyd's annoyance Sheena gave a small laugh. "Since he already told you everything since he's just _so_ smart," Genis said as he rolled his eyes and Lloyd felt the annoyance intensify. "I might as well tell you where we're staying. It's at Kirby's Inn, just down that street, then you hang a left and then a right."

"Uh, right, what he said," Lloyd answered and looked at the girl whose expression was a mixture of shock and confusion. _Can't blame her for that._ "I'm Lloyd, by the way, and this is Genis."

"Uh…" the girl said, looking at a loss for words what with her gloved hand in front of her mouth. "I'm Sheena."

"Nice to meet you," Lloyd said and outstretched his hand. She looked at it as if it were the most foreign thing in the world. _Well she doesn't have to look like that, it's just a handshake._

"Uh, look," she said as she shook her head and backed away. "D-don't think that I'm gonna take it easy on your friends because of this."

"But I-" Lloyd said but she had spun around and started to run away from them. "Hey, wait!"

"Lloyd, she's gone. You did the best you could but now we have to get to school before we miss the whole day," Genis said, clearly annoyed and Lloyd walked back towards the road, giving a quick look behind him but she was already gone.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm _so_ sorry."

"No you're not. This is just like you too, she could actually come to see us."

"So? She seemed kind of nice. Besides, that's what mom would want."

"And that's why you decided to talk to her? Last I checked you thought she was dangerous."

"Yeah, well…I guess I wasn't thinking."

"What's new?"

"Shut it Genis."

"Ugh, we're going to be late and it's going to be you're fault. I'm blaming you for this when we get there," Genis muttered through his panting breath as they walked as fast as they could past the buildings and the people.

"Hey," Lloyd said through gritted teeth. It's not like Miss Evans would care they were late. Mom wouldn't care they were late, would she? His stomach dropped. She better not find out about this.

* * *

_I can't believe it's been twenty-three days since they first left,_ Anna thought to herself as she crouched and pushed the last wooden box onto the bottom shelf that she had previously filled one by one with apple gels in the back of the store. At least she'd found work quickly enough, the money that Kratos and the others gave them would only last for so long. _They did come back here once for that key, Lloyd was so excited to see Kratos, _she thought as she smiled and picked an Apple Gel that rolled onto the ground. _Good thing I convinced him that it'd be fine if he came back every now and then, it's good for Lloyd,_ she thought.

Truth be told she wasn't sure if it was the best thing for her, if he was going to leave it'd be better if he just left. Or would it? She shook her head, and tried to drive those confusing thoughts out of her head._ He should be back soon, they must've released a seal by now._ She brought her hand from her forehead to wipe sweat from her brow. _Ring. _Anna turned to the door where a middle-aged man that owned the shop, Mr Evans, stood as the tiny brass bell was swung above him.

"How's business been today, Anna?" he asked as he closed the door behind him.

"I'd call it busy but then again I'm not sure what qualifies as busy yet," she said as she stood up and brought her arms above her to stretch them.

He smiled which scrunched his chubby face, causing his eyes to squint. "I'm sure you'll catch on soon enough."

"Yeah, me too," she said as she returned the smile and brought her arms down. "I have to say I was a bit worried when you told me that I'd be working alone for today. I mean, I did just get hired a few days ago, but it didn't turn out as badly as I thought."

"I have to apologize for that again, I would have gotten another worker to do be with you but all of them booked this day off for the festival. Please don't think that I'm a slave driver!"

"Of course I don't," Anna said as she laughed lightly. "I know your daughter's sick and your wife couldn't stay with her 'cause of her work. What does she do, anyway?"

"Ah, yes, I haven't told you much about her, have I?" he said as he walked towards a wooden stool and sat down, gesturing to the stool across from him. "Come, sit down, you've been standing on your feet all day."

"Thanks," she said as she hooked her foot around the stool and sat down, feeling her feet silently thank her. She was surprised that her feet would hurt, but she supposed standing for hours on end were different than what she was used to. Walking and swordplay was one thing, you were always on the move but standing was something much different.

"My wife is a teacher for the kids in this part of town and she's got her hands full and there's nobody to substitute for her, so I had to stay home with my youngest-Juliana," she nodded in response and was about to ask if his wife was teaching Lloyd and Genis but he continued his thoughts quickly. "I've got three kids, by the way, Matt's the oldest at nine and Jeff's six. Funnily enough my wife was the one that wanted boys, but I wanted a girl from the beginning. Juliana's my little angel!" he said as he looked emphatically at her. "Normally she comes with my wife to school but sickness has a way of spreading, so it's best to keep her away from all those kids, y'know what I mean? There's no sense in keeping a three year old home alone, I'd be scared if she'd get sicker and no one was there to help her or even any of the trouble she could get herself in."

Anna nodded and murmured in response as he continued on about the exploits of his three year old daughter who was definitely his favourite child. She was only half-listening, and although she somehow wondered how she got herself caught in this conversation, all she wanted now after a long day was to go to the inn and see her own child.

_How was his day? Did he need her to help out with his homework? Is he fitting in with the other kids? Is Genis fitting in with him too? _All of these questions and more bubbled in her mind and she wanted so much to go to Lloyd and let those questions flow from her, but Kurt was in front of her and looked very involved in the conversation that he kept up by himself. It was alright, though, he may talk a lot but he seemed like a nice enough fellow that cared deeply about his family and others, he was the reason she was working in the first place. Why tell him not to talk about what she told him she wanted to hear? That would be rude. All the other shops weren't hiring but he heard her story and practically insisted on her coming to work here. She-

_Ring._

The bell sent her from her state of half-listening, half-thinking and she saw Kurt shoot up from his seat and look in the direction of the door where saw a group of girls walk in.

"Oh, hello, hello, do come in," he said, then looked at her. "I'm sorry, Anna, we'll have to continue this another time."

She smiled and felt a slight wave of relief. "Of course, I understand. I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Great. I'll need to talk it over with my wife first, but I would love to have you and your son over for dinner," he said as she stood up and walked over to the door.

"That'd be great," she said genuinely and turned around to send him a smile as she waved before she turned back to see the wood-grain door, surrounded by the pale white of the room. She turned the metal knob to open the door and felt the wind against her skin as she stepped out and closed the door behind her. _I can finally see Lloyd. Right, I'll have to tell him about Genis coming too. I'm sure that'll be fine._

People bustled this way and that under the mid-afternoon sun and she joined them as she walked along the street, looking at the colourful signs for various stores in the market district that looked fully prepared for the festival. _Maybe the boys would want to go to that. Their school is over now_, she thought as she walked along the cobble-stoned street. She felt a strange connection to this city and it's people, a connection that she hadn't felt in what seemed like an eternity. It felt like home. She could hardly believe it, she felt like she was home. It wasn't the feeling she had before with Kratos when she told him he, and later Lloyd, was her home, it was something much different. When was the last time she felt this way? It must have been when she was little, before she felt what it was like to be in a ranch or in constant travel or spending years somewhere where there was no sun or water or people with a husband that she had-

She felt someone brush past her shoulder which brought her out of her thoughts and she turned to see exactly where she was. _Damn_. how did she get this far away from the inn? She really wanted to see Lloyd, and here she was getting lost. Now where was she? The road in front of her led to the expanding fields of tall grass and trees where monsters roamed and the other one, oh, she remembered where that street led to. It led to where she grew up before her life was disrupted by the Desians. This brought a recent memory to mind, she was there a few days ago, and it was different then what she expected. There was supposed to be _her_ house, there was supposed to be _her_ family.

_ Anna had followed the streets purely from the instinct that her memories had guided for her and excitement and nerves mixed together inside of her belly. After hours of futile job-search for some reason seeing something made memories re-emerge where she had thought they were forgotten and all she could think about was her old family. It was a need, it was a drive. She wanted to find them so desperately, not the one she helped to create but the one that she had been taken from._

_ Small houses blurred together, she knew which one was the right one and these weren't them, but they were near it. She knew it and she knew that she would find the one that had once belonged to her and when she had finally found the one she recognized she felt her heart frantically pound against her throat and into her throat and all she could hear was-_

_ Thump, thump, thump._

_ The faded home from her memories was that of a big house with white stained wood both on the inside and out with common flowers growing in the flower beds that her father planted. She smiled, she always helped him plant those flowers after she begged him to. She remembered putting the bulbs in the dirt and the watering. Then she saw the house in front of her, and despite the change through all the years it was the same house. Instead of looking big like it did when she was small, now it looked small and the white paint was peeling from the walls with weeds where the flower beds were. It was in definite need of repair, but she still was hopeful, her family could still be there they could've just-_

_ "Daddy, let's go!" cried a young girl that threw the creeky wooden door open. "I wanna see gramma."_

_ "You have to wait for your sisters and mother, honey."_

_ "Yeah, but I wanna go now," the child pouted in her little pink dress, with her back to Anna. "Gramma always has yummy cookies."_

_ "I know that but good things happen to those who wait. Remember when we talked about patience?"_

_ "But I don't wanna wait. I'm going right now," the girl said and abruptly turned around and marched down the lawn, but the thin father was quicker then her little legs and scooped her up into his arms, and she was wiggling all the way._

_ "Hey, hun, you have to wait," he said and flipped her upside down with an arm hooked around her legs. She giggled as he spun her around, sending her dark hair and her dress spinning._

_ Anna snapped into herself suddenly after observing the family and immediately stopped staring at them and walked along the road in a way that she forgot. Empty. She felt empty. Her house, her home, it wasn't hers anymore. There was a new family living there and there was no way that she wanted to ask them about something that they most likely knew nothing of. Her family, her father and mother and sister, they were all gone. She brought a hand to her locket instinctively and instead of metal, felt cool glass against her fingers. Right-her locket was gone. It was with Kratos that was miles away and was gone from her life for good. More family that's gone from her, at least she considered him family once and that counted to her. Why do people always leave? She shook her head and tightened her hold on the glass heart. That wasn't true, it wasn't true at all. These things were all out of her control and all of her family still stayed in her own heart. Besides Lloyd was still with her and she was not going to let him leave. She-_

"Uh, hey," a voice brought Anna out of her unpleasant reverie with a jolt. She looked to see a girl standing in front of her, with brown eyes shaped in the nerves she must have been feeling.

"Hello," Anna said, knowing instantly who this was. But why would she want to talk to her? She shook her head in an attempt to shake out the memory she had been reliving and outstretched her hand. "I don't think I know your name. I'm Anna, by the way."

"Sheena," the girl, Sheena, said and brought her hand apprehensively to meet hers and they shook hands.

"It's nice to meet you," Anna said, feeling the rough gloved hand before she released her. "I didn't know you were staying in Luin."

"Yeah, well, I've been staying here ever since I got here."

Anna tilted her head in confusion with slight understanding. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, nothing, nothing."

Awkward silence followed and Anna seemed more aware of how nervous this young girl was. She wasn't some ruthless killing machine, she was right. "Now what made you want to come up to me? I thought you figured we were enemies or something, you didn't seem to interested in talking before."

"Yeah, I guess I wasn't but I talked to Lloyd and Genis earlier today and they seemed kind of, well, nice."

"You did?" Anna said with surprise but some pride in what the boys did. "That's great. Would you like-"

"Watch it," Sheena said while she looked somewhere behind Anna and her brows furrowed and her stance stiffened into one that Anna knew was close to a battle stance. She turned around, to see a small group of Desians in the near distance that were marching towards them. Towards Luin. Her heart started to pound.

"Look, I know we've got our differences but we gotta fight them when they come."

"I will if it comes to that," Anna said slowly, her mind racing to something, anything she could use to barter with them so she could stop them from coming to her home to destroy it and tear another little girl from her family. The little girl that she had seen days ago flashed through her mind.

"Trust me, it's going to come to that."

"No, not necessarily," Anna said as she shook her head and sent locks of her hair against her face as she continued to think. "I've gotta talk to them before any of this."

"What is it with you and talking," Sheena muttered to herself.

"Because if I can talk to them, then maybe I can convince them to leave everything here unharmed."

Sheena looked to her with eyes full of questions, and Anna's mind flew to as many ideas as possible that could make it happen. She gulped and brought her hands to fists. There was only one way this could turn out alright and she knew that Lloyd was not going to like it but that was alright, as long as Lloyd didn't have to deal with these Desians again. The Desians were closer then she thought and they reached the city outskirts. Anna walked towards them, her eyes focussed on what must be the leader, what with the different uniform they had on. The Desians liked making a show for those that were of higher ranks, making those lower then them wear identical uniforms.

"Hey!" Anna called out to them. "Why are you guys here? What do you want?"

The woman smirked. "Shouldn't I be asking you that, A012?"

"So you know who I am," Anna's stomach plummeted and eyes widened. She knew her number just by looking at her? She frowned and set her face to something unreadable as she studied the woman's features more closely. "Right, I remember you."

"You should, I was one of the guards assigned to you. I've made quite the promotion since you last saw me."

"I can see that," Anna said as she crossed her arms, making sure that the woman could see her Cruxis Crystal glimmer in the sun. "I know why you're here."

"Do you? Care to enlighten me as to what you think?"

"Don't play dumb with me," Anna said with her eyes narrowed. "I am the Angelus Project and I will come with you back to that damned ranch if you leave this town be."

The leader laughed and Anna felt irritation broil inside of her. "And just what would be stopping me from capturing you now and destroy this pathetic town?"

"Need I remind you what this is?" Anna responded, lifting the hand that had the Cruxis Crystal and the woman's smirk changed to a frown. "Now we can make this easy or we can make this hard. You can either attack me, where this girl and I will defend ourselves and will definitely kill many of your people. Even if you would defeat us, there'd still be a great loss of life which I can't say will please your leader. The other option is to let me follow you after you're at least 2 miles away from me. That way I know you won't come back to Luin and backstab me and you'll be able to see me come with you plus there won't be any of your people dead. Just think how pleased Kvar would be to finally have his precious Angelus Project without even one of his soldiers dying."

"Hmm," the woman made a sound to show that she was thinking, but with the slow smirk that came Anna knew the conclusion that she came up with. The woman turned her back to Sheena and Anna.

"Fall back!" she called and the Desians obeyed, marching away from Luin and the woman followed them, glancing behind her to Anna for a moment before turning in front of her.

Anna let out a short sigh of relief before the implications of what she had just agreed to sunk in and sent nerves inside her flying. No, she had to do this. Think of Lloyd, think of Luin, think of Genis, think of Kurt and that little girl. She had to protect them, all of them. There was even a festival tonight and she would hate if that tradition was interrupted. She turned to Sheena who was staring at her with wide eyes as if trying to sort out what just happened.

"H-how could you? What did you…" She said but Anna walked closer to her and squeezed her gloved hands.

"I know exactly what I did. I'm going back to the place that I've hate to protect the city that I love," Anna said as she gave her hands a final squeeze before she slid her trillium- flower ring from her finger and placed it in Sheena's hand. "Now I don't plan on staying there, especially when Lloyd or my husband finds finds out and I know that those guys are going to be coming back here. Do you want to help me?"

Sheena nodded. "Yeah, of course I do. I mean, you just stopped those Desians. I-I care about this place too."

"Thank you, Sheena, I knew that you were a decent person," Anna said and Sheena looked at her with eyes that were still wide in confusion over what just happened. "Now listen closely. This is what I need you to do."

* * *

_A/N: I know being used to moving around and your feet hurting when standing in a spot is odd, but it__'s a true story! At my work I did hear an athletic girl complain about her feet hurting even though she was used to running and all that. I always thought that was weird. Oh, and next chapter in the next week or two. Until next time._


	17. Out of Sight

_A/N: Next chapter~! If anyone actually reads these I just wanted to thank everyone for putting up with me and my depression that seemed to like putting things I love on hold. I feel grateful to you all, it feels kind of cool getting the hits so just thought I__'d give a big shout out to you guys. =3_

_ I wrote this listening to a lot of James Brown, who I can't believe I've only just discovered. He's the man! No, really, he's such an influential figure in music…I feel kind of ashamed that I don't know him better. You know the song 'I feel good nanana, you know that I should?' That's James Brown. Just so ya know, you've probably heard his stuff even if you never heard of the guy. I'll name this chapter after one of his songs even if none of the songs really…fit this chapter._

_

* * *

_

_Out of Sight_

"I don't see her here anywhere," Genis' voice cut through the loud hum of conversation that surrounded both of them in the midst of Luin's fountain square and brought Lloyd's attention back to him.

"Yeah, me neither, we've been looking for hours. This isn't like her at all," Lloyd said as he strained his eyes looking about him to see anyone that even reminded him of her. Mom had to be here, she just _had to_. They looked what felt like everywhere without even a trace of her. _This would be a lot easier if there was no festival_, he thought as he continued to scan crowd than to the marble fountain whose water sent the sun's glare to his eyes. He blinked a few times seeing the bright blotchy colour before he looked away. _She must be lost, that's it, _he thought but he was starting to doubt that thought, feeling the exhaustion of searching kick in. _Where would mom go? _His mind drew blank._ She's gotta be here. I'm just being stupi-_

"…Earth to Lloyd," Genis said and Lloyd saw a hand waving in front of his face. He blinked and looked down to the familiar sight of his friend.

"Huh?"

"What do you mean, 'huh'? You got all spaced out."

"Eh, sorry," Lloyd said as he shook his head, trying to get whatever was up in him out even though he had no idea how it could actually help. "I'm just kind of out of it I guess, she said that she'd meet up with us in the inn and we looked everywhere and she's not even out here. It's so weird."

"Yeah, this is really weird," Genis said with a nod. "Hey, don't sweat it. I'm sure that she's here in town somewhere, there's got to be a logical explanation for this."

"Like what?"

Genis stared at him with no answer but then his brow furrowed in concentration. _Yes! If Genis thought of something he'd get it right for sure. He's smart. _Genis glanced to the ground before his silver eyes came to his emphatically.

"I know! Maybe she's working longer at that shop for some more money and just forgot to tell us."

"Of course, that must be it!" Lloyd said, feeling as though that was the most obvious thing in the world for him not to think of. _Good thing I've got Genis here, he's way smarter then me_. "C'mon Genis, let's go."

"Yeah, sure thing," Genis said and Lloyd turned from him and began to weave his way through the crowd of people that looked as though they were all laughing and having fun with their loved ones.

He wished he could do that.

_ I will_, he soothed the strange sense of urgency that laid in the pit of his stomach as he mumbled an apology for stepping on someone's foot. _I will too, as soon as mom comes to have fun with us_, he thought to himself as he walked as fast as he could, bumping and brushing against some but soon he found himself in the midst of more crowds but this time in the market district, and all seemed to be looking from shop to shop. _Now which one's the one that mom works at?_ he thought as he slowed down and moved to the side of the street so he could avoid people barrelling into him, and looked from one colourful sign to the other._ Right, it's the one that starts with an 'E' and-_

An elbow came to his ribcage.

"Ow! What was that for?" Lloyd said as he rubbed his sore side and stilled his movements. He shot Genis what he hoped was a dirty look.

He rolled his eyes. "Look over there," Genis said and pointed a hand. Lloyd followed it, feeling a bit of hope that this could be mom but it was squashed since instead he saw that girl, Sheena. Her dark brown hair and the funny clothes were sort of bouncing as she jogged in the midst of the crowd for some unknown reason with her head moving this way and that almost like she was looking for something.

"Hey, Sheena!" Lloyd called out without thinking why but she was still jogging and didn't notice his call through all the other voices of people. He cleared his throat and took a deep breath and brought his hands to the sides of his mouth. "_Sheena! Hey, over here!_"

Her head moved to them immediately and he could've sworn she looked relieved as she ran towards them, ignoring the people that she bumped into and held up an brought an arm as if to wave them down.

"W-wait," Sheena said through pants of breath and she stopped in front of them, with a hand on her chest.

"We weren't going anywhere, you're the one that was running," Genis said. "Hey, why were you running like that anyway?"

"I can't…believe that…you two were this hard to…find…" she said in between shallow breaths with sweat dripping from her brow down her face.

"You were trying to find us?" Genis sounded pretty surprised and Sheena nodded.

"Yeah…you guys…gotta listen-"

"Whoa, whoa you can slow down, you know," Lloyd said and inwardly wondered just how long she was running to get so out of breath. "We can wait."

"No…we can't…" Sheena said in between those breaths again.

"You can-" Lloyd stopped when Sheena shook her head, sending her sweat drenched tresses from side to side and she brought her hands to a brown pouch attached to her pink sash and opened it. She brought a hand inside of it and took out a necklace with shiny black stones and a glass heart that looked real familiar, kind of like the same one that he'd help dad to make. A ring followed that was in the same shape that he made and a bracelet-wait, what? It didn't take that long for things to click in his brain and confusion took hold of him again. How would she have gotten _those?_

"How-where did you…?" Lloyd asked, feeling confusion and a curiosity that was eating at him as she brought out a bracelet, a ring and finally…an exsphere? "Hey, that's my mom's!"

Sheena nodded emphatically taking deeper breaths in attempts to coordinate herself. "Y-yeah it is."

"How did you get those?" Genis said and even Lloyd could hear the suspicion in his voice.

"It's not what you think!" Sheena said quickly and held up a hand with her ring finger up as she took a very deep breaths before she continued. "She didn't want the Desians to get a hold on any of these things-"

"Desians?" Lloyd felt shock and some horror flood through him at what he knew was going to come next.

"Yeah, Desians. She said something about them being important to her and she didn't want them to steal them on her."

"So Desians came to Luin?" Genis said with a bit of fear. "But why? Where's Lloyd's mom?"

"They took her."

"What?" Lloyd said feeling a rage at the thought of them having her like they did before he was born. They were what tore them apart before. He started walking towards the crowds in the street.

"I need to explain some things first, she wanted me to-hey, where are you going?"

Lloyd looked back on them. "To get my mom. C'mon guys, if we're quick maybe we can catch her befo-"

"Are you even listening to me? You know what, this is my fault I'm just not thinking clear enough," Sheena said and she took a few more deep breaths before continuing, running a hand through her hair. "Look, I know this is your mom and everything but those Desians are gonna be coming back to Luin pretty soon and this time there's not going to be someone like her that they'll be willing to turn around for."

Lloyd's brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"

Sheena sighed and shifted from foot to foot, fingering the jewellery in her hands.

"She said something about being this Angelus Project and she was pretty willing to go with them if they promised to leave this place alone for now."

"What?" Lloyd said felt a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. That's not what he expected at all. More shock and disappointment mix with the anger and everything else that was going through his mind.

"Yeah, I know, I was weirded out at first too but she's right. It was the only way that they'd leave this place alone. Thing is, they're going to be coming back here and angrier then ever."

"Makes sense," came Genis' voice, finally. "We should probably try to evacuate everyone."

"That's what Anna said to do."

"Great minds think alike," Genis said.

"So we have to evacuate the town," Lloyd said slowly as he wracked his brain to try to think of what the concept was. "What's evacuate mean, anyway?"

"You serious?" Sheena said with eyebrows raised. "Uh, never mind. Evacuating is basically where we've gotta tell everyone what's up and get them to leave the city.

"Right, right, I knew that," Lloyd said dismissively before remembering what got him so upset. "Mom wanted us to do this?"

Sheena nodded and that was enough for Lloyd. He walked out into the streets, with people moving about him this way and that.

"Everyone run! Desians are coming!" Lloyd shouted and the ones that noticed him turned around and laughed. His brow furrowed in frustration. Didn't they know how serious this was?

"Sure they are, honey," came the voice of a woman that walked past him, with her wavy hair cascading down her back in a skin tight dre-he shook his head ignoring the lady and turned to Genis and Sheena looking at him in disbelief.

"What? What'd I do?"

"You're stupider then I thought, Lloyd. You can't get people to leave just by shouting 'Desians' in the street," he feigned a loud and fearful tone when he said Desian and Lloyd narrowed his eyes. "They're probably gonna think you're drunk or something."

"Shut it, Genis. How am I supposed to know how all this evacuating stuff works?" Lloyd said with a rising panic, feeling more and more strained as he turned to Sheena. "I just can't believe she'd sacrifice herself like this. Wasn't there some other way?"

Sheena shook her head with her eyes shaped in sympathy.

"Ugh, things shouldn't have to turn out this way. It's just so…stupid."

"Yeah…" Genis said and looked down at his shoes like they were the most interesting thing ever. "We were just getting comfortable here and now this happens. I don't want this to turn into another Iselia."

"Me neither. That was my fault," Lloyd said feeling the guilt press down on him.

"Our fault," Genis corrected.

They stood in relative silence for a few moments, well silence except for the hum of conversation from the crowd. The guilt about Iselia always seemed to weigh on his mind, even if it was over and done with there was no way that he could forget about- Lloyd shook his head. Just what was he thinking? He couldn't just lie down and give up and wallow in self-pity. That wasn't going to do mom any good.

"Look guys," Lloyd said and both their heads shot up to see him. "We should probably start doing that evacuating thing before we even think about going after my mom."

"Yeah, you're right," Sheena said as she nodded. "She told me to tell you a few things about what to do."

"Oh yeah? Let's hear."

"She said that we should talk to the mayor and some city officials about evacuating the city first and that they're probably in a big public place where they can talk to people," Lloyd made mental notes about all the places he could think of that they would be. "Well, then she said something about going to find some guy named Kratos before thinking about going to the human ranch. Apparently he's due back here soon."

"From the Tower of Mana, of course," Genis said as he slapped his forehead and sounded as though it were the most obvious thing in the world. "How does she know when they're coming back? I know it's soon but…"

"I dunno, she never said but come to think of it. What do you mean, 'they'?"

"Colette's there too. You know, the one you tried to kill."

"Okay, look, you don't have to act so suspicious at the moment. it is a good idea to get more people coming along."

"Yeah, for sure," Lloyd said, figuring in his mind where the best place for them to start going. He turned his boot but-

"Hey, Lloyd."

"Yeah?"

"Uh, she really wanted me to tell you that she loves you and, uh…to give you these," Sheena said as she held out her hands that held the jewellery and exsphere. He gulped as stared at them. He and dad worked so hard on them to get them done so mom'd be happy and now they were there. She'd wear them again. His mouth was set in a firm line and he grabbed them in a hand, and opened a bag of his own on his side. She would wear them again. He brought them carefully inside the bag before closing it.

"C'mon guys, let's go," Lloyd said and both of them murmured in agreement. He turned about and moved through the crowds knowing that they were following behind him. _Hang on mom, I'm on my way._

_

* * *

_

Anna stood in a room that sent gooseflesh across her arms and neck but it wasn't from the cold. The room was the colour of metallic gray and windowless with no light save for the meagre light from a single outlet in the middle of the room. She remembered this place so clearly, more clearly then she would have liked to and she pushed the unpleasant memories that began to uncoil inside her mind. This was no time for any of that, she had to stay strong. She frowned as she tapped a foot against the floor. This was taking too long. As soon as she got pushed into the room by those minions she was left alone, no Kvar or any other Desian to taunt her or torture her or slap that damned exsphere on her.

They wouldn't do that, would they?

She let in a deep breath and swept those fears away. This was no time for any of that. This needed to be done, it was either her or so many of the people of Luin standing where she was, waiting to be diagnosed and more afraid then her. Hell, even that little girl from Anna's old home could be here, torn from her father's embrace and scared just like she was so long ago. She shook her head, this was all too much and no time to relive such memories. She knew this was the right decision and steeled herself for what she knew would come but for some reason was taking longer then she expected. _He sure is making a show of this, isn't he? _

No familiar weight of a sword rested against her hips, which made her more apprehensive and-the sound of a door opening interrupted her thoughts and she shifted her gaze to it. It would be an array of armed guards, she was sure, Kvar never dirtied himself with any of this work that he thought was beneath him. She fully expected that they would strip her of her clothes and replace it with those disgusting brown clothes, and maybe throw in a beating or two for good measure. There weren't armed guards. It was Kvar that stepped through the darkened frame, with features that looked eerily calm. Her stomach lurched but she would not let him see any fear or any apprehension and she squared her shoulders.

"Took you long enough," Anna said as she crossed her arms across her chest.

"Is that really something to say to your superior?"

Anna gave a hollow laugh. "Superior? You? Yeah right."

"I wouldn't laugh if I were you," Kvar said and the corners of his eyes became taunt in irritation. _Good._

"Oh?" she said as she walked closer to him slowly. _Strange, he's shorter then I remember. _"And what's going to happen if I do?"

In the corner of her eye she saw his arm move for what she knew was a weapon and her instincts kicked in. She moved. _Crack._ There was a whip against the metallic floor.

"Gonna have to try better then that," Anna said through a laugh and felt a perverse pleasure at how his features contorted in anger.

"Now you listen here, _girl,_" he practically snarled like the animal he thought she was, as he walked to her. "You are mine now-"

"No I'm not," she said through a forced laugh, and she saw him angered at the interruption and she felt his hand grasp her wrist so tightly she thought a bone would break. She matched her glare with one of her own. She was not going to let him see her perturbed by the pain.

"It seems as if your going to have to relearn how to act in your station, inferior being," he practically spat and she felt her stomach lurch but kept her face a calm mask. His free arm raised and then the familiar cracking of whip against flesh met her ears. It took her body a moment for it to register but her side felt as though it was splitting in two and she winced but quickly hid whatever pain she was feeling from him.

"Oh I get it now," he said as if a revelation kicked in his brain and he chuckled and she felt his grip on her wrist tighten so that she lost feeling in her hand. "You think that your husband is coming to save you from this."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she said through clenched teeth and she felt pain stab in her arm in response. Blood dripped down her side and her leg in rivulets.

"Yes you do. He must be in that wretched town that you think you saved from destruction. You haven't, my soldiers are going back there to destroy it and bring the people there here. They've gone now," he said with a tone of finality, and she let none of the emotions roiling through her come to the surface for him to see. His face held the features of pure rage as he tightened his hold on her wrist and brought a hand to her neck. Instinct brought her free hand to her neck where his hand tightened it's hold and there was suddenly no floor beneath her feet and she kicked and kicked but to no avail. Her eyes widened and she tried to breath but it was as futile as though she were trying to breath underwater.

"Your little husband is not going to find you and he is not going to save you. There are plenty of old, hidden cells that he could never see, even if he breaks in here. Even if he bothers Lord Yggdrasill about it, they will search and find _nothing,_" she thought she heard his laughter but she couldn't tell for sure. Her vision of him was framed in white and red and her brain felt as if it was going to explode. Wind was against her skin and nothing was holding her. _Bang._ That sound filled her ears and the only other thing that registered in her mind was what he had said, what he was saying.

"He'll never find you here," he said, and her brain was beginning to register where she was. Her back screamed in pain and she felt herself against the hard metal of the wall and the floor and her head hung so she could see the floor with her legs flayed out in front of her. _He must have thrown me…_

"Now that I think about it your son would be a perfect candidate for the Angelus Project just like you are. It's a good thing I sent orders for his capture. I can't believe I never thought of getting you to spawn another so that there would be more with your blood, it would have been so efficient. Perhaps I would have what I need right now."

Anna felt numb to what Kvar was telling her. The anger at how he talked of her family was stemmed by a strange, logical voice in the back of her mind. Kvar was trying to scare her and to make her suffer in every way possible. Lloyd would never set foot in this place, she already made sure of it. She raised her eyes slowly to where she saw pools of her own blood and for whatever reason she began to laugh. This situation was utterly absurd. It all made sense now! She brought her weight to her legs and began to rise slowly with eyes on his boots and hideous uniform that were splattered with her blood to his detestable face.

"Those eyes," Kvar spat as she felt a whip against her flesh which caused unbridled pain and she swayed, but readied herself. "I was _so close_ to breaking you and make those eyes lose that damned look."

"No you weren't. You never were," Anna matched his glare with one of her own. "And you never will be. You are a pathetic little man that needs to feed off the pain of those weaker then him because of how they were born. I will never break to someone like you."

_Crack. _Pain came against her leg soon after the sound and she winced, feeling her leg bend in pain but she kept her eyes fixed on his face that was cold and calculating and filled with anger and she exactly why.

"I will never break because of someone like you," she repeated and stared into his eyes with pure hatred.

"Yes you will," he said and she felt the whip under her chin. "I will make you break. All of this pain you're feeling now? That isn't to grow the crystal that I need, oh, no, no. All of this is to make _you_ suffer for no other reason then because of you."

_ Crack._ Again pain came against her other thigh and her legs began to buckle in that all-consuming pain but she would not let them.

"You're never going to escape me."

Through the pain she made her legs stay steady, thinking of the ones that she loved to make her way through the pain so that they were cemented to the ground, unyielding and unbending. Her gaze was steadfastly on him face thinking of only one thing.

_ He cannot win. _

_

* * *

_

"…and that is the formula that you need to find that side of that obtuse triangle. Remember, you only use the Pythagorean Theorum to solve right triangles," Kratos said as he leaned over the shoulder of Colette and peered at her paper, with her pencil in hand.

"Oh, I get it now! So that's what I did wrong," Colette said and he could feel her exude that same happiness. "Thanks so much, Kratos."

"You're welcome," he said with a hint of smile on his lips. Anna was right, she was a nice girl and he'd do everything in his power to keep his promise to Anna. "I trust you'll be fine with the rest of this homework."

"Uh-huh, thanks to you," she said as she bobbed her head up and down, sending her blonde tresses flying.

He smiled softly as she hunched herself over her homework before he got up and walked around the fire that had been burning all night to keep monsters away. They had finally released the next seal, which took more time then would be productive but he shrugged his shoulders as he bent down to tend to the pot of oatmeal that was bubbling over the pot's edge and into the fire. He sighed, and grasped the pot's handle, silently cursing the heat that came from it, so he could move it from the innermost of the fire, setting it to the hot coals and took a wooden spoon that lay in the grass by his side. He stirred it as the bubbles subsided. He knew Raine had insisted on cooking the oatmeal, but from his experience of her cooking it'd be best for everyone's taste-buds to try to take it over.

"What are you doing?" came Raine's voice laced with irritation and Kratos looked up from the pot to see her with a handful of something yellow that she seemed to have wanted to chop up and he couldn't help but be amused by the sight.

"The oatmeal was bubbling and was about to spill over to the fire. I stopped it."

"It was? Great. Uh, thank you," Raine said as she sat down and held her hands over the pot.

"What are those?"

"What do you mean?"

"Whatever it is in your hands."

"Oh these," she said glancing at her clenched hands before turning back to him. "These are lemons. I think that'd it'd be a good experiment to put in oatmeal. It's untraditional."

"For a reason," Kratos said and she shot him a dirty look. "Do you truly think that these experiments should be done to food so early in the morning?"

"It's not that early," she said, sounding quite put out by him fighting the idea. He supposed that this was a touchy topic.

"Even so, do you truly think that Colette should be eating a failed experiment after all she has to endure because of the Journey of Regeneration?"

She opened her mouth to protest but something behind her caught his eye that led him to ignore the response. Noishe? Was that truly him? It looked as though it were him in the near distance, what with the distinct green and white colourings and the familiar way of running that Kratos had become so accustomed to. No, that was impossible, how could Noishe be coming to him. But as Noishe came closer he saw…people on his back? It was a hard time mistaking the bright red that contrasted with the green of the grass and Noishe's fur. His human sight wasn't that bad.

"Kratos?" the sound of his name brought him back to Raine, with the fistful of poorly diced lemons still in her hands. "Are you listening to me?"

Kratos pointed behind her, where she strained her neck to see what he was gesturing before he looked back to him through bewildered eyes.

"Noishe?" she looked back to him with her eyes shaped in bewilderment. "And that must be Lloyd on his back, the colour is unmistakable."

"True," Kratos said, and the closer Noishe got the more he saw that there was more then just Lloyd riding on him.

"Why would they even be coming here?" Raine asked, as she dropped the lemons in the pot, rubbing her hands together so the juices rubbed off them and Kratos didn't bother to protest.

"Your guess is as good as mine," he said, turning around to see that Colette's form was still hunched over her homework, with her brow furrowed in frustration. He sighed and stood up, seeing that Noishe had reached them. His lips formed a wry smile. He should have known his old friend would be so quick on his feet.

"What are you all doing here?" he asked as he walked through the grass and looked as Lloyd, Genis and, that assassin girl slipped off of Noishe. He frowned and put his hand on the rough hilt of his sword.

"What is she doing here?"

"Dad, hey, it's not what you think," came Lloyd's voice as he rushed to him with deep breaths. "Seriously, it isn't."

"Care to explain?" Kratos asked, with an eyebrow raised and his hand still resting on his hilt.

"I'd like to hear this explanation as well," came Raine's voice of disapproval from behind him, and he heard her steps against the grass as she moved closer. "I'd also like to know what exactly you're doing here?"

"Huh?" Colette said softly, and she must have realized who had just arrived then since he heard her scramble loudly to her feet and run towards them. "Lloyd! Genis! You're here! And Miss Assassin Lady too? Great! Uh, what are you all doing here?"

Kratos shook his head at the enthusiasm that her voice held.

"Hey, Colette," Lloyd said simply not sounding very happy at all. Kratos frowned. That was unlike him, he knew those two were close. "I was just gonna say why we're here. It's not a good thing at all."

"Oh," Colette said through a deflated voice.

"Why are you here?" Kratos asked, and his frown deepened when he saw no sign of Anna. He looked to Noishe who whined in response and his ears drooped as his head went down. "Where's Anna?"

"That's kinda part of why we're here," Lloyd said apprehensively and shifted his weight from foot to foot. It was then that Kratos knew somehow that it wasn't going to be something he liked and he crossed his arms against his chest.

"Go on."

"Thing is, uh…well we helped to evacuate Luin because we knew that the Desians were going to come and attack it."

"And how did you find this out?" Raine asked.

"We found out from my mom actually. She talked to Sheena, that's her name by the way," Lloyd said as he gestured to the girl assassin, Sheena now, he mused. "And she made it so that the Desians would leave Luin for a bit."

"How did she do this?" Kratos asked with apprehension. He already knew whatever he was going to hear he was not going to like but he secretly hoped that she wasn't there because she had found a job and couldn't afford to miss a shift.

"Uh, well…" Lloyd trailed off.

"Don't worry about it, Lloyd, I've got it covered," Sheena said and Lloyd flashed her a small smile. "I was there when all this happened. The Desians were almost in Luin but she made a deal with them where she would go back to the ranch if they left the city alone. Something about an Angelus Project, if that means anything to you."

"_What?_" he said as he felt as though a hole had opened up and swallowed what he thought was beautiful and blue in the world. This was not supposed to happen. She was supposed to be safe. All of these emotions that he couldn't identify unleashed themselves. He shook his head, he had to act. He brought a hand to his satchel and quickly out his compass out so he could figure where the direction of the ranch and He began to walk as quickly as he could and felt the conscious shift to his angelic form. This time would be different.

"Hey, where you going?" came Sheena's voice.

"To get Anna," Kratos said dismissively, trying to hide every emotion that was roiling inside him.

"Wait, dad," Lloyd said running up to him. "I'll come with you."

"No," Kratos said firmly, as he stilled his movements and turned to Lloyd. "You're not coming with me."

"Why not?" he said as he looked as though he had the right to an answer. His eyes narrowed at the naiveté.

"You'll get in the way. Be a good boy and stay here."

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?" Lloyd's own anger ran through his voice. "I will not get in the way, I'll be plenty useful. You're not the only one that cares about mom, I'm coming too," Lloyd said while matching Kratos' glare with that same determination that _she had_ with facial features that looked so much like _hers_.

"No you are not," Kratos said through clenched teeth, as he squared his shoulders and he moved closer. Those features-he would not let his son anywhere near there. Not him too. "I am not going to let you come with me."

"Oh, so you're just saying that I'm not coming? Like that's gonna stop me!"

"Lloyd, you don't seem to understand the importance of this," Kratos began, trying to ease the anger that so rarely reared it's ugly head. Did Lloyd truly not realize the danger he would put himself in that Anna tried so desperately to keep him away from? "You see-"

"Oh no, I understand plenty. You don't want me to come 'cause you-you want to do this all on your own! I'm not a baby, you know."

"That's not what-"

"Stop yelling, all of you," cried Colette and Kratos turned to her. "This isn't gonna help any."

"She's right," came Raine's calm voice. "This isn't going to solve any problems and it certainly isn't going to do Anna any good."

"Yeah, that's true. Sorry Colette," Lloyd said bitterly as he turned towards her and away from him.

Kratos sighed in frustration. Although what Raine said would normally make sense to him, now his mind did not want to comply. All he could think about was storming into the ranch and getting Anna out of there before she could suffer anymore then she already did. He had never thought that this would happen again, he had been so sure that she'd never have to be there again. His emotions barraged inside of him, relentlessly and he attempting to ready himself for the battle and he turned away again.

"Kratos, wait. Tell me if what I've gathered about your plan is correct," the sound of his name drew him out of his thoughts and made his movements still as he turned his gaze to Raine with a short nod for her to continue. "You're going to the human ranch and are going to single-handedly bypass all of the Desians' defences and security systems, face all of the soldiers, find Anna from wherever she is there and rescue her?"

"That's the idea," Kratos said, and from Raine explaining to him he finally understood just how his actions might seem to all of the others.

"That's insane. You're not going to save her, you're only going to end up dead. How do you think that Anna would feel about that?"

"I am not going to die," he said as his hand unconsciously went to the Cruxis Crystal against his hand. It was not irrational considering the power that was at his fingertips.

"Kind of does sound like a suicide mission to me," Sheena said. "Look, I know you guys don't trust me or anything but she saved the people of Luin from those damned Desians. It's only fair that I help out getting her back."

"Yeah, yeah," came Colette's voice and she immediately shot up from where she was sitting. "I want Anna to be okay too. Safety in numbers, right?"

"You'll need my healing abilities. I have a hard time believing that they'd simply take her without hurting her at all, not to mention all the injuries you'll all suffer."

"Yeah dad, listen to us, we're not being unreasonable or anything. I get that before you had to do this all on you own but you don't have to anymore, you've got us here. You don't have to do any of this alone."

At those words that reminded him so much of her a response died on his tongue and silence took the group. His mind became more clear, more logical perhaps, as he took time to quickly glance at each of them and he felt an odd sense of belonging. They seemed to genuinely care about what happened to Anna, and to him. He wasn't used to not acting alone. He clutched the compass in his hand harder, and clenched his teeth. Perhaps he could not strike off alone with them conscious what with their combined determination but it was at least a day's journey to the ranch and while they were asleep it would be simple.

He nodded his head in agreement to whatever sentiment they were, and vaguely heard them say their gratitude and pack the camp so they could move as quickly as possible. He felt as though he were in a bad dream, and came to Noishe who looked at him through eyes shaped with guilt and sadness.

"Don't worry, old friend," he murmured as he stroked his soft fur. "We'll get her back."

His hand methodically stroked the fur as he thought. They were simply coming to the most logical conclusion that they could think of so he wouldn't end up killing himself and he felt an odd sense of what was it? It was hard to put into words This sense was unlike anything he had felt with Yggdrasill or any of the Grand-Generals or lifeless angels. It was something of a camaraderie mixed with gratitude at how they all expressed more then what was necessary for him, as if he actually belonged. Yet were good intentions truly enough? They had no idea of just how powerful his angelic form was and had no idea what they were up against. He could strike his own path if he so desired and he did not know which would be best for Anna.


	18. The Burning Shadows of Silence

_A/N: I was going to make this chapter longer but I thought, meh, screw it. This is plenty long, the second half will just be the next chapter. 'Cause I feel like it. If there's anything you think I could improve on, just say so._

_This chapter is named after a song by Emperor, who I listened to while writing. I wouldn't suggest checking it out unless you like death metal. They were the pioneers of using synth in death metal and pulled it off amazingly._

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* * *

_

_The Burning Shadows of Silence_

_

* * *

_

_Bam._

Anna's wounds screamed in pain as she rolled across the hard floor of what she knew was her cell. She heard metal slam against metal. It took everything she had to keep breathing, her lungs were begging for more air then she tried to breath more quickly but it only made her brain rush. Her whole body felt as though it were on fire, specifically on all the points that the whip had gone, she could barely express it in words.

It would be so easy to just stop breathing and give up and let go of all the pain and all- the image of Kratos and Lloyd tore through her mind so vividly it looked like she could touch them. Colette, Raine, Genis…all of them followed soon after, with smiling faces in a place with warmth and sunshine. The ones that showed her kindness and warmth of the world she didn't existed anymore. She couldn't give up, she had to stay alive. She focused her mind on them, seeing the contours of their faces and hair, how their voices sounded…_They're coming, they're coming, they're coming to take me away from all this. _Remember, remember…

"…remember that if she acts up in any way," voices that her mind did not compute before came rushing at her. "Even if she says or does something you think is wrong you have permission to beat her. Don't forget, there's to be no food or water given to A012 until further notice. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am," came the militaristic response. At the sound of food and water Anna's tongue reached the roof of her dry mouth and she suddenly noticed that her stomach gnawed in hunger. _Well that's just great. Time here is going to be fantastic_, Anna thought as she pried her eyes open and the blurry figures of two people in Desian costumes between the metal bars slowly came into focus.

There was no more talking and nothing save the burning shadows of silence met her ears. Typical of them to talk to her as if she wasn't there, no focus on reality now. The wounds that didn't touch the ground still stung like burning knives were stuck there, the dirt…was that in her skin now? Ugh-no, stop thinking-stop thinking about that. Her eyes widened and she moved them to see that the cell she was in, moving her neck slightly but it ached weakly in a protest she ignored. The cell was dark with walls that looked as if they were carved out by hand. _Probably by human hand_, she thought bitterly and she shuddered at the thought which sent waves of pain through her body. She moved her foot, but it screamed in protest. _Kvar whipped my foot…? _She allowed her mind go through the unpleasant memory, and remembered kicking him over and over with his hand squeezing her throat-_Oh. _

Do something. She had to do something, anything to help her escape, when they came for her. They would come for her, they had to. But what…? Something to pick the lock, some breach in the defences… She scanned anything she could see without moving her aching body-the walls, they were no good for anything, they looked so solid like they couldn't be broken by anyone. The bars, they were more then grey metal, they looked brown and rusted. Her heart skipped a beat. And one of the bars had a piece of metal jutting from it near the floor, and looked as though if she pulled it, it would be off.

When she got her chance, she would take it. She'd rip that piece of metal and then she'd pick the lock. Even if she'd never done anything like pick a lock before, she had to try. If the lock was as old as the bars it couldn't be that difficult.

Right?

* * *

Night had fallen and Anna was not there with him. _If I went alone he I'd already be there by now_, Kratos thought with irritation as he rolled to his side and felt the twigs and underbrush crack beneath his sleeping blankets. _Flying is much quicker then this trek through the woods_. _For all I know she could be hurt and bleeding and dead… _he gripped the blankets tightly with his fingers and his stomach twisted as his mind came to the image of her skin paling beyond what was natural with her hand limp in his own and her blood-_Enough! _he screamed to himself and his eyes shot opened to see the darkened forms of tree trunks in front of him and he deepened his breath to try to calm the pounding of his heart. The image was gone but not without constant effort. Stop it, stop it, stop it. He needed to go to her. He needed to find her and to get her back to Luin and to tell her that everything was alright.

_What would she think about me leaving them to find her? Perhaps she would be angry with me…or perhaps she would be grateful,_ he thought as he rose, feeling the blankets fall to his legs and brought a hand to his forehead that was cool from the night air. _I can't be dead, _a small voice in his head that sounded like the echo of Anna's._ Kvar still needs that damned crystal from me. I don't care if you stay or you go, just don't be doing anything stupid, alright, honey?_ He chuckled at the thought. That was just like something that Anna would say, it seemed that he did have a sliver of imagination despite what she may think. He'd have to tell her of it when he got her back. She'd laugh of course, perhaps questioning his sanity. He ran a hand through his hair, and saw Noishe in his peripheral vision, curled but metres away from him and Kratos turned to him to see his brown eyes staring at him.

"Couldn't sleep either?" he said as got up and walked towards Noishe before sitting down, leaning his back against a thick tree. Noishe brought his head up and looked at him before bringing his head down between his paws. Kratos smiled. "Of course, I'm the one disturbing you."

Noishe brought his head up from his paws and his eyes reflected irritation before he set his head down, looking away from Kratos.

"I know, I know. You didn't mean it like that. I wasn't serious, I thought you could read my tone."

Noishe turned to him through eyes shaped with concern before Kratos felt the warm, short pressure of a head against his chest. Kratos looked down, to see the locket that hung there and his stomach lurched.

"Yes, I am worried about her. You know me well," Kratos let out a breath that he didn't realize he was holding and slouched forward. "Forgive me, old friend, this is exactly like something that Anna would do. She'd pretend nothing was wrong even though there would be and…"

He smiled at the multitude memories that came pouring across his mind. A small kiss on his lips, a smile, the featherlike touch on his hand, the knowledge that she only needed him to make her life feel complete. He sighed at the last thought, those days were gone but she-he felt the warmth of Noishe's head in his lap. He looked downward -just when did he have time to do that?- and Noishe looked upward at him through those eyes.

"Do you mind hearing the ramblings of an old friend?" Noishe rubbed his head against his leg and Kratos smiled. "No, of course you don't. Thank you, perhaps getting some thoughts out of me will make me feel less…uneasy," he said as he took a pause as he sorted through the thoughts and memories so that they would be coherent words.

"I can't stop thinking about her. Even after she and Lloyd and Genis remained in Luin I never could stop even though I tried," Kratos admitted softly as he brought a hand to stroke his fur. "I've missed her and I don't know quite how I'm going to manage without her especially after the journey but…this is what she wants, this would make her happy. She chose this and…" he clenched a fist. "And now _her_ happiness is ruined because of that man. She must be in so much pain right now and I-all I want to do is to get there and tear her away from all that so she can live a life with no fear from the Desians. I feel as though I should be doing something, as if I should leave here right now to get her but I've never had anyone, let alone this many people, offer genuine aid to me. I've always been the one making decisions at times like this. It's strange. I don't know what to do."

Noishe's equivalent to eyebrows moved up and down and Kratos knew it was in confusion of his own.

"You see my problem," he said and he leant his back more fully on the tree behind him. "I appreciate that they want to help, and they genuinely care about us-about Anna, even me for stopping me from doing what they see as foolish. But even so..."

Kratos trailed off, staring at Noishe whose ears were perked at attention. He felt his throat a bit sore from talking so long without interruption. He had talked even less then he normally did that day that they were travelling to the ranch, his vocal chords must not have been used to it. The talk did nothing to ease the fears that lay tangled in his mind but at least it was somewhat comforting having a friend to talk to. His hand stilled on Noishe's head. Perhaps he should-

"Um, excuse me," came the voice of Colette and Kratos looked up in shock, seeing her standing there fidgeting with her fingers. Just how long had that girl been there?

"Yes?" he said, quickly burying the surprise that he felt within him.

"Uh, well, I was up to get some water from my pack and…uh, then I couldn't help but overhear what you were saying to Noishe and now here I am and, well, uh…" she said and then giggled. He frowned. She had never seemed overly intimidated by him before or perhaps it was about something other then that.

"You don't have to stand, we've been walking all day. Come, sit down," Kratos said, gesturing to a spot beside him. She looked from him to Noishe apprehensively before she moved, to sit down closer to Noishe then him, with a flask in hand. "I trust that there's something that you wanted to talk about."

"How'd you know?"

"You did approach me, apparently overhearing what I've told Noishe."

"Right," she said, and looked to her hands that were fidgeting. "I'm sorry about that, I didn't mean to."

"I know you didn't. Think nothing of it," Kratos said, with a flick of his hand, masking just how unnerved he was that Colette could hear things that he hadn't let anyone know. Silence settled upon them and he frowned. "There's no need to be nervous."

"Oh! I'm not nervous at all, I'm quiet 'cause…um, I'm tired," she said and she stretched her arms above her with a fake yawn. "I'm sorry I kind of ignored you today but it's just…you were yelling so much it was kind of scary and then you barely talked to anyone on the way here but I should've talked to you before even if I thought you were gonna yell. I know that's a silly thing to think but…"

Kratos sighed. "There's nothing to be sorry about, I should be the one that's apologizing. I don't often lose my temper. I'm sorry that you had to see that."

"That's okay," she said in a soft voice that told him that it was very much not okay.

"Come to think of it I should be thanking you. You were the one that helped me from doing something rash."

"But you're still thinking about doing something rash," she whispered with her tone tinged in uncharacteristic sadness and Kratos' interested in her perked. "You still want to go off to the ranch all alone without us."

"That's not true," Kratos said, a lie being his automatic response to something he was not expecting. "I wanted to at first but that was because I had just heard my wife had been captured, my mind wasn't working as it normally does. I wouldn't go there alone now."

"Nu-uh," she said and looked straight at him. "You're still thinking about going alone. I heard."

Kratos sighed. "Yes, you're right. I suppose there's no point in denying it now."

"But why would you want to go alone?" she asked. He turned to her, seeing genuine concern reflecting in her blue eyes. He was taken aback at that.

"You're too young to understand."

Colette pursed her lips and her brows furrowed, as if determined to do…something he didn't know.

"Maybe that's true, I know I'm young but…but, I still think you should stay with us so we can save her together," she said through a determined and decidedly loud voice. Kratos put a finger to his lips. "Oh, right! Sorry! People are sleeping," she said in a hushed voice, that was almost too quiet then she should be. He smiled. "It's just, well, even if I think you should stay I know that Lloyd would want you to stay too. He would get so upset if you were gone in the morning, that'd make both his parents that he found not so long ago gone. He acts so happy, I wouldn't want him to get worried. He'd probably assume the worst too and he'd insist we go anyway and we'd probably miss you two and then something bad could happen."

"That…is true," Kratos said with eyes wide with realization. He had never thought of that before.

"Besides, I want to save Anna too!" she said with her hands balled in front of her. Kratos put a finger to his lips again. "Oh, that's right. Sorry," she said in a voice now hushed. "Anna's so nice, I really, really like her and I know everyone else does too. I know Lloyd likes her lots since she's his mom, not that he doesn't like you too. I don't remember my mom so well so I don't have much to base this off of but I kind of feel she acts like how my mom would act if she were still here."

"Really?" he said with surprise that made his eyes widen. He had no idea Anna had made such an impact on her. He shouldn't be as surprised as he felt.

"Yep! She's very mom-like. Don't worry, we'll get her back, 'kay?" she said fervently, drawing her hands in front of her in emphasis. "It's all a matter of time. Then she'll never have to see that place again and everyone will be happy."

"Yes, you're right," he said, and he smiled at her. She was very transparent in her attempts to cheer him up. Anna had always been the one to do that. He sighed, and looked away. Now…she wasn't with him, even after this ordeal was over and he got her back-that was what was going to happen-she'd still be gone from his life.

"It's hard losing someone you love," he said softly, breaking the silence that had settled upon them.

"Yeah, I'll bet…" she said and her face darkened for mere moments before it passed. "But don't worry, you're not going to lose her. You'll get to see her and then you can laugh and kiss and hug and have lots of fun together again."

Kratos stifled a laugh at the unintentional innuendo. Her head tilted to the side. "What is it?"

"It's nothing," he said, straightening his face and a silence fell between them. He turned his gaze away from her, to see the darkened view of their makeshift campsite. There was something strange about this scenario, and there was a strange feeling he wasn't used to. It was something of camaraderie at this overt concern shown about him and those close to him. She actually cared enough to try to cheer him up, he looked over to see her sitting with her eyes half-lidded.

"Perhaps you should get some rest," he said, careful not to mention the sleep that she could not have. Her eyes snapped open and she turned towards him. "Tomorrow is going to be a long day."

"Uh-huh," she said as she bobbed her head up and down. "You have to sleep too! Don't want you falling asleep while you're fighting Desians."

Kratos smiled. "Yes, I suppose you're right."

Colette was on her feet quickly enough and she walked towards him and bent down, offering a hand. Noishe's familiar weight was off of his lap, and he took the hand, and Colette's concern reminded him so much of Anna's. People…they truly are unusual. He rose slowly, not letting any of his actual weight be supported by Colette and felt the locket move in time with him as he walked. Anna wanted him to have that, and now even her other jewellery was lost to her. He'd see her again and he'd hear her voice again and when that happened it would be more then the mere echo brought upon by his weak imagination. He couldn't afford to think otherwise.

* * *

"This is it," Lloyd said through trepidation as he gazed at the view of the Desian ranch in the light of the sun that made it's way through the trees.

"How are we gonna get in? The security is intense," Genis said beside him, but Lloyd's eyes were glued on what lay in front of him. "It's so different from last time."

"Hmm…there is a way though…" Professor Sage muttered, sounding as though she were talking more to herself then anyone. Lloyd turned to her.

"Professor, I bet you're thinking the same thing I'm thinking."

"What?" Colette asked, and he looked at her. "What are we going to do?"

Lloyd smiled. "We'll disguise ourselves as Desians and sneak in."

There was a bit of silence. Awesome!his idea was just that good that they were speechless.

"I see the gears in your head move quickly only at times like this," Professor Sage said. Lloyd's brow furrowed.

"What's that-"

"It's not going to work," dad said and Lloyd turned to him.

"Yeah, it will. It's the best i-hey, wait a minute," he said, trying to make sense of just what dad would have against any idea of his. "Do you still wanna do this on your own? I don't think anyone's gonna clear that plan, we're already all here."

"It's not that, Lloyd," dad said as he shook his head, and shifted his weight to another foot. "If this were under other circumstances I'm sure that the plan would work but they know that we're coming. They'll be expecting something like what you've suggested to happen. We'd be falling into a trap."

"Wait a sec-How would they know that we're coming?"

"That's not important," dad said. Lloyd opened a mouth to protest, but dad continued on. "Perhaps that wasn't the right thing to say. This ranch, they know what I look like and they know I'll come, they'll be expecting me."

"Then what else could we do…" Lloyd muttered as he stared at the ground while feeling dejected. How were they gonna get mom now?

"I don't think this is the best plan either," Professor Sage admitted. "But do we have any other choice?" Professor Sage said, and Lloyd's mouth closed as his stomach plummeted. It was _to_ a good idea. How were they going to get mom?

"We do," dad said after a short time. "Listen to me, and follow my lead afterwards. This will work, trust me."

* * *

A blaring siren sent Anna's heart racing and her eyes shot open to see the darkened room around her and she looked to her surroundings, feeling pain in her neck as she moved it. Where am I? What's going on? Panic set in throughout her mind.

"They're finally here! We have to go to the main halls!" a female voice yelled above the siren and Anna grimaced at the noises both were making. Why would she yell…? Memories swarmed her mind of what had happened so quickly that made everything make sense. Her stomach dropped. "C'mon, hurry. We've gotta the main halls."

"Aren't we supposed to be guarding her?" came the voice of a man. So she had two guards. What a way to make her feel special. "We should stay here."

"What are the chances of any of them finding her? This place isn't on any of the maps, it's completely hidden."

"Okay, that's true but part of the job description is to be following orders and they involve staying here."

"Yeah, but people need our help to defend things. Just 'cause they won't find her doesn't mean that they can't do some serious damage to this place. Lord Kratos is with them."

"That's what makes me nervous.

The woman sighed. "I swear, are you really a man? Do you think people get promotions in this place just by 'following orders'? We have to make a stand! You know that there are plenty of people that stay our rank for years, right? You really wanna be on guard duty forever?"

"But what if she tries something-"

"Does she look like she can do anything?" There was a pause and Anna immediately closed her eyes and made her body as limp as possible, she could feel their eyes on her.

"Yeah, you're right on this. She doesn't look like she could do anything if she wanted to."

"Then let's go," there were sounds of moments, but then nothing. "Well, what're you waiting for?"

"There's something about all this that's seemed off to me."

"And what, pray tell, would that be?" she said through a voice that was clearly annoyed.

"Isn't this supposed to be Lady Anna? You know, someone that's apart of Cruxis. She even lived on Derris-Kharlan for years and now she's on a mission with the Chosen, or at least she was."

"Yeah. So what?"

"This doesn't seem right. Don't you get it?" Anna felt a wave of confusion at that. "You honestly think Lord Yggdrasill would be alright with this? She's one of us no-"

"She will never be one of us, she's human. Once an inferior being, always an inferior being."

He sighed. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Those were just some stupid thoughts of mine. We should get going…"

"First thing out of you that made sense," she replied and Anna then heard the clinking of the buckles of the boots and the thumping of their feet against the floor. Dissent in the Desians? And in this ranch of all place. How odd. _No time to think about it. Do it later_, she commanded herself as she looked to the bars and began to crawl on her belly but the pain of her body came to her as if her whole body was fighting against h-_Ignore, ignore_, she chanted to herself . No time to let pain stop her, she had to ignore it. _Soon there'll be no pain and I'll be with them again…just wait_, she thought as she eyed the spare metal poking out of the rusted bar.

Through the dirt and dried streaks of her own blood she crawled for what seemed like forever before the bar was close enough to touch. She took a hand and grasped it holding onto it tightly as she used all the strength she could muscle as she pulled. Blood oozed out her hand, and she felt the pain to match but pain she was used to. What was a little more? _Snap. _She brought her hand triumphantly in front of her, studying the slim rusted metal in front of her. This little bit of metal was her ticket out of this godforsaken place.

Anna smiled.

* * *

_A/N: You're all marvellous. Go and eat some chocolate, you deserve it. =3_


	19. Trap

_A/N: Here__'s the next chapter. Not even a week too, go me._

_ This chapter is named after a song by The Cure since they're awesome for me to listen to as I write. _

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_Trap_

The separate panels of the white-washed corridor walls blurred together as Anna stumbled across the uneven floors of the ranch. No, they were even, she was sure that they were even-they had to be- but for some reason she had a hard time keeping steady. _No time to think about that. Keep moving_, she told herself adamantly and her hand shot out instinctively to something, anything, that would help her steady herself. Pain flowered from her hand as it grasped something solid and smooth, a wall, she steadied herself and walked as fast as her aching legs would carry her. These corridors weren't what Anna remembered, then again she never did have to walk through them like this. She shook her head and continued on through, keeping the hand on the wall for balance even if it hurt and hurt. She had to ignore it. _Why don't people get used to pain? It's-_

"There she is," came the quiet voice of a Desian or at least she thought it was. Did she imagine it? She walked faster, even if it was her mind it would suck to get caught so early-a hand grabbed her arm and she winced.

"Oh no you don't," the voice was so close and so deep, it had to be real this time. Another hand come to her other arm and held it so tightly it hurt, especially over the wound that she knew was there. No. This couldn't happen. She wouldn't let it happen. She walked as fast as she could and moved her arms up and down and left and right as she felt the hands tighten harshly against them.

"Stop squirming," came another voice and she felt pain split across her back. She couldn't stop but she was slower, she knew she was, she could see. _They…really know where to hit, don't they? _she chuckled at the thought -it was funny, right?- and she felt another blow to her back. She felt the tickle of blood trickle down.

"That's right, you listen," the voice said in vehemence, so close that she knew was there. "How do you think she got out?"

"Who knows. Looks like whoever was guarding her did a piss-poor job at it. Good thing we got her before she could actually get out."

"Yeah. Let's get her back there before one of those stupid humans finds her," Anna's stomach plummeted at the thought of that. It had taken her so long to pick the lock, so long to find her way out and avoid patrols and now it all came down to a moment of being unaware.

"Wait, you sure we get her there right away? What about punishment?"

"There are intruders here an-

"But Lord Kvar said we punish any prisoner that misbehaves," he said. _What did you just do to me, you idiots? _she thought but thought better then to voice her opinion. Ha! Thinking about things at a time like this? How stupid!

"Makes sense to me. Not like it has to be long."

Anna braced herself for the sheer pain of a sword.

But it never came.

A loud scream made her cringe and the hand loosened the iron grip against her arm. Colourful clothing filled her vision and she saw in quick movements the girl kick the one Desian that held her, and sent those cards that moved so fast that she could barely see them but she thought that she saw the girl flash a smile- Anna was drifting. The hands that held her upright were gone and she was drifting. The ceiling was so stark and white with lights that were so bright…

Warmth surrounded her, and she felt warm arms around her shoulders and knees and her side was pressed against what must've been a chest and the pressure made it hurt, like everything made her hurt now, but she didn't mind it like she did before with those stupid guards and with Kvar. There was something about the way that the arms held her, despite her head that swung painfully off the arm that made her feel safe. As though there was no way anything else could ever happen to her.

"Don't worry, dad, we can handle this. Take care of mom," that voice, she knew it, she thought as she felt herself moving fluidly along the floor, away from the Desian soldiers and whatever else was happening. That voice was Lloyd's. Suddenly she felt the cold ground underneath her, and the warm arm was gone from under her knees but the warm arm was about her shoulders and she felt her head no longer swung painfully but was tucked…somewhere but it was warm. Everything was warm, and she was pressed against a chest, it must've been.

"It's alright, everything is going to be alright," came Kratos' deep voice so close to her ear. Kratos? Was it Kratos? Just like what she wanted before…were they here? She slowly looked up, from the deep purple of his clothes that had those subtle details she never really paid much attention to until now. So much colour now, so different from the dark and the white and the brown of the ranch. _It's beautiful…_ she thought as she took the effort to look up beyond the beautiful colours to the pale neck and to see that familiar face, with it's lines and contours that she knew so intimately, come in and out of focus.

"Is that you…Kratos?" her voice rasped, even she could hear it, and she brought a trembling hand to his face.

"Yes, it is, I'm here now. Don't worry, everything is going to be alright," he said and even her mind couldn't mistake the emotion that ran through that voice. She didn't mind him repeating things especially when he talked like that, it felt so comforting. Warm pressure was against her hand that she knew was his own, but he looked to it with…was that horror? "Your-your…is…hold still. Please."

Anna murmured a response at what she knew he was offering, even if she couldn't hear right. Kratos never spoke in broken sentences. She knew that she most definitely couldn't move that hand since his hold was so tight, it almost hurt, but maybe that was just because her whole body had pain. But then the light that was blinding her eyes so much so that she had to squint and her hand felt this kind of comforting warmth that reminded her so much of him, he was the first one to use it with her after all and-

"Does that feel better?" he asked and she felt chapped lips against her hand.

"Mmhmm," she said while she gave him an encouraging smile, or at least she thought it was but his face fell completely so probably not. Why did he look so sad? She was with him now. "What's wrong?"

"It's nothing, nothing at all," he said through a small smile but his eyes betrayed them. They looked so sad and worried and so many other things her brain couldn't translate then. "Hold still I-I'll heal your face."

She nodded but wished she hadn't since it sent pain through the muscles of her neck. She saw light-white, blinding light before her eyes and she shut them only to see her lids that were bright pink. Warmth was around her face-her whole head, really, even her neck- and it felt so good and so nice she couldn't help but stop thinking for a few moments. It was over too soon but she felt her head freed from the pain that plagued the rest of her body.

She smiled and this time he smiled with her, his whole face smiled this time, she could tell, and she squeezed his hand with what strength she could muster.

"Thank you," she said and her tongue came to the dry roof of her mouth, and suddenly she was all too aware of what she was deprived of. "Water…"

"Of course," he said and she felt him move a bit before she felt a bottle to her lips and felt the warm water that her tongue so needed. She grabbed onto the flask like a lifeline and drank, feeling just how the water made it's way through her mouth and down her throat and chest, feeling a welcome coolness finally come to her stomach. She moved it away from her lips, feeling it leave her hands and she needed air. Her chest rose and fell fast painfully.

"I'm sorry, Anna, I should've known that you wouldn't have been given water. It was foolish of me not to-"

"No," she said through her breaths and she shook her head against the soft crook of his elbow. "Not foolish. You're not foolish."

"Anna, I…" his eyes looked as though they were begging her for something, something through all that sadness and happiness and concern all at once.

"Mom, are you okay?" that was Lloyd and soon she felt yet another hand on hers.

"I'm fine," she said and smiled. "I'm sorry I left to a place without saying but-"

She flew into a fit of coughs. _Probably from talking so much…_she mused to herself as it subsided.

"It's okay, mom, it's okay. I get it," he said in a tone that she knew it was not very much okay at all. "I got your jewellery, by the way, it's-"

"C'mon, we've gotta go," Sheena said, it had to be Sheena, and Anna couldn't turn to see how she looked. "I hate to break this up, really I do, but this place is crawling with Desians like the ones we downed."

"I hate to agree with her but she's right," Raine, yes that was Raine definitely, she'd know that style of talking anywhere. "You can continue this later."

"Yeah…" Lloyd said and she couldn't tell just how.

"Of course. Thank you," Anna said while feeling her throat tickle. _It should've stopped, right? She did just drink but…_ "Thank you all-"

She erupted in another fit of coughs, ones that made her chest feel as though there was sandpaper rubbing against it.

"Shh, you don't have to say anything right now. You can relax," Kratos said softly and gently and she felt the arm about her shoulders tighten, and even felt the arm under her knees come back to lift her up, this time with her head comfortably against his shoulder. Well, as comfortably as she was going to get while being carried by someone while her whole body was in pain but the feeling of being near someone she loved made that all seem not so important. Her mind slowly drifted away to the rhythmic steps that Kratos took and she felt warm and safe.

* * *

"Well, well, look what we have here," came the snide voice of a Desian that sounded as though she were talking to a dog made Kratos' lips settle in a firm frown. "A bunch of pathetic beings trying to help one of their own. How sweet."

His arms instinctively tightened around Anna, hypersensitive to the surroundings of the woods. They had made it out of the blasted ranch and now this.

"Mmm," she mumlbed and he felt her stir within his arms.

"Shh," he murmured as he rocked her slowly back and forth, ignoring whatever else that Desian woman had to say. He'd rather Anna remain asleep then have to see any of this, she needed her rest. She'd seen and felt enough in her time with the Desians, she didn't need to worry herself about it any longer. "Go back to sleep."

She mumbled in agreement and readjusted herself in his arms, moving a cheek against his shoulder. Kratos moved slowly across the uneven dirt path towards the back of their group. When the battle happened it would be better for her to be far away from the fighting and the people that wished her harm.

"Lord Kvar needs his host body," at the sound of that name Kratos felt anger flash through his mind. "Even if that host body so happens to be such a pathetic human woman, well if you could even call her a woman."

"Don't talk about my mom like that!" Lloyd's voice mirrored the anger Kratos felt. Good. "She's not just a host body and she's not pathetic! You guys are the ones that are pathetic."

The Desian chuckled. "How cute. What are you going to do if I do talk about her like that? I've known her longer then you, seen her waste away in her cell and beg and scavenge-"

"Shut up!" Lloyd said, with his swords outstretched in each hand and he took a step towards them.

"I'll do no such thing," she said through a small laugh. "Now, be good inferior beings and surrender yourselves. This way you'll all stay alive."

"Never!" Lloyd yelled, that sent birds flying from the treetops. "I'll never surrender to the likes of you."

"Well then it's time for you all to die. It's unfortunate that this battle isn't going to work out for any of you," came that same snide voice, and Kratos looked to size up the enemy. There were quite a few of them together. "A pity, wouldn't you say?"

Lloyd ran to them and the sound of steel clashing steel and cries of battle met his ears. The group had charged, as if there was an understanding underlying in each of them that this was the time that they needed to strike. He ignored the instincts that were warring within him-he had to ignore them- pushing him to join the battle. His place was not to fight alongside his son now, he knew it wasn't. Lloyd had parried a Desian's attack, and had sent him crashing to the ground. He felt a tinge of pride swell within him. Even if Lloyd's attacks were mostly self-taught, he could see an improvement in them from the clumsy attacks of Martel Temple. It was good that he could be of use to his son and he could watch him grow, even if it was a little.

Kratos wanted to join the battle. Every instinct told him that he should be there, fighting against what had attempted to destroy what was beautiful and blue in the world. It was difficult not to be in the fray of battle as he was used to. He couldn't join it, he saw Anna in the corner of his eye and felt her warm breath against his chest and he knew that this was where he needed to be. It would not do to leave why they had all made it this far alone where they could take her simply by him not being able to control his emotions. She needed him there.

He crouched down with his knees digging into the ground- sensitive to any noise that would indicate any were coming to attack-and laid her down on the grass where she lay there still with her eyes closed. He shuddered. She looked almost too still among the bramble and the grass and flowers. Light and shadow dappled along her torn clothes and her pale skin and red blood that was caked about her body. He brought a hand above her mouth to feel the warm breath that escaped the lips. Relief flooded through him, he knew he was being paranoid but he could not help the unease that had settled about his stomach, this whole situation was so unsettling to him. It wasn't supposed to happen.

Anna's eyes opened half-way, and her head turned to him.

"Whasgoinon?" she asked, and he took her hand in his. It took him a few moments to make sense of her slurred speech.

"Nothing for you to worry about," he said softly but stiffened as he heard loud footsteps behind him. Hand on his rough hilt and rose as he spun around. Clash. Steel met steel and he saw that detestable woman wear a smirk, despite the wounds that she suffered. His brow furrowed.

"Come, now, Kratos, do you truly think that Lord Yggdrasill would care about your pathetic little woman? Take it from me, let her go. You rewards from Lord Kvar would be immense."

Fury flew across his mind at the serious tone. Did she truly think that he would rather be on better terms with _that cretin _that had constantly gave _her_ pain? The muscles of his arm were taunt as their swords were still colliding before he released and She stumbled forward and he moved his sword against her belly, her armor didn't make penetration difficult he thought in the back of his mind. She was on her knees and he quickly muttered the enchantment to send lightening careening down to her, that sent her flying to the ground.

Kratos walked to her slowly and looked down at the woman that was on laying the ground in a pool of her own blood.

"M-mercy…" she whispered, before she spit blood on the ground and coughed, looking at him through eyes that were full of pain, and were begging him for help just like Anna's had. How _dare_ she?

"I'll give you as much mercy as you gave my wife," he said with the anger that flew through his mind and filled his body. He thrust his sword in her chest with as much force as he could muster and twisted it, watching the blood both clotted and not gush from the chest and mix with the dirt of the path. Her eyes were wider then what was natural and were more white then iris.

"Humph," he said as he stared at her while shaking his head and he sheathed his sword, ignoring the blood that oozed to the top of it. He would clean it later, blood seemed to be all the rage at the moment. He turned his gaze to the group. "Is everyone alright?"

"No one appears to have suffered any serious injury," Raine said as her gaze looked about them. "It's nothing that needs to be healed right away, we should get moving."

"Yeah, we can heal our wounds later, I really don't want something like that to happen again."

"Is mom okay?" Lloyd asked.

"Never better," came her weak reply and Kratos turned to her, who was staring at them through those eyes that were filled with confusion and concern and pain. He walked towards her, hearing the twigs and rocks crunch beneath his steps and crouched down to her, feeling the grass beneath his knees.

"You're not going to carry me again, are you?" she said and this time her voice made much more sense then it had before.

He smiled. "Would you prefer to walk to Luin?"

"Might be nice," she said through her hoarse voice and began to lift herself up before she stumbled and he brought an arm about her shoulders. "On second thought, I think I'd prefer you to be my personal carrier."

"Dad should totally start a business doing that," Lloyd said through a joking voice.

His smile deepened and he brought his other arm about her knees and felt her familiar weight against his chest. It was a good sign that she could joke despite the wounds that plagued her that he could not heal as well as Raine.

"Let's get outta here. Dad needs some practice on those business skills," Lloyd said, as he began to walk beside Kratos.

"My thoughts exactly," Anna said through a soft and quiet voice that was near Kratos' ear, and he felt her readjust her head to be on his shoulder and between the crook of his neck.

"Yep! I think Kratos would be great like that," came Colette's exuberant voice.

"I suppose I have no choice, I am out-numbered," Kratos said and felt Anna's laughter reverberate off of his chest and breath tickle his skin.

"Thank you," she whispered softly against his neck. "I knew you were coming, I was worried but I knew. I'm so glad that you're here with everyone, I knew nothing would happen to anyone there…you're a great man."

Kratos felt a short thrill tear through his belly and to his fingertips at that and he hadn't any idea of how to respond. He felt her breathing slow as she began to slumber. The unease that had settled in his stomach passed, and he knew that things were going to be alright at the moment between them.

* * *

_A/N: Can you guess something I added but probably shouldn__'t have? Reviews make me smile~_


	20. Violet Dawning

_A/N: I planned out at the next thirty chapters logistically and wrote it out, instead of ideas being in my brain__…which is a good thing, I'd say. So little covered, so much to go through._

_The title is named after a song that has absolutely nothing to do with the chapter. I just thought it sounded cool. It's a song by Enslaved._

_

* * *

_

_Violet Dawning_

Raine bit the inside of her cheek as she attempted to bring all of her mind into focus to heal the woman that lay in front of her on top of spare woollen blankets. She crouched over her, feeling her legs underneath her torso and she concentrated on the semi-healed wounds that she could see in the light of the dying sun which were still freshly red and opened from their thorough disinfection beforehand. It wouldn't do to seal in an infection, after all, her healing talents weren't _that_ good. She still had much to learn from books that had been beyond her reach, but at least she had Boltzman's book to pour over later. She sighed. Feeling the presence of two people standing behind her, two men to be more precise, made this healing exceedingly difficult. Annoying, if she could use that word too.

"I'll be able to heal her much quicker without you being here," she said as she flashed the offending men a quick glare before she returned to semi-concentrate on Anna, whose eyes were half-lidded. Raine wiped her brow with a hand, while the other hand steadily held her staff above Anna before she brought both back to it again.

"She's right. It's okay, you two, really it is," Anna said through a voice that lacked her usual fire and confidence. "I'm in good hands."

"At least someone agrees…" Raine muttered through her concentration, and in the back of her mind she wondered just how physically gruelling her time with the Desians was.

"Naw, I know you're good Professor Sage," came Lloyd's voice. "Mom, I…"

"No need to be worried about me, sweetie. You can always, uh, do something somewhere else."

A deep chuckle resonated behind her. "Very specific."

"Yeah, I know," Anna's voice sounded positively drained of energy. Raine frowned in concern. "But I'm sure you guys can figure something out."

"I suppose so. I won't be far if you need me."

"Yeah, me neither," Lloyd responded before Raine heard the sounds of steps that were distinctly leather against dirt and grass.

_Finally! _She thought to herself as relief flooded through her. They were gone, the talking was gone, they were off to some other part of the campsite she could scarcely care about. Now she could finally keep her mind focused solely on the task at hand and not to others that had taken to pacing beside her. _This'll be much quicker_, she surmised to herself as her mind flew to the incantations that she mumbled under her breath, and she visualized the mana flow from her body and towards the myriad of lacerations.

At the very least whomever had beaten her made certain to only cause superficial flesh wounds and nothing life-threatening. She hadn't acquired those skills yet, and that was frustrating beyond belief. Life, it was a precious thing. The light of the mana materialized about Anna's body yet again and Raine sharpened her mind to all the theory and practice of magic, not thinking of nothing save the warm mana that she channeled from her body to the wounds that needed to be healed. It took shorter then she realized before the mana dissipated and she realized that no longer was there lacerations amidst her pale skin and clothing torn in whatever had happened before.

"I'm sorry, Raine," a voice that was barely a whisper and took Raine a few moments to decipher and realize it was Anna who had just spoken.

"Perhaps you've been spending too much time with Colette," Raine said as she moved her staff far to the dirt beside her and readjusted her position to sprawl her legs to the side. At Anna's lack of response, she continued. "There's nothing for you to apologize about, your decision in Luin was the right one."

"S'not that, I'm glad I did that. If I had to redo it all over again and suffer all that pain I would," her voice was so quiet and Raine had to strain her hearing to focus on it, and not the chirping of the night-birds and the chatter elsewhere in their make-shift camp. "It's about those books you leant me. They were still in that hotel room last I checked and something tells me they're probably destroyed in the Desian attack. So…I'm sorry."

Raine flashed her a smile at her concern over such trivial things. "Don't worry about it. I've already read all those books many times before I lent them to you. There wasn't much of a selection of books, after all, Iselia isn't exactly known for it's extensive book market and libraries."

Anna's chapped lips curved into a small smile. "Yeah, that's true. It's a pretty small town. More like a village."

"Yes, it is. It shouldn't be too hard to find more copies of them if I ever needed to."

"It won't? Good. I'll be on the lookout for them. It doesn't sit well with me that they're gone for good. They're your books after all."

"If you must. It's nothing to be too concerned about," Raine said before she truly appreciated just how concerned she was over her at this time of all times. It was…nice. "I kept the books that I liked better with me."

"Oh?" her voice was louder this time. Not loud, but more secant and articulate then the soft whisper of before. "You were holding out on me? I bet you kept all the books that hold the answers of the universe to yourself. How nice."

"Yes, people often call me that," she said, stifling a laugh before she unleashed it, feeling her chest reverberate and saw Anna's slowly too, before she erupted in a fit of coughs, and rolled to her side, with a hand balled in front of her mouth.

"Are you alright?" Raine asked, unsure of what to do.

"Y-yeah," she said through a hoarse voice as she let out her last fit of coughs. "I think so."

"Water?" Raine asked, as she brought a hand to the rough cloth of her own pack.

"No, no thanks," Anna said as she wove a hand in front of her, before rolling back to her back. "I think I'll be fine."

"If you say so," Raine said, pursing her lips in slight disapproval. It was not as if Anna was a young student she could intimidate. "You're going to need new clothes, aren't you?"

"I am?" Anna said as she brought her head above just enough to see the tattered state of her clothes, then she set it down with an audible _thump._ "Well isn't that just great? I am," she said as she brought a hand to her belly. "I can't believe I had this on all that time."

"I'm sure Kratos enjoyed it."

Anna let out a short laugh. "Yes, I'm sure he did," she paused for a moment. "Wait a second, I was covered in blood and cuts, there probably wasn't much to see."

"There was," Raine said with a teasing wink and through a jovial tone.

"Oh, thanks a lot," Anna said as she brought her hands to reach for the blanket by her side and covered herself. Raine shivered with sudden realization of the temperature, she was right, it was cold. "All my clothes are in Luin too. Great."

"I have some clothes I could lend you, that is until you buy some of your own," Raine offered.

"Seriously?" Anna asked and looked to Raine who nodded. "That's fantastic. Thanks."

"You're welcome. They won't fit you as well as your others but it's better then those rags you have on now."

"Rags?" Anna smiled at her with her eyes holding it as well and Raine smiled back. "Thanks a lot."

"You're welcome," Raine said as her smile faded. "Ah, I'd recommend that you rest now. You've been through quite the ordeal."

"You're right. Good night, Raine," she said and Raine rose, and brought a hand to her pack. "And thank you…for healing me and coming for me."

"You're welcome," Raine said as she walked away to leave the poor woman some time alone so she could sleep. The night wouldn't be entirely wasted, she could still do a bit of research before she joined Anna in her slumber.

* * *

"Could you run that by me again?" Genis said, slightly bewildered at what he had just heard Colette say to him. He straightened his posture as he sat on the grass that thinly covered ground beneath him, looking at Colette whose features were alit by the fire so close to them. He knew Colette for a long time but she couldn't possibly be serious. "I really don't know if I heard you right."

"But you were nodding the whole time and saying 'uh-huh', you must've heard right."

"I was hoping I didn't," Genis sighed and brought a finger to his temple as he straightened his thoughts out about it all. Tact was important when talking to people, especially to someone that he didn't want to offend like Colette. "So what you want to do is that you want to cheer Kratos and Lloyd up while Anna's recovering by singing?"

Colette nodded fervently. "Yes, that's exactly what I want to do. You'll help me, right?"

"Uh, I can't sing Colette. I don't know the first thing about it so I guess I can't help you with that."

"Can you dance?"

"No! I can't dance, no, no dancing," Genis said all too quickly and Colette's face fell. "Look, this might work to cheer them up if this was some other time but I think they just need alone time right now. It's a lot to take in."

"But that means they'd be moping…" Colette said as she pursed her lips and turned her blue eyes to the fire before they came back to his. "I know! We should talk to them."

"Yeah, I guess we could," Genis said as he thought for a moment. Talking was definitely a better option then singing. Or dancing. His stomach twisted at the thought. "But are you sure this is what they'd actually want at a time like this? I mean, how are they supposed to be cheered up now when we just got back from a ranch?"

"That's exactly why we have to do this, don't you think?" Colette said, with both her hands in front of her balled into fists for emphasis. "They're both down and this is the time that they wouldn't even think that they want help from."

"So what's your master plan exactly?" Genis asked, knowing once Colette deciding something like this it'd be difficult for her to stop.

"Oh, well that I don't know," Colette said and she pursed her lips in contemplation. "How about we go up to both of them and talk to them."

"Uh, never would've thought of that."

"Really?" she said with a smile but confused at the statement.

"Uh…sure, whatever."

"But how are we going to talk to them?" Colette asked and it sounded as though it were more to herself then anything They're not together at all, we'd have to go in and solo-attack each of them."

"Uh, solo attack?"

"Uh huh!" she said as she nodded. "We'll each split up and talk to them and convince them to talk to each other. Maybe that'll help."

"Hmm, I guess that works," Genis said, before he looked away from Colette towards where his sister and Anna were, but with no Lloyd or Kratos. He frowned in confusion, and turned about to see Sheena who was lying in her blankets since she turned in early. Something about turning in early since she was exhausted, if he remembered right. He turned around the other way and saw Kratos and Lloyd both sitting with each other, and by the looks of it they were talking. Phew. "Looks like they're already off talking to each other. Our work is done." he clapped his hands together in a 'that's that' movement.

"What do you mean?" she asked as she swivelled around to see both Lloyd and Kratos sitting far away from the fire. "Oh, I see. I'm going over there too," she said and she turned her entire body and tried to get up but Genis grabbed her shoulder. She looked to it to his hand and turned around to see Genis. "Wh-what?"

"Don't think you should do that," Genis said and Colette turned back to him, seeing his blue and silver clothing shine in the moonshine.

"Why not?" she asked as she tilted her head to the side.

"This looks like a moment between father and son, we really shouldn't interrupt. Y'know, a family moment."

"Family moment…" she murmured to herself and looked to the ground. "Yeah, we're not family, are we?"

"Hey don't look like that, I'm sure Lloyd would love to talk to you, he does like you a lot."

"I like him too. He's a great friend"

"Yeah, not what I meant," Genis said as he rolled his eyes. They were both a bit dense about what was kind of obvious to him. "Thing is, it's just one of those things they gotta work out together, we'd be intruding. Trust me, there are things I can only talk with Raine about and I'm sure there are things you can only talk with your grandmother and father, right?" she nodded more slowly this time.

"I guess I just feel like I should do something," Colette said through a much more serious tone. No surprise there, Colette was such a nice person. Kind of sucked how she'd feel bad about not doing enough for people.

"I know what you mean, but it'll be fine," Genis said, trying to actually help out a friend. Maybe a distraction would be just the thing for this. "Don't worry 'bout it, they'll patch stuff up on their own. Let's, I dunno, go see Noishe."

"Noishe? Isn't he gone? He's scared of monsters."

"Right, right, that's true," Genis said as he thumped his foot to the ground. Best to go back to the basics, what he was good at. "Well then I'll help you out with your homework. I know Raine gave you plenty out here, and I know you don't always understand what she says about math."

"Yeah, but Kratos helped me with that, the triangles were kind of confusing but…I haven't even touched my science homework. Chemistry is even more confusing."

He nodded and smiled sympathetically. "C'mon, I'll show you how to use the right formulas. Then maybe we can do that whole 'plan of attack' thing you were thinking of. A song might actually cheer them up, later on."

"Really?" she said with a smile on her face.

"Yeah, really. Maybe you could do something nice for Anna too, heh, sure she'd like that."

Colette nodded fervently. "That's a great idea."

"But first, chemistry," Genis said as he brought a hand to her bag that was strewn, previously unnoticed, beside them and rummaged through it to find Colette's notebook. He knew she wouldn't mind if he found it for her, she was pretty laidback like that. An odd realization struck him. He had missed talking to her, more then he realized before. He grasped the notebook and pulled it from the bag.

* * *

"I can't believe mom did that," Lloyd's frustrated voice drew Kratos out of his thoughts and he drew his gaze from Raine and Anna towards his son that sat but a few strides by his side on the thinning grass that grew on the ground.

"I know," Kratos said as he straightened his posture and brought a hand to his leg as he contemplated for but moments of how best to respond. "I have to admit that it does frustrate me somewhat to know that she choose to go through all of that pain when it could have been prevented."

"Yeah, that's so frustrating," Lloyd said as he balled a fist that lay on the ground. "There had to have been a better way. She could've told me or fought them off or-or something."

"Perhaps," Kratos said, noncommittally. Lloyd still did not know the way of the world, it seemed. "Or perhaps it was the best option that she had considering the alternatives. I happen to think it was, as much as I may not like it."

"What?" Lloyd said with eyes that were widened in genuine surprise. "How can you say that?"

"Luin would've been destroyed and many of the people of Luin killed if your mother hadn't allowed herself to be captured," at Lloyd's shocked face, he brought his thoughts together for a better explanation for his son. "It's not as if your mother chose to die for Luin," _Although it wouldn't surprise me if she did_, he thought to himself but knew better then to voice it. "What she sacrificed was time and to not be in pain, she's safe now. Although we may not like it, it was the right decision."

"I guess," he said, still struggling with the idea. "It just doesn't seem right to me. Mom shouldn't have had to make that choice, she shouldn't have had to sacrifice anything just because of some stupid circumstances."

"You have much to learn," he said softly, more to himself then anything. Lloyd opened his mouth to respond but he was too quick. "Lloyd, there may come a time in your life where you, or someone you care for, will need to make a similar decision as your mother."

"Huh? Where'd that come from?"

Kratos brought a hand through his hair that was tangled and filled with the dirt and grime of the past few days.

"Perhaps you'd understand better if I gave you an example."

"You mean a hypothetical situation?"

Kratos smiled, feeling pride within him. "Yes, exactly. You remembered what a hypothetical situation is."

"I know! I'm just that good," Lloyd said and Kratos' smile widened before he brought his mind to think of a situation simple enough to draw his point across.

"Now, Lloyd, if there was a situation where it were between just one person to die and hundreds would be saved and hundreds of people to die and that one person to save, which one should you choose?" Kratos asked, and looked at Lloyd intently who was visibly thinking about the situation in his mind

"I-I dunno what I'd do, it just doesn't seem fair, choosing one life over another."

"But it's one life over many other lives. Surely one person's can't be as important as hundreds."

"That's not true. One person's life is just as important as all of the others that the person. What if you happen to really care about that one person," Lloyd said and Kratos raised his eyebrows in shock. "There's bound to be people that care about that person just as much as you care about, say, about mom and me. What do you think that'd do to them? That one person has just as much a right to be here as anyone else. If it was up to me I'd try to find a way to save them all."

"If only it were that easy," Kratos murmured to himself. He knew just how to draw the conversation far away from that which he knew he would have to think about later on in the night when they were all asleep.

* * *

"Luin…" Anna said quietly while feeling her stomach drop and her eyes widen at the destruction.

"This is…horrible," came Colette's voice but Anna had a hard time listening what anyone else said. This was her home and this is what became of it, just like she was certain Kvar wanted her to become. She felt a strange lump in her throat and she swallowed.

Smoke was rising from the rock and wooden rubble that seemed to be strewn everywhere on the cobbled and dirt roads. She turned to see a building with black charcoal that replaced the wooden frames and looked as though it could give way any minute with black tinged the roofs of so many buildings in the distance. She felt a strong arm around her waist and she knew immediately whose it was. She looked up at him quickly to see him staring at her through concerned eyes before she turned her gaze to the wreckage. He didn't say anything but the strength of his arm told her all she needed to know. It was enough. _Why does he have to keep on acting like he did before?_ She asked herself but shook her head and instead looked to see the sky that so stubbornly remained a pristine blue save but wisps of clouds. Making things worse for herself now was not a good thing, one issue at a time.

"Lloyd?" Anna said, breaking the silence that must have settled between the group as they stood.

"Yeah, mom?"

"Do you remember when you asked about how exspheres were made and I said that I'd tell you later?"

"Yeah, 'course I do. You said something about me not being ready."

"Well…I think it's best that you know how they're made now.

"Anna, are you sure that's wise?" Anna turned to Kratos who looked at her through worried eyes.

"Yes, I'm sure. I know that the truth is crueler then a lie but…" Anna took a deep breath as she sorted through her thoughts that had remained jumbled since last night. "Sometimes people need to know the truth, it's not good just to lie and hope it goes away. That's not how things change. It's running away from the problem, isn't it?" she sighed, thinking of just how much pertained to what she said. Yggdrasill flew through her mind briefly. "I think that they need to know the truth about these exspheres. It may not be pretty but it's important to know, especially with how much the Desians impact our lives," she took another deep breath in an attempt to calm the erratic beating of her heart. It didn't work.

"If that's truly how you feel," Kratos said and by the tone of his voice she knew that he didn't completely agree but he wasn't about to object. She frowned.

"You all know that the Desians work to make certain things at human ranches, right?"

"Yeah, isn't that the whole point of getting them there in the first place?" Genis said as though it were obvious.

"Yes, well, you all don't know what they make there and how," Anna brought her hand up to see the exsphere that lay embedded there, surrounded by the key crest that shone in the sun. "Exspheres are attached to every human that's taken into one of those ranches so that they can grow and people are given a number to keep track of the ones that are there. Like animals," she shook her head in disgust, feeling her short tresses against her cheeks.

"That's terrible…" came Colette's voice that sounded as though they were wounded and Anna heard many of her sentiments echoed in their group.

"I hate the Desians," Lloyd's voice retained the essence of pure hatred. That was something that she wasn't used to. "They treated you like an animal, didn't they?"

"Yes, they did," Anna sighed, knowing that she had missed something of the utmost importance as she explained. "I don't think I made myself completely clear about how they're made, though," she reached through her memories to the unpleasant fact and bit her lip. "Exspheres, they don't give anyone any extra power in their original form. They need…they need to feed off of human life, like a parasite."

"So that's why they're so dangerous with no key-crest," Raine said, more to herself then anything.

"Yes, that's right. It's not fun to live with one of those things on you, trust me, I know," she said as she stared at the exsphere in her hand. "Someone had to die for this."

There were gasps at the word, and then an unpleasant silence and Anna felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. It had to be done but she couldn't help but feel as though she were tearing a piece of the world that was. The warm arm about her waist tightened it's hold.

"I know this information is a lot to take in at once for you all, but we need to act now. There isn't the time to worry stand around and worry about what you now know. What we need to take care of that ranch so they don't try their hand and look for the inhabitants of Luin later on," Kratos said, and for once Anna agreed with him. _Finally, willing to act on something important like this. And I didn't even have to say anything_. "There must be a reason that the Desians came all the way here in the first place."

"There was," Sheena said, and she took a step forward on the dirt path encrusted with ash. "Someone escaped from the ranch and they probably didn't like that. His name's Pietro, he should still be in Hima."

"Why do you know him?" Lloyd asked.

"I-it doesn't matter right now, does it? I have my reasons."

"Yeah, okay. We should get going to Hima, then."

"Right now?" Genis said as he stretched his hands above him and let them fall. "We just got here, can't we have a rest or something?"

"Now that I think about it I am kind of beat," Lloyd said. "Everyone cool for a break?"

"Y-yeah," Colette said, and Anna knew it was because of all the information that had come to her so quickly.

"It makes sense. It wouldn't do to have all of us fall down in exhaustion on the way there," Raine said and Anna sighed. Part of her was frustrated that they weren't moving now, but she knew that they were right.

"At least they'll have time to think about it now, maybe even talk about it," Anna muttered to herself. She decided to begin to walk along the paths, and she felt him follow suit.

"That must have been hard for you to talk about," Kratos said and Anna nodded, looking up at him to judge his opinion that he seemed to want to remain hidden for now and she had no desire to unearth it.

"It needed to be done," she said with her lips in a firm line and she said no more.

They walked along the broken cobbled and dirt pathways of Luin in what was anything but amicable silence, and were inching closer and closer to the waterside. Her eyes roamed past the dark destruction of the city where there was rubble and charred wood buildings and ash to the lake that was a backdrop. It was blue and beautiful and still below the sky that had but a few wisps of clouds, mocking what had happened. It looked as though there was no destruction that took place. Gulls swooped down to the smooth depths, to find fish no doubt. _Business as usual_, she thought dismally. It was amazing how nature of all things remained unperturbed by the entanglements of human and half-elf affairs even if they led in death and destruction. And since when did she actually think of things like this? She shook her head to snap herself from the thoughts.

"Anna, you should stay there," Kratos said as their movements stilled by the waterfront. Anna turned to see him, and his face was practically emphatic. Strange…

"Stay where, exactly?"

"I know Luin is all but destroyed and I wouldn't wish you to stay here now with it like this," he said, and gestured with an arm towards the city and the wreckage. Anna didn't follow where she knew it led. "It won't be safe for you to go back to the ranch with us, there's no telling what could happen there. I want you to stay in Hima."

"Excuse me?" Anna's voice raised at the utter shock she felt coarse through her at the comment that she had never truly thought of before. "What are you talking about? I'm going."

He shook his head. "Need I remind you what that man tried to do to you? You should stay in Hima where it's safe," Kratos said in an authoritative voice that held no room for argument. Or so he thought. Anger rippled through her mind but she quelled it. It was just Kratos worried about her, nothing to lose a screw over.

"Look, I know that you're saying this since you want to protect me, and it's sweet, really it is but you don't need to. I'll be fine there. This isn't going to be like the last time, okay? It won't be like when we had a baby to protect and I was weak from that damned exsphere and you didn't have your angelic form," she said and reached out a hand to his chest where the locket was. "Now there's Lloyd who's not a baby anymore, and Raine and Sheena and Colette and Genis. You have your angelic form too, and so do I. We can do this together."

"No, we can't. Perhaps it is different then before but there's still no telling what may happen once we enter it. You need stay away from there, it's too dangerous."

"Too dangerous for me, but not for you," she said as she drew her hand away from his chest and crossed her arms.

Kratos sighed. "You're making this out as if I have no reason to think this. I am not the one that has been apart of the Angelus Project and is the only one tested to successfully create the Cruxis Crystal."

"So what if I am? He'll never touch me."

"He just did."

"I gave myself up before. This time's different."

"No, it's not. There's no telling what could happen, perhaps there will come a situation where you sacrifice yourself to save someone, Lloyd perhaps, or the prisoners," he said and Anna's frown deepened as she fought with the urge to ignore him and walk away.

"So that means that you think that you know better then me?" she asked through the anger that was building beneath her self-imposed dams. She was testing the waters and hoping that he didn't say something really stupid.

"Yes."

That was it. He said something really stupid. Did he really think that he could talk to _her_ like that? The rippling anger formed torrents that smashed through those dams and she did nothing to quell it.

"No you don't know better then me. I don't 'need to stay away from there' because of some stupid hypothetical situation that will never happen," she said, mimicking his baritone voice. "I don't know how much clearer I have to put it to you. I'm going there and that's that."

"Why would you even want to go there?" he said slowly between gritted teeth and she knew that he was trying to keep his temper in check, what with his eyebrows drawn together like they almost never did. "It doesn't make sense. He almost killed you before and he just captured you and did…and did," he couldn't complete the sentence.

"Yeah, I know what he did to me. I was there y'know," the snide comment made Kratos cross his arms, as if she cared. "So I'm supposed to let what he's done to me make me too scared to go confront him."

"You should be scared. I am," he said and she didn't respond, feeling all of the emotions war within her but the one that won out was just how

"So you want me to let you go off and fight my battles for me."

"It'd be easier if you did."

"I'm sure that it would, for you," she emphasized that and paused so he would get it through his brain. "But that isn't what I want."

"Perhaps," he said and looked as though he was thinking before walking slowly towards her with arms outstretched. "Don't go," he said and this time his voice was softer.

"What the hell is this?" Anna said as she backed away from those arms. "You just changed strategies like that," Anna snapped her fingers together. "First anger, then, what? Try to woo me or something? I'm not stupid, you know."

Kratos' mouth settled in a firm line and Anna could tell he was doing his best to hide his anger, as he squared his shoulders and made himself up to be as tall and menacing as possible. She knew the body language was largely unconscious but it didn't make her any less pissed off.

"Don't you try to intimidate me, Kratos Aurion," Anna practically hissed, walking right up to him and his frame that was so much taller then her. She glared up at him and squared her own shoulders. "I am going back there. Period."

"No you're not," he said slowly.

"Oh, and what are you gonna do to stop me? Try to keep me here against my will? 'Cause there's no way that I'm staying here on my own. You'd have to lock me in one of those destroyed homes and tie me to a chair, oh, but you'd have to gag me too since I'd scream and scream until someone found me. It'd be like a race to you, get there and get back without me dying of thirst. Think you can do it? Personally, I'd bet on me dying. It's the safer bet, I'd be guaranteed money."

There was fury in his eyes, and she glared right back up at him. He opened his mouth before he must've thought better of it and she knew it was because she wasn't doing what he wanted to something that he actually cared about. She wasn't falling in line. No surprise, he never did take well to things that happened that he didn't like. He probably thought I'd just do what he said, and fury of her own intensified in her mind. It would make sense to try to hide it, to reason with him with logic and reason. _To hell with it._

"Must you be so stubborn," he said finally, through stacatto words. "I want what's best for you."

"Sure you do. That's why you don't want me to have any closure with a man that's-" she took a deep breath, trying to calm herself. "You want to know why I want to go?" he nodded curtly and she took another deep breath, trying to calm herself so she could think clearly.

"It's the same reason you want to see him dead. He tried to ruin our lives, he tried to kill me and he wants me to be under as much pain as possible," she shuddered at the recent memories of him so fresh in her mind. "I want him out of my life. I want him to pay for everything he's ever done to me and my family. I don't know if you can understand, but I need to do this."

"I do understand," he said, through wide eyes that lost the intense anger that was there before. "But that doesn't mean that I like this," he said through a voice that echoed his words.

"You don't have to," she said as she moved towards him and took his hand to her own and tightened her hold. "I'm not going anywhere, Kratos, you're worrying over nothing. This isn't going to be like last time, you hear?"

"I hope not," he said and she knew that he didn't believe her words. She sighed, there was probably no way she'd be able to ease his paranoia. She released his hand, and leaned down to find a stone that was smooth and long to skip across the waters. It had always let her relax before even when she was a child and if she needed any relaxation now was the time. There was one, right to her left amidst the tiny and mis-shapen stones that was a lackluster gray. She grasped the cool texture in her hand before throwing it in the calm waters where it sent ripples in the waters and skipped twice before sinking beneath the waters.

* * *

_A/N: Lots of fight scenes next chapter__…gonna be fun since I hate writing them, but it needs to be done. I should learn to like them. _

_Thanks for stopping by and have a nice week. May it be filled with dresses, heels and lots of sun. I know mine will. =3_


	21. Undercurrent

_A/N: NOTE: I'm taking some creative license with the design and look at the ranch 'cause I felt like it. Don't be weirded out if I describe some things a bit differently then it is in-game. Also FYI, I have been throwing in some imagery._

_Named after a song by Ihsahn._

_

* * *

_

_Undercurrent_

The mid-morning air was crisp against Anna's skin as she walked along the carved out path on the mountainside and she breathed it in, feeling the coolness fill her lungs. She knew that others that were in front of her were talking but right now she wanted none of that and instead fixed her eyes to the ground in front of her. It was practical, the ground was quite uneven not to mention all the stones scattered about. All she wanted was to keep her mind calm to what had happened before and what she knew was going to happen sooner then she would be able to prepare herself for. It may have been a semi-cloudy day, but somehow she felt very calm despite everything that had happened and was going to happen. Funny, shouldn't she feel nervous? She shook her head, and brought her gaze up and saw the small wooden inn that was surprisingly close to them.

"Hima hasn't really changed much from what I remember," Anna said quietly as she felt the familiar strain of her leg muscles as the walk uphill steepened.

"It is a small place just meant for hikers or those in the area to have refuge," Kratos said and Anna felt a slight shock at the realization that he was beside her. She cursed inwardly at letting herself so easily get lost in her thoughts, what happened before with Kvar was no excuse whatsoever. She frowned. _Isn't he supposed to be mad at me?_

"I guess you're right," she finally began slowly, "but wouldn't you think it would've changed at least a little in all those years?" Anna asked caught a glimpse of Kratos from the corner of her eye and he shrugged his shoulders. She felt that the ground levelled and her legs thanked her for it. "I dunno, a new coat of paint or something. It looks like they didn't even repair some things. Like that," Anna pointed above to the few missing shingles, and some that looked so loose that one small gust of wind would send it flying.

"Hmm," he said noncommittally, as she saw the kids that were slightly ahead of them walk inside the inn's wooden arches, one by one. "I suppose they thought it didn't matter if these things were replaced," his voice was pretty flat and monotonous, not exactly the tone she was used to him taking with her. "I'm sure that the inn is still fully functional."

_Yep, definitely mad_, she thought as she opted not to respond to what he said- how exactly was she supposed to respond to that?- and she heard her footsteps change from that of dirt to that of the old, creaky wood of the porch that led to the open door of the inn. It's not like it mattered, there was no way she was changing her mind. He didn't have to like it. She walked through the old doorframe and opened her mouth to ask him about it but didn't have the chance to voice anything.

"Sheena!" a woman said very loudly as though she were very surprised, and Anna whipped her head towards her as she entered the inn and walked slowly towards the kids that were surrounding felt her eyes adjust to the relative darkness of the indoors.

"How's Pietro?" Sheena asked softly and the woman didn't respond. Sheena stepped forwards, and grasped the woman's arm. "C'mon, Sophia, it's okay. You can tell me."

"I, that is…" Sophia trailed off and averted her gaze from Sheena's and kept it to the ground, and Anna could tell that she was shifting her feet beneath her dark green skirts what with them swaying in a non-existent wind. She frowned. Why would she be nervous? "…He passed away," Sophia said so quietly that Anna had to strain to hear.

Oh. That would be why. Her stomach plummeted and her movements stopped dead in their tracks as she stared through wide eyes at the woman. So that was why she was acting so strangely. Now it all made sense. She caught Kratos in the corner of her eye whose gaze seemed to be more on herself then anything and she frowned. Didn't he care at all about the man? Recent memories flashed through her mind and she bit her bottom lip. No, of course he cared, he just acted like he didn't since that's who he was. Even so, it was a man from the same ranch she had been in died, and for some reason she felt somewhat responsible. There must have been something she could have done in Luin, something to stop it all from happening so he could be happy now and-

"Did he say anything?" Genis asked as he sent her from her thoughts and broke the shocked silence that had settled upon them. "Maybe something about the human ranch?" Genis added who was leaning against the desk. It was strange that he was the one to speak first.

"I-I don't know…" Sophia said, leaning her head to the right as she still shifted from foot to foot sending her skirts back and forth and fidgeted with her hands. "I don't even know if he really escaped from there."

"What about his belongings?" Raine asked, getting straight and down to the point. Just like her to do that.

"He didn't have any," Sophia said quickly.

"Where is his grave?" Raine asked.

"At the back of the adventurers' graveyard," Sophia said as she kept her gaze firmly fixed on the very worn softwood floors. Anna knew exactly the place she was talking about. _They really didn't like change here, did they? _"Please don't think about digging up his grave."

"Of course not, that'd be a terrible thing to do," Anna said offering a sympathetic gaze at the poor woman, unsure that she could see. It was hard losing someone, she of all people should know. "We shouldn't disrespect anyone's grave."

Anna turned about and walked quickly along the floors that creaked and saw the door that closed and she brought a hand to the cool metal of the knob and turned it open, walking ahead of them all in long strides not wanting any to be near her then. She cleared her mind of everything that had happened and didn't even mind how her muscles seemed to at the steep walk uphill on the uneven ground and before she knew it, she was where the ground evened out and saw past the cliff to the sky beyond that roiled with more and more clouds. She looked earthwards and saw that the graves were marked with old, broken pieces of wood that were stuck in the ground, with long poles with torn red cloth hanging from them. _Must have some kind of meaning some_, she gathered as she felt the sporadic wind against her skin and send the red cloth flying. She heard the footsteps of the others behind her yet they were devoid of any of the banter she was used to. She frowned, although she knew why. It wasn't exactly the best of news they were to have.

"I suppose digging up the grave is out of the question…" Raine muttered as she walked to the corner of Anna's eye and she looked to her.

"Of course it is," Anna said feeling a slight disgust at the very thought of it. "We shouldn't desecrate a grave."

"I know that, I wasn't saying that we should. It's simply that he may have something of value to aid us in reaching the ranch. I thought that was what you wanted."

"It is, but Sophia said that he had nothing on him. It'd be far too disrespectful."

"I said nothing of actually digging the grave up. It-"

"Uh, I think that we should pray for him," Colette's voice was not raised or angry, rather calm.

"Good idea," Anna said and gave her a smile at stopping the inconsequential argument. She shook her head, no matter how she tried to calm her mind she just didn't seem in her right state of mind at all times whenever she talked. Raine was just being practical and she didn't even suggest to actually dig the grave up, Anna was just being picky, she knew that. She sighed and bent her head down and closed her eyes, clearing her head of nothing save thoughts of the man that had died so tragically. He would be alright where he was now and-

"Hmm?" Colette's confused words made her open her eyes and look to Colette, who had already turned about. Right! She had angelic hearing now and she didn't have the option to get rid of it like Anna did. Her stomach dropped at that realization. How was it that she could let that slip her mind at times? Colette's eyes were wide and filled with confusion and Anna turned about, hearing the dirt crunch beneath her and her own eyes widened. There was a man whose pallor of his skin looked as though he had not seen sunlight in sometime and the shape his eyes took when as he caught sight of Colette looked very…distraught? Was that the right word?

"Chosen…mana…d…die…" came his raspy, low voice that sent shivers down Anna's spine. His dark brown hair was unkempt and long surrounding his gaunt face and had a beard that looked as though it had been growing for weeks, with clothing wrinkled and baggy, curving to the contours of his body.

"Wh-what's he saying?" Genis asked before he looked about to everyone with his eyes wide in shock.

"Pietro! I heard you were dead…" Sheena said through that same shock that Genis held, although it seemed far more subdued.

"Here you are," came Sophia's voice and Anna's brow furrowed in confusion. Just what was going on?

"Chosen…die…angel…die…" Pietro rasped and he took more slow steps forwards to Colette and Lloyd moved in front of Colette with a hand to the hilt of a sword. Good. "Human…ranch…underground…"

"You mustn't come out here," Sophia said, as she brought a hand slowly to his arm but he ignored it. She instead leaned up and brought an arm about his shoulders and his baggy clothing and the man instantly leaned on her. "Let's go."

_Wh-what the hell is this?_ Anna thought as she looked from Sophia to the man that were now backing away from them as she felt confusion at the situation before sudden understanding surrounded her brain and that shock was replaced by a low anger.

"You lied to us," Raine said with her voice laced in vehemence that broke the silence and Anna turned to her. Her features held a selective anger that Anna hadn't really seen her hold. _Not like I can blame her._ "He's the one that escaped from the ranch!"

"Really?" Lloyd said, sounding as surprised as Anna felt. He turned from Raine to the man, Pietro, she supposed. "Please tell me, how did you get away from the human ranch?"

"Boulder…big…underground…" Pietro said and Anna had to strain to hear him correctly, but when he did she felt confusion at it. His eyes then turned to her, that were full of none of the intelligence any other would have and were so unnaturally wide and red stringed that made Anna shudder. "…jewel…boulder…move…Chosen…"

"What are you saying?" Genis asked. It was true, the man was speaking in riddles that had always annoyed her half to deaf.

"Got me," Anna said as she shrugged her shoulders. Never did she imagine it would actually be a useful skill she'd actually need.

"Is that…" Kratos muttered before he paused and she could tell that he was attempting to decipher the words and piece together it's meaning. Of course he'd be good at it, he was the one that tried to play a game of riddles with her years ago she ended up not only making easily guessable ones, to Kratos at least, she got so frustrated that she became so turned off of the whole thing and always declined any later offers until he stopped them altogether. "The escape route?"

"Should've known you'd figure it out," Anna muttered under her breath as she kept her gaze firmly fixed on Pietro and not on Kratos to whatever response may have laid on his face.

"Please, let him be!" came the voice of Sophia who had finally acknowledged them, and looked at them through pleading brown eyes.

"Now listen," Sheena began sounding incredibly angry. "You may be happy just protecting Pietro, but because of this guy Anna was captured and now Luin's destroyed and the people are scattered! Try helping us out at least a little."

"I'm sure Pietro has many things he wants to say, as well, but because

of the curse, he's been turned into this…" Sophia looked away from them and up to Pietro that leaned against her with worried eyes that softened and she brought a hand to his face to wipe drool away from his thin lips. Anna frowned.

"Isn't that selfish to only care about him and no one else? He's not the only one that's suffering now," Anna said and Sophia's eyes snapped to hers. Anna before shot a glance to Kratos before it came back to the woman. "What about the people that are still in the ranch? I'm sure that they hate being in there just like Pietro hated it when he was there."

"We want to go to the ranch," Colette said through a calm voice tinged with a slight pleading note, as though an attempt to double their efforts. "If it's possible to get out, it's possible to get back in, right? Please."

Sophia didn't respond, instead looking back to Pietro, with her full lips pursed in concentration. "I'm willing to help you. But in exchange, lift his curse," Sophia said finally, and Pietro stumbled forwards but she brought another arm to his chest to steady him. Anna's anger at the woman was split to pity. People were difficult to hate. "The healing technique left behind by Boltzman is in the Tower of Mana. That may be able to cure his curse."

"All right," Raine said through that same calm voice she used in situations like these that sent the kids over the edge. Plenty of time to recollect herself, of course. "But infiltrating the ranch comes first. That I won't relinquish."

Anna's eyebrow quirked. She hadn't mentioned anything about actually being in possession of Boltzman's book and that she was reading it. A cool breeze shifted the loose dirt on the ground and sent dried leaves flying. Raine had seemed pretty excited about being able to expand her healing abilities from what she had gathered from their conversation about it. It had-

"When he escaped from the ranch," Sophia finally said, after sorting out her thoughts or so Anna thought. "He said he came out through the front yard and he blocked the exit with a boulder. His things are in the grave. Take them with you."

"Thank you," Colette said. "We'll come back when we've acquired the healing technique."

"Come…let's go." Sophia said to Pietro as she slowly eased him around and slowly moved back down the dirt path and presumably back to the inn's room to whatever fate laid him there. She couldn't help but feel pity for the man, despite what he had done. No, it wasn't his fault. That was the Desians fault.

"Was there a boulder there?" Genis asked.

"I do recall something that seemed unnatural." Kratos said.

"Yes," Colette said. "Let's go check it out."

"Sounds good to me," Anna said before she pushed back her thoughts to the events that had unfurled to the back of her mind. There would be time for that later. "Before we do that, I think we should stock up on supplies before we get back there. We've been running pretty low lately 'cause of everything that's happened. It wouldn't do not to have any apple gels, or Panacea bottles or even food."

"And you could get proper clothes," Kratos added with a crooked smile and Anna self-consciously fixed the sleeves of Raine's spare clothes that she had rolled up to fit her.

"That'd be great, if they even have any, it is pretty small, after all," Anna said with a small smile, slightly confused at the change of tone. "You all can dig up the fake grave without me, I know you won't disturb anyone's actual grave," Anna said

"Of course we won't!" Colette said and sounded quite appalled at the very idea. "You can count on me."

"That I can," Anna said with a smile at the girl, who returned it. "I'll go get the supplies from that small then we can meet up in front of the inn. It'll be quicker that way."

"Yeah, okay mom," Lloyd said flashing her a small smile before Anna turned about from the group and began to walk to the rock that jutted from the sides of the carved path, that was uneven and held multitudes of footprints both faded and fresh. She breathed in the mountain air, at least that would help to calm her at least a little. There was the sound of heavier footsteps that added to her own that came from behind her and she frowned.

"Yes?" she asked as she kept her eyes fixed forwards, and to the ground so she wouldn't lose her footing. She saw him come to her peripheral vision by her side where he was keeping time with her by her side. "Is there something you need me to get?"

"I…" he sounded as though there was much he did want to say, but chose not to voice it. "No, not particularly. I want to accompany you."

"Oh?" she asked as she raised an eyebrow. "And why is that?"

He sighed. "Not what you're thinking, I assure you."

"And what are you assuring me of, exactly?"

"I was just-"

"Paranoid?" she finished his sentence but referred to something entirely different then shopping.

"No," he said simply through a voice that she knew was annoyed, and the steep downhill levelled, and they turned about the inn and walked towards the small shop. "Not unless you count caring about your safety 'paranoia'. I simply want to help you find an adequate weapon."

"I think I can do that fine by myself," Anna said, ever mindful of what had happened days before that kept him on edge. It would be fairly awkward being with him, it had been ever since their conversation in Luin. "I doubt that there's much of a selection here, anyway."

"Even so, I'm still joining you," he said with a tone of finality and she sighed inwardly. "Unless you wish to tie me to a chair and gag me," she looked to him at that and saw his lips quirked in a smile.

"Ha ha," Anna said with an unintentional smile but she didn't care. This was kind of typical of Kratos, he always seemed to The stall of goods was near and her movements stilled, and she turned towards it before what must be going through his mind quickly came to hers. "You must think that I'm pretty crazy, huh?"

"I've known that for years," he said as though it were the most obvious thing in the world.

She gave a short laugh. "And you're one to talk?" She heard his own laugh in return as he brought a short sword to his hand, testing the weight of it against his arm. She looked at the array of goods that lay in front of her sprawled on cloth and wooden tables and mentally prepped her list of what was needed before she would pick and choose. Maybe this wouldn't be so awkward after all.

* * *

"This is it," Lloyd said, ignoring what Anna had said about their conversation about the right way to cook tofu curry so it didn't end up burning. She made a note to mention it later, she didn't really care to eat anything burnt again. She looked ahead of her to the boulder where Lloyd had quickened his pace to reach. It did look unusual, it was a large boulder but besides that there were some rather obvious drag marks through the dirt and foliage of the ground, and even some plants had been squashed underneath it. Lloyd had reached it and brought a hand to it for some unknown reason.

"This is the one Pietro was talking about."

"So it would seem," Raine said. "Let's try moving it."

Lloyd brought both of his hands to the boulder and he pushed it, with the muscles in his arms becoming and taunt and his heel dug further and further into the ground. _I hope he doesn't hurt himself_, Anna thought before she heard a loud grunt before he moved back his arms and rubbed them.

"It's no good. It won't budge."

"Then let's try using the Desian Orb we received from Pietro," Raine said as she rummaged in what must have been a pouch by her side to find this orb. She found it quickly enough since she grasped it in her hands before she walked towards the boulder and placed it there before quickly moving back. For reasons she did not care to know the boulder moved on it's own out of the way that Lloyd had failed at and revealed a very unusual, very dark passage which had to lead to the ranch. Now that's not something she saw every day.

"But when I pushed it, it didn't even budge…" Lloyd said as he sounded rather put out.

"Don't worry sweetie," Anna said with an encouraging smile and she walked towards him and brought her hand to his to squeeze it in comfort. It wouldn't do for Lloyd to worry over such a silly thing. "It was probably put there so no one could move it. It's not your fault it wouldn't move for you."

"Oh yeah? You think so?"

"I know so."

"That explains a lot," Lloyd said with a grin and she smiled back.

"She's your mom, of course she'd say that," Genis said as he looked up at Lloyd. "She wouldn't say why you actually couldn't do it."

"Shut it, Genis. That is not true."

Raine sighed. "That's enough, boys, you can bicker later. Let's go."

"Yeah, no use waiting like this so I can get insulted again," Lloyd said and he shot Genis a dirty look before he walked first into the dark tunnel. Anna felt pricks of apprehension in her stomach as more of their group followed Lloyd into the darkness, which turned she took a deep breath trying to calm them. Yeah, now was a great time at her nerves getting to her. Where were they before? Were they in hiding until she actually came up to it where they all deciding to gang up on her all at once? She breathed in through her nose and out through her mouth slowly in attempts to calm the pounding of her heart. There was nothing to be worried about, nothing at all, she was just going inside where she could-oh, hell, that wasn't true. There was plenty to be worried about.

"It's not too late to turn back," that familiar voice drew her from her frantic thoughts, and she blinked. No one else was entering the dark passage that was surrounded by the greenery of the forest, they were the only ones left. She turned and saw Kratos standing by her looking at her through concerned eyes. He was worried. Of course he was.

Anna shook her head slowly and became acutely aware of the necklace about her neck. "No, this is something that I need to do. No turning back now."

"Very well," he said as he sounded as though he were facing something that he had no desire to hear. Did he really expect her to say no after all of this? He sighed and ran a hand through his auburn hair that gleamed in the dapples of sunlight. "You'll be in your-"

"Of course I will," Anna said. She knew exactly what he was talking about, and at the mention of it she did just as he asked, feeling it ease a bit of her anxieties. At least it was good for something. The obvious question that he asked came from the concern that she could see echoed in his features and she knew she was being unfair. "I told you before, this isn't going to be like last time, we have the advantage here," he didn't respond right away and she knew she had to say _something_. "We've got to pull out all the tricks in the books to beat him, right?"

He gave her an uneasy smile. "I suppose so," he said as he walked towards the dark passage. Anna came towards it, and began to walk inside the darkened tunnel before him. "Do be careful."

Anna turned her head to him behind her. "I will, I promise. Do the same, you hear?"

He nodded and she turned towards the darkness and took her first steps in. She gulped, feeling the unwelcome nerves set up their home in her belly but she knew that she was not alone. This was going to be on her terms, not Kvar's, and she knew that she would not lose. She would not let him win.

The tunnel was dark and dank and Anna felt a new unease rise in her but she ignored it, that was just her mind playing tricks on her. The tunnel had already had Lloyd and the others through it and the footing was even, unlike that in Hima, so it's not as if there was some sneak attack it'd be very difficult for it to end. Anna quickened her pace so she could catch up to the ones that had a head start on them, it wouldn't do for them to wait for her or Kratos. They needed to move quickly, after all, she should at least be able to make them out.

The sound of steel clashing steel sent her stomach leaping and she ran as quickly as he legs would carry her, through all of the darkness towards the light that kept on growing larger and larger until it overcame her, but when the bright light and stark white room overtook her it didn't blind her in the least. _Least this stupid angel form is good for something_, she thought as she took in the scene, and saw a Desian that was unbeknownst to the others in the midst of casting a spell with his staff in front of him and his eyes in concentration.

Her eyes narrowed and honed instincts kicked in as she ran. Her hand flew to the hilt of her sword and she unsheathed it and brought the sword careening across his side. Blood gush from the side and she did not flinch. She brought it up again, to the arm that held the staff that had raised towards her, and again against the legs until the Desian fell to the ground, with red blood strewn about the body. She looked up to see the other Desians had fallen to the group whom Raine was healing and she shook her head and looked to the sword in her hand, that had dents of wear from it's previous owner. It may have a different weight to what she was used to but it still served her well. She sheathed it and walked towards the group.

"Is everyone alright," Anna asked and saw that the others who were easy to pick out from the stark background that she had no desire to take note of.

"Yes, everyone seems to be fine. We caught them by surprise," Raine said as she finished healing a wound of Genis' arm, then walked towards a wall with varying buttons and amidst the pale gray metal with a steady hum that Anna never could stand. "Let's bring up the ranch-wide map."

The beeping of buttons joined the low hum of the computers and more quickly then Anna expected a map of the ranch appeared before them, floating in the midst of the room. She winced but quickly hid it, all of this technology reminded her exactly of how it was before on Derris-Kharlan and she despised it.

"Professor, you're fantastic!" Lloyd said, that Raine acknowledged with the flick of her wrist as more low beeps and clicking came from the buttons.

"Hmm, so there are people on this side who can operate machines, too…" Sheena whispered. Anna's ears perked at that and she glanced quickly to Kratos who did the same.

"On this side?" Genis asked with curiosity that Anna felt. "What do you mean?"

"Ah, um, nothing," Sheena said and Anna's eyebrows raised, knowing exactly what she meant. A multitude of questions arose to that but she couldn't ask now and she didn't even know if that was wise. "Just talking to myself."

"This is where we are now," Raine said as she ignored whatever distractions the awkward conversation must have served to her. A large rectangle of the map blinked in recognition. "And this is where Kvar should be," Raine said, and a different section of the map blinked. Anna stared at it and let the map burn into her memory. This was something she was not going to forget. "It appears that in order to get to the floor that Kvar is on, we'll have to deactivate the guard system."

"Guard…system?" Colette asked, as if she were trying to speak a foreign language.

"Here," Raine said, and brought up yet another part of the map forwards, that consisted of a few rectangles for emphasis that blinked a few times.

"If we don't deactivate this guard system, we can't get to Kvar."

"What are we supposed to do, then?" Lloyd asked with a rising panic in his voice.

"It's alright, sweetie, there has to be a way," Anna said with a reassuring smile that did not mirror the unease and nerves that decided to shoot back up inside her.

"Yes, that's right. There should be a switch somewhere to deactivate the system," Raine said through the same tone that seemed as though she were working her way through a riddle. "Here it is," and two different areas of the map lit up and blinked. "See the two switches at the ends of this left-right passageway? Those are the deactivation switches."

"Okay, then, let's go deactivate it," Lloyd said.

"Wait a minute. I'll bring up the route leading to Kvar's room," Raine said and paused, leaving no sound in the room save the low hum from the computers. "It looks like the conveyor belt prevents passage through there. In order to stop that, we'll need to stop the conveyor belt control mechanism, but…" Raine trailed off, and Anna couldn't help but feel grateful at just how much effort she was putting into these efforts. That's right, she couldn't afford second thoughts, there was more then just her on the line here. "It seems it's constructed in such a way that you can't get close to the control mechanism while containers are on the conveyor. Let's see, in order to adjust the container dispatch control system. "

A blaring siren flew through whatever else was on Anna's mind.

"Damn it," Raine said. "They've detected my access of the main computer."

"Lloyd, what do we do?" Genis exclaimed through thinly veiled panic. "The Desians will be here any minute!"

"Damn it…" Lloyd muttered under his breath.

"It looks like we don't have any choice," Raine said as she turned towards the rest of the them with a decisive edge to her voice. "Let's split into two teams to deactivate the system and to infiltrate Kvar's room."

"What?" came Genis' shocked voice. "We're going to split up?"

"There seems to be no other way," Kratos said sounding eerily calm, and Anna turned to him. There was that mask again. He was hiding whatever was on his mind, or at least he was trying to. She could read him. "I would like to be in the group that goes after Kvar."

"Same here," Anna said, but didn't quite know if she meant it anymore. No, she did. No amount of unease was going to stop this.

"Me, too!" Genis said.

"And me," Sheena said.

"Colette, please choose for us," Raine said through an authoritative tone.

"Ah, um, well, then…" Colette's eyes looked from each of them with uncertainty reflected in her blue eyes. Poor girl, it's too much responsibility for her. She's probably used to having others make decisions for her. "I'll leave it to Lloyd."

"What?" Lloyd said through surprise. "Me?"

"I know you'll do a good job of splitting us up."

"Dunno about that, he lives only by intuition and instinct," Genis said with his thin lips turned in a slight smirk.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Lloyd said as he rolled his eyes. Anna smiled, it was odd how those two boys could tease each other at a time like this. "Anyway, I'm the one that's gonna pick? I'm going to Kvar."

"So am I," Anna said firmly, swallowing the fears that overtook her mind. This had to be done.

"Anna," Kratos said and Anna turned to him feeling a fleeting annoyance mixed with some odd sense of gratitude. She pushed that gratitude to the back of her mind, she did not come here to take the coward's way and let the one's she loved take care of something that concerned her and her alone. He was not going to stop her. Kratos took a breath, as if preparing himself for what he knew would be an argument. "I don't think that-"

"Yeah, well I do. Didn't we go through this already?" she said and she crossed her arms across her chest and tapped a foot against the metallic floor that thumped in time. "There is absolutely no negotiation about this. I am going, there's no way you're going to talk me out of it."

"What do you hope to gain from this?"

"Revenge. I want to see him dead," she said and saw a fleeting look of shock cross his face before it disappeared and his lips thinned. Why would he look so surprised? Didn't they go over this before? She thought better then to cover territory "Isn't that what you want too?"

"Yes but I-"

"We're wasting time," she said and he gave her an annoyed glance as though he knew it were true.

"Well it seems that we have our infiltration team already," Raine said and broke into their conversation with relative ease and that same calm voice and Anna gave her a grateful smile that she returned. At least someone didn't think she was being completely insane for this, although she wouldn't blame her if she actually thought that. "It seems you didn't have to choose, Lloyd," she added.

"Yeah, I guess not…" Lloyd trailed off and shifted from foot to foot before he turned to Anna with a concerned gaze that Anna couldn't dismiss as easily as Kratos'. "You sure about this, mom?"

Anna gave him a smile at his concern. "Yes, I'm sure. Thanks for worrying, but there's no use now," she took a deep breath and mentally prepared herself for what needed to be done, for something that she had wanted for a long time. "Now let's get going."

* * *

_A/N: Originally meant to be longer but I split it into more manageable chunks for one to be released a week after the last, plus it turned out being pretty long anyway so whateves. I'm writing this for myself now anyway and since I'm cool with it, it all works out fine. My muse wants me to focus more on a super long original thing so who am I to argue?_

_You all have an awesome, warm summery week even if you don't wear dresses, heels or wedges. =3_


	22. The Dawn of the End

_A/N: A day-ish late since I was not in edit-mode after a surprise busy 8 hour shift on like 3 hours of sleep and it kind of melted my brain for awhile. If I edited it then well, lots of things would make no sense plus since like no one cares __'bout this, so it all works out in the end. _

_Chapter named after a Borknagar song which totally rocks._

_

* * *

_

_The Dawn of the End_

This was very worrying. Really, really, very worrying. So much so that Colette felt her heart beat faster and faster even though she didn't want it to. Anna and Kratos both were leaving through the other door to where they needed to be and Lloyd was following suit and all she could do was hope that no one would get hurt during all of this and they'd all end up okay. She sent a short, silent prayer to Martel so that She'd watch over everyone during this and no one would end up too badly hurt. At least she hoped.

"Be careful, Lloyd," Colette said and Lloyd turned around and gave her a crooked smile and a wink.

"'Course I will. You be careful too, okay?"

Colette hesitated before she nodded. Somehow if he said it, it made her feel a bit better and Lloyd threw his hand up in a wave before he followed his parents through that same door. She gulped and she couldn't help her stomach from flipping in summer-saults. She was always bad at doing those when she tried when she was little, but that's not what was important right now. She turned about with her hair that moved with her movements on her back and saw the three others that looked at her.

"We should be going," Professor Sage said and sounded so calm and collected, like they weren't about to do something really, really dangerous.

"Yes, that's right," Colette said and pushed all those feelings aside. "We've got to do our part, too."

"Yeah, for sure," Sheena said and Colette nodded and walked ahead of them towards the other door that they needed to go through. "We've gotta deactivate those things for the others to get to that bastard."

Colette winced at the language but she knew that Sheena was really mad at him and she could understand why. She heard each of her companions distinct footsteps behind her as they continued through the hallways that sent nerves through her. It was so strange, she never knew that people had different footsteps before, but now they didn't all sound the same.

Maybe concentrating on those would let herself be less nervous. It was worth a shot, anyway. Professor Sage's was always very precise and careful, if footsteps could even sound like that, as though she had a pattern down and she kept it. Genis' were much different and much more haphazard and softer since he didn't weigh so much. Sheena's were different, they were so much quieter then anyone she'd heard and she had no idea why. It was a shame that she couldn't ask her why, Sheena would probably be weirded out that she was asking about something she shouldn't be able to know about. Cool metal of a door was against her body and she knew it was since she wasn't really paying close attention everywhere. Again. She was falling back and she waved her arms to try to get her balance.

"Whoa!" she said but she felt a hand come to her arm and it steadied her so she didn't feel like she was falling anymore. She looked to see Sheena beside her, and she withdrew her hand. She helped her! Yay! "Thanks so much!"

"Ah, uh, don't mention it," Sheena said and brought a hand and opened the door before she went ahead. Sheena might be a bit awkward but she knew that if she worked on it, they'd be friends before she knew it. She heard movements on the other side of the door before she even saw the Desians in the room beyond.

"Be careful!" she said before she brought hands to her chakrams and let loose the wings behind her back that always helped give her an edge in battle. She rushed forwards and let loose a chakram to the one that was really still with a staff in front of him and looked like he was casting a spell. She caught the chakram in her hand. Fireballs flashed through the room. Oh no, she wasn't quick enough. And they were going to Sheena. Not good. She rushed forward before she could think right and felt something that seared her skin and her chest and her legs in a pain that was so different from what she felt before. Then she felt something else that quickly pushed her back and to the cold, hard floor. Her back! It hurt!

Sheena turned to her with wide eyes like she didn't expect it at all. "Wh-what did you-?" She cut herself off and before she looked back on the battle and went somewhere that Colette couldn't see. Good, she was okay, that was a good thing. Maybe they could be friends after all. She heard the Professor's footsteps move really fast that didn't sound like the pattern that Colette was used to.

"Don't move," Professor Sage said through a soft voice that sounded like she was really concerned and she saw a staff over her body that was starting to glow from mana.

"I-I'm sorry," she managed to say before she let out a whimper in pain before the warmth of the mana overcame her entire body as the healing process began and she squinted in the bright light. "'Didn't mean to worry anybody…"

The Professor didn't answer and her lips were drawn in a thin line which was probably in concentration. Spells took lots of patience to use, that's what Colette was finding out and she closed her eyes since the light got so bright, even her eyelids looked bright too. She felt more and more warmth from the mana flood her body even to the tips of her fingers that felt kind of pleasant and made all the pain go away. It got less warm and she opened her eyes to see Professor Sage standing above her who was looking away from her, before she turned to Colette and offered a hand. Colette took it and got up and brushed the front of herself off.

"Are you alright?" Professor Sage asked and Colette nodded.

"Uh huh!" she said with a smile. "Thanks so much for healing me."

"You're welcome. You should be more careful, you know that you shouldn't be doing anything too dangerous," she said in that same reprimanding tone that Colette was used to at school and she felt her stomach sink, just a little, since she knew

"But Sheena would've gotten hurt, I didn't want that to happen."

"I don't understand why," she said and brought two fingers to the bridge of her nose. "You're aware that Sheena tried to kill us."

Oh, so Professor Sage was more worried about that and not 'cause she was the Chosen? That made her feel better, she really liked the Professor.

"Thanks for the concern about me, it's real heart-warming," Sheena said and Colette turned about, a bit surprised at the voice. Wasn't there still a battle going on? She looked about and saw the two Desians on the ground in the room and nothing else that looked dangerous there. Phew! Maybe she should try to keep her mind focussed for those angel senses to work right. "Do I really need to remind you that I'm here for the same reason you guys are?"

There was gonna be an argument. Colette just knew it. "I don't think there's anything to worry about. Sheena's here to help plus I'm perfectly fine now, you healed me up good, Professor," she said as they both looked at her in bewilderment, and Genis shot her a grateful smile. "We should get going, the others are counting on us."

"Right," Professor Sage said and Colette started walking ahead in the room, where she thought they needed to go. If she was wrong somebody would stop her, anyway. She walked and examined the walls and tiled floors. Maybe the Desians could decorate this place a bit better, it was so ugly and didn't feel comfortable at all. Maybe if she could splash some colour on it the walls would be nicer- Sheena's footsteps were ganging up on her.

She looked beside her and Sheena was right there, and looked kind of apprehensive.

"Hi," she said and smiled.

"Um, hey," Sheena said and paused. "I should be thanking you."

"For walking?" Colette tilted her head to the side.

"No, not that, why would I thank you for walking?" she said through a laugh.

"Dunno," Colette said and shrugged her shoulders. "Walking through the ranch isn't that nice. Even if this is the second time I'm still not used to it."

"So I'm not the only one that's really freaked out about this," Sheena said and sighed before she looked up at Colette again. "I didn't mean thank you for walking, but for before when we were fighting those Desians."

"Oh, no, there's nothing to thank me about."

"Sure there is, you ran, or uh, floated ahead of me so I didn't get hit. Must've hurt a lot," Sheena shot her a grateful smile as she brought a hand to her own head. "Thanks."

"You're welcome! I don't mind helping at all, we're friends, right?"

Sheena smiled and this time the smile looked like it was for real. "I guess so."

Yay! Maybe this trip wasn't so bad after all, and Colette looked ahead and concentrated so she could make sure there wasn't anything too terrible ahead of them. At least made some progress with Sheena that preferred to keep to herself before, it was tough getting her to talk. There was a door and Sheena opened it, and the courtyard outside was kind of nice what with the sun and the shade. Colette smiled in thanks and moved through the courtyard, mindful of the footsteps of Desians that were outside too. She was sure they could be avoided if she tried her best, the others would follow her. Maybe the angel senses weren't so bad after all, they were kind of useful. Soon she came to a door that was surrounded by the gray walls.

"Is this the right one?" she whispered and Professor Sage nodded.

Good, she didn't get lost then. She opened the door whose handle was cool to the touch and walked through. She braced herself for a Desian but only those same, identical white corridors met her. Phew, maybe she was worried over nothing, there weren't any actual Desians inside. She could only hope Lloyd and the others had it the same way. The hallway was really creepy, she decided as they walked along it and she made sure that she was paying attention to her surroundings this time. She got lost in her own thoughts too easily, it wouldn't do to- there were Desians in front of a door. They spotted them.

"Uh-oh…" Colette said and she knew that they saw them. She thought too soon. Maybe this wasn't going to be so easy after all.

"Human!" came a loud and really, really angry voice of one of the Desians. "What are you doing here?"

"Um…um," Colette said, and fumbled with her hands. What was she gonna do?

"Colette, get ready," Professor Sage said and Colette was brought back to reality and nodded.

"Right!" she said before she unleashed her wings behind her and she brought her chakrams to her hands. No time to worry now. "Be careful everyone."

Sheena was ahead of her, and was used those weird card-things to fight against the wooden staff. When she paused Colette used the chance to let loose a chakram from one of her hands to that same Desian who had his staff raised. It was pretty mean but so were the Desians so she couldn't let herself feel bad for them. Sheena was back at that one again and didn't look like she needed any more help. Another was still with his staff raised and mana surrounded him and Professor Sage and Genis that were both doing the same.

They couldn't move to attack him, but that's where she came in. She moved towards him as fast as her wings would carry her and with both chakrams raised. She was close enough now and she felt mana flow through her as she spun and spun so her surroundings all blurred together. She hit him, she knew she did from the sounds he made and she went away from him so he wouldn't hit her. The other one was in the corner of her eye and she turned her head. He was already on the floor, the others must've downed him. What a relief.

The sounds of magic attack met her ears and the cries of pain from the other Desian. She turned and went to him, who raised his wooden staff that shook in his hands and looked pretty bloody and hurt. She raced forwards and used all the force in her arms before she released both her chakrams. They both hit him and he collapsed. The chakrams flew back to her hands and she looked away from him.

"Everyone okay?" Colette asked as she lowered herself to the floor and put her wings away along with her chakrams.

"Yeah, I am," Genis said as he put his kendama to his side.

"Me too," Sheena said.

"Let's go through this door that they were guarding," the Professor said and sounded just like they hadn't been through a fight with Desians. "If I remember correctly this is where the prisoners are kept."

"They are?" Colette was surprised at that. "That's no good, we have to help them."

"Of course," she said and Colette went to the door and entered the doors that opened without her even touching it. They revealed a dimly lit room with cells upon cells filled with so many human faces in them, behind some weird mana-field that Colette couldn't remember seeing before. Her stomach sank. Those poor people… Professor Sage went up to the panel and with a few weird beeps there was no more weird mana-field and she could see them clearly.

"Um…is everyone okay?" Colette asked as she looked from each of the faces of all of the poor people that were stuck there. Her heart sunk, some of them looked so weak and so strung out, not as bad as Anna was with her blood and wounds but even so, they looked like they had wasted away with no food or hope, and their eyes. Goddess, they looked so…

A man with a limp moved apart from the others towards them. "Who are you?"

"I'm the Chosen," Colette said and she knew that that alone would ease their minds at least a little. "This will become a dangerous place, so we'd better get out of here."

The man turned about towards the cells. "Everyone! The Chosen has come to rescue us!"

There was a definite stir in those cells along with a low hum of conversation as some moved from the cells quicker then the others. Good, at least they wouldn't have to suffer anymore. Colette knew that people

"Now, let's hurry and leave this place," Genis said, and walked towards that automatically opened. It still shocked her to see them react like that. "Everyone, please follow me."

The people were now moving towards the open door and a little girl that moved even slower then the others fell to the ground with a loud thump. At least it was loud to her. Colette weaved through the crowd of people and went up to the girl who looked up at her through deep brown eyes that were watery.

"Need a hand?" she asked as she stretched out a hand and felt the tiny one come into hers. She brought the girl upwards and she straightened her dress, if it could even be called a dress. Everyone here seemed to wear it.

"Are you okay?" Colette asked.

"Um…uh-huh," the girl said and nodded but when she began to walk again through a limp and leaned her weight more and more on Colette, she knew that the girl was anything but fine. Others that were hobbling to the exit too, some that looked in even worse then the girl was. At least now they can get help.

"Thanks for saving everybody, Chosen one," came the young girl's voice and Colette turned to her, to see those hazel eyes shaped in gratitude past her dirty face and dark greased hair that hung from her head clumped together. _Poor girl,_ she thought and her stomach sank. _But_ _she's only thanking me because I'm the Chosen…_

"Oh, you're welcome," Colette said with a smile and the girl smiled back. "Don't worry, everything's gonna be much better for you from now on," Colette said and looked ahead to see the doorway where so many looked at her through grateful eyes. _These people have it so much tougher then me. I never had to go through any of this_. It was then she knew that any thought of regret or sadness about the Journey of Regeneration wasn't good. She had a whole sixteen years, she should be grateful for that and not want any more. Why should she be selfish when all of these people could be saved if she completed it? She was only one person after all. It'd be better that way.

* * *

"What's happening?" Anna asked Lloyd as she saw the Sorcerer's Ring glow in response to whatever Desian contraption Lloyd was close to. Honestly, why would they need some metal machine-thing with a dome that glowed with mana? If it was decoration it sure was ugly. Maybe their fascination with magitechnology was something that she'd never understand.

"Uh, dunno," Lloyd said and looked at the ring on his hand that was now back to how it was before. He shook his hand a few times. "Man, tell me this thing didn't break." Something bright and blinding and loud was unleashed from his hand and she instinctively took a step back but she felt the warmth of whatever it was close to her arm. Her eyes were wide. That was a close one.

"That is not a toy," Kratos said through a no-nonsense tone. She blinked and looked to him.

"I-I know that," Lloyd said and turned to Kratos and sounded quite put out if she may add. "I thought it broke so I was just seeing if it still worked but it looks like it changed what it did before wi-"

"It doesn't matter, you should've been more careful," Kratos' tone was hard and she looked to her arm and the cloth of the sleeve thankfully wasn't singed. "Are you alright?" Kratos asked and she turned to see him right beside her that looked her up and down to see anything wrong, she knew.

"Y-yeah, I think so," she said and she breathed in and out as she collected her bearings. How did he do that? He came beside her before she even knew it. "It just missed me."

"It almost hit you…" Lloyd said and sounded genuinely shocked and guilty. "I'm sorry."

"You should, it's not a toy to be pl-"

"It's okay, it's okay, really it is. It was just an accident," she said and interrupted an argument that she knew wasn't what was needed at the moment. It was tense enough as it was, at least to her. She smiled what she hoped was an encouraging one at Lloyd. "But your father's right, you should be more careful when you use it. That thing could really hurt someone if you're not. You can do that from now on, right?"

"Yeah, sure thing, mom. Won't happen again," he said and smiled back to her. Good to hear he was feeling better about it. "Let's get going."

"Good idea. I'd love to get out of here as soon as possible," Anna said with a final smile before Lloyd turned about and began to walk away and she followed suit and moved along the room towards the white-washed corridors. The loud footsteps of Kratos were in time beside her and she took a deep breath in a vain attempt to still the nerves that resided in her.

"You're much better with him then I," came Kratos' quiet voice and she looked to him with a brow raised.

"What are you talking about?" she said and kept her voice low too. Might be better for Lloyd not to focus on their conversation right now. "You're great with Lloyd."

"Thank you," he said with a genuine smile that reached his eyes. "Although that's not what I meant when I said that. You have a much better way of putting things then I do."

"Well, that's not exactly true. You're just…" she pursed her lips as she sorted through her thoughts. "A lot blunter about things then I am."

He chuckled. "I suppose you're right."

"What's so funny?" Lloyd asked but kept his gaze right in front of him.

"Nothing," she said as she smirked.

"Aw, you're in on it too?" he said and

"Don't worry, it's not actually funny. Your father just laughs at weird stuff."

Kratos chuckled again.

"You see?" she said and pointed at him even if Lloyd couldn't see it. She flashed a smile at Kratos who smiled back, before she looked ahead to see who now had opened a door and went through beyond the corridor to a room. The door was open and Lloyd was already through and she went through before Kratos and heard the loud hum and whirr of the machinery in the room that was massive, with gray conveyor belts that moved in a set pattern with those stupid containers on them. Her heart sank. She knew what this place was.

"I guess this is what Raine was talking about," Anna said as walked towards Lloyd who was still in front of something that probably controlled all of the noisy equipment.

"So if we stop this thing," Lloyd said as though he worked it all through in his mind and he looked at what was in front of him. "We can prevent the captives from turning into monsters."

"You remembered what to do," Anna said and smiled as she stopped beside him. "That's great!"

"I know, right?" Lloyd said and looked up at her with a smile before he went back to the contraption. "Uh…so which one is it exactly? There's a lot of important looking stuff here."

"Sure is," she said. "I'm not sure myself," and that was no lie. She never cared to learn how to run any machinery, she wanted to spend as much time away from it. Kratos made a non-committal sound as he pretended like he studied it. Anna didn't get why he made a show of ignorance that he clearly did not have, he knew these things inside and out.

"I believe this one will shut it down," he said as he brought a hand to the lever that must have been the right one.

"Shutdown in progress," came an inhuman voice that held no tone whatsoever. Anna shuddered. She hated that tone. "Shutdown complete."

The very loud whirs and hums stopped after that machine talked, but there was still a low hum and when she looked past those conveyer belts she saw the Desians on patrol look about in confusion.

"They know that we're here," she said as she turned back to them and by the looks on their faces they already knew it. "Let's get going."

"We'll have to destroy those containers," Kratos said as they began to walk towards a rather steep staircase.

"How are we gonna do that?" Lloyd asked and brought a hand to the back of his head as he walked down. "Those things are kind of far away. I don't think I can jump that far and I don't really think you guys can either."

"No one's gonna need to jump," Anna said with a smile.

"Really? But what else can we do?" he asked and his brow furrowed before it looked as though an internal revelation went through his head and brought his hand in front of him. "Right! The Sorcerer's Ring!"

"That's right," she said and her smile widened. The footsteps and metal armor that clinked was ahead of them and she unsheathed her sword and ran towards the Desian that she knew was there. _Clang. _Her muscles were taunt and she bared down on the Desian with all her voice.

"You guys go ahead," she said as she hooked a foot about the Desian's ankle that fell with a thud. Dirty fighting, but it worked. "I'll make sure no Desians bug you."

Mana flooded her body and she brought her sword down to the Desian. Another ran to her, and she brought her sword up and ran as she heard the distinct sound of a sword through air. Just missed.

"You'll need help," Kratos said and she saw mana form in front of him that sent that sent that other Desian flying through the air.

"Thanks. Two is better then one," she said and shot him a grateful smile. "Destroying those containers is a one person job, anyway, you can do it Lloyd," she saw another Desian come at her. She raised her sword. "Go," Anna said as she saw Lloyd from the corner of her eye. "We can both handle this."

"Right. Careful guys," he said and he was gone and she heard his boots move against the metal of the floor.

* * *

The Desians that had patrolled the area weren't difficult to defeat, both Kratos and her dealt with them quite easily and now they were walking towards the teleporter room. Lloyd was quick at destroying those containers too, he was practical when he needed to be. She sighed and stretched her arms as she looked at Kratos that was ahead of her. The teleporter was ready to use, she could tell by all of that mana that was shot from below towards the ceiling. Nerves shot through her again at the thought of Kvar and the inevitable fight that would ensue.

"Guess this is it," she said and she took another deep breath.

"C'mon, let's go," Lloyd said through a voice that was much more determined then before. Anna felt bits of pride swell inside her despite everything.

"Be on your guard, both of you," Kratos said as looked at each of them. Anna nodded and grasped the hilt of her newly acquired sword. She hoped that it would be enough for the fight that would ensue, it was enough for those Desians. It would have to do for now.

"You too," she said and tightened her grasp of the hilt of her sword. She hoped it would be enough. "I'll let you two go in with the frontal assault, I'll work better hanging back. Oh, and know that there's going to be more then just Kvar there."

"How do you know that there are other things?" Lloyd asked.

"Not his style. I know this guy, he's paranoid. I'm sure he wouldn't let himself be completely alone and unguarded no matter what," she said and took a deep breath and looked at both of them in their eyes. "Make sure that you split up so nothing will sneak up on either of you. You have to-"

"It's alright," Kratos said and she felt a hand that squeezed her arm in comfort. "We've done all we can to prepare for this."

"Yeah, you're right," she said. "I guess I'm just a little bit…"

"Nervous?"

"Yeah, that," she said and she shook her shoulders.

"Don't worry mom," he said.

"Thanks you two. You both take care in there," she said and smiled at each of them and was reminded why she needed to do this, not just for her but for them as well. "No use in waiting anymore, let's get going."

Lloyd nodded and gave her another smile before he turned and stepped on that teleporter and light consumed him and he was gone. She took another deep breath and walked towards it.

"Be careful," Kratos said and she looked back at him.

"Can do," she said and flashed him a smile she hoped would ease his mind before she took another breath. "You do the same."

And she stepped on the spot and was blinded by the light that came from the machine and felt how she always felt when she went through one of those things. The teleporters always felt so odd to Anna and she had tried to avoid them and take a longer route if need be, they seemed so unnecessary. It just felt so unnatural and although she knew that it was perfectly safe part of her was concerned that she would end up dead beyond it, or her arm wouldn't end up where it was before. The new room materialized soon enough and she saw the back of Kvar along with the inconsequential details of the room.

"There he is," Lloyd said. "Let's ge-"

"So, this is Lloyd," a woman said that was on top of the projector, with her frame see-through so that the other side of the white-stained walls and technology was noticeable. Anna shot a look at Lloyd who looked fairly confused at the comment. "I see, he does bear a resemblance."

"So, you've come," Kvar said and ignored their arrival altogether. Anna frowned but thought better then to interrupt. Maybe some useful information would be revealed. "I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't change the subject, Pronyma! It's clear you've been stealing research data from my Angelus Project."

"I grow tired of you accusations, Kvar," the woman, Pronyma, said. Anna recognized the name in those meaningless reports she had been given and she took no time to identify but she had no idea what she looked like. That troubled her. "As I have told you, I know nothing of it."

"Stubborn woman. I suppose I should expect no less from one who usurped

the leadership of the Five Grand Cardinals," Kvar said. Usurped the leadership? Say what? Anna eyed Kratos that looked at her before he turned his gaze to the conversation. Humph, typical. "Take heed, Pronyma. Once I retrieve the Exsphere from this inferior being, I will become the leader of the Five Grand Cardinals. When that happens, you'll be begging for my forgiveness."

"You speak nonsense, Kvar," Pronyma said and Anna agreed with her. There was no way that she would allow herself to be captured. "I've also heard that Rodyle has talked you into joining him in one of his schemes." Rodyle, that was another name she recognized but had no idea what his actual purpose was. She would burn the name to her memory, if anyone was involved in the Angelus Project she needed to know more about them. "But it would be best not to believe that you can deceive Lord Yggdrasill for long."

Pronyma was gone from the room, and now there was nothing to distort the machines that lay beyond her former image. Kvar was still there and quite solid and very much not a projection. Good. Anna's jaw tightened and she unsheathed her sword and heard them do the same. It was good to be prepared for something like this.

"So the Mana Cannon is no longer a secret. Well, it doesn't matter," and he turned about and stared directly at her, with his dark eyes taunt in annoyance. She felt a bitter hatred to him flood through her at the sight of him and all of her previous trepidation was gone. "Once I succeed in retrieving that exsphere, any suspicions I might have been under will be but a distant memory. All I need is you, and that exsphere your little bastard-"

"Shut up," she spat and took a step forward with her sword raised. "Don't call him that."

"Well it seems I struck a nerve," he said and he had the gall to smirk. Her eyes narrowed. "I'll call you and your little bastard whatever I want. You are all a bunch of pathet-"

_Clang_. Her sword was against his staff faster then she knew she could move. Her muscles were taunt but she didn't care and she continued to bear down on him and his knees were buckling under her. He smiled that revealed white teeth. How dare he? Her features hardened as she kicked his shin that sent pain to her toes. He had metal armor. She forgot about that. Damn.

"_Watch out!" _that was Kratos, but why was he so lou-? Firm hands were against her arms and she was surprised that she didn't even resist those hands that gripped her arms tightly but she couldn't feel pain, and she felt the floor beneath her feet move and the white walls and the machines blur together. They stopped.

A flash of light and a flash of sound. And there was lightning. Lots of lightning, like showers of white fire that reigned down upon the spot right near Kvar. Where she was.

"Goddess," she breathed with wide eyes. That could've been her under that and there was nothing she could have done. She turned about to see Kratos that looked at her through eyes that revealed much anger and resentment and bitter hatred. Not that she could blame him, _that man_ was in the same room as them. "I…thank you."

"You're welcome," he said and his eyes softened before they were hard again and his sword was out and flashed in the lighting and sent something that sounded very metal fly away. "Be on your guard," Kratos enunciated every word before he turned to her but she knew he was. "What happened to your 'hanging back'?"

"Not my fault," Anna said. "He got me mad."

"No excuse."

"You're one to talk," she said and he broke the gaze and turned away from her, and she followed suit. Although he said nothing, he was right. Argue later, fight now. This was _not_ the right time to have any kind of conversation. There was loud sounds of steal and of the hum of machines and Lloyd was in the fray of it all, but not against Kvar but some strange, mechanic things.

"What are those things?" Anna whispered to herself. Whatever they were reminded her of jellyfish that would wash ashore different times of the year. But three of those-those, whatever they were had surrounded Lloyd and he looked as though-her heart stopped and she ran with her sword raised. Trained instinct was what she followed and she soon felt the strange resistance of metal against her steel blade, and the noise. he caught the attention of one of them It's metal tendrils spun about faster and faster and she brought her sword against the red jewel above it, and it moved away from him. She caught it's attention.

Good.

She ran and heard it's hum behind her before she swung back and felt the mana fill her body before she unleashed it to the ground, and saw that flash move across the ground to one of the other mechanic jellyfish that was around Lloyd. No time to see it's response, she turned about to see the other behind her whose movements stilled but she knew that there was mana collecting about it, what with the strange glow that the red jewel atop it took. She ran and brought her sword from below as the mana flooded through her body and she struck upwards. The glow stopped and no spell was unleashed to them, or anyone.

Good.

She struck it again and again, and used more of the momentum to slash through a tendril that caused smoke and light and whatever else come from it, and it hovered towards her lopsided. Her sword was against the steel, and she made sure that it took off another one of those tendrils. It was moving from side to side as though it was struggling to stay afloat. Good. She brought a final blow to it and she heard the hum of the machine grow louder before it collapsed in a heap to the ground.

She turned about and saw that there was another that lay on the ground in a similar fashion, and Kratos was deftly avoiding the lightning attacks of Kvar whose sounds were numb in her ears. Didn't look like he could attack Kvar if he wanted to, those attacks were keeping him busy but he was close enough to keep Kvar worried and away from them. She turned and saw Lloyd was attacking another one of those jellyfish things, but he looked worse for wear what with his sleeve torn and blood from his arm. Lloyd…no. Concern in her deepened as she ran forwards and felt the wind whip through her hair. She should be the one that's hurt, not him, even if she was more agile in that stupid form and for some strange reason she wished she could give that form to him and make it so he wouldn't hurt again. But…why? The form was terrible.

She shook the thoughts out of her-no time for thinking now- and raised her sword with mana that flooded through her and sent that mana from the floor towards that jellyfish, and jumped with a sword pointed to the ground where that thing was. The sound of steel against metal met her ears and the reverberation was against her arms and her whole body but she brought her sword out of it as fast as she could and it stood still, with smoke that rose from it. Lloyd took that time to raise his one arm that held a sword bearing against the top of the jewel. He could handle that thing now on his own now that it wasn't at full power, she knew that he was more then capable.

Her eyes whipped to Kvar that was casting one of those spells that he could do oh so quickly. Her eyes narrowed and she ran and her surroundings blurred about her but all she saw was him and all she felt was that pure hatred and anger and all of the memories of the pain and the sorrow and the everything was through her mind. He cast that lightning spell but it wasn't at her and she knew Kratos had avoided it. The sword struck his chest and she felt the bone of his ribs and the organs of the body resist the intruder but she didn't care and moved it further and further into it. His dark eyes were wide and reflected that hatred and anger that she felt but there was something else there. Humiliation. No doubt he was humiliated at who he thought was no better then an animal.

"P-pathetic…" he managed to say but dark blood that clotted came from his mouth and slithered to his face beyond. She laughed. She couldn't help herself.

"Problem speaking, hmm, Kvar?" he didn't answer. "Now you shut up and you die just like all those other people died at your hand. You are everything that is pathetic in this world. You are never," she said and twisted the sword that sent more blood out and a cry of pain escaped his lips. Satisfaction rippled through her. "_Never_ going to hurt me or my family again."

She twisted it again and saw his eyes widen before they couldn't widen anymore and any spark of life that resided in them were gone. His body slumped over and she felt such satisfaction and such a sense of, what was it? Victory… was it? Or was it something else? Well, whatever it was it felt good, like a whole weight was lifted off of her except there was more to it that couldn't be put to words. She put her worn leather boot on his body and brought the sword from his body, and she sheathed it. It was over. Kvar was dead.

* * *

_A/N: Have a good week! Yay summer! I'm seeing Toy Story 3 this week...should be interesting.  
_


	23. Borderline

_A/N: Toy Story 3 was awesome. I smiled like the whole time, except during the sad parts where I cried. I was warned about it so I didn__'t wear mascara or eyeliner…good call, gotta say, it would've been everywhere. Written while listening to Glee soundtracks. Since they do covers of songs, I'll name this after one of the songs they cover. _

_Also thanks for those that have been reviewing (you know who you are), it's not like it's necessary but it's nice to know I'm not the only one that cares about this._

_

* * *

_

_Borderline_

Anna couldn't sleep. She felt as though she had laid down for ages but no matter what her mind wouldn't still and thoughts kept tumbling back to her mind. Thoughts of the past and the present and the future of so many things and she was sick of the thoughts that didn't want to end. She opened her eyes to see the deep blue sky that was speckled with stars but for some reason there was no moon. Wait. The moon was there, she could see the outline of it but it was just a dark blue and blended into the rest of the sky. Blue moon. How odd. She sighed and she grabbed the blankets by her side that were no longer about her and she hugged them to her chest. It was an old habit, whenever something had bothered her she would find Kratos and hold him close whether he was asleep or not. There was something comforting about the warmth and feel of someone else against her that made her feel better. But these blankets held no warmth of their own and couldn't hold her back and couldn't whisper anything of comfort into her ear.

_Forget it, there's no way I'm going to get any sleep_, she thought and she sat up and let go of the blankets. No moon gave her any light to see but at least there was the dim light of their fire let her see the shadows that were cast of the others that were asleep and huddled in their blankets on the ground. _At least no one else has the same problem as me_. She turned her head to the fire to see the long shadow along the ground that belonged to someone that sat close to the fire. She knew who it was. She smiled and walked across the ground towards that fire, ever wary not to step on anyone that was still asleep. Maybe it would be like it was before and he would help her sort through her thoughts. It was worth a shot, anyway.

She sat down by the warmth of the fire and hugged her knees to her chest and looked at the flames which was low, too low, and the wood in it was charred. It needed more wood so she brought an arm to her side where she knew the wood was and threw it in. Sparks flew up towards the sky and the crackle of wood met her ears. She turned from the fire to Kratos who had a sword in one hand and a rag in the other.

"You should be asleep," he said and never looked from the rag that he cleaned his sword with.

"Same with you," she said but frowned. That was his belated greeting? "I bet you're exhausted."

"It's not as bad as you may think."

"So you mean that you're still—"

"It's necessary for now," he said and she opened her mouth to respond but she wasn't fast enough. "Don't worry, I'll be back to my human form later. It wouldn't do for a monster to sneak up on us because I was too stubborn not to use what I already possess."

"That why you volunteered for the entire night shift," it wasn't a question and her tone was accusatory and his hand slowed but he didn't look to her and instead kept his hand steady cleaning his sword. "You're not the only one here that could stay awake for hours."

"The others need their rest," he said. How odd, since when did he worry about something like that?

"Is that really why you did this?"

He sighed. "Yes, it is. They've all been through a lot these past days for something that I thought I would need to go through alone. It's the least I can do."

"That's why?" she asked and was more surprised then anything else. It was like how he used to be. "I never knew that. Th—that's actually really sweet of you," she said and he looked from his sword to her with questioning eyes.

"Sweet?" he repeated the words slowly, as though he were speaking a foreign language.

"Yeah, sweet."

"You haven't called me that in some time."

"I haven't?" she said and tried to remember when the last time she did. "Wait, I'm pretty sure I called you sweetie one time."

He smiled. "It wasn't sweetie, it was sweet pea," he said and chuckled softly to himself, probably at the memory of Ossa Trail. "I meant a time that wasn't in jest. It's nice to hear you say that."

"Must be," she said, not sure how to respond to that but he seemed fairly content with the silence and just to look at her through those smiling eyes. She wracked her brain to find something, anything, to keep the conversation going. "You sure you didn't take the whole night shift since you're crazy?"

"I assure you that's not the case," he said and his voice was very dry with a small smile on his lips. "Oddly enough that reminds me of something."

"That's weird. How could you being crazy remind you of anything?" she asked, but before he could answer she knew what to say. "Are you going to admit to me that you've been insane ever since I've known you?"

His smile deepened. "If I were then that means that you were insane enough to stay with me."

"Hey," she said with mock offence and smiled back at him. "I'm not crazy, it doesn't have to mean that, I mean, what if you tricked me to stay with you with your crazy ways."

"And how would this happen?"

"I dunno, you're the crazy one," she said and he chuckled. "What was it that you wanted to tell me, anyway?"

"I may not have as little imagination as you may think," he said and she tilted her head to the side. He smiled and she knew it was at her confusion. "I was trying to sleep one night and I heard you talk to me."

She laughed. "Oh? And what did I tell you?"

"That you would be alright and not to do anything stupid," he said and looked very pleased at her response.

"I was right! You are crazy," she said and he smiled. "Don't worry, Kratos, at least we can pinpoint schizophrenia as the cause so you can be treated."

His smile deepened. "Would it truly count as schizophrenia if it only happened once?"

"As someone completely unqualified to answer, I would say yes. Say goodbye to freedom," she said and he chuckled. "When did that happen, anyway?"

"When you were at the ranch," he said and her smile faded. She was so focussed on Kvar and herself that she didn't think of how he felt during all of it. He must've been so worried if his imagination actually came to him to ease his mind.

"That must've been tough for you."

"My imagination always has been tough for me to use," he said but by how his eyebrows were drawn together a little and his body stiffened she knew he was trying to distract her.

"Not what I mean."

"Anna, you don't need—"

"Yes I do. We're not going to be together for that much longer, we should at least talk about it," she said and bit her lip as she sorted her thoughts out. There was so much to talk about, and some of it was what kept her from sleep but there was one thing that she needed him to know. "I think I forgot to thank you."

"You don't need to thank me."

"Of course I do," she said and she moved her arms from around her legs to on top of her knees. "I haven't been acting very grateful to you for what you did but I should at least thank you."

"It wasn't just me, the others helped a great deal."

"Then I'll have to thank them too, but I'll start with you," she said and just realized that he had abandoned the sword and rag to the side. She had no idea when that happened but it was alright. It showed that he was intent on what she had to say. She took a deep breath. "Thank you for going after the ranch so we could save the people enslaved there and we could make sure they left Luin alone once and for all. Thank you for saving me and thank you for caring. Thank you for actually doing something for other people instead of just thinking about it," she wasn't sure if he would've understood how much that last part meant to her but it didn't matter. "I know this all must've been so hard on you so thank you."

"I…" he trailed off and looked completely confused at what she just said but at the same time he looked almost grateful, and there was that certain look in his eyes that she saw him take on occasion. "You're welcome."

"That's all I get?" she said and he smiled. She wasn't sure if she would know what to say if she was him. "Do you want to talk about what happened? Maybe something more then you going crazy?"

"No, not particularly," he said and he stiffened. She frowned. He must've been thinking about this a lot more then she knew.

"You sure? It might make you feel better."

"No it wouldn't. I hated it. I hated to see you look at me in such pain like before and with so much blood all over you," he looked away from her and his bangs covered his eyes. He shook his head and his auburn hair shone in the dim firelight. "I feel as though I failed you. I don't want to think what happened to you there to cause so much…" it was such a sad disbelief that his tone held and she hated it.

"You didn't fail me at all, you got me out and it's over and now I'm fine, really, I am. I'm not hurt at all," she said and was desperate to find something to take that tone away from his voice. He only looked away from her when it was something that really, really troubled him.

"But you were."

"So? It's over now and besides, a lot of what happened over there is kind of hazy to me. I don't remember some things at all, actually."

"Even the beatings?" he asked and she couldn't respond. She remembered them clearly. "Even the pain?" she couldn't answer that either. She remembered that just as well. She shuddered at the memories. "You don't have to lie to make me feel better-"

"But it's not a lie, it's the truth," she said and was offended that he thought otherwise. "They never gave me water or food so after awhile a lot of what happened blended in together but something did stick out," she said and he didn't respond. He must be thinking of what happened before. _I gotta get his mind off of what's bugging him. _"What I do remember is breaking out of the cell. Ever wonder why I was in the hallway?"

"I assumed they were taking you somewhere."

"Well, they were, but they caught me after I got out. I picked a lock."

He snorted. "You? Pick a lock?"

"I know, I know, I've never been able to do that kind of thing," she said and was encouraged at the response. "But I did do it. I took some metal from a bar and I still have no idea how I did it but it worked."

"I'm sure you found a way. I shouldn't be surprised, knowing you," He looked to her and he was smiling. Good. "What was it that seemed hazy to you?"

"Well the time in the cell, for one thing. And moving through the corridors, and most of the things, really. It's kind of like remembering a dream," she said. "It was hazy when you and the others came, too. I hope I didn't say anything too embarrassing."

"Nothing that I'll tell you about," he said with a smirk.

"Thanks a lot," she said. This was good, she got him from worrying. "I don't remember everything that happened once you guys showed up but what I do remember when you came was feeling really warm and safe. Even if it hurt I knew that everything was going to be alright."

His smile was brighter, like he'd been told something he wanted to hear. "Truly?"

"Truly," she said and she nodded.

"I'm glad," he said through such emotion and he still had that smile that now reached his eyes. "Do you remember when you told me…" he trailed off and turned his gaze to the fire.

"Told you what?" she asked and brought a hand to her side and felt the dirt beneath her fingers.

He shook his head. "It's nothing. Nevermind."

"It's something," she said but he didn't respond. She wouldn't push it, it's not like it was that important. Another topic might be best to take his mind off of what happened. "I wonder what they meant when they were talking about the mana canon."

"I'm not sure," he said and she believed him. "A weapon of some sort."

"Yep, that's where the canon part comes in. If it's a secret it's bound to be pretty strong," she said and he voiced his agreement. She replayed the memory in her mind and the words that those two exchange. There was so much wrong with how little she knew. "But you do know about all that other stuff Kvar and Pronyma were talking about," she started and there was nothing save silence that met her ears. She wasn't even quite sure why she said it but she knew it was one of those things that made sleep allude her that night. "I know you know. Care to explain?"

He hesitated. "It's not something I wish to discuss."

"And that's why you didn't tell me before?"

"You didn't need to know—"

"Oh so you were keeping that kind of information from me just because you think I didn't need to know? You still are. How nice of you."

"Whenever you were given any real information you tried to work against Cruxis," Kratos said and the fire crackled.

"And you stopped me. Yeah, I remember," she rolled her eyes and tightened her hold of her legs. This wasn't exactly how she expected this to go down. "Do you really think that I could do anything if I knew about who usurped leadership of the cardinals or whatever else that happened?"

"Humph," his stance stiffened and he continued to look at the fire but she was fixated on him. "Do you really think that I would enjoy telling you of all of the corruption of Cruxis?"

"Doesn't matter what you enjoy. I should've known before and I should know now."

"And then what?" this time he looked her in the eye. "What would've happened if you knew about it?"

This was some sort of trap, it had to be, this was what he did. "Nothing."

"My point exactly," he said and looked pleased, but not in the normal way but the way where he knew he would win the argument. He was wrong. "Nothing would have happened if you knew anything that they were talking about."

"Yes it would've, what're you talking about? I would've known a little more and would've felt a little less like a trophy wife," she said it casually, as though she were listing things that weren't important and his frown deepened at that last part but she couldn't bring herself to care. "You know, there would be a bit more trust between us and maybe it would've helped things out a bit."

"No it wouldn't have. I saw what was happening to you," he said and there was no more frustration in his voice but a sadness instead. "I didn't want to add to that by telling you everything about the corruption of Cruxis. That wasn't going to make you happy."

"But at least it would've been the truth. It would've been something. And you're not telling me now for that same reason?" she asked and he nodded. She felt more anger run through her. He was treating her like a child. "You're suc-"

"Weren't you listening before?" he asked with subtle irritation. "Nothing would've happened before if you knew and I know it wouldn't have made you any happier. If I explain it to you now all it would do is squander the time that we have together. Do you really want that?"

"Too late, huh? Well that's amazing," she said and she was bitter at how right he was about explaining it now. "Besides, I don't think anything could've made me happy up there."

Wrong thing to say. All she could see was how his eyes were shaped in such sadness and his features that looked so downcast and she could practically feel just how upset he felt. Her stomach dropped and she felt an instant guilt at the stupid thing she said. Damn. Her and her big mouth. She may have been mad but she didn't want him to look like _that_. She brought her arms to her sides and slide across the dirt to his side.

"Look, that's not what I meant," she said and brought a hand to the part of his arm where the skin was free from his violet clothing. He looked at her with confusion that mingled with the sadness. "It was just something stupid I said 'cause I was mad."

He shook his head. "Even so you are right. The truth is not always pleasant, you could never be happy there," he said and he sounded so sad. There had to be something to stop that but she couldn't deny what he said. "Thank you."

"For what?"

He smiled but his eyes weren't shaped in joy. "It's like you not to know what you've done. You've been so good to me ever since you so stubbornly came back into my life again and again."

"You don't have to thank me for that," she said and she meant it. It wasn't as though she hated him, like Kvar, he was the one that confused her senses and her mind and made her wonder over and over if there was enough left in him of who she fell in love with.

"I will anyway, you certainly did before," he said and she felt an arm come about her back and it was warm and pulled her much closer to him, and she swung her legs across from his. She…she liked this and she didn't know why. The hand that was on his arm moved and she wrapped it around him. It was so warm and he was being so gentle and her mind was blank as she stared at him but his eyes weren't sad anymore, but held that look that he only had for her.

"Aren't you glad I'm not dead?" she asked and she had no idea why. He smiled.

"Of course I am, I never wanted that to happen," he said and sounded all too serious for her liking. He moved closer and she felt the warmth of his breath through her hair.

"I was just kidding."

He chuckled and brought his other arm about her. "I know that, but it is such an odd thing to joke about," he said and she knew he was joking. She smiled and felt his warm forehead pressed against hers with his hair that tickled her jaw. "You make me smile and laugh and feel so incredible and I…" she felt him tighten his hold. "I couldn't stand it if…"

He trailed off and left the words that they both understood hang in the air.

"But nothing happened to me, I'm fine," she said and wasn't quite sure why he was so serious when she tried to lighten the mood. _Maybe he's emotionally strung out…like me… _"I made it out alive and he's dead and now everything…everything is gonna get better from here on out," she said but she didn't entirely believe those words. Better without _him_ with her?

"For you," he said and he sounded a bit bitter, but it was mixed with a sort of relief. How strange. "You'll be happier without me, I know you will. You and Lloyd will both be happy together. Promise me you will."

He sounded like he was begging like this was the last shred of whatever he wanted for himself. "Yes I promise," she said and looked him in the eye. His eyes were shaped in a kind of relief but there was sadness there and she guessed that it was because of whatever the future would hold for him without them. She knew how he thought and she couldn't stand to think how he would feel without her. "You promise to hang in there too, okay?" she said and brought a hand slowly from his back, to his chest then to his neck and caressed it. He gave her an apprehensive smile as he nodded and she felt the tickle of the hair against the skin of her hand. It made her spine shiver.

"Yes, I'll try," he said and then there was silence but she could see the light of the fire through openings of his hair. Those eyes…when was the last time she got lost in them again? She couldn't remember but now she couldn't help but feel that he was drinking in the moment.

"Before I met you I forgot how to feel."

"What do you mean how to feel?" she asked in a light tone but fully understood what he meant by the words. This wasn't the first time that he'd brought it up. She moved the hand from his neck, to his jaw, to the soft skin of his cheek in what she hoped was comforting. "You're feeling me now, aren't you?"

His chuckle was low. "Yes I am but that's not what I meant. I think you know that," he smiled and his eyes glowed in the dim firelight. "After so many years I forgot what it felt like to laugh, the simple pleasures of warmth or food or even how to feel joy. I forgot how it felt to know that someone I care for is near and I could talk to them of anything. I forgot…everything," this last word was but a whisper and she knew the undercurrent. He was afraid that was going to happen again.

"B-but…" she began and could actually hear her heartbeat in her ears. She couldn't stand hearing him sound so sad, like he thought that he was bound to forget all of those things all over again. "Couldn't you read about life up there before? I'm sure it wasn't as bad as you're making it out to be."

"Of course I did," he said but sounded patient and maybe he knew the undercurrent. "But it's not the same. The words are just words and after a time I forgot what it felt to feel those words again. It's much different to read of something then to see it myself. Like love, for instance. I thought love was but a fantasy," he said and she felt his forehead move and his warm cheek and against her own and lips were against her neck. "It's not."

"Don't forget that," she whispered and his muscles tightened. "Please don't forget about love. Not just for me but for everything and everyone. It's…" His arms tightened their hold. "It's real." And his lips pressed against her neck lightly and she shivered. They were almost apprehensive as though he were anticipating her to tear away from him but she didn't and the lips grew in confidence and her eyes widened at just what those lips invoked in her. She couldn't remember the last time that happened.

"I won't forget, I promise you that. As long as I remember you it won't be possible. It can't," his words were low and soft and sounded as though he was unsure of what he was saying. Her heart tore, she didn't want him to forget. She tightened her hold and the warmth consumed her. "I'm going to miss you," this tone was filled with such emotion. "So much," she felt his arms tighten about her. She hated that they were going to be leaving him all alone only to savour memories of what it was like to be human. "So much."

"Kratos I…I…" she said and those lips press more and more against her neck and she couldn't speak. This was different then before, he had changed. He actually helped save the people that were enslaved in that ranch and the people of Luin that would've undoubtedly been sent there, knowing Kvar and how he hated to be outwitted especially by an "inferior being". His hands moved against her back and one made it's way to her hair. He helped people. This time more then anything reminded her of how he acted before, how he actually acted and did some good in the world. His lips stilled against her neck and the warm breath that was haggard was there. A bit of hope caught in her throat. Maybe, just maybe she could convince him to do something about Yggdrasill. She couldn't bring herself to believe that nothing could be done to save the people. Maybe she could convince him, let him slowly come to the realization.

"I don't want you to go," she said softly and felt his hair against her face. She didn't know how, but maybe she could work on him, little by little. It didn't seem so farfetched now but there was a chance, she knew that. And if there wasn't then at least she could be with him. "I don't want you to leave."

"Nor I you," he said and his breath was hot against her skin. "But it has—"

"No it doesn't," she rested a cheek against the side of his head and felt his course hairs against it. "You don't have to go, I don't have to go," her mind was coming up with so much throughout this. "I can stay, I'll stay."

"Don't say that," he said through a murmur and it may have been her imagination but there was a wisp of hope in that tone. "You can't."

"But I can. We can—"

"No we can't," he said slowly then paused as though he were thinking. "Derris-Kharlan is—"

"No, not there, that's not what I mean. I meant stay with you on the Journey of Regeneration," she said and she could feel the shock from him. "Me and Lloyd could come with you. It's not like anything will happen if we stay until the other seals are released, then after we could leave, or something, I don't know. It's just a little more time for you."

"What of Luin? Don't you want to help to rebuild it?" he asked and she stiffened at that thought and she couldn't respond right away.

"What happened to Luin was terrible but…but I'm not going to be gone for that long and I'm sure the townspeople will all help to rebuild it. We could go there and see if there's anything they need, like money," he murmured his agreement. "I'll help them after this is done. Luin will still be there but you won't."

"But what of Lloyd? Do you think that…?"

"Lloyd's already seen too much. He knows about the exspheres and he's even seen Kvar," his muscles were taunt instinctively at the name. "Maybe we can help guide him as he learns more, and I know he'd love to be with Colette and Raine some more. Plus he sees it as some grand adventure, he'd be happy about coming and I…" she sighed. "I don't want you to go. I don't want you to be so sad and—"

"Shhh," he said and she felt a hand through her hair that moved in circles. His lips kissed their way from her neck to her ear. "You're certain this is what you want?"

"Yes," she said and there was no doubt in her mind.

"Thank you," his warm breath on her ear made her shiver and his lips were against her ear and jawbone and cheek and hair and he whispered his thanks over and over again.


End file.
